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31 July 2011

Rock Your Fucking Socks

Before the lot of you descend into jibbering about my off topic posts, know this- I get a shitload of emails asking me to recommend new bands.  As I spend a shitload of time researching new bands anyway, I figure it wouldn't hurt to give a few more suggestions, which I'll break up into genres for the sake of sparing some of you from the pain of exposure to new shit.
Hardcore Punk
Chest Pain- 7"
This band is exactly what you'd expect from a band that's considered hardcore punk- fast, brutal, political, and brief.  Their longest song, by far and away, clocks in at a minute and a half, and that includes 5-10 seconds of ringing out before they go fucking nuts.  If you liked any early to mid 80s hardcore, you will love this band, guaranteed.  Additionally, I've found that this band is perfect for anything that needs to be done fast and fucking hard- like high rep pullups or dips, and could work well for shorter-duration lifts for time.  Honorable mention:  Minor Threat, Warzone, and Judge



Tough Guy Hardcore
Knock 'Em Dead
Though I'm sure half of you were still busy playing Four Square and A-Ball (are kids still allowed to play that shit at school?  I'm betting that fun shit went out with Kill the Cow and would now result in criminal charges if they played it in school) in 1997, I was a rep for Equal Vision and pretty much did nothing but kick people in the face at shows and lift weights.  Those were the days- just before the influx of skinny jeans and white belts, where you'd show up to a show in workout shorts, a hoodie, gardening gloves, and a hockey mask with nothing but blood on your mind.  Well, at least that's what I did- I was straightedge, so I didn't have shit else to do.  In that era of hardcore, shit sounded Knock 'Em Dead- two steps, breakdowns, and lyrics that made you want to stomp someone's throat.  Honorable mention on this deal goes to The Last Charge, Lionheart, Your Demise, and the almighty Bulldoze, whose song Beatdown is the perfect song for singles.

Download the Album


Anarchist Techno-Hardcore
Atari Teenage Riot- Everything they've done
Before any of you get your panties in a bunch, give them a listen.  This band's cool as hell, innovative, and apparently has started a reasonable number of riots, although I doubt their on the level of Bad Luck 13 Riot Extravaganza.  In any event, this shit is perfect for high rep, frenetic stuff, and is IDEAL for sparring.  You will hyperventilate and puke, but if you're just going to crash and straight blast half the time, or crash and ground and pound, this is the ultimate pace-setter.  Forewarned is forearmed- this shit is definitely not for everyone.  Honorable mention:  Nothing, really.  Gabber fucking blows, and the male vocalist from ATR's solo work blows.

Download their new shit here.


Deathcore
Jerome- EP
Frankly, deathcore bores the shit out of me half the time, since every goddamned band sounds the same.  On the one had, you've got Acacia Strain knockoffs who all tune to A and somehow mimic each others' vocals precisely, and on the other hand you've got what amounts to Dying Fetus knockoff bands who can't decide if they want to play endless breakdowns or just be a fucking death metal band.  Jerome, however, combined the best of all possible worlds for their short-lived tenure as the best fucking deathcore band of all time, and broke up under the weight of their own awesome.  They reformed, more or less, as Monsters, but that band's not nearly as amazing.  Honorable mention here goes to deathcore pioneers Red Sky,  party metal icons Dr. Acula, and Cuz Seven Ate Nine, if only for the best song names ever.

Download the EP here.


Tech/Djent Metal
The Tony Danza Tapdance Extravaganza- III
This band is just fucking sick.  Odd timings, but unlike the odd time signature bands that immediately spring to mind (*cough* Meshuggah *cough*), they lose none of the brutality.  I've actually got a couple of this band's songs on my lifting mix, in addition to honorable mentions Into The Moat (who have the sickest lyrics of all time in the linked song) and Psyopus. I find these bands to generally be great for listening to while writing, but shit for lifting, unless they're heavy on breakdowns (like TDTE) or they get "groovy" like the aforementioned bands.

Download it.


Metal
Man Must Die- No Tolerance For Imperfection
Though I rarely venture into "mainstream" metal like Lamb of God, this shit is fucking awesome, and is probably some of the most accessible stuff I've got in this blog.  Honorable mention: I'm willing to bet anything you guys post in the comments will probably suffice.

Download


That'll about wrap it up, though I think all of you should have the following song on your mix.  I know you'll all whine that it's rap, but it's fucking Necro and Jamey Jasta from Hatebreed.  The lyrics are awesome, the chorus is awesome, and it's imminently applicable to lifting.  There's no link for a single song download, but you can find it all over the place if you like it (which you fucking better).



For those of you who hated this entire blog, a hearty "go fuck yourself", and tits.
Before you ask, I've no idea which hotel, but I hate myself for not being there.

24 comments :

  1. yo jamie i know this is your blog to do what you will and all and i respect you in all ways, having said that i couldnt give a shit about your opinions on this tired horseshit faggot mouthwash you call music

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  2. jamie, if you still (or ever) carry the torch for straightedge grind or "power-violence", check out my band vaccine. love the blog, by the way... and i should have known you were a fellow core-man.

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  3. You should check out Kataklysm. I'm pretty sure the reason they play music is to motivate people in the gym.
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UvZPJXTNoHU

    And Amon Amarth if you want some awesome viking metal with lyrics about killing your enemies with an axe
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y96q-Ng3b7U

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  4. Jamie, I love your off topic posts - for you fucks that bitch - when Jamie puts in the first sentence "off topic" quit reading if you don't like it. You don't like his music choices? Chances are he doesn't like yours either. Christ, does it make you feel better to make a post just to bash him or tell him you don't like his music. Good fucking for you. Dumb fucks. I'm an even dumber fuck for arguing with you.

    Jamie - we have similiar rants - check out my blog - www.i-am-paleo.blogspot.com -

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  5. hey,

    i actually made an account to be able to comment here after lurking for a few months now...

    love the recommendations.

    and jamie, if you're into tough guy stuff you'll love (and maybe already know) these guys:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIP-WXq09YQ

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  6. @Chibs- I think I posted about those guys in a previous blog about lifting music. That cd fucking ruled, though the follow-up blew.

    @Angela- Hahaha. I'll check it out.

    @Rough Budda- Never will there be a discussion about metal without someone bringing up those two bands. I can't say I like either, but I know plenty of metal guys who are unintelligible when they speak because they have those bands' cocks in their mouths, and are generally trying to get the guys from Behemoth to run a train on them from behind at the same time.

    @Joe- I'll check em out.

    @Slowfuse- Suck it.

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  7. Cool that you mentioned Minor Threat- loved them when I was a kid, but wow, the rest of your choices just blow. Sorry dude. Not that I would expect you to recommend Enya or Alanis Morrisette, but your short list is rather predictable and limited in range. With all due respect, stick to exploding the mythology of fitness fads and nutritional nonsense. This is where your talents lie, not as a music critic. Cheers!

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  8. Tony Danza wtf-ever is great, thanks for the heads up.
    If you want a deathcore band that's actually interesting, check out My Autumn
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fKsCR3n7EeU
    They're a little known Russian band, so some of their stuff is pretty unpolished, but much less boring than say Whitechapel.

    I guess this is more Lawful Evil than you usually like, but it really helps me get in touch with my inner evil overlord and set PRs. I guess evil overlords set deadlift PRs? Maybe?
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ihDTm_QhzvM

    Lol at you being straightedge by the way.

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  9. I love hardcore punk, but know little to nothing about it, so this post should be useful.

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  10. ahhhhhhhhhahahaha. good shit. amon amarth isn't nearly as good as a lot of that cheesy viking shit can be. they just have a catchy name and easy to digest music.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vb05jUGITUU

    this is a good lifting CD. completely percussive and heavy as balls.

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  11. Once again awesome post, found something new to add to the music list for the gym "Knock 'Em Dead" will get its fair share of love from me.

    And the Rosie Jones picture definitely helped raise the testosterone tonight...

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  12. I may be a pussy, but that music disturbs me when training and I preffer training with silence or classical music. it's no a joke.

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  13. Hey Jamie! Following this blog for quiet a while. Most unique blog on the internet so far. Finally someone who knocks sense into some stupid minds.

    I'd like to know what you think about the "Doug Hepburn Super Strength 7 day a week routine" (here is the link: http://soloflexforever.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=25&t=1760). I'm wondering why you haven't outlined any of Doug's training programs so far. To me, they seem awesome.

    Greetings!

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  14. Grabs- Doug Hepburn's actually going to be the next Baddest Motherfucker.

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  15. "I was straightedge" - rofl.

    Also, no industrial? Don't you like industrial at all or just not when you're lifting?

    Here's some bands I like:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ctz0dUdkx24 Ultima Thule
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FizS4-3Q_YM Feindflug
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cNBvzZeUIG4&feature=related Hunter

    Can someone post some good vikingmetal bands? Týr and Amon Amarth are getting boring.

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  16. Love your blog, you are a fucking genius!

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  17. Well, just as long as you keep throwing in more tits into your off-topic posts, then I'll be a happy guy!

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  18. Try out The Residents to get you in the mood:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcI5rNR5TGM

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  19. Hey C&P, loving the blog and all the work you've put into it! =D

    I had a quick question for you: What are your thoughts/opinions on the books "Starting Strength" by Mark Rippetoe and "Beyond Brawn" by Stuart McRobert?

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  20. Both are AWESOME...


    To light fires with in my wood furnace.

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  21. MacDude- I can't tell if you're being serious or not. If you're being serious, check out my older blogs, in particular this one: http://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2009/12/10-reasons-stuart-mcrobert-can-go-fuck.html

    Brainwash- ATR and Nailbomb are about as close as I get to industrial. Thanks for the suggestions, though. I'll check them out.

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  22. besides Chest Pain, most of this music is not raw enough for me. but definitely check out Trapped Under Ice, total fan favorite and awesome hardcore
    @Joe Shumsky- i love power-violence, my friend's band Sex Prisoner got picked up by To Live A Lie record, check em out

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  23. Kickass stuff. Have you heard Anaal Nathrakh?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Eb8wyG9tCMc
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mQu-Cmjeerk
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kUcFAA1dKPY

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