tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-58355242493601956662024-03-13T04:30:22.111-04:00Chaos and PainJamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.comBlogger546125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-26458157628633389412018-12-28T13:36:00.001-05:002018-12-28T13:37:07.465-05:00The End Draws Nigh...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The site is nearing completion over at <a href="https://plagueofstrength.com/">Plague of Strength</a>, so expect a redirect from this site as of this weekend. The first article to drop looks like it'll hit this weekend and will be on pullups, followed by a more philosophical one, a full blown article on Scott "Boulder Shoulders" Wilson, and the occultist Michael W. Ford's interview (when it's complete). I'll be dropping shit fast and furious! And before you ask, everything is available on the new site but has mysteriously located itself under a single one of the dropdowns. That'll be sorted this weekend, so articles will be far easier to search.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>If you've got article ideas/requests, hit me with them in the comments.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And merch is inbound, for anyone who wants some far less hackneyed gym gear. First shirt design that is in the works:</span><br />
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-41372049816675973762018-12-23T10:14:00.002-05:002018-12-23T10:14:44.428-05:00Baddest Motherfuckers Ever- Chet "I Beat Arnold Then Said Fuck Bodybuilding" Yorton<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I've pointed out, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2016/10/arnold-is-about-as-much-best.html">Arnold Schwarzenegger was mostly a paper tiger as a Mr. Olympia</a>, but even as such, defeating him has to say something about one's pedigree as everyone on Earth seems to have lined up to suck Arnold's dick back in the day. That's not to say that there were no good builders back in the day, but rather that they either competed in other federations than the Oak or the judges and federations gave the Oak preferential treatment. In any event, one of the few people to defeat Arnold in bodybuilding (and who would have smoked the Oak in powerlifting as well) is a dude about whom you've likely heard little or nothing- Chet Yorton.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Chet Yorton's life reads like it was written by Joe Simon and illustrated by Jack Kirby, with an origin story so campy and stereotypical that it only could have come from a 1940s pulp rag. Though Chet's personal habits fell in line with a whiskey-fueled backstory bearing the tagline "America's Greatest Hero," reality was for once as ridiculous as life. After a car wreck that would have killed Bruce Willis in <i>Unbreakable</i>, an almost-eighteen year old Chet Yorton was left a shattered man, and frankly I cannot describe the situation better than the great Earle Liederman:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"After he had somewhat recuperated from a total physical wreck of broken and also shattered bones, serious multiple lacerations, concussion, and also escaping by only one-eighth of an inch from death, he developed himself so rapidly despite such handicaps, that within two years of exercising he won the title of Mr. Wisconsin, and also in the same affair won an extra award for being the most muscular. Such seems to be somewhat of a record--to become a prize winner within two years after a start from physical profundity" (Liederman).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As I said, Yorton should have received a lifetime supply of spandex and latex clothing and in a better world would have spent his life battling dudes with concrete for skin who shot lasers out of their eyes while robbing banks and attempting global domination. Saying Chet Yorton is genetically gifted is like saying the Elon Musk is a marginally intelligent guy who occasionally has a good idea, but like Musk, Yorton worked his fucking ass off to develop the build he had. Training six days a week from age 18 to age 26, Yorton built a physique so dense, and with so much muscle separation and vascularity, that it looked like the product of many more years under the bar. The crazy thing was, however, that he wasn't even all that athletic growing up. Instead, it took a car crash so ridiculously it seems like one of the more unlikely death scenes in the <i>Final Destination</i> series to spur him on to training, and had his friend not been a shitty driver in an era wherein you wouldn't go to jail for forgetting to wear your fucking seatbelt, we never would have even heard of the man.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"One night as a friend was driving me home and while hitting a speed of about 40 miles per hour, he missed a curve in the road and the car struck a tree which was but two blocks from my abode. I braced myself against the floorboards but the impact drove my hips out of their sockets. I flew up hitting the dashboard, shattering my thighs. I was thrown against the windshield, smashing it, and cutting my left eye, right through the eyeball. I also ripped open my left forearm from the elbow to the wrist. But that spear of glass that penetrated my eyeball was the most serious of all. And afterwards when I became conscious in the hospital in Milwaukee, I was told that had this glass penetrated my eyeball just one-eighth of an inch further I would have been dead as it then would have pierced my brain. But the nearest I came to that morbid state was a brain concussion. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I lay in the car for half an hour until the police arrived and pried the doors open with crowbars to release me. The ambulance rushed me to the St. Francis hospital where the doctors then debated about amputating my right leg, but not consenting, they then performed surgery on it for four and one-half hours, putting in a five-inch steel plate and eight screws around my right thigh bone. Three days later they performed surgery on my left thigh bone and at which time they inserted a stainless steel rod about an inch in diameter, inside the femur bone of my left leg from the hip to knee by cutting my hip open and drilling out the hollow where the rod was to be inserted down the center of the thigh bone. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I was put in casts from hips to toes in traction where I lay in this position for a month. The cast was then taken off my left leg when physical therapy started for its benefit. When I was able to bend my left leg sufficiently the surgeons allowed me to walk on crutches supporting my bodyweight on my right leg that was still in cast. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I hobbled around on crutches and finally was allowed to go home. There I continued hobbling around on crutches for some time, and one day, I accidentally lost my balance and fell down the porch steps. This fall bent my left leg and also left thigh bone into a 45 degree angle! So back to the hospital I was taken for 17 more days under further surgery and then confined to a wheel chair for over four months. I also had to undergo further treatments for still another month and so I had to later learn to walk on crutches all over again" (Liederman).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So, after discovering dumbbells while sitting in a hospital wheelchair, this literal superman managed to put on 55 lbs of rip in seven months. He kept bulking from there, ending up at a massive but puffy 240lbs, for a total weight gain of about 80lbs in about a year and a half. From there, he cut until 210, entered his first bodybuilding contest, and crushed everyone, in a story so preposterous that by now every Redditor is subconsciously screeching the word "steroids" in spite of the fact that Redditors think my writing will make you pop positive for gear and avoid it like they do hard training. Even had the man used steroids, this story would be less believable than the one about Michael Jackson being a straight man who didn't fuck kids. Nevertheless, it is not only true, but the man was so vociferously opposed to steroids that he became the first obnoxious natty bro in bodybuilding.</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chet Yorton Vital Statistics</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Height</b>: 5'11"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Off Season Weight</b>: 210-240lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Competition Weight</b>: 215-220lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Arms</b>: 19"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Neck</b>: 18"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Chest</b>: 51½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Waist</b>: 32½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Thighs</b>: 26½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Calves</b>: 18"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>: 600lbs (competition, post automotive armageddon)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b>: 600lbs (competition)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Bench</b>: 450lbs (competition)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Olympic Total</b>: 800lbs (Clean and jerk, clean and press, and snatch)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Semi-strict Curl</b> (hips had to remain against a pole): 230lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Strict Curl</b> (with back and hips against pole: 205lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Oh yes, people, it seems natty bros have always been a pain in the ass. Although steroid use didn't carry the stigma then that it does now, Yorton railed against it like Seventh Day Adventists do against meat, fun, and fucking. Frankly, it should have been a a siren call to everyone that a literal superman who packed on 80lbs of rip right out of a fucking wheelchair in under two years of training thought the use of steroids was unfair, but instead of people taking notice of the fact superman decried them, Yorton just managed to piss everyone off to the point that he was shunned. Beyond that, he pissed off the AAU by appearing in two hilariously bad beach movies and saw his placings take a beating like a black woman who got lippy with an NFL player in a hotel lobby. And the final ingredient in the shit sandwich that was Yorton's early shit sandwich of a career? The fact that bodybuilding was about as lucrative then as powerlifting is today. As such, Yorton said, "when life gives you lemons, say 'fuck the lemons' and bail," and proceeded to use his own money to finance the first natty bro federation the NBA (Natural Bodybuilding Association), and and magazine, <i>Natural Bodybuilding</i>.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">As with anything else natty bros touch, the entire operation went to shit in short order. No one believed the competitors were natty, in spite of Yorton's wild-eyed enthusiasm for treating steroids users like heretics during the Inquisition, and the fact that the contests involved serious prize money for the time and the most stringent testing available at the time. As such, the whiny pussies of the natty world drove Yorton nearly insane with their incessant bitching and concomitant refusal to pay for anything themselves, and so Yorton sold his supplement shop, terminated the operations of the federation, and went into the antiquing business with his wife in 1982.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Arnold later said that he looked like a pile of uncooked bread dough standing next to Chet Yorton onstage, and changed both his training style and his contest preparation completely so as never to be embarrassed onstage again.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"In the middle 1960s, a number of things irked him personally and spiritually. He saw a destructive trend rise in Southern California as steroids took a grasp on the field. He also noted large areas of what he considered immoral conduct on the part of many top bodybuilders who seemingly sold themselves to the highest bidder for sexual favors to earn a non-laborious livelihood, so that their training would not suffer. In that framework, he also noted number of political intrigues that occurred within the organization governing bodybuilding contests" (Roach 271).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In other words, he didn't like the was shit was run, went his own way, and the world went against him... mostly because natty bros don't even trust each other and do little else than accuse everyone of being on steroids all the time. Nevertheless, this is a guy who managed to intuitively concoct a program that allowed him to put on 55lbs while shrinking his waist 3" in two years, and produced one of the sickest physiques in an era that was filled with them. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Speaking of an era filled with sick physiques, Yorton was sanctioned by the AAU (in a bout of fuckery that would make even the limpest micropenises in the IPF hard as the gumdrops they resemble) for appearing in the movie <i>Muscle Beach Party</i> with the superstar ensemble of Mr Olympia Larry Scott, <a href="http://shueycustom.com/">champion gunsmith and Mr. America Gene Shuey</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/who-fuck-says-you-have-to-squat-steve.html">Steve Merjanian</a>, Dan "Grizzly Adams" Haggerty, and bodybuilder and sword and sandal actor Peter Lupus, which resulted in lower placing than he should have received in the AAU Southern California and Mr California and made Yorton more bitter than an incel at a Valentines Day singles party. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhao9-oftzMdklF6elmwjPQzF17V8trsPTqejo36j2PIs8mgJLcLe45I7HonzOoQrBiU-_fmYci8AbAYHDtsGUwowtMjPQUe4gKwsD2nE0_GQTx4lP8zN_-gq820gDfIOmeRAnG7WuI_IOR/s1600/Chuck-Ahrens-Triceps.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="580" data-original-width="476" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhao9-oftzMdklF6elmwjPQzF17V8trsPTqejo36j2PIs8mgJLcLe45I7HonzOoQrBiU-_fmYci8AbAYHDtsGUwowtMjPQUe4gKwsD2nE0_GQTx4lP8zN_-gq820gDfIOmeRAnG7WuI_IOR/s1600/Chuck-Ahrens-Triceps.png" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Chet Yorton, occasional training partner of Chuck Ahrens, describing the vast difference between the modern attention whore and the dudes of his era who actually enjoyed lifting: </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"Chuck [Ahrens] never cared about competing. He just liked lifting for himself. It wasn't uncommon. I have encountered a number of athletes over the years who could have competed in powerlifting or bodybuilding and when approached to do so, they just say 'naa' and shrug it off" (Roach 274).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Yorton had the good luck to train alongside some of the biggest names of the late 50s and early 60s, but all of the lifters at that time had entirely different takes on training. As such, Olympic weightlifters shared training methods and trained with proto-powerlifters and bodybuilders, and their training methods would adapt and evolve over time to reflect the environment in which they were developed and the best practices the lifters had learned in those places. Yorton was no different. Although he was well known for doing a bizarre workout consisting of sets of 22 reps, he utilized everything from six days of training a week to one session every five days. The following is his contest prep program, which he did in a two days on, one day off schedule. Day one was push, day two was pull and squat, and day three was off, and he'd repeat that ad nauseam until the day of the contest.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsVPNZrFvY6Sh8ajw6-bjSkn_MtDAFK6IGX1-sZ5979t52QuE_485LGXmTkreqpsacJuFbG6VqzOPoXFQP8RLydBH0Usbezvh0CgS-MluHhXeco9KLPhAiq8p4sLiad9GoXcip2eQM1U0w/s1600/download.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="277" data-original-width="182" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsVPNZrFvY6Sh8ajw6-bjSkn_MtDAFK6IGX1-sZ5979t52QuE_485LGXmTkreqpsacJuFbG6VqzOPoXFQP8RLydBH0Usbezvh0CgS-MluHhXeco9KLPhAiq8p4sLiad9GoXcip2eQM1U0w/s1600/download.jpeg" /></span></a></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Contest Prep Program (2 Days On, 1 Day Off)</span></u></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Day 1: Chest, Shoulders and Triceps</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- As many sets as necessary until you reach 100 reps total, then 1 rep max. Chet usually did 5 sets of 22 with 315 and then a max single. On these and every other set, Chet went to failure.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Lateral Raise</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Bent-over Lateral Raise</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Overhead Press</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Front Raise</b>- 5 x 8-10 </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Triceps Pushdowns</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zLKiGBMxLA">Reverse Grip Dips</a></b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>One-Arm French Press</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Triceps Kickbacks</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Incline Crunches</b>- 500 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Leg Raises</b>- 500 reps</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiVoiQ6A6KRhkbmZzs2CpFjGs-jL8t77aeTgo5yEhxpSfFL_S94GN3oXKX5vCNqrHIVHd-ri4iNsU9-rFZbRbXeOifATMJ8JTSsYXSMcZEo3D-6PDKEwyxlSzVPr6HoOsTVJY8rgrmB5Zy/s1600/68d3e7d823e6fb29d3454be5833b4784.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="576" data-original-width="448" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiVoiQ6A6KRhkbmZzs2CpFjGs-jL8t77aeTgo5yEhxpSfFL_S94GN3oXKX5vCNqrHIVHd-ri4iNsU9-rFZbRbXeOifATMJ8JTSsYXSMcZEo3D-6PDKEwyxlSzVPr6HoOsTVJY8rgrmB5Zy/s1600/68d3e7d823e6fb29d3454be5833b4784.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I've had the good fortune to have been around some top bodybuilders in my time, but I've rarely seen one as perfectly proportioned and "finished" as he was. And, this was well past his competition years. Not to be cliche, but he looked like a statue. Most photos of him I've seen don't do him justice. He was far from huge (I would guess he weighed 190-200 or so), but *everything* was in perfect proportion, separated, and cut. I swear, no need to add or subtract an ounce anywhere. The finish to his physique had that very rare quality reminiscent of a thoroughbred horse or large cat. I don't want to overstate this too much, but unlike a lot of bodybuilders before or since, a build like that looks like it was made by the hand of God rather than Man - everything went together that well. Arnold, Dave, Pearl, Zane and very few others I can think of fall into that category. He posed to "Exodus" or one of those really inspiring pieces. It was outstanding. I won't forget it. The crowd went wild (Luttrell).</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Tuesdays- Back, Biceps and Legs</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Behind the Neck Pulldowns</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Wide-Grip Rows</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Reverse-Grip Rows</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>One-Arm Dumbbell Rows</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curls</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Concentration Curls</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Seated Alternating Dumbbell Curls</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Standing Dumbbell Curls</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Squats</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Hack Squats</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Leg Curls</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Leg Extensions</b>- 5 x 8-10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Standing Calf Raises (Toes pointed straight)</b>- 5 x 40</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Standing Calf Raises (Toes pointed out)</b>- 5 x 40</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Standing Calf Raises (Toes pointed in)</b>- 5 x 40</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Incline Crunches</b>- 500 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Leg Raises</b>- 500 reps</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghcjB4N1RjyixQ1D8s8wWpXAs5DKTM93ATiDffKVh5ugNdpcjLZDSujEcaX1v-5ezAwsvQjEUnKLhiE-2cMvpMcvanZFId8vsMC2bLY6_2SE8CEVUXa4g1gwHP93-LsFk5AGuEUy7ocRl9/s1600/95265634984.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="434" data-original-width="604" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghcjB4N1RjyixQ1D8s8wWpXAs5DKTM93ATiDffKVh5ugNdpcjLZDSujEcaX1v-5ezAwsvQjEUnKLhiE-2cMvpMcvanZFId8vsMC2bLY6_2SE8CEVUXa4g1gwHP93-LsFk5AGuEUy7ocRl9/s1600/95265634984.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I will never forget the tense, prolonged time it took during the prejudging posedown before the decision was announced. As I sat studying each contestant while they moved from pose to pose, two or three British judges were behind me making their decision. I heard them all agree that it was Chet Yorton’s calves that gave him the edge over Arnold; <b>so Yorton won by a pair of larger, better developed calves</b>" (Grimek).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b style="text-decoration-line: underline;">Off Season Program</b> (Done around every five days)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>- 2 x 22</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Overhead Press</b>- 2 x 22</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b>- 2 x 22</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 2 x 22 (1x22x225; 1x22x325)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If the above program blows your fucking mind, it should- even famed strength coach Bill Starr was in disbelief about it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"The most unusual program I ever saw for a bodybuilder belonged to Chet Yorton when we trained together at the old Muscle Beach Gym in Santa Monica. He did four exercises for two sets of 22 reps. How he came up with that grouping of numbers I’ll never know, but it worked perfectly for him. Not only did he have one of the most impressive physiques I have ever encountered, but he was extremely strong as well, maybe the strongest of the lot. For example, he would use 225 for his first set of benches, then jump 100 pounds and do 22 reps with 325. I know that because I handed off and spotted him. I seriously doubt whether another bodybuilder—or strength athlete for that matter—in the world could duplicate such a feat. And he weighed just over 200 pounds. </span></blockquote>
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<u><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It was a routine he specifically designed to fit his needs. </span></u></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><b>The majority of the population in this country is very much like the characters in Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World. Not quite that extreme, of course, although similar in many respects. Everything should be done in a precise, orderly fashion, and when that happens, they’re happy without having to think about it. Take some Soma if things get hectic. If there are problems, others will provide the answers. As a result, we as a nation have become dependent on others’ expertise and take few steps to become independent</b> [Emphasis mine]" (Starr).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3zGqVIRAK6SV_Be-mjIedU8cMaWrhzOvpO5hIZ1ERLGJa_hUK3CmBRb7ondiICXjHRN_eOZaByI7Yi3X5s6UHPtF7vYVB8J36vdxhB6repLGKzSLLvINLOIxqU121Wa45ByYPiQT7A-__/s1600/3a8d22281378863fdaa3ceb92d1f84d7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="666" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3zGqVIRAK6SV_Be-mjIedU8cMaWrhzOvpO5hIZ1ERLGJa_hUK3CmBRb7ondiICXjHRN_eOZaByI7Yi3X5s6UHPtF7vYVB8J36vdxhB6repLGKzSLLvINLOIxqU121Wa45ByYPiQT7A-__/s1600/3a8d22281378863fdaa3ceb92d1f84d7.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And speaking of independence, let's mention the diet the oh-so-learned natty bros of the internet claim cannot possibly be used to good effect by anyone who doesn't "eat clen and tren hard"- a borderline ketogenic diet. When training hard, Yorton ate six times a day and drank a boatload of beer, though he'd cut it to three and less beer if he was trying to lean out. According to Earle Liederman, Yorton ate no salt or other seasonings when dieting hard, nothing that might be constituted of delicious, delicious carbohydrates. Instead, Yorton preemptively took a massive shit on the dietary stylings of the alleged genius science bros like Mike Israetel and stayed yacked as fuck and lean on:</span><br />
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<u><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Breakfast</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">6-8 eggs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2 glasses of raw milk with protein powder and brewer's yeast</span><br />
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<u><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lunch</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1lb rare ground beef</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Vegetables and a gelatin salad</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2 glasses of raw milk with protein powder and brewer's yeast</span><br />
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<u><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dinner</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">1lb of liver, chicken or steak, or occasionally fish</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Lots of vegetables and a salad, and as usual soybean powder</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">2 glasses of raw milk with protein powder and brewer's yeast</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Essentially, Yorton's physique belied the fact that the polar opposite of the way a modern natty bro would recommend. He ate too much protein and too few carbs, trained way too much, drank too much, and likely fucked and cursed and was generally far more awesome than those humorless, useless fuckwits would ever consider being. According to one first hand account, Yorton blew minds with his eating, training, and physique wherever he went.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"I spent some time with Chet immediately after his Mr. Universe win in London, the day after I drove him North for 4 hours to promote his posing appearance in a show in Manchester. We had some fun on the way when we stopped to ea , a large group of people gathered round the car peering in. Chet was carrying his Mr. Universe trophy and expressed surprise that so many of the public (for that time) knew about bodybulding, what he didn't realize was that he was sat in the first Ford Mustang to be imported into Britain and was quite an eye-stopper! </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Once we were inside, the chef came running into the cafe to see who had ordered an 8 egg omelette! At 9pm that evening Chet was concerned that he hadn't had a workout for about 5 days with travelling and wanted to look well for his posing display the next day so I took him to my gym and he worked out for over 3 hours. By this time it had turned midnight and all the while he was worried that my wife might have gone to bed without leaving us some food. Not to worry she left all kinds of cold meats: ham, beef, chicken, eggs, tuna, salad, whole wheat bread - a whole tableful of food. I had a fairly normal plateful and Chet scarfed the rest and believe me I've never seen anyone eat as much food- he didn't leave a crumb! </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">That was at about 1am and off we went to bed. Next morning my wife asked what he would like for breakfast and Chet said he would like a tuna fish omelette if we had any more left. She confirmed that we had a tin in the fridge but then Chet sheepishly admitted that he had been up earlier and feeling like a snack had eaten it" (Sweeney).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzdRv7Vsft-CSHKZVkAxz9JtqiL0WXtop77A3EFN0ursRMmnWfdi0aJZZyC_CgdHMc46Dtm0SgtvcfJmDG_xbAKXlweI3kcLw1VDsZyZNvkKITKQ_4-rf0RaNvyJXAw_LKa5ssTAGr8Exp/s1600/chet+yort+67.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="656" data-original-width="876" height="479" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzdRv7Vsft-CSHKZVkAxz9JtqiL0WXtop77A3EFN0ursRMmnWfdi0aJZZyC_CgdHMc46Dtm0SgtvcfJmDG_xbAKXlweI3kcLw1VDsZyZNvkKITKQ_4-rf0RaNvyJXAw_LKa5ssTAGr8Exp/s640/chet+yort+67.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dude still looked a beast at 67, and had this to say when he hit 70:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">"The first seventy years were easy, but the next seventy are going to be a bitch."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The takeaways from this man's life and training career are simple. One, throw your fucking program out the window and figure out how best to train for you. Spit on the overpaid coach you thought you needed because you didn't know better, laugh at the dipshits on the internet who regard programming as some magical compilation of formulae that will unlock the secrets to strength, and forge your own fucking path. And two, stay the fuck away from natty bros. The only thing that could beat Chet Yorton was the relentless negativity of the natty bros and their endless witch hunts to root out all traces of awesome in their midst. You want to be natty? That's all well and good. Shut the fuck up about it, don't waste your time debating the nattiness of others, and train your goddamned ass off. The time you spend doing that shit is far better spent training, eating, or getting a nut off, because I think we can all agree that the internet's natty community is one of the most intolerable, unfuckable bunch of dickheads this side of ISIS.</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Honor Chet Yorton today- bully a natty bro into suicide.</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I don't care how they do it, so long as they're dead.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Source:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Chet Yorton Workout Routine. RippedEr. Web. 15 Dec 2018. <a href="http://rippeder.com/content/chet-yorton-workout-routine">http://rippeder.com/content/chet-yorton-workout-routine</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Grimek, John. Unforgettable Moments. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 7 Dec 2008. Web. 14 Dec 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/12/unforgetable-moments-john-grimek.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/12/unforgetable-moments-john-grimek.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Liederman, Earle. The incredible story of Chester Yorton. Strength and Health. Sep 1964:64. Web. 16 Dec 2018. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://web.archive.org/web/20160402135255/www.musclememory.com/showArticle.php?sh640942">https://web.archive.org/web/20160402135255/www.musclememory.com/showArticle.php?sh640942</a> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Luttrell, Bill. Chet Yorton Memory. Dave Draper. Web. 15 Dec 2018. </span><br />
<a href="https://www.davedraper.com/chet-yorton.html"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">https://www.davedraper.com/chet-yorton.html</span></a><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Marshall, Matt. The boring but big training program from the man who out muscled Arnold. Muscle and Brawn. 18 Apr 2010. Web. 15 Dec 2018. <a href="http://muscleandbrawn.com/boring-but-big-training-program-the-man-who-out-muscled-arnold/">http://muscleandbrawn.com/boring-but-big-training-program-the-man-who-out-muscled-arnold/</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Roach, Randy. <i>Muscle, Smoke, and Mirrors. Vol II</i>. Bloomington, AuthorHouse, 2011.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Schwarzenegger, Arnold. <i>Total Recall</i>. New York: Simon and Shuster, 2012.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Scott, Larry. Instinctive training. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 5 Aug 2014. Web. 15 Dec 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2014/08/instinctive-training-larry-scott.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2014/08/instinctive-training-larry-scott.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Speyrer, Steve. <i>Classic Anatomy Bodybuilding</i>. Self published, 1993.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Starr, Bill. No brain, no gain. Iron Man Magazine. 29 Sep 2009. Web. 15 Dec 2018. <a href="https://www.ironmanmagazine.com/no-brain-no-gain/">https://www.ironmanmagazine.com/no-brain-no-gain/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Sweeney, Bob. Chet Yorton in England. IronOnline Archive. Web. 15 Dec 2018. <a href="https://www.davedraper.com/chet-yorton-england.html">https://www.davedraper.com/chet-yorton-england.html</a></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-24396382089261143362018-12-14T12:24:00.001-05:002018-12-14T12:24:21.594-05:00Rather Important Announcement: It's Been a Decade, So I'm Changing Shit Up<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">After ten years, I will admit I am bored as shit with this site. I'm bored of the name, bored of the retro Blogger shit (though for writing it is vastly preferable to WordPress), and in mind to do something new.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">So I did it. As of Jan 1, this site is going to redirect to a new and far more brutal site. I actually hired a deathcore band graphic designer to do the logo, am getting similar artists to do other design work for the site and some merch, and will be able to monetize the site so it actually pays for itself rather than costing me money. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">All of the old shit will be available on the new site, and I'm gradually editing it all. It'll also be searchable and divided into categories. On top of that, I'll be redoing all of the recipe blogs with pics of my own creations, and I'll be greatly expanding that shit so that you guys have a repository for keto, stewroids, and bulking foods that is easy to search and navigate. Best of all, the sites that have banned Chaos and Pain won't know what's hit them when people start linking the new site.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It's the dawn of a new world order. A <b>Plague of Strength</b> is about to spread itself across the land, and it's going to be more polished, more brutal, weirder, and more awesome than the chaos and pain from which it was birthed.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><a href="https://plagueofstrength.com/">Go here if you want to bookmark it as it's being built</a>, and here's a look at the rough draft of the logo if you're into that sort of thing.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">And of course, feel free to bitch in the comments.</span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com31tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-81073442694466287982018-12-12T14:13:00.001-05:002018-12-12T15:23:05.841-05:00Maurice Jones- Pre-Steroid Era Badass who was Still Curling the 50s at 85 Years of Age<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We've all said that so-and-so looks good "for their age." It's honestly a pretty shitty thing to say, especially when most people look like shit at any age. Even taking that into account, it's rare that we see people remaining jacked as fuck into their twilight years. And I don't mean sparkly, homoerotic vegan vampires- I mean liver-spotted, young-whippersnapper-hating, welding glasses-wearing, bingo-playing twilight years. The years most of us would likely rather forgo for an epic steroids-and-cocaine-fueled bank robbery spree in our early 60s (or am I the only one who thinks that would be an epic way to go out?). In any event, most of the people on the planet are basically just a droopy pile of fat and bone at that point, so when we see a man or women who is fighting each grain of sand in the hourglass of time, they definitely stand out... and every now and again one of those people makes us all look like a bunch of sloppy, out of shape assholes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In every way possible preferable to waiting to die on a golf course.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The guys who spring to mind when you think of going down swinging against Old Man Time are people like the ageless Albert Beckles, <a href="https://generationiron.com/albert-beckles-found-fountain-youth/">who looked so preposterously good at the age of 61</a> (or 53 as the weirdly and endlessly bitter little keyboard warriors over at Getbig.com relentlessly assert) that he won the open class at the IFBB Niagara Pro Invitational; Dave Draper, one of the most epic, really, really ridiculously good-looking bodybuilders of all time and <a href="https://www.muscleandfitness.com/athletes-celebrities/news/bodybuilding-legend-dave-draper">who still looks jacked at 75</a>; Sylvester Stallone, who augmented his usual awesome physique in his 60s with <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/world/2007/mar/13/australia.usa">enough GH to supply half the Western world</a>; and Jack LaLanne, the 54 year old fitness guru who <a href="https://www.mnn.com/health/fitness-well-being/blogs/jack-lalanne-the-first-fitness-superhero">smoked a 21 year old Arnold on pullups and pushups</a>. There are plenty of other beasts of retirement age, but reading online forums or magazines, you'd think every motherfucker in the weight room needs to pretty much hang it up by age 40, and that's just not how the world works.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"I train like I'm training for the Olympics or for a Mr. America contest, the way I've always trained my whole life. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">You see, life is a battlefield. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Life is survival of the fittest. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">How many healthy people do you know? How many happy people do you know? Think about it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u>People work at dying, they don't work at living</u>. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">My workout is my obligation to life. It's my tranquilizer. It's part of the way I tell the truth — and telling the truth is what's kept me going all these years."<span style="text-align: center;"> </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">- Another aged (and now croaked) badass, Jack LaLanne</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When you see a dude or chick who is 60+ and is fucking killing it in the gym every day, rocking low bodyfat and moving serious weights, it should clue you in that 1) you're probably doing everything in your life wrong if you can't match their physique and performance, and 2) you've got a lotta mo' when it comes to time to kill shit in the gym. That's not to say you should slack now, but that what you are doing now in the gym is setting the stage for what you're going to be able to do later. Thus, if you want to do more than totter around a fucking field waving a bit of metal or wood about while participating in the lamest goddamned alleged sport on Earth, you shouldn't be reading this anyway- go play some checkers and wait to die. If you would rather be like Ellen Stein, however,<a href="https://www.girlswhopowerlift.com/blogs/blog/girls-who-powerlift-ellen-stein"> who is still crushing kids a third of her age in powerlifting and keeps getting better with age</a>, allow me to introduce you to a badass of whom I can almost guarantee you've never heard- Maurice Jones.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">My man's trap game was on a fucking <u>bean</u>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Nah- not Maurice Jones Drew, who at age 33 is now bizarrely unmuscular and fat. Maurice Jones was an American bodybuilder who was born in the same year the Titanic sunk and the first parachute jump was made... 1912, for the unhistorical among you. Though not a big dude growing up, Jones ended up one of the muscle monsters of the 1940s and 1950s, with a bodyweight that ranged between 200 and 237lbs at a height of 5'9", which according to the "scientists" in the natty bodybuilding community is an utter impossibility. So when he wasn't constructing a time machine to travel forward in time and obtain the steroids he was <i>obviously</i> taking, Maurice Jones never missed a workout in the five five years he lifted. That means that in addition to the thirty pound weighted mountain rucks he was fond of taking a couple of times a week, the dude was in the gym training six to nine hours a week with extremely short rest periods (Baptiste, Strossen). Even after that introductory half-decade, </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“I wasn’t away from them (the weights) for very lengthy periods. I valued it greatly. I always felt so much better when I would have a good workout. I stayed with it,” explains Jones. “I held a certain amount of self-pride, I was going to stick with it till the end. You know, that attitude, and I’m still doing that. I do lots of situps and press-ups between two chairs at times when weights aren’t available” (Strossen).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Fueled by the fantasy steroids envisioned by today's natty bros and a shitload of meat and potatoes, Maurice Jones absolutely mangled the weights. Lifting at a time prior to the proliferation of the squat rack, Jones started squatting heavy after reading about Milo Steinborn's epic squatting.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">“I got up into the very heavy stuff – it used to frighten me before the act. How it all came about was with Milo Steinborn: I read that he had created a world record in the deep knee bend, which I was bound and determined to break, but nobody knew anything about it. And I did get up there over 500. My memory doesn’t serve me as well as it used to, but it was around 525 pounds” (Ibid).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Nor was Jones heaving his weights about- he was well-known for having fanatical adherence to ultra-strict form, treating each lift like it was a ritual whose perfect performance would serve as a sacrifice to keep the Old Ones from destroying humanity. As bizarre as that is for a Steinborn squat, his stiff-legged deadlifts were probably even more impressive- 425lbs (and occasionally more) for 15 standing on a bench and lowering the bar until it hit the tops of his goddamned feet. And while we're at it, he would do sprints with a backpack full of plates up mountain trails. Pretty much all of the man's lifts were beastly:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Maurice Jones' Best Lifts</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.t-nation.com/videos/tip-the-steinborn-squat">Steinborn Squat</a></b>- 415lbs x 2-3 sets of 15; 450 x 10; 525 x 1 (the WR at the time was 553)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff-Legged Deadlift</b>- </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">425 x 15</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Military Press</b>- </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">215 x 12; 260 x 1</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict</b></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b> Curl</b>- 135 x 12; 175 x 1</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Curl</b>- 120 x 12; 145 x 1</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Clean and Jerk</b>- 300 or 325lbs (depending on the source) the only time he tried it, with no instruction and no warmup.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Curl-</b> 145lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwyJRPbia0vhqSDbvFiRjX6MKav9ApJNK4nlsSFkLuld7ly5mULYGywHJ8Rlp2V-OkwI0JOZITg4E2P48HLQ3RPhX7fiUcxV4V0KJzvtc73DKN4fXr5m5FDij_rPiU06FncKZLP5E0FHjt/s1600/Maurice_Jones_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="397" data-original-width="400" height="317" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwyJRPbia0vhqSDbvFiRjX6MKav9ApJNK4nlsSFkLuld7ly5mULYGywHJ8Rlp2V-OkwI0JOZITg4E2P48HLQ3RPhX7fiUcxV4V0KJzvtc73DKN4fXr5m5FDij_rPiU06FncKZLP5E0FHjt/s320/Maurice_Jones_1.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Perhaps you're thinking that my man looks thick, but not all that impressive by today's standards. Well, you're incorrect. According to the strongman nicknamed "Scottish Hercules," <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_Bankier">William Bankier</a> (who among other awesome things was the co-founder of the British Society of Jiu-Jitsu, Maurice Jones' physique was more impressive than both Eugen Sandow and George Hackenschmidt, and bodybuilder Walt Baptiste claimed there were only a couple of other men in the same class as Jones- the ultimate bodybuilding badass John Grimek, a ridiculously muscular 1940s bodybuilder of whom I'd never before heard by the name of Sam Loprinzi (who was also jacked until the day he died), and "the immortal" Eugen Sandow (Baptiste). Drink that in- this badass was held in the same esteem as the guy who is the model for trophy for the most coveted bodybuilding trophy in the world. His measurements were definitely as impressive as his lifts for the time, looking like this:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Maurice Jones' Most Muscular Measurements</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b> – 5’ 8 ½”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b> – 210lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck</b> – 18"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Chest</b> – 49 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Waist</b> – 32"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Hips</b> – 39 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Thigh</b> – 26 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf</b> – 17 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bicep</b> – 17 ¾"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Forearm</b> – 14 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist</b> – 7 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Ankle</b> – 9 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><b style="font-size: x-large;"><u>Maurice Jones' Biggest Measurements</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b> – 5’ 8 ½”</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b></span> – <span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">237lbs</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck</b> – 18"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Chest</b> – 52"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Waist</b> – 34 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Thigh</b> – 28"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bicep</b> – 18 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Forearm</b> – 14 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist</b> – 7 ¾"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf</b> – 18"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Ankle</b> – 9 ½"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And to ram another nail into the coffin of the natty bros' vaunted limits on growth, Jones once dieted down to a very lean 195 and arms were measured at just over 18" cold. So much for that bullshit about your wrist size controlling your upper arm size, eh?</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKYehRnAq9ygH9g-WeuYz6GKrRdMTYTDvU7Wb6X9qdS9uj6nSY-QflbrQEVWnXO4ppc9Y6B85D_vQVaVAzbkLr3VviCEsbgwu1CddrelyqgbdbLCOfBMPDIsn2yycgZG1_TxnvTHIc1U4f/s1600/loprinzi1946.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="800" data-original-width="428" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKYehRnAq9ygH9g-WeuYz6GKrRdMTYTDvU7Wb6X9qdS9uj6nSY-QflbrQEVWnXO4ppc9Y6B85D_vQVaVAzbkLr3VviCEsbgwu1CddrelyqgbdbLCOfBMPDIsn2yycgZG1_TxnvTHIc1U4f/s1600/loprinzi1946.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The aforementioned Loprinzi, whose physique is preposterous for 1946 and only 160lbs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">“</span><span style="font-size: large;">I’ve put up with a lot of pain over the years, years I suffered, but I never avoided my training. You can’t do it for the best part of your life and just forget it. The way I’m built, I have to continue, obviously not as strenuously as before, but I never forget it. I guess there are a lot of weight trainers and people who have done over a period of years and are still doing it.”</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>Unlike the pussies on IG and various message boards who insist that guys like Calum Von Moger should hide in their houses and do nothing but train, Jones actually got out there and did shit, and he suffered for it. Over the years the dude broke just about everything traipsing about in the mountains, and ended up having surgeries on his back neck, and both knees, among other things, but none of that shit stopped him from training heavy, cycling, climbing, or trail hiking (Strossen). At the age of 50 he was said to have the physique of a jacked 21 year old and would jog his burly 205-235lb ass along an 11 mile trail daily. Even at the age of 85, Jones weighed a solid 185, lifted three times a week, and continued all of his outdoor activities... proving simultaneously that cardio doesn't kill your gains and that you can still move weight into your old age, since he was still curling and overhead pressing the 50s for high rep sets.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMoyGd1ddIftkTJKwuFcATpvYCguQuJdHRi1tw3Jr9e08yb5LXOw96mvr4_jXSLw6xIX_K4xVzmK-5DgDv_9Io2oxxOe1d39KAeu9ZuJvj3nuLX7hohIKZwtmjQdHXfN-7_1-sB8iXVbz/s1600/one.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="305" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOMoyGd1ddIftkTJKwuFcATpvYCguQuJdHRi1tw3Jr9e08yb5LXOw96mvr4_jXSLw6xIX_K4xVzmK-5DgDv_9Io2oxxOe1d39KAeu9ZuJvj3nuLX7hohIKZwtmjQdHXfN-7_1-sB8iXVbz/s1600/one.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Asked what he’d say if a young kid came up to him and said, “Mr. Jones, do you think I should take drugs to get bigger muscles or to get stronger?”: “I would say, don’t become a fanatic, although I must have appeared that way to a lot of people. If you get fanatical about something, it spoils it. You have to recognize the line – that’s the trouble.”</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As for his workouts, we have only one sample program he offered from his older years, when his training volume had been cut down considerably. In his younger years, he and his brother were the proto-Mentzers, training as partners brutal in three hour long sessions consisting of full body workouts and jump sets. Later on, he kept the giant sets and pared down the volume and offered up this sample program, to be done three times a week.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Maurice Jones Program</u></b> (when he was in his later years)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Warmup- Calisthenics, bending, arm waving, and pushups on the steep board.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Three sets of 12 of the following, jump setted, with a minute between sets:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Military Press</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Curls</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Three sets of 12 of the following, jump setted, with a minute between sets:<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bent-over Row </b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>- 1-3 x 12</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff-Legged Deadlifts</b>- 3 x 12-15</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There were no chairs in the Jones gym because he never fucking sat down during a workout- he was no shiftless layabout. In addition to the above, there was a ton of weighted ab work, weighted hill sprints and hikes, cycling, climbing, and whatever else he wanted to do. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So there you have it- Maurice Jones, a man who lived and died so badass he likely never gave a fuck how close he was to a world record in the squat, because he'd rather rockclimb anyway. There are a ton of lessons to be learned from the man's life- Jones was only limited by time and his imagination, he didn't give a fuck about records because he was all about the journey rather than the destination, and he didn't let shit stand in his way, be it age, injuries, or anything else. Clearly, he was onto something.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">... and if that shit wasn't enough to get your ass into the gym tonight, check out this 69 year old who managed to build a better physique than anyone I know under a Communist regime and still chumps the lot of us going into his seventh decade of life.</span></span><br />
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<b>Sources:</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Baptiste, Walt. Maurice Jones, Canadian Hercules (1941). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 11 Dec 2010. Web. 10 Jul 2018. </span><a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/12/maurice-jones-canadian-hercules-by-walt.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/12/maurice-jones-canadian-hercules-by-walt.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Maurice Jones the Canadian Hercules workout routine. Rippeder. Web. 28 Nov 2018. </span><a href="http://rippeder.com/content/maurice-jones-canadian-hercules-workout-routine">http://rippeder.com/content/maurice-jones-canadian-hercules-workout-routine</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">McCallum, John. Running. Reprinted from Strength and Health Jan 1968. Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 10 Aug 2017. Web. 10 Jul 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/08/running-john-mccallum-1968.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/08/running-john-mccallum-1968.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Strossen, Randall. Maurice Jones: muscles, mountains and the man.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Milo. Mar 1997 4(4)9-12.</span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-82862659084553921152018-12-10T16:12:00.001-05:002018-12-10T16:12:30.649-05:00How Can You Save Me If You Can't Save Yourselves? Part 2.<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: helvetica neue, arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">In the first part of this bit of wild-eyed polemic, I explained that the evidence-based coaches in the strength training community are, almost to a person, liars who resemble in many ways the idiots and psychotics who espouse the Flat Earth theory. The issue, however, goes deeper than conspiracies, however. </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue", arial, helvetica, sans-serif;">The theoreticians behind the studies utilized by evidence-based training aren't eminent lifters, nor are they wild-eyed optimists with the goal of advancing the human condition- they are shills paid to promote the degenerate goals of the cabal of coaches seeking to limit the potential of neophyte lifters to validate their weaksauce training methods and excuse the lack of results they produce. Whereas the power of belief, the lack of mental limits on performance and growth, or the innate desire to achieve led us in the past to utilize training methodologies that essentially amounted to "if you believe in it, it will work," lifters now wait for "clinical evidence" to put a training method to the test rather than opening their fucking eyes and taking what is happening before them as proof of concept. The insanity and weakness driving that mentality is fucking staggering, yet most strength sports "athletes" (Crossfit and strongmen being obvious exceptions, because those motherfuckers are hellbent on superhumanity) take that shit as gospel.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"The whole machinery of the state, in all different countries, is turned on to making defenseless children believe absurd propositions the effect of which is to make them willing to die in defense of sinister interests under the impression that they are fighting for truth and right. <b> This is only one of the countless ways in which education is designed, not to give true knowledge, but to make people pliable to the will of their masters</b>."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">-Bertrand Russell</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">That's right- it is a goddamned cabal of people who have no business discussing strength manipulating people who don't know better into believing they're preordained to be weak, then tricking them into the belief that the degrees they have validate their bullshit training methods, which are designed for weak people by weak people to induce very marginal gains to ensure a never-ending income stream. And if the above quote doesn't make you want to hang one of those pussy-ass poser coaches from the nearest fucking lamppost, you are officially dead inside. The bullshit adage "those who cannot do, teach," is even less valid when it comes to strength and nutrition, because if they could truly turn anyone into a serious athlete, they likely would have started with themselves. <b>Thus, if they cannot do, they have absolutely no fucking business teaching.</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Would you take advice about street racing from a guy whose parents bought him a Ferrari or the paraplegic who built his own rat rod from the ground up?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And as to their degrees, granted from institutions of purported higher learning who are willing to have their name attached to these charlatans- they're no more meaningful than the EliteFTS shirt you have in your dresser. Does the fact they allowed you to purchase their shit mean they endorse your lifting and the beliefs you espouse? Of course not, and the degrees for which these bullshit artist coaches have paid are similarly meaningless. As Arthur Schopenhauer said:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Ordinary folk have a deep respect for professional men of every kind. They are unaware that a man who makes a profession of a thing loves it not for the thing itself, but for the money he makes by it; or that it is rare for a man who teaches to know his subject thoroughly; for if he studies as he ought, he in most cases has no time to teach it."</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In this case, studying would almost entirely consist of actual lifting, and Schopenhauer sums up my myriad issues with these pink-bitch, half-assed, witch doctor coaches who are nothing but money hungry pussies with perpetuating the weakness of others at the forefront of their minds. Shit, even when they succeed in making someone super strong, it is purely by accident, as the goal of their coaching is not the success of their lifters but the propagation of their system. As such, they don't use logic to create their methodology- their method is <i>eristic</i>. The form of the conclusion is correct, but the premises by which the conclusion is drawn are untrue, because victory in the form of sales is their sole goal.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Pissed off yet? You should be, because these coaches, reliant on tiny studies and the broad conclusions drawn from them, are fakes. Impostors. Posers. Ersatz rather than genuine. They're like Danielson at the beginning of the Karate Kid who thought he could fight after doing the exercises in those (awesome as fuck, and I owned dozens) of ridiculous karate how-to books. Imitation might be the greatest form of flattery, but in this case it's just disgusting. They're like shaved monkeys pretending to be insurance salesmen, masquerading as logical while ignoring established anecdotal fact to promote their completely illogical agendas. Their popularity, which many hold as proof of the veracity of their claims, proves nothing more than the fact that people have been lied to so much that at this point they'll believe any bullshit spouted by a limp dick in a labcoat.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">Somehow, Ernest Cadine managed to transcend his natty genetic limits and trash everyone in Olympic weightlifting all without the help of science. At 5'6" he competed at 181lbs and pulled </span><b style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">a right hand axle deadlift of 367lbs</b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">. </span><a href="https://www.tigerfitness.com/blogs/workouts/natural-bodybuilding-potential-arm-size" style="font-family: "Helvetica Neue", Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Bullshit artists like Lyle McDonald, Marc Perry, and Martin Berkham claim this to be impossible</a><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: left;">, yet it happened. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It's not even that I have anything against the concept of evidence based training, but the reality is that the scientists conducting the studies have inherent bias before beginning them and utilize them in a manner that allows them to prove faulty theories. Even if that weren't the case, their findings are in no way commensurate with the practical, hands-on knowledge in strength sports that has been compiled and refined over the history of human existence. Hell, it's not just strength sports- wouldn't you rather take advice on building furniture from a well respected carpenter or on fixing your car from an actual mechanic? Not the guys who read books about doing the shit and never successfully did either thing themselves, but the guys who have the practical, hands-on knowledge in going it? Would you want sex tips from a virgin with a PhD in human sexuality or a prostitute? For whatever reason, that sort of question is never raised in strength sports, and it should be. People are metaphorically putting their kids in a daycare run by child molesting serial killers and happily overpaying for the service, and this shit has got to come to an end, because you're better off trying to get to the moon in a rocket built by a Flat Earther than you are trying to get insanely strong and jacked using the methods of one of these evidence based asshats.</span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The glute guy, Bret Contreras, can coach you to a ridiculously subpar squat (my man squatted a hilariously low 424lbs at 242lbs as a self-proclaimed authority on the muscle group responsible for big squats) for the low, low price of $120 a month! For some perspective, my ex wife squatted 350 for a double at 135, beltless, and didn't think her lifts were in any way noteworthy... and Brett wrote a whole article excusing his shitty performance with genetics. Surprise!</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> For my money, it's far more embarrassing to pay a poser for bad lifting advice than it would be for a suburbanite to take a trap out on a date that would end up in sex. Worst case there, you were fooled by solid makeup skills and overpowered by your dick, whereas paying a fake-ass authority on strength like Contreras means you're weak, stupid, out a chunk of money, and unfucked... and if you would rather be branded stupid and weak than bisexual, I've no fucking idea how you even found this site.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; text-align: right;">Whoops. Well, I already have my pants off anyway, so...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In closing, the evidence/science/empirically-based training movement is a devious, illogical, close-minded, pretentious, and ultimately psychotic (in that the people perpetuating it are shallow and useless to the point of being mentally imbalanced) money grab that should be met with violent reprisals. The movement has ripped the soul out of two strength sports and is draining the life out of a culture that used to be about positivity (not the idiotic touchy-feely disingenuous bullshit you see in IG comments and hashtags, but rather the genuine communal desire for everyone to get bigger, better, and more jacked), because it is bereft of imagination, joy, aggression, and art. Yeah, art. Strength training is as much, if not more, art than science, and anyone who disputes this fact is either an idiot or a liar (the exceptions to this rule are again Greg Nuckols and Mike Tuscherer. Nevertheless, I contend they succeed in spite of, rather than because of, their methods). Your body is not a Betty Crocker Easy Bake oven that you can construct following step by step instructions, nor is your deadlift a cake you can follow a recipe to bake to perfection. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The Soviet system didn't produce beasts like Rigert and Alexeev- it just benefited from their existence. The rules and programs did not apply to guys like Rigert and Alexeev, who were allowed to train as they would.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It's time to take back our fucking scene and drive these false prophets of the false god of science the fuck out of strength sports. Their methodology and attitude is destroying weight lifting culture- replacing the zest for life with banality, the camaraderie with attention whoring on the internet, and the desire to transcend the human condition with a solemn vow to wallow in it. For those of you who feel like you want a coach, check out this <a href="https://www.reddit.com/r/weightroom/comments/a1o33z/jay_nera_picking_a_coach/" target="_blank">great video lecture on the subject of picking a coach</a> by Jay Nera, who is both a great lifter and a really good guy, or just ask yourself two questions when choosing one- "what have they done?" and "who have they coached?" If the answer to either is nothing or no one, find someone else, or just fucking figure it out for yourself. Picking shit up and putting it down is not all that fucking hard- if you suck at it, you're either overthinking it or not trying hard enough.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And to all of those "coaches" whose butts were hurt by this series, feel free to step up to keep your fucking rep up. Till then,</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">TALK TO THE FIST AND REST IN PISS.</span></b></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com43tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-41300574623891206092018-12-06T12:29:00.001-05:002018-12-10T16:07:20.299-05:00How Can You Save Me If You Can't Save Yourselves? Part One: 'Evidence-Based' Training Is The Strength World's Flat Earth Theory<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Vexation is the attitude of the individual as intelligence towards the check imposed upon repressing the violence of will- in other words, by virtue; or by keeping the intelligence from dwelling upon the check- in other words, by stoicism."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">-Arthur Schopenhauer</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Given the fact I coined the phrase "Violence over Virtue" and printed it on t-shirts long before reading Schopenhauer's "Essay on Controversy," and the fact I have long considered the Stoics to be the most chickenshit bunch of faux tough guys this side of Redditors, I find myself invariably and unceasingly vexed. Nowhere do I find myself more often vexed than when faced with the prospect of slapping down some pseudointellectual, pseudostrength athlete on the subject of science-based strength training and nutrition because it is akin to challenging a Young Earther who insists dinosaurs and humans coexisted on Earth in the last ten thousand years. Both belief systems are so inherently and irrevocably flawed, yet so violently, ignorantly, and dogmatically defended that rational discussion is impossible. Hilariously, both groups cite logic, reason, and "fact" as the basis for their belief systems, yet neither group possesses a modicum of the intellect or knowledge necessary to understand the idiocy of their arguments, and furthermore lack the requisite grasp of rhetoric to either win a debate on the subject or realize how utterly specious their claims are.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">How lucky, then, that I'd reread Aristotle and Schopenhauer recently, and love handing out verbal curb stomps more than Proud Boys and Trump supporters love to fantasize about having penises, the physiques of adult male humans, and handing out real curb stomps at Antifa protests!</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Behold the Great Leveller. I live my life as an outcast, and I wouldn't have it any other way.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I've always been an outsider in my own proverbial country- my writing style is considered (bizarrely to myself and anyone who knows me personally) as satirical, my diet hyper-extreme, my workout volume nigh on impossible, and in an industry where success is almost always measured by one's social circle I have none, yet I have success. Given the fact that I have been an inveterate meathead since the mid-Nineties, I have a unique perspective- I am now so deep inside lifting culture that I've tunnelled my way under and out of it, and I am now so disassociated with a community in which I should be steeped like an abattoir in blood that my life's work seems slightly gross from the taint the current incarnation of the lifting community has brought upon it. So, without going off on strength coaches in general, who hold their jumped-up Phys Ed degrees overhead while screaming overly complex jargon that belies their total lack of understanding of strength science (because if you cannot explain it easily to a child, you don't fucking understand it), I'll simply put the "evidence based" coaches on blast. Fuck it- if I cannot put them before an actual firing squad for the potentially irrevocable damage they have done to the lifting community as a whole, I might as well metaphorically gun them down in an effort to take back our fucking scene from the pussies currently flooding it.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Actually, fuck that- a firing squad is too good for these self-righteous, lying shitslugs. If we're going to take back our scene, we need to make examples, not corpses.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Extreme? Perhaps, unless you consider the fact that lifters are by and large getting weaker as they get more closeminded, all while professing to be enlightened and correct. Part of the problem lies in the fact that the people promulgating evidence-or-science based training have degrees that seem to legitimize their opinions on strength training and nutrition, but in reality they are simply posers hiding behind obtuse verbiage intended to mystify the laymen to the point that they appear as authorities. This trick is nothing new- it explains the rituals and mystique of witch doctors and shamans, and the reason Catholic priests held services in a long dead language. It's also why channers and the dickless retards who ape them vomit idiot-speak non-words all over the internet- the utilization of their "in crowd" lexicon gives them a sense of belonging and superiority so spurious and hollow that it shatters like Anderson Silva's shinbone the moment they step away from their computer into the real world.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Renowned German philosopher Arthur Schopenhauer aptly described the aforementioned style of controversial dialectic (the art of disputation that allows one to hold their own in a debate over an assertion for which there may be many proofs) as <i>sophistic</i>. The fact that Sophists basically run our scene is more than enough justification for a widespread purge, because their method is <b>the</b> method to use when the person defending it knows their conclusion is false, although it seems correct at a cursory glance. A Sophist disgustingly looks to the reputation and money they'll gain by promoting a falsehood rather than using <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_priori_and_a_posteriori" target="_blank"><i>a priori</i> or <i>a postiori</i></a> logic to arrive at the correct answer and promote that. Not unlike the progenitor of the Flat Earth Theory, Samuel Rowbotham (who did not actually believe the world was flat- he just needed the money his lectures brought in to support his ridiculous number of children), science-based exercise "scientists" sell their souls for money and lead people to an easy untruth to provide a salve to their bruised egos. "Science-based" training is nothing more than shitty training methodologies rooted in a conspiracy theory, only rather than blaming the Rosicrucians or shapeshifting alien lizards, the science-based community blames steroids for all super-strength and all fantastic physiques. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Think I'm off base?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Though imagining shadowy cabals behind every corner might seem scary, conspiracy theories also seem to offer believers the promise of control in the form of knowledge and insight that others lack, Douglas said. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">'You have a need for security and control, and you don't have it, she said, 'so you try to compensate for it. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Finally, conspiracy theories can give believers a self-esteem boost and allow them to feel good about the groups they belong to. Some studies suggest narcissism and conspiracy belief are linked, Douglas said, and many conspiracies divide the world into "good guys" (e.g., the moral YouTube star setting out to find the truth) and "bad guys" (e.g., the government, or a given ethnic group)" (Pappas).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">... by harnessing the full magical power of steroids.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The natty and evidence-based movements go hand in hand, and they vilify users of various performance enhancing drugs as "cheats," then claim that anyone who falls outside of the acceptable range of performance must be a user of those drugs (the list of which changes daily). This, then, justifies the lack of progress that the adherents to these belief systems have had, and provides them which their desired self esteem boost. Rather than blaming their methods and efforts for average gains and performance, evidence-based natty bros blame the raw material of their biology and genetics- their insertion placement and physical structure, their metabolism, their fat deposition, or anything other than themselves and their shitty coaches. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Unfortunately, once a conspiracy belief is established, it's hard to change, said Swami; people tend to hold on to their beliefs. Arguments and discussions only tend to entrench those beliefs, as people tend to engage in what's called "psychological reactance," Swami said, spending time honing their own arguments and convincing themselves even further of their own rightness" (Pappas).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Frankly, we don't have to stop the conspiracy- we can just watch that fad die and hope the people promoting it die with them, in a vast conflagration that engulfs the weak of mind, body, and spirit. Or we can just crash one of their conferences and beat them to death with weights they could never hope to lift. Whichever works. Frankly, we should start with Lyle McDonald and his fans, as that lazy former dickrider of Dan Duchaine, who came on the scene completing that man's work after his death, has now turned his back on all of his former research and position (and in doing so fully spitting in the face of the man who put him on the map in the first place) in the quest for the almighty dollar. Being that McDonald has done nothing and coached no one, he realized his utter lack of credentials place him in the perfect position to coach the uncoachable natty shitbirds of the internet, since the fact that they grew up without <i>Choose Your Own Adventure</i> books left them wholly incapable of separating fact from fiction and choosing between similar options and they want to be told they're special and everything is going to be alright because everyone who outperforms them is a "cheater." Yeah, well, that dog just won't fucking hunt... but these idiots are so weak, slow, and stupid that hunting them is easier than hunting the dodo, and given that McDonald is an apparently violent autist, starting with him is simply doing the world a service before he angrily drives his parents' car into a crowd of people because he can't get laid.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Dan Duchaine would likely be thinking this is a fitting end for little Lyle, because that pussy motherfucker stabbed a far better man's corpse in the fucking back.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you're shocked, don't be- this shit should have happened a long time ago. I'm not just some dark-souled avenger who's decided to descend upon a community of hapless, pious hypocrites in a random feat of rage- I'm a pure, ferocious product of a culture that has been usurped by know-nothing, bitch-made pussies in capri pants who have every fucking bit of this vitriol coming to them. And the reason for this vitriol is simple- anyone who started training prior to the advent of the internet is very well aware that sports science is decades behind the bro knowledge you'll find in the gym, and anyone with a modicum of sense and the ability to look impartially at the two will note that this is obvious. Immediately obvious. Even beyond that, for millennia gym bros have been doing what sport scientists claim is impossible for drug free athletes- for instance, Greek trireme rowers routinely outperformed the efforts of our most elite modern rowers (our elite can only row 70% as fast), and both <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/06/science-is-liar-sometimes-and-this-is.html" target="_blank">sumo and Indian pehwani easily exceed and have exceeded for hundreds of years the lean body mass of modern drug free bodybuilders</a>, and how it seems from my observation that practically everyone who has ever lifted weights seriously has outperformed the skinny dipshits in their fancy workout gear following "evidence-based" programs (Pain)... </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Ah, how I love fisting these motherfuckers with the long arm of truth.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Which leads me to wonder how they expect to save anyone from weakness if they cannot save themselves? Shit, they can't even save themselves from the logical fallacy that their systems are based on studies so limited in scope that they're statistically insignificant, whereas "bro-science" is based on literally hundreds of years of observational evidence. As such, the statements made by "eminent" authors who should be teaching fucking kickball to snot covered toddlers rather than bloviating about their bullshit, "science-based" training theories are <i>ad rem</i> false- their propositions are not in accordance with the nature of things. They claim that the innumerable examples one might provide are either outliers, the produce of science experiments of ancient aliens, pure fiction, evil, nefarious drug users, or other assorted poppycock, <b>simply because the existence of those things doesn't fit their belief system</b>. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If Brando had lived to see the evidence-based training bullshit of the internet, he would have laughed his fucking ass off rereading his own quote, because it was incredibly apt.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Funny how that is in no way scientific, eh? And I have just begun, people- more reasons to pelt those evidence-based faux coaches with brickbats coming soon. The exceptions to this polemic are</span> Greg Nuckols and Mike Tuscherer, who if not captivating writers can actually move weight and read- if I had to guess, their similar methods suit their Spock-like temperaments, which allows him to succeed in ways few can.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Sources:</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Pain, Stephanie. When men were gods. The New Scientist. 7 Feb 2007. Web. 6 Dec 2018. <a href="https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19325902-200-histories-when-men-were-gods/">https://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19325902-200-histories-when-men-were-gods/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Pappas, Stephanie. Flat Earth: What fuels the internet's strangest conspiracy theory? LiveScience. 5 Feb 2018. Web. 30 Nov 2018. <a href="https://www.livescience.com/61655-flat-earth-conspiracy-theory.html">https://www.livescience.com/61655-flat-earth-conspiracy-theory.html</a></span></span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-88666398337020493372018-12-04T17:38:00.000-05:002018-12-05T13:00:20.323-05:00Feast, Famine, And Ferocity Diet, Part 3- And Now We FEAST<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Feasting, loosely defined as the public consumption of an elaborate meal often accompanied by entertainment, is a feature of most ancient and modern societies. Hayden and Villeneuve recently defined feasting as 'any sharing of special food (in quality, preparation or quantity) by two or more people for a special (not everyday) event'" (Hirst).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Certainly a couple of weeks of protein sparing modified fasting qualifies as a special event, and not just because eating anything at the end of a fortnight of hunger will be glorious- at this point, your body is wringing every last bit of nutrition out of every calorie you consume, and your metabolism is a ravening beast straining at the chains that bind it. Well, now is the time to throw off those chains and write an ode of sweat and blood on the floor of your gym. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Tradition dictates that a major feast would last about two weeks in pre-Christian western societies, and during those times there would be a hell of a lot of partying and a hell of a lot of eating in addition to epic feats of strength and athletic competition. Will their bellies full of meat and booze, people would decide that they needed to prove who was the biggest badass in the room, and they would set out to do so. Whether this meant seeing <a href="https://www.businessinsider.com/hafthor-bjornsson-breaks-viking-strength-record-2015-2" target="_blank">how far they could carry a ship's mast</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2012/10/how-i-learned-to-stop-worrying-and-love.html" target="_blank">lift heavy stones</a>, wrestle, race, or even do<a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2012/10/how-i-learned-to-stop-worrying-and-love.html" target="_blank"> crazy-ass weighted situps</a> like the Indians do when they're not chugging ghee, that meant there were more varied and impressive feats of strength than you would find on Festivus in the Costanza house. As such, it is time to seriously get your lift on.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Before you get down to the business of chumping your friends in the gym and generally acting like the most vicious iron warlord in history, displaying strength that causes grown men to weep and fertile women to conceive simply from being in your presence, you've gotta eat. In a stark departure from what you're used to, what you eat here matters far less than how much you eat. That's right- after you hit your body's protein requirements, the macronutrient profile of what you're eating isn't precisely insignificant, but matters less than you would think (</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Rozenek). This might explain, then, why Senegalese and Indian wrestlers are far more muscular than the macronutrient profile breakdown of their diets might indicate. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilsDLzNV0KEheLl5xXABD_AJ9y7GFOydt9tnf5ECc7-xRPRr2QOBjJO08lvb5C_Ukia4Lz-eyHAjM3vXk1JQ-J5miEwl4LYU8TbTmjxNfutxT43CVSnvAS7QfKSaRry6yrRaOQ1i6mUbDf/s1600/wrestling__square.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="471" data-original-width="620" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEilsDLzNV0KEheLl5xXABD_AJ9y7GFOydt9tnf5ECc7-xRPRr2QOBjJO08lvb5C_Ukia4Lz-eyHAjM3vXk1JQ-J5miEwl4LYU8TbTmjxNfutxT43CVSnvAS7QfKSaRry6yrRaOQ1i6mUbDf/s1600/wrestling__square.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">That level of muscularity on a guy who's never seen a gym and never had a protein shake makes me wonder what in the fuck I have been doing with my life. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Like sumo, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/06/science-is-liar-sometimes-and-this-is.html" target="_blank">who if you've forgotten carry more natty muscle than gassed up pro bodybuilders</a>, and Indian pehlwani, Senegalese laamb fighters focus more on carbohydrates than protein when they're making meals (Men's Health), which cuts down on the cost of bulking and makes the experience a bit easier from an eating perspective as well. Now that science has finally caught up to the reality in which we've already been living, perhaps the internet will finally take notice- <b>getting big and lifting big requires eating big</b>. And if you're worried about getting a little fat, don't- even people in studies who don't lift and </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">shovel down enough food at the Chinese buffet to make it look like they were setting up for the Gluttony death in Se7en 2</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> have weight gain that is at worst equal amounts of fat and muscle and often a 2:1 ratio of muscle to fat </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">(Forbes, Jebb)</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. This is due to marked increases in </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">IGF-1, testosterone, and insulin, all of which mean fucking gainz. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-large;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">The Feast Diet</u> </span><span style="font-size: large;">(4 weeks)</span></span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Multiply your bodyweight by 20 for total daily calories</b> (if you're feeling like you want to go <i>seriously</i> big, go with 25 calories. Halfthor goes with a minimum of 27)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Ensure at least 35% of your calories are protein</b></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Eat whatever the fuck you want thereafter</b></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">There is nothing magical going on here- the weight of the human experience supports the idea that you're going to pack on mass like you're getting ready to stand in for the Hulk in the next Avengers flick. Bear in mind when you're making food choices that not all macros are created equal. I'm not suggesting you need to eat like a 1990's bodybuilder and just shovel down boatloads of brown rice and boiled chicken, but know for a certainty that 1000 calories of candy corn will likely not yield the same metabolic advantages of, say, a diet of human livers and blood sausage. Use your fucking head here, and remember that the guys around the world who are jacked as hell without the benefit of modern training aids and refrigeration got that way mostly using the power of stew. Icelandic strongmen <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2013/08/stew-roids-like-muthafucka.html?zx=55812914c53fad32" target="_blank">still use it</a>, as do the aforementioned<a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2013/08/theres-no-such-thing-as-too-many-stew.html" target="_blank"> Senegalese wrestlers</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2013/08/stew-roids-for-win.html" target="_blank">Indian wrestlers</a>, and <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2013/08/stew-roids-like-muthafucka.html?zx=55812914c53fad32" target="_blank">sumo</a>, and they all credit stews for their heavy musculature and freakish strength.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In addition to stone lifting, the Tahitians actually compete yearly in a fruit carrying race. No, I am not making this up- a 2km foot race carrying 30kg of fruit. Given that they only thing kids are competing in these days is fucking Fortnite, a fruit race wearing a skirt and a garland of leaves seems insanely badass.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Polynesians also eat a hell of a lot of stew in the form of <i>fafa</i>, and they're some of the largest and most terrifying people on the planet. Though their <i>fafa</i> is cooked in a badass underground oven called a <i>hima'a</i>, <i>fafa</i> is so easy to make on the stove I feel like I'm going to develop a sick tan and grow six inches just from reading the recipe.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">Tahitian Chicken Fafa</span> (<a href="https://www.geniuskitchen.com/recipe/chicken-fafa-215635" target="_blank">Source</a>)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Ingredients</u> (4 servings)</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 tablespoon butter</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1/4 cup chopped onion</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">2 cloves garlic, minced</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 cup coconut milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">2 cups water</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 1/2 cups uncooked long grain white rice</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 pound skinless, boneless chicken breast halves - cut into 1 inch pieces</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 (10 ounce) package frozen chopped spinach, thawed and drained</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1/3 cup shredded coconut</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Directions</u> (and holy hell is this easy to make):</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In a large, deep skillet over medium-high heat, melt the butter. Stir in the onion and garlic, and cook 2 minutes. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Mix in the coconut milk, water, rice, and chicken, and bring to a boil. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer 20 minutes, until rice is tender and chicken juices run clear.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Stir the spinach into the skillet, and cook just until heated through. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Sprinkle with coconut, and serve.</span></li>
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<u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Nutrition</span></u><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Per Serving: 599 calories; 23.2 g fat; 66.2 g carbohydrates; 32.1 g protein.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Dunno about you guys, but I would like to live in a place that had random stone lifting competitions for shits and giggles. No fucking participation trophy, no membership cards, no nonsense- just a few people who wanted to see who could pick up the heaviest rock and then eat like they escaped a concentration camp.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And this next recipe doesn't really have any cool origin beyond the fact that I absolutely love smoked meats and <a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01JGF97D0/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1" target="_blank">keep my smoker popping all the time</a>. If you have any interest in quick and easy smoked meats, there is no shame whatsoever in owning an electric smoker- they're quick, easier to operate than half of the microwaves on the planet, <u style="font-weight: bold;">and they make smoked fucking meats</u>. There is really only one reason not to have one, and that is just sucking worse than anyone ever has... or you live in an apartment with no balcony. There is no fire, so rules against grills don't apply. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Barbecue is pretty much ubiquitous across the world, but the US definitely has a culture of smoking meats that exists nowhere else in the world. Because other countries don't smoke meat as much, or you might not have a smoker, or you're just lazy, I've got a couple of ways to do this recipe, including one with a biscuit topping (which is banging) and one that is a shepherd's pie. However you make this fucking thing, it will both taste amazing and put meat on your bones. </span>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><b style="font-size: x-large;">Pulled Pork Pot Pie </b>(not sure of the source- I saved this awhile ago)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><u>Pulled Pork</u></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You've got three options: </span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Drop 3 lbs of pork shoulder in a crock pot for 8 hours with 1/2 a bottle of your favorite BBQ sauce (I combine a shitload of Dave's Insanity sauce and Whole Foods 365 Texas barbecue sauce).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Rub 3 lbs of pork shoulder with spicy mustard, then coat generously with Bad Byron's Butt Rub and pop it in the smoker at 225 degrees for 6 hours (2 hours per pound). The meat's internal temp should be between 195 and 201 degrees (hotter for softer pork). Then pull the meat and add sauce if you want.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.thespruceeats.com/oven-pulled-pork-barbecue-3059506" target="_blank">Make the pork in the oven</a>. </span></li>
</ol>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Crust</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The easy way: buy pie dough from the store.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The less easy way (which really isn't hard, and being able to make a banging pie crust will definitely come in handy at some point in your life):</span></span><br />
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 1/4 c flour</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1/2 t salt</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1/2 c cold butter, cubed</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1/4 c ice water</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Mix flour and salt. Cut in butter with a pastry knife (or fork if you don't have one) until the texture of rice. Add ice water one teaspoon at a time, mixing until a stiff dough forms. Roll that into a ball and smash between two layers of saran wrap. Place that in the freezer for four hours. This makes a top crust only. Double recipe for two crusts, freezing two balls of dough. When chilled, roll out pie crust between the saran wrap layers, to fit the pie pan.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Pie Filling</b></u></span></span><br />
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 can each of corn and peas, drained</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">2 carrots, peeled and sliced thin</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">2 potatoes microwaved for four minutes, diced</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 packet chicken gravy</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">1 1/4 lb of your pulled pork</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When cooking gravy mix, add carrots to the pan to soften in hot gravy. If making double crusts, line pie pan with one crust. Layer filling ingredients in pan, pour gravy over top. Top pie with the second crust, pressing the edges onto pan (or bottom crust) to seal edges and prevent leaking. Cut steam vents in top crust. Bake on a cookie pan to catch leaks at 425 degrees F for 45 minutes, or until the crust is golden brown.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">To top with biscuits, <a href="https://www.pillsbury.com/recipes/pulled-pork-biscuit-pot-pie/a2d60eb0-7983-4648-8a01-c2c5ab21e35c" target="_blank">use Pillsbury's recipe</a>.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">To make as a Shepherd's Pie, <a href="https://www.theblackpeppercorn.com/2013/11/pulled-pork-shepherds-pie/" target="_blank">go here</a>.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Any way you make that, the result is going to be a fuckload of quality calories that taste amazing and travel well.</b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3oKKx4ZEkEg3rWiJqGoCvnGqmvrhppEZ3dDfgu8HSm1CLT_j1uR4kcZFErJIGRALuSjx1tM8FXiO_3sV-86S6TwTGUOnzfcpkevCWy1317F9IshirWZGuo0R1hmbRKBl6EJMAYHQ_iRV0/s1600/rory_leidelmeyer_34566467_265966763978886_3944552416241778688_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1350" data-original-width="1080" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3oKKx4ZEkEg3rWiJqGoCvnGqmvrhppEZ3dDfgu8HSm1CLT_j1uR4kcZFErJIGRALuSjx1tM8FXiO_3sV-86S6TwTGUOnzfcpkevCWy1317F9IshirWZGuo0R1hmbRKBl6EJMAYHQ_iRV0/s640/rory_leidelmeyer_34566467_265966763978886_3944552416241778688_n.jpg" width="512" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Not only did Rory Leidelmeyer like to hang dong in the gym in broad daylight, but he ate 7000-8000 calories a day to fuel his heavy-as-a fat-broad-facesitting-a-midget workouts.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u style="font-weight: bold;">The Feast Program</u> </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">(4 weeks)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The logic here is simple- you're going to lift so heavy and brutally that if you were participating in an orgy filled with obese people at an Acacia Strain concert, you'd... I have no idea where I was going with that. The first exercise in every workout is all about strength, and the remainder is about hypertrophy. As everyone already knows, both are getting worked all the time, but the primary focus is maximal strength and then hypertrophy, respectively. As with the Famine workout, if you have something you'd rather try, have at it- this shit isn't set in stone. Hell, if you want to tackle <a href="https://proteindynamix.com/academy/training/train-like-eddie-hall/" target="_blank">Eddie Hall's 13.5 hour a week insanity,</a> be my guest- you'll never know how your body will respond unless you try it, no matter what the 150lb pussies on your favorite website of choice for pointless discussion of training techniques is.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">You'll notice there are no loading protocols because you're expected not to be a fucking pussy for a few weeks. Go heavy as shit. Take whatever rest period you need to attack the next set.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 1</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>1/2 Squats</b>- 12 x 2 (10 second holds at the top of the rep) (apparently the internet calls these Anderson squats now)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Wide Stance Good Mornings</b>- 3 x 6 (go heavy on these to bring up your glutes and hams)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Hamstring Curls</b>- 5 x 10-15</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf Raises</b>- 4 x 50</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Pullups / Chinups</b>- 5 x max</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 2</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press / Floor Press</b>- 10 x 2; 2 x AMRAP with 60% of your work set weight and a wider grip) </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Weighted Dips</b>- 4 x 6</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Unweighted Dips</b>- 2 x AMRAP</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Military Press</b>- 5 x 12 (do these reps short and fast. You're not locking out on them, but keeping constant tension on the muscles and firing them off as quickly as possible)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Superset of Rope Pushdowns and Overhead Extensions</b>- 5 sets with the weight you would use for sets of 12 on pushdowns and do AMRAP on both.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If that doesn't get your ass to the gym on the regular, nothing will. </span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 3</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Pull</b>- 10 x 2 (I don't care if these are high pulls, deadlifts, hex bar deads, rack pulls, or whatever. The what doesn't matter so much as the why, and the why is because heavy pulls are the reason you have arms and hands)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bent-Over Rows</b>- 6 x 6 (again, the style you use matters not at all- the effort you put in does)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Face Pulls / Bent Over Laterals</b>- 4 x 20 (the key here is working</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Curls</b>- 4 x 6</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curls</b>- 3 x 25 (Go light and get a huge pump. Bodybuilders do this shit for a reason)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 4</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Optional fill-in day</b>. Use this for whatever you want to jam into the workout that's not already in there. Bodyparts you want to bring up, pet lifts on which you want more work, etc. For me, this is always shoulders and arms, because neither can ever be too big (short of the synthol retards, who should be gassed and their corpses should be used to poison the IG broads filling their faces with the whore version of synthol, Juvederm).</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Or use it as an off day if you need one. Let your conscience be your guide, slacker.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuy4aHFMNK7Esw9qkZqxDxRT76kCFMlplyGe6abGjDjQz8dPWyQzlElzGrJgATP6FGfmPn9cSIEg4wOZyGAIB-Nm6bKYwAHqjVXxFboo1bPXKUnotI8Me_HcqoP_CV4mkibtY5LoH71n9D/s1600/2015-olympia-212-showdown-finals-jose-raymond-9.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1500" data-original-width="1000" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuy4aHFMNK7Esw9qkZqxDxRT76kCFMlplyGe6abGjDjQz8dPWyQzlElzGrJgATP6FGfmPn9cSIEg4wOZyGAIB-Nm6bKYwAHqjVXxFboo1bPXKUnotI8Me_HcqoP_CV4mkibtY5LoH71n9D/s640/2015-olympia-212-showdown-finals-jose-raymond-9.jpg" width="426" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="background-color: #fdfcfc; font-size: 16px;">Jose Raymond, who has some of the sickest legs in bodybuilding, can rep 405 for 10 on the front squat pre-contest and has squatted 700 in the gym, had this to say about why he focuses on he doesn't go as heavy anymore, and it wasn't injuries: "Back in the day it was all about how much weight I could lift and for how many reps. That’s how I built the mass, </span></span></span><span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">but now what I need is a lot more separation and detail</span></span><span style="background-color: #fdfcfc; font-size: 16px;">." </span></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #fdfcfc; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><b>In short, he was just getting too goddamn big from going crazy heavy.</b></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: #fdfcfc; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 5</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Squat / Back Squat</b>- 6 x 3; 1 x AMRAP with 60% of your work weight</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Hamstring Curl</b>- Same rep scheme as the squatting, but with 2 AMRAP sets</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf Raise</b>- 8 x 6</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Shrugs</b>- 10 x 3 with at least 125% or your 1RM on deadlifts. No more bitch weights on shrugs.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Curl</b>- 5 x 10 (Dealer's choice on the exercise- just do some kind of curl. Get a good pump.)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Military Press / Push Press</b>- 8 x 2</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Klokov Press</b>- 5 x 10</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Bench Press</b>- 5 x 5</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Close Grip Bench Press</b>- 4 x 6</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Skullcrushers</b>- 1 x 10, 8, 6, 4, 2, 2, AMRAP (with the weight you originally used for 10)</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkuEN-82S58Nosj408O_MLRQmN0ymip_5vCaeE9SPfZM5WdFsGXFuYhq6xZ9zPTTl7jGZYXa2uFmoSrrDC20MvQYIW4DbzVFCqvZ7DpsGAAkkf9_qGWOxfmIBQ-rXVcV5E4wiFYG4ZcfyJ/s1600/vRw0N9U1j0aXKSROssN6HUphTxz.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1170" data-original-width="780" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkuEN-82S58Nosj408O_MLRQmN0ymip_5vCaeE9SPfZM5WdFsGXFuYhq6xZ9zPTTl7jGZYXa2uFmoSrrDC20MvQYIW4DbzVFCqvZ7DpsGAAkkf9_qGWOxfmIBQ-rXVcV5E4wiFYG4ZcfyJ/s640/vRw0N9U1j0aXKSROssN6HUphTxz.jpg" width="426" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So there you have it- the Feast, Famine, and Ferocity Diet. Two weeks of rather unpleasant but productive protein sparing modified fasts and workouts designed to burn the fat fat off you like the skin off Germans being firebombed in Dresden followed by a month of eating like your gainz depend on it and training like a Tookie Williams on some badass PCP. The net result will be net fat loss and net muscle gain, all in a timespan that the internet will claim is entirely unrealistic and the result of steroids because they're jealous as fuck and essentially useless. And even better yet, you can repeat this cycle as many or as few times as you like, depending on what you're trying to accomplish, so you can drop this in as a quick six week shake-up or a six month bulk that will lean you out. Either way, like Parker Lewis, you can't fucking lose.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Sources</b>:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Forbes GB, Brown MR, Welle SL, Underwood LE. Hormonal response to overfeeding. Am J Clin Nutr. 1989 Apr;49(4):608-11.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Hirst, K. Kris. Feasting: The Archaeology and History of Celebrating Food. ThoughtCo. 1 Oct 2018. Web. 3 Dec 2018. <a href="https://www.thoughtco.com/feasting-archaeology-and-history-170940">https://www.thoughtco.com/feasting-archaeology-and-history-170940</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Jebb SA, Prentice AM, Goldberg GR, Murgatroyd PR, Black AE, Coward WA. </span>Changes in macronutrient balance during over- and underfeeding assessed by 12-d continuous whole-body calorimetry. Am J Clin Nutr. 1996 Sep;64(3):259-66.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Rozenek R, Ward P, Long S, Garhammer J. Effects of high-calorie supplements on body composition and muscular strength following resistance training. J Sports Med Phys Fitness. 2002 Sep;42(3):340-7.</span></span><br />
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Senegalese wrestlers: stars made from fighting spirit and mysticism. Men's Health UK. 7 Sep 2018. Web. 3 Dec 2018. <a href="http://www.menshealth.co.uk/fitness/senegalese-wrestlers-stars-made-from-fighting-spirit-and-mysticism">http://www.menshealth.co.uk/fitness/senegalese-wrestlers-stars-made-from-fighting-spirit-and-mysticism</a></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-12020349912179583932018-11-29T10:57:00.002-05:002018-12-01T09:20:21.054-05:00Feast, Famine, And Ferocity Diet, Part 2- Welcome To The Suck<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Miss the intro to this series? Yeah, it's been awhile. <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/09/the-feast-or-famine-diet-part-1.html?zx=dcd336838f45ea9b" target="_blank">Go here for a refresher.</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The story of a phoenix rising from the ashes is iconic and timeless. It's an archetype that transcends time and place and speaks to the indomitability of the human spirit. Be it humanity's seeming inborn tendency to root for the underdog, or the dominant American/Western appreciation for the rags-to-riches, pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps, polar-opposite-of-Donald-Trump motherfuckers who spit in the face of adversity and dominate the opposition because they simply refuse to fucking lose, these stories dominate the modern zeitgeist. This is the reason the Rocky series seem to be endless in spite of the fact that Clubber Lang or Ivan Drago would have quite literally killed that little man in the ring and worn his skin to their birthday parties, why the films of the 1980's were so obsessed with horrible rags-to-riches stories like <i>Brewster's Millions </i>and that cinematic nightmare <i>Arthur</i> were popular in spite of their dogshit plots and Dudley Moore, and why tales of redemption and rebirth are some of the oldest and most beloved stories ever recorded.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Did any non-Italians actually root for Rocky in this fucking flick?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Rising from the ashes, digging yourself out of the rubble and emerging from the previous conflagration like V in <i>V for Vendetta</i> is as intrinsically motivational thing as one can accomplish, and the inspiration it provides serves to drive you to even greater heights. Too often, we become complacent, trapped in a mindset that the status quo is good enough, convinced we have chosen the most prudent, effective, and correct path, adopting a mindset that disallows consideration of alternatives. Stagnation and plateaus then plague our training and stymie our physique and strength goals, yet we tinker and tweak when what we really need is a firestorm to purify our minds and bodies. To scorch the fat off our soul. A cataclysm from which we can be born anew, and from which we can regain our predatory glow.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvF0Fj-1mNOfyA1vzDdPU3ybraFO4NZzszgImGIvaiSLOGSipWI2kgtJvIGD6Gc5FE59LR5cjsIDnUcpJBUGrqbIKZGMDvlsYZ1OB6Utw7piL6fn7RRlR-5nDoGOLRYryYzRT1RGHNT5ky/s1600/vforvendetta.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhvF0Fj-1mNOfyA1vzDdPU3ybraFO4NZzszgImGIvaiSLOGSipWI2kgtJvIGD6Gc5FE59LR5cjsIDnUcpJBUGrqbIKZGMDvlsYZ1OB6Utw7piL6fn7RRlR-5nDoGOLRYryYzRT1RGHNT5ky/s640/vforvendetta.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Rebirth after destruction is the natural order of things- maggots grow into flies eating rotting flesh, new growth forms in the ashes of forest fires, and new nations are formed from the rubble of the old. Hell, the French even refer to orgasms as "the little death," bring new life, ostensibly, from each load dropped. Just as Taiwan grew out of the ashes of China's post-monarchic socio-political disaster, the United States Constitution was penned after the dissolution of the Articles of Confederation and a near civil war, Robert Downey Jr's rebirthed career after passing out in his neighbor's kid's bed, and Five Finger Death Punch grew out of the death of a couple (and in the case of <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uWNAzMyDv58" target="_blank">Motograter</a>, far better bands), lifters can also destroy and rebuild themselves anew.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNTyEAfaeLH7szxvwtPcF0RmydyNeoGqCSgcGLWuQxKbvFZxQ7_FaQEN0BT_SQADLHfKki-JiXInbSMOdVm6RvumCnWpy96b41RSogOqQ0ZBLSc_dUTn4ZblwqxyTjxi8jNF0uBVEC7Yok/s1600/Bruce-Randall.03.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="441" data-original-width="588" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNTyEAfaeLH7szxvwtPcF0RmydyNeoGqCSgcGLWuQxKbvFZxQ7_FaQEN0BT_SQADLHfKki-JiXInbSMOdVm6RvumCnWpy96b41RSogOqQ0ZBLSc_dUTn4ZblwqxyTjxi8jNF0uBVEC7Yok/s1600/Bruce-Randall.03.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/a-public-service-announcement-from.html" target="_blank">Bruce Randall bulked hard as fuck, cut even harder, and then rebuilt his physique into a solid 1950's bodybuilder look</a> with enough strength to move <u>serious</u> weights.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">What I am proposing isn't as dramatic as self-immolation, though it might seem that way at first. Nor is it intended as a long-term scheme, though it could be used as one if one so chooses. Instead, this is a diet that is intended to be used periodically to shock the system, shake things up, and knock the rust off of doing the same fucking thing month in and month out. If you're a fucking machine who is continually making progress with the same 'ol shit and rocking abs that local Amish women use as a laundry washboard, you can just stick this in your back pocket in case you need something different down the road, because if experience has taught me one thing, it's that nothing works forever in the strength game. </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-JzL1Y-3xl2Mo5dfjqqFUv9fKZd2V-uPTSZi4FBO7y6_NbSewG1cKTktoZpXuOT3g0Rn9dOfDKQ4pjOkYzqoMEiA5BV3Q-uHzmt4Nk21v2fAoPC3leUnz4ieEkgBNprVpoWB-cITXwcbr/s1600/prisoners-mess-at-arsa.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1059" data-original-width="1600" height="423" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-JzL1Y-3xl2Mo5dfjqqFUv9fKZd2V-uPTSZi4FBO7y6_NbSewG1cKTktoZpXuOT3g0Rn9dOfDKQ4pjOkYzqoMEiA5BV3Q-uHzmt4Nk21v2fAoPC3leUnz4ieEkgBNprVpoWB-cITXwcbr/s640/prisoners-mess-at-arsa.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Strength sports legend <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2010/04/baddest-motherfuckers-ever-13-hermann-i.html" target="_blank">Hermann Goerner</a> was one of these poor fuckers not once but twice in his hyper-illustrious career. Losing weight is hardly the end of the fucking world, and you're no special snowflake, no matter what you say- the weight will pile right back on.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">With all of that said, it's time to get into the the details of the Feast or Famine Diet. The diet begins with a brutal introductory period of a <a href="https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4784653/" target="_blank">protein-sparing modified fast</a> (PSMF) designed to strip both body fat and muscle glycogen from your body (in addition to burning the proverbial fat off your soul) followed by alternating bouts of overeating and extremely heavy lifting and PSMF and high volume repetition work, respectively. In this way, we compress the cyclical eating utilized by out historical forbears into shorter "seasons" that will net overall muscle gain and fat loss, profound changes in the look of your physique, and concurrent gains in both your maximum effort and repetition strength. Yeah, with this motherfucker you can literally have your cake and eat it too.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>You just have to starve for it a bit.</u></span></b></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7d2ckxfmEgUjCb2mQZuWHVJAzHhMWcT3MdNeFjWq1B1t0AyxfOcwtHPbn411mY8E-2c7maDXaKSWa2TO1tkKgSjau5NWZEuC9QKK-ENdQqpaW8gndqFvIGG9rrHRUXl-IDCLY5FSAFmDQ/s1600/christian-bale-before-after.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="281" data-original-width="490" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7d2ckxfmEgUjCb2mQZuWHVJAzHhMWcT3MdNeFjWq1B1t0AyxfOcwtHPbn411mY8E-2c7maDXaKSWa2TO1tkKgSjau5NWZEuC9QKK-ENdQqpaW8gndqFvIGG9rrHRUXl-IDCLY5FSAFmDQ/s1600/christian-bale-before-after.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Remember this transformation? Christian Bale went from a lean and muscular 6' 184lbs to damn near dead in the Machinist (dropped to 124lbs), then bulked hard as hell for Batman, getting to a thick 215 and then cutting to 190 so he'd fit into the Batsuit <b>in five months</b>. Bear in mind he was so goddamned malnourished after the Machinist it took a couple of weeks of stuffing himself before he could even go jogging or lift.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The first three weeks are gonna be fucking rough- you'll be hungry, angry, lonely, and tired, but to hell with that HALT shit- stimulants are going to become your best friend. When I PSMF, I combine either <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/red-sky-quick-release-thermogenic/" target="_blank">Red Sky</a>, <a href="https://bronkaid.com/index.php?lang=en&utm_campaign=Brand-English&utm_medium=SEM&utm_source=Google&utm_content=Bronkaid-OTC-Caplets&gclid=CjwKCAiAlvnfBRA1EiwAVOEgfIOIah8f9B4s8pzM5X1siY608qEL_OtzH2-l6oWCC4AftJelHUliSBoCcw0QAvD_BwE" target="_blank">Bronk-Aid</a>, and an aspirin, or <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-inferno-thermogenic-fat-burner/" target="_blank">Cannibal Inferno</a> and Bronk-Aid three times a day for energy (which you will seriously need) and vastly increased fat metabolism, or do one of those two stacks twice a day and then <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-ferox-stim-pre-workout-supplements/" target="_blank">Cannibal Ferox</a> and Bronk-Aid the third. Though ECA and ECY stacks offer make dieting a far less miserable and lengthy experience and provide ample energy for training, Chaos and Pain LLC does not endorse such a stack, as such advice would be imprudent, immoral, and illegal, so bear in mind that is my personal recommendation, lest anyone with a JD and a penchant for ambulance chasing out there get any stupid fucking ideas. In any event, you will likely feel as though you've been exsanguinated by Chaos chiurgeons should you attempt to train without stims, so get acquainted with them and learn to love them if you don't already.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I've basically been reading naught but Warhammer novels for three months, so buckle up for some 40k references.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>The Famine</u> (2-4 weeks<u>)</u></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>4-6 protein shakes per day</b>, evenly spaced, in water, <b>totaling 1 gram/lb of bodyweight a day. </b><u>No meal replacements- keep your carbs as close to zero as possible.</u></span></li>
<li><b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">2 weeks if lean / leanish, 4 weeks if chubby / fat</span></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Stimulant-based thermogenic</b> (containing caffeine and yohimbine HCl if possible, like <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-inferno-thermogenic-fat-burner/" target="_blank">Cannibal Inferno</a>). You can also go old school and combine caffeine, yohimbine HCL, aspirin and ephedrine yourself. I don't get too crazy dosing it out- when I do that I just take a couple No Doz with a Bronk Aid, 5mg of Yohimbine HCL, and an aspirin- do the research yourself and see what you tolerate, because those stims hit people differently.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>A thyroid-based fatburner </b>will obviously help as well. You can either go all in and get T3 and albuterol on a peptides site online, or if you want to avoid the internet stigma of "eat clen, tren hard," you can grab some <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-claw-thyroid-fat-burner/" target="_blank">Cannibal Claw</a>, which is about 75% as effective as the aforementioned stack. The thyroid stuff is less important than the stimulants, though, because you need the energy, so if it is a one-or-the-other proposition, go with stims.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Nutrition repartitioning agents / blood sugar management supplements</b>. I've tried everything from <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-carnage-killer-bombsicle/" target="_blank">Cannibal Claw</a> to <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/predator-glucose-disposal-agent/" target="_blank">Predator</a> to handfuls of cinnamon and vanadyl sulfate caps, and they seem to help speed fat loss, but they're not 100% essential like the stims are.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The amount of protein is based on your bodyweight- you're going to consume one gram of protein per pound of your weight. Thus, you should be getting roughly eight or nine calories per pound of bodyweight due to the trace carbs and fat in your protein shakes. These shakes are not intended to fuel your workouts or daily life- you're essentially fasting. Instead, they're to ensure you lose as little muscle as possible while undergoing a fortnight-long fast.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If you're Russian or a communist and reading this, stop short of your natural inclination when fasting... and try to avoid a Cannibal Island type situation. There's nothing wrong with cannibalism, but if it's starvation induced, you've taken the diet a bit too far.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The idea of starting with a famine period is simple- if you're considering a recomposition diet, you're likely not seeing much in the way of definition or abs. And if you're both small and chubby, stripping off some fat will mean your will put on less fat in your bulking period, because studies have shown that the less body fat you hold, the less you will gain while bulking. And ladies, this is why you put on more fat during a dirty bulk than your boyfriend/husband/training partner/coach/fuckbuddy/etc- it's one of the many ways the gods have issued your gender a hearty "fuck you,"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Overfeeding: In experiments of at least 3-weeks' duration, the weight gain of thin people comprises 60-70% lean tissues, whereas in the obese it is 30-40%. Underfeeding: In humans, there is an inverse curvilinear relationship between initial body fat content and the proportion of weight loss consisting of lean tissue" (Forbes).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2G4wyld1bfD6kJdLcccMg06ZgSyobzo_s3AprxUhrgJAexD77qHAjrALkMY5Yo24_pt4b13vsbFIppBaElIwFtW9MShGKGNPBCctvBpO49dN5Jtwl5yiMOm47VJuHI_bsByTk7Xw9zM_w/s1600/6903819250_c6bf3e4ba0.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2G4wyld1bfD6kJdLcccMg06ZgSyobzo_s3AprxUhrgJAexD77qHAjrALkMY5Yo24_pt4b13vsbFIppBaElIwFtW9MShGKGNPBCctvBpO49dN5Jtwl5yiMOm47VJuHI_bsByTk7Xw9zM_w/s1600/6903819250_c6bf3e4ba0.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I, for one, tend to appreciate females' higher bodyfat percentages.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As chicks hold higher body fat percentages naturally, the probability they'll gain a greater amount of fat while bulking than a guy is pretty high. So again, dropping some fat before starting the bulk makes sense. The second sentence in that study is also important, because it essentially states that people carrying more body fat will lose less fat when dieting than leaner people. As Metallica said, it's sad but true, </span><br />
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<b><span style="color: red; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">so if you're a bit on the fatter side, you might want to extend the initial famine period to a month to put you on a better footing when you start bulking. It'll suck harder than an amateur porn star trying to pay her kid's private college tuition for a month, but it'll be worth it from a metabolic and an aesthetic standpoint.</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">With that said, you have the single most effective dieting strategy on your side, because the protein sparing modified fast is <b>just as effective in losing visceral fat as bariatric surgery,</b> and it preserves the muscle you have while you're burning fat cells like they're bodies in a death camp (Ravasia).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWq2eg1NP8r-WQUnswi5Z4eyjvDfXt4XNMjRml1mDJ59GbBY3Eze10eoJHV6HrrlytBSDAe5rOxBdiIrxXpf37SWi6t2dQnoFr1QfQl4pS9tqlstRATMJ2kVd-3N3PqwJDx33vVWLj9g_1/s1600/6-06-2016_11-57-10_am.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="337" data-original-width="700" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWq2eg1NP8r-WQUnswi5Z4eyjvDfXt4XNMjRml1mDJ59GbBY3Eze10eoJHV6HrrlytBSDAe5rOxBdiIrxXpf37SWi6t2dQnoFr1QfQl4pS9tqlstRATMJ2kVd-3N3PqwJDx33vVWLj9g_1/s640/6-06-2016_11-57-10_am.jpg" width="640" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This bad little motherfucker trained his ass off in a British military prison after slapping the shit out of a British officer while in the RAF and survived the Bengali famine before winning Mr. Universe in 1951. A bit of privation does a body good.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>Famine Training Routine</u> (2-4 weeks)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The logic behind the training routine, then, is fairly simple- just as many of the more warlike (and coincidentally more muscular people in history had an on and an off season dietv(the campaign season and winter), they had an on and off season physical regime. Whereas the non-campaign months were generally reserved for more sedentary activities and the heavy lifting that would go into building ships, dragging logs, the feats of strength to be performed at festivals, and the like, the campaign seasons were devoted to shit like rowing and fighting. In short, exercise that would build far more muscular endurance than strength. Famine training will follow that lead and focus far more on the endurance/pump aspects of lifting than training for pure strength, and the diet will somewhat (at least calorically) mimic the often meager rations that would employ.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Having trained in this kind of caloric deficit quite a bit, I can tell you firsthand that you will likely not be putting up PRs during this period. You will likely feel drained, lethargic, shaky, and weak, and that is not the state in which most of us put up record numbers. Though that sucks, remember you are not a fucking slave to your stomach. Your mind controls your body, not the other way around. That said, training with your usual poundages likely isn't going to happen, but keeping your training weights close to what they usually would be if you were stuffing your face and increasing your volume will put you in prime position to crush weights when you start eating like you're at an old school Roman bacchanalian feast. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The following is what I recommend, but it isn't set in stone. Protocol training can just as easily lead to training as success, because what works like a charm for one person might end in catastrophe for another. As such, I encourage you to forge your own path. Having made that disclaimer, I've found that training 4-5 days a week with your sessions consisting of a single heavy compound lift followed by a bunch of repetition work that focuses on the pump and burning up muscle glycogen seems to do the trick. This is different than the old Chaos and Pain shit for two reasons- </span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">this is designed to deplete glycogen during a fast, </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">the point of my training style is that it isn't dogmatic and remains fluid. In spite of that shit, I still get people telling me that my own training style "isn't Chaos and Pain," because reading comprehension is fucking lacking in schools these days, apparently. </span></li>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>* As I mentioned above, I recommend either an extra cap of your chosen fat burner (or two), plus whatever you might want to stack it with, prior to hitting the gym. That or a stim heavy preworkout (which will also burn fat, and I have no idea how or why that isn't obvious).</b></span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 1</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Military Press</b>- 4 x AMRAP (90%1RM). 2 minute rests between sets</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Bench Press</b>- 6 x AMRAP (60%1RM). 2 minute rest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Machine Shoulder Press</b>- 6 x 10-12 12RM. 90 second rest. <a href="https://www.quora.com/What-is-a-triple-drop-set" target="_blank">Triple drop sets</a> on the last two sets.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>15 Minutes of bi/tri supersets</b>- 8-12 reps per set. 15 seconds between each superset to shake out arms. Use cables if possible to keep constant tension on your arms. </span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 2</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Squat / Back Squat</b>- 4 x 3 (5RM). 3 minute rests between sets</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Squat / Back Squat Death Set</b>- use 50% of your work weight for a single AMRAP set<b> </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Machine Row / Super strict Bent Over Row</b>- 6 x 20. 90 second rest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Leg Extensions</b>- 3 x 25. 90 second rest.</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 3</span></u></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Off / Cardio</span></b></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 4</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Flat Bench Press</b>- 4 x AMRAP (90%1RM). 2 minute rests between sets</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Military Press</b>- 6 x AMRAP (60%1RM). 2 minute rest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>20 Minutes of Dips</b>. Whatever your max number of consecutive reps, chop it in half, then do sets of that number with 15-60 second rests between them for 20 minutes. Prepare to be fucking sore.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Unilateral Concentration Curls</b> (with wrist twist at the bottom)- 5 x 20. 60 second rest</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 5</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Explosive Bent Over Rows (from the floor)</b>- 4 x AMRAP (90%1RM). 2 minute rests between sets. Call them Pendlay rows if you want, but tards on the internet do them like they're attending a fucking tea party. Rip the bar off the floor and slam it into your solar plexus, then let it crash to the floor. Try not to use too much body english, but don't make this something form Nazis can masturbate to. Make some fucking noise and go nuts. I rarely do fewer than 10 sets on these because they're more fun than a free handjob in a lube factory from a Vivid porn star, so do more if you feel like it.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Squat / Back Squat</b>- 6 x 4 (6RM). 2 minute rest. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Pullups</b>- Same as the dips on Day 3.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf Raise</b>- 5 x 25. 90 second rest.</span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 6</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Dealer's Choice.</b> Train whatever you want for up to 90 minutes. Literally whatever you feel like training- I've been known to do shrugs for over an hour straight. Just enjoy yourself.</span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Day 7</span></u></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Off / Cardio</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Running doesn't seem to be hurting CrossFitters' gains.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>A Word in Regards to Cardio</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I've made no bones about the fact that I fucking despise cardio. I don't think it's entirely necessary for getting super lean or for general fitness, but it isn't going to hurt to do some. Weighted steady state cardio is an excellent choice if you feel like doing some extra training and want to drop fat faster, as are sprints. Honestly, any extra training you do is going to speed fat loss, so feel free to throw it in. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>By the way, there is some evidence out there that the aerobic exercise will induce hypertrophy </b>(Konopka), which actually supports a theory I have regarding the use of a couple of specific exercises to develop maximal strength (which is the basis of a book I'm in the process of writing). As such, you would probably do well to include some cardio in your routine.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So there you have the Famine part of the Feast, Famine, and Ferocity Diet. Coming up next, I'll detail the fun part- the Feast, and the program that goes with turning you into a musclebound warlord of the weight room. Also in the hopper are articles about another 1950s era bodybuilder, a good, old fashioned Chaos and Pain rant, and part twoof the Berserker or Zen Monk series (about which I had completely forgotten). Like I said, I've got a ton of new shit to drop on you people. </span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Forbes GB. Body fat content influences the body composition response to nutrition and exercise. Ann N Y Acad Sci. 2000 May;904:359-65.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Konopka AR, Harber MP. Skeletal Muscle Hypertrophy after Aerobic Exercise Training. Exerc Sport Sci Rev. 2014 Apr; 42(2): 53–61.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Jebb SA, Prentice AM, Goldberg GR, Murgatroyd PR, Black AE, Coward WA. </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Changes in macronutrient balance during over- and underfeeding assessed by 12-d continuous whole-body calorimetry. Am J Clin Nutr. 1996 Sep;64(3):259-66.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Longland TM, Oikawa SY, Mitchell CJ, Devries MC, Phillips SM. Higher compared with lower dietary protein during an energy deficit combined with intense exercise promotes greater lean mass gain and fat mass loss: a randomized trial. Am J Clin Nutr. 2016 Mar;103(3):738-46.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Ravasia D, Ravasia K, Sabowitz B. Protein Sparing Modified Fast Favors Loss of DXA-VAT and Preservation of Lean Body Mass. J Clin Dens. 2014 Jul;17(3):399</span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com18tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-11382728867358773562018-11-27T10:45:00.001-05:002018-11-27T11:06:01.783-05:00The "Perfect Gym" Is All In Your Head<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtmOTtBcO9jR5ysyFTfZCfU-t94fV4tkIsKuj0X4Y4GnJcRzIiTMyWtdODe8Q2rVSPxBPWHTO1Ws95_yiE0E1e0UNYdJ87FE1gSc5xs2p5HQOckkpkCUd3w-Ssb7Ri3K2bDwPN8BJC130Z/s1600/200.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="327" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtmOTtBcO9jR5ysyFTfZCfU-t94fV4tkIsKuj0X4Y4GnJcRzIiTMyWtdODe8Q2rVSPxBPWHTO1Ws95_yiE0E1e0UNYdJ87FE1gSc5xs2p5HQOckkpkCUd3w-Ssb7Ri3K2bDwPN8BJC130Z/s1600/200.gif" /></a></div>
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Not too far off from my setup in Beijing.</div>
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As I staggered the fifteen steps from my toilet shower to my desk, sweating like a pedophile in an elementary school bathroom, desperate to find another roll of toilet paper, I lamented the fact that dysentery was going to steal yet another day of heaving around some heavy iron from me. That's not to say I wasn't going to train, but rather that I was going to train light to avoid shitting my pants under a heavy load. Just five days earlier I had hit an all-time high in bodyweight, 171lbs, which was just about 10lbs heavier than my best bodyweight prior to entering the smog-choked land of the terra cotta soldiers. Upon turning and seeing the trail of blood I'd left on the floor leading to the small pool forming directly beneath me, I decided that discretion was the better form of valor, because unless I'd been shot in the browneye by an overzealous and underfed Chinese soldier, I should probably not be bleeding from the rectum and a day off from the gym was indeed in order. After a moment of half-delirious consideration, I washed down enough anti-laduzi (Mandarin for diarrhea and the only word of Chinese my dad ever learned) to prevent a normal person from ever shitting again, I fired up the showerhead over the toilet bowl because my asshole felt like it had spent a weekend with Marsellis Wallace's buddies, a pair of pliers, and a blowtorch, so a shower was vastly preferable to scrubbing my abused asshole with what amounted to sand paper but was alleged to be toilet tissue.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhes01BZp17ZC_z924Txx7kN2ytGLp1Cq5H60KG82-ltHlAfLPckjDmryj_yFGWXtK1zU8YoAC9FY0XiCYPqahHrDmOv__ZQLV31iCzwDrVBd0jOuUCVGXCEt8rHTc8m_ac5gJQES5iSj_/s1600/metrx.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhes01BZp17ZC_z924Txx7kN2ytGLp1Cq5H60KG82-ltHlAfLPckjDmryj_yFGWXtK1zU8YoAC9FY0XiCYPqahHrDmOv__ZQLV31iCzwDrVBd0jOuUCVGXCEt8rHTc8m_ac5gJQES5iSj_/s1600/metrx.jpg" /></a></div>
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I have no earthly idea how much money my dad spent in sending me Met-Rx in 1998, but it was not an inconsiderable sum. He was the fucking man.</div>
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Unless you're a fecalfeliac, you're likely wondering what the fuck this story has to do with anything lifting related. The tie-in, rather than another rant about eating to grow, is that I managed to pack on ten or eleven pounds of rip in about six weeks without the aid of supplements beyond a couple of meal replacement shakes and/or protein bars a day, and of those six weeks I had dysentery for at least three. Not only that, but I accomplished that feat in the most rudimentary gym I've ever seen that wasn't in Uganda, and I'd already been training for five years, so these weren't noob gains. Add to that, it was summer in Beijing, so the temperature ranged from 90-100 degrees in the daytime with the smog-choked humidity so thick you had to use a steak knife to cut it before you could take a deep breath, and the gym in which I trained daily didn't even have a fucking fan, nevermind an air conditioner.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIPUv4cuewv_T4oJ_fnPBLPoz6-37u2YOSmsU1Yi_Fh1SEUgXdFydei1PXLgPK90V8DTt8G0ytPM7TsRtOqJhn2UltqmvAPfHusF1vKYN1r1brxle4240DovhcaoCtVfJHFENOIBgffHgX/s1600/ob_ce4926_tumblr-n9as8okz0o1tbtx9po1-400.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="304" data-original-width="400" height="243" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIPUv4cuewv_T4oJ_fnPBLPoz6-37u2YOSmsU1Yi_Fh1SEUgXdFydei1PXLgPK90V8DTt8G0ytPM7TsRtOqJhn2UltqmvAPfHusF1vKYN1r1brxle4240DovhcaoCtVfJHFENOIBgffHgX/s320/ob_ce4926_tumblr-n9as8okz0o1tbtx9po1-400.gif" width="320" /></a></div>
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If that's your thing, you likely didn't need the explanation behind the intro. </div>
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Nah- this isn't another public service announcement to enjoin you to eat like you're white trash at a shitty buffet. This is a statement regarding the endless online discussions about finding the right gym to ensure success. This debate, like the mindset behind it, is entirely wrongheaded. As it is with choosing a program, the maximization of success with gym selection is far less about the equipment than it is about the effort one expends on the equipment they're using. To wit:<br />
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<b>Herschel Walker</b> built an unbelievable physique with little more than thousands upon thousands of pushups and situps, and a shitload of sprints. At 51, he almost certainly looked better than you and everyone you know with that routine, and he spent literally nothing on gym memberships beyond an mma school.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibQqXekIHi0q3FU17Q_J_yKX3Oxnof1pyQ5gILrqUK6tMJtx-vrMWqI-v3x0gQXB4PSgR7BwxVIAPJNPjIrv4B1VOegZOHV1fp3P_0LszVnn3rFo5haex5LPjBnuMC9C1jOwfSh9Xa7ezq/s1600/bruce-lee-circuit-trainer-2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="320" data-original-width="479" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEibQqXekIHi0q3FU17Q_J_yKX3Oxnof1pyQ5gILrqUK6tMJtx-vrMWqI-v3x0gQXB4PSgR7BwxVIAPJNPjIrv4B1VOegZOHV1fp3P_0LszVnn3rFo5haex5LPjBnuMC9C1jOwfSh9Xa7ezq/s1600/bruce-lee-circuit-trainer-2.jpg" /></a></div>
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Marcy Multi gyms were so basic they should have come with Ugg boots and a pumpkin spice latte.</div>
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<b>Bruce Lee</b> built a crazy strong and muscular physique with a routine centered on <a href="http://main.poliquingroup.com/ArticlesMultimedia/Articles/Article/2636/Workout_Systems_Peripheral_Heart_Action_Training.aspx" target="_blank">PHA (peripheral heart action) training</a> that mostly utilized a Marcy trainer, the predecessor to multistation Universal machines.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNr_bbjy940jE-8ujkLaeXeVJnEpTNzxDoTjujVyVKgXskCvRr85kejkgJylfu3CaH5QCdUuYvgjd6PoJs9F9_YChGBI4RbbFc-J096WWqZogO_DUZOrSnouWNuWy1wiFKL5qRfWunHy9M/s1600/MV5BMTQzNTkzODkyNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwODA2ODU3._V1_.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="411" data-original-width="485" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNr_bbjy940jE-8ujkLaeXeVJnEpTNzxDoTjujVyVKgXskCvRr85kejkgJylfu3CaH5QCdUuYvgjd6PoJs9F9_YChGBI4RbbFc-J096WWqZogO_DUZOrSnouWNuWy1wiFKL5qRfWunHy9M/s320/MV5BMTQzNTkzODkyNF5BMl5BanBnXkFtZTYwODA2ODU3._V1_.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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For his role in Reign of Fire, <b>Matthew McConaughey </b>literally grappled with cows and carried shit around his ranch to bulk up. His basic weight workouts, like Bruce Lee's and Sonny Chiba's, three days circuit training. Nothing special, yet the dude looked like a badass in that flick without ever touching a bumper plate.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtIJUcT61QClPiJozvRJwlEZgTUnuPYqmJglFKjJks-hk_anLaLz_Annobd-a9KX3AsN4yfD0HUDrIoNRZ4hF7fzQEcA3kHehL_LJzg-G5qblZI0bOuyqppZXhu6DdWQa5gOWLvB1zZXOI/s1600/nOe9fMq.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="375" data-original-width="499" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjtIJUcT61QClPiJozvRJwlEZgTUnuPYqmJglFKjJks-hk_anLaLz_Annobd-a9KX3AsN4yfD0HUDrIoNRZ4hF7fzQEcA3kHehL_LJzg-G5qblZI0bOuyqppZXhu6DdWQa5gOWLvB1zZXOI/s320/nOe9fMq.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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Big Jim Williams was the first man in history to bench 660lbs and still one of the biggest benchers ever, in spite of the fact that he had to take all of his attempts back to back (he had as much time between attempts as it took to load the weight and count down from 90), and he did almost all of his training in prison. In spite of what you might think, weight lifting equipment in jails is hardly state of the art, and at the time Williams competed bench presses were notoriously rickety even in high-end gyms.</div>
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In case you missed it, there are dudes in Africa who are doing a hell of a lot more with a hell of a lot less than you.</div>
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The list of athletes and celebrities who have done amazing things with their physiques in rudimentary gyms or *gasp* on machines is endless and dates back to antiquity, and should provide ample evidence to convince most people that they needn't train at the regional "hardcore," "functional" gym that happens to be the talk of the internet in order for them to maximize their potential. Though I realize this simple fact should be easy to grasp, I fully realize it isn't because the internet mostly exists to destroy the fabric of reality and replace it with bullshit. As such, here are a couple of gym anecdotes that might help to drive the point home:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheTDA27dXcelJKxOC1_1UTBN7pTVlS0CPkX-H6uUQJpVXTInr-Fgxj-G-OsIuZTgQKQDdERw5ICg7ET-0XgFVvTqcFN-kiUCb-s4mGkdtRHnBgYjj-Ivz40NxDvmjvFpoOA1fMM525c2dy/s1600/multiexercise.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="640" data-original-width="480" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEheTDA27dXcelJKxOC1_1UTBN7pTVlS0CPkX-H6uUQJpVXTInr-Fgxj-G-OsIuZTgQKQDdERw5ICg7ET-0XgFVvTqcFN-kiUCb-s4mGkdtRHnBgYjj-Ivz40NxDvmjvFpoOA1fMM525c2dy/s320/multiexercise.jpg" width="240" /></a></div>
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My favorite machine in high school, and one that tragically no longer exists- a weighted dip/pullup/calf raise machine.</div>
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<u>My old high school gym</u> was a 1980's special donated by a former student who upgraded his home gym and gave us the stuff he'd bought a decade prior. It boasted a Marcy multi-gym, a few old Nautilus machines, a squat rack, mismatched dumbbells, and a couple of benches. Everything was old and fucked up, and we loved it. In two years, my bench went up 140 lbs and I went from a pudgy kid to a three sport varsity athlete with school records for bodyweight exercises.<br />
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<u>World Gym Tucson</u>, which is now a boxing gym, was the best gym in which I have ever trained. The bodybuilding mecca of southern Arizona in the 1990's, our member rolls included IFBB pro <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rusty_Jeffers" target="_blank">Rusty Jeffers,</a> a couple of Westside transplants, and the most entertaining cornucopia of weightlifting maniacs I've ever seen. It had no AC, no pussies, and an absolute lunatic for an owner who would physically <i>throw</i> people out of the gym for minor gym rule infractions like leaving a plate leaning against the squat rack. Powerlifters and bodybuilders trained together (I don't think I even met an Olympic lifter until after 2000, and internet icon Steve Pulcinella was the only person I'd ever met who competed in strongman prior to 2004 or 2005), and all of the serious lifters went to every competition our gym's members entered... mostly because at that time people only competed to win, not to show up and collect a fucking participation trophy. Every person I knew in that place was jacked and strong, and we'd have non-stop impromptu competitions on everything from squatting for reps to deadlifts to bench to one arm dumbbell rows. </div>
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<a href="http://www.topgym.com/" target="_blank">Top Gym Vienna</a>. With the motto "No Wellness," I knew these were my kind of people. At the time, I was eating paleo and although prevented by EU law from taking ephedrine, was a ripped-to-fucking-shreds 170lbs when I returned home, after repping 440 on the front squat and doing ballistic pullups as the gym's sole strength athlete. You don't need to train in a strength oriented gym to be fucking strong- everyone else in that gym was an old school string-tank-top-and-spandex-shorts clad bodybuilder or figure competitor stick figure, yet we all got along famously and killed it in the gym daily. To say there was a lot of gratuitous high fiving going on between sets is like saying the volleyball scenes in Top Gun are slightly homoerotic, and that kind of rampant positivity and mutual respect made for a badass training environment.<br />
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<a href="https://www.ironsport.com/" target="_blank">Iron Sport Gym</a> is one of the few strength gyms on the planet I don't despise, and I've made massive gains as a result of training there periodically over the last 20 years. To give you some idea of how long I've known <a href="https://www.facebook.com/steve.pulcinella?ref=br_rs" target="_blank">Stevie P</a>, I found his gym as the result of seeing his ad in the Yellow Pages of the phone book years ago. If you're unfamiliar with him, he's the progenitor of the DYEL meme, a World's Strongest Man competitor, a Hall of Fame Highland Games competitor, and one of the most hilariously surly people on the planet. He's one of the most knowledgeable guys in strength sports, and our conversations helped mold my training methodology. If you're ever in the Philadelphia area, check it out- it's packed with pro bodybuilders, pro strongmen, elite Oly lifters, and a number of powerlifters of varied skill levels (though I've heard their gossip game is on a bean).</div>
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<a href="http://24ehealthclubs.com/locations/hoover/" target="_blank">24e</a>- This was the gym I trained in to set my world record, in a chrome squat rack with bars that I bent completely out of shape. It boasted no competitive strength athletes at all, had a perpetually broken homemade platform, nothing but octagonal plates, and a handful of competitive bodybuilders. Three or four guys in there benched over 500lbs (in spite of the bent, dead bars with collars that wouldn't spin and slippery vinyl benches) and never took a single gym selfie or video of themselves doing so, because they were far more interested with lifting than with posing online as lifters when in reality they'd rather be doing anything else. This gym was also the birthplace of my supplement company, and generally stands as proof that gyms are built on people, not equipment, and that bodybuilders make a gym, while powerlifters generally ruin them. That said, "mainstream" obsessed money grubbing dickheads can kill a gym even more quickly than USAPL lifters, and that gym was the victim of on such shitslug.</div>
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Renmin University gym. This is the aforementioned gym in Beijing. It boasted no fans, no AC, enough rust on the plates to give you tetanus just looking at a photo of the gym, two extremely unsafe squat racks, and a single bench. This place even lacked dumbbells, and it was so fucking hot in there that I looked like I'd just gone for a swim in my clothes after my second warmup set. It was in that primeval place that I learned how to pack on mass quickly, lifting heavy as shit on made up exercises and just going nuts the entire time shirtless in rust stained shorts.</div>
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Stern's Gym in 1970 and his gym in 2001 were not appreciably different.</div>
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I've got plenty more examples, because I've trained all over the place. I once did a set of 97 reps with 135lbs on the squat, weighing maybe 150, in a squash club's tiny gym; I've done death sets of deadlifts overlooking the Hong Kong skyline in a posh resort's fitness center; threw around some weights with the guitarist from Sworn Vengeance at the awesome hardcore gym 22nd St Barbell in Iowa; partially retore my bicep goofing around with the gym owner of an awesome Ninja Warrior/strongman gym outside of Chicago called <a href="https://www.facebook.com/GoldenAgeStrengthClub/?tn-str=k*F" target="_blank">Golden Age Strength Club</a>; I've had awesome workouts in innumerable Gold's Gyms, Powerhouses, 24 Hour Fitness around the country, plus the iconic Golds and Worlds in Venice Beach and <a href="https://www.seeing-stars.com/Play/VincesGym.shtml" target="_blank">Vince Gironda's gym</a> there, <a href="http://www.sternsgym.com/" target="_blank">Leo Stern's gym</a> in San Diego that was practically a museum piece when I trained there, among many others. Hell, I've trained in a guido gym in Pittsburgh that even had a fucking shrine, an honest to god shrine, to Robert DeNiro in it, an LA Fitness in North Hills, PA in which the dudes were so juiced up they had to wipe the pus off the benches between sets because their backne would burst, and have seen dudes bench 405 on free weight benches in Planet Fitness. In short, I've got a pretty good idea of what constitutes a good gym, and what you need to have a good lift... and it's not the facility or the equipment. It's the people who train there and the people who run the place.<br />
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If you can't find someone you want to fuck in a CrossFit gym, you need to get your test levels checked, ladies included.</div>
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If you want to dispute that, feel free, because I have one trump card you can't beat- CrossFit gyms. If the ridiculous performance of CrossFitters in the Games isn't proof of concept enough, consider the following- if you're going to be training half naked with a bunch of people who are trying to outlift and out-hot you, chance are you're going to think twice about skipping workouts or cheating on your diet. The motivation of others will carry over to you. Likewise, if you've got an undiscussed competition going on with some bench bro from your gym and you know they're gonna be checking to see how many reps you get on behind the neck press out of the corner of their eye, you might push a little harder when it's time to do your accessory work. The equipment you're using to achieve the strength you want to display is only an impediment if you're a complete fucking pussy who wants to excuse your weakness with nonsense. In fact, training on shitty equipment has the benefit of making the same weight on a good bar or a good bench seem light by comparison, so when you hit the platform weights that were a struggle fucking fly up... and it will give you extra reasons to excuse unimpressive training weights when you're typing comments on Instagram (seriously, fucking stop that shit already. Your every goddamned lift does not need to be filmed).<br />
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If only New Orleans Athletic Club would allow people to train in their historic weight room...</div>
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Speaking of training on different equipment, much of the online discussion on the subject of choosing a gym seems to come from people with little experience in doing so and even less in lifting. It's a literal matter of the blind leading the blind, which necessitates one other entreaty- for the love of all that is unholy, hit up some other gyms in your area. See what is out there. Get in some workouts on unfamiliar equipment, around unfamiliar people. Not only will this give you a great deal more perspective on the subject of what actually constitutes a great gym, but you may discover your gym is inferior to other gyms, be they an LA Fitness, a Planet Fitness, or <a href="https://www.cellisfitness.com/" target="_blank">Ryan Cellis's awesome spot in Pittsburgh</a>. You might find that you have some of the best workouts of your life while travelling, because you will likely feel the need (like I do) to immediately insert yourself into that gym's strength hierarchy... and you might come to find that your gym isn't the local end all, be all of strong motherfuckers in the area.<br />
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If the gym in Todd Schorr's mind was open to the public, I would be the first motherfucker on the planet to sign up for a membership.</div>
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In short, the perfect gym is likely out there, but it exists between your ears. Hell, even athletes who own badass gyms like <a href="https://www.facebook.com/KCBarbell/?eid=ARDtjyvHEZFxUvjDF49JMmMqdvBG4nSOA-lXzESjEQ-BwMQ43SSBXGT1qoGZD_X9k-j3ucK48x1T53ty&timeline_context_item_type=intro_card_work&timeline_context_item_source=1387266431&fref=tag" target="_blank">Kansas City Barbell</a> agree- the owner, Jay, told me that his best experiences lifting were not at his own gym but at the old Worlds Gym in Reading, PA, because he was lifting with a pro Highland Games competitor and a dude who played in NFL Europe and every training session was beyond ball-out. Equipment isn't holding you back when you train- your mind is. The gym isn't the problem- you are. Greatness is within your grasp, but you've got to be your own salvation. Keep an eye out for the people who train fucking hard- not the Instagram dipshits constantly filming every fucking thing for the internet, and not the fuckers who foam roll for an hour before they train (incidentally, I will be gassing those motherfuckers my first day in office as overlord of post-apocalyptic America). All of that shit is window dressing to disguise the fact they're not there to train, but to preen. Forge your own path and own your shit rather than placing your destiny in the hands of strangers, whether they be on Facebook or the owners of your gym or anyone else. And remember, <span style="text-align: center;">The perfect gym is not a physical location but a mental one, formed out of your mindset, desire, and drive. Build one worthy of attaching to a drinking hall in Valhalla, because the alternative is dying unremembered. </span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com13tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-47944844250377173352018-11-23T21:26:00.000-05:002018-12-10T10:39:46.779-05:00[Full Fucking Redux] Baddest Motherfuckers Ever- Benny "I Live In a Fucking Cave" Podda<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b style="color: red;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">When I first penned this article, there was little in the way of info on Benny Podda, and what I could find seemed to be as much fiction as fact. Turns out, however, that my sole source for information wasn't off the mark- more recent stuff, in addition to a read of Bill Romanowski's biography, confirmed the utterly maniacal shit I'd read. As it was nearly ten years old, I thought it might bear a bit of an update in form and content, so here is my heavily revised redux of my third BME... and holy fuck, I've been doing this for almost ten years.</span></b></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And because I know that I dropped the beginning of a series and then nothing for two months, rest assured the remainder of the "Feast and Famine" series has been written and is in the process of being typed up. I actually hand wrote so much shit in the last quarter of the year that it is taking two people weeks to type it. In short, there will be plenty for you to read in the coming months- I've been a busy motherfucker.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In the past I've been asked why I focus so heavily on the outliers in the strength community, rather than the more conventional lifters who've had success over the years in a more reserved fashion. The answer is quite frankly, that greatness and boring rarely coincide, and where they do it is more coincidence than a causal relationship. The clock-punching Rudy-style workhorse who starts at the bottom with no talent and achieves marginal success from a refusal to give up and a no-shucks-given attitude only inspires pussies to continue being pussies. Moreover, they're fucking boring, and succeeded not because of their utter lack of personality but in spite of it. I'd go so far as to say I despise those people, because they convince the weak sauce posers in the lifting community that they belong in the presence of titans simply because they take the same supplements and wear similar clothes.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Fuck that noise- it's the Benny Poddas of the world who are the humans to be admired and emulated. Not in deed but in spirit- in the refusal to take the easy road to mediocrity, in the desire to be the shot heard round the world rather than some fitsperation douche in melon colored joggers. People who find the average human to be fucking disgusting and aren't afraid to show it, because normality is a disease to be avoided by anyone with a scintilla of a desire to be someone who shall be remembered by successive generations.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Lest you think that I am simply holding aloft a pack of weightlifting sideshow freaks as people to emulate, you needn't- these dudes weren't simply weird and violent for the sake of being weird and violent. They were weird and violent because it was in their nature to be that way, and that nature is what propelled them to the top levels of bodybuilding and the upper echelon of elite strength. Follow in their footsteps or don't- I don't give a fuck. just know that the road less traveled is definitely the more interesting one, and the one from which there is the most to be learned. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b>: 5'6"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b>: 215 - 255lbs</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>: 850lbs x 1 rep; 315lbs x 50 reps, FOR FIVE SETS </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b>: 800lbs </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bent Row</b> (for reps): 500lbs</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Bar balanced on throat, no hands, for more than a minute</b>: 415lbs</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Just the fact that the last bit could be included is a testament to how fucking awesome and ridiculous Benny Podda was in his prime. The man's life is like a Warner Brothers cartoon come to life and turned X-rated. He's trained elite athletes and blockbuster actors, shunned the spotlight more than he's sought it, and combined more esoterica into a single cohesive (at least to him) training methodology and lifestyle than even Bruce Lee considered doing. </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Benny Podda out-weirded dudes in bodybuilding at a time when those dudes lived on Nubain and cocaine, claiming crazy superpowers like vampirism in bodybuilding contests that featured everything from Lilliputians to maniacs who'd jump offstage screaming because they broke both ankles (like Mike Quinn) but would get high fives rather than medical attention to Jimmy "The Iron Bull" Pellechia's outrageous strength stunts <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sRuUD_sqMYQ&t=55s" target="_blank">consisting of moving massive poundages over short ranges of motion with a lot of help from spotters and a ton of body English</a>.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large; text-align: left;">"You know that feeling when you're blowing your load?" he asks. "Instead of letting that go out, you reverse the whole</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;"> thing. It feels like your body is on fucking FIRE! I lift weights with that [energy] coursing through my body and my ticking testosterone a thousand-times normal--'cause I just fucked myself." Then he smiles calmly. "See? That's why I can hang 220 pounds from my fuckin' nuts.</span><span style="font-size: large;">"</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Frankly, I've no idea if it helps or hurts to list the weirdest bits about Benny first. Redditors would argue that it hurts, due to the fact they think his eccentricity discredits his entire methodology. Given that I'm inclined to do the exact opposite of whatever Reddit says, I'll begin with what I consider to be the best parts about a guy who likely warmed up with the best lifts r/weightroom has ever posted as max attempts.</span></div>
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<li><b>He lives in a fucking cave. That's right, a cave.</b></li>
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<blockquote style="text-align: left;">
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"To get to Benny's cave, you must first go to a remote waterfall to be purified. This is especially important for first-timers. You don't want the cave to reject you--when this happens, it induces terror. "Your soul is <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_9">rended</span> from your body in a spiritual tear," Benny explains. So, you suffer the pain and indignities of purification. The water pours down on you with the shocking force of spiritual flagellation. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">The cave's climate is reminiscent of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_10">Podda's</span> Pittsburgh: hotter than hell in the summer, freezing cold in the winter. The cave has been inhabited for thousands of years, Benny says, and it leads to an outdoor amphitheater with perfect acoustics that can only be reached via the cave. 'The opening is a vaginal orifice. In initiation ceremonies, the <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_11">Cahuilla</span> would pass through it one by one to be 'reborn' as warriors'" (O'Connell).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQkgAGE_j1joyCGv80UV-CHAf9OO-u2V5aTTm6U1PHgwxIdsHiaIkFl45wE7-egliWJdjAD2UpKcvJmS6f7B3xgWM8cLC1fOOeit_asWcFqVr5BkQ6LAaaIJKPYJUKecKtR630FxVIitKI/s1600/Photographing+Benny+Podda++the+Bodybuilder+Turned+Martial+Artist+Turned+Cave+Dwelling+Medicine+Man+++VICE+Sports+%25281%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="469" data-original-width="1077" height="278" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQkgAGE_j1joyCGv80UV-CHAf9OO-u2V5aTTm6U1PHgwxIdsHiaIkFl45wE7-egliWJdjAD2UpKcvJmS6f7B3xgWM8cLC1fOOeit_asWcFqVr5BkQ6LAaaIJKPYJUKecKtR630FxVIitKI/s640/Photographing+Benny+Podda++the+Bodybuilder+Turned+Martial+Artist+Turned+Cave+Dwelling+Medicine+Man+++VICE+Sports+%25281%2529.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<li><b>He takes training like an escaped mental patient to an entirely different level.</b> </li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Forget Intensity or Insanity, Blood and Guts, and all of the other rhabdo-inducing, man-killer regimes of which you've heard. Podda's methodology makes all of that shit look like the produce of a bottom-tier USAPL lifter's mind... if you discount the fact that information on the Mongols' training techniques is, at best, </span><i>extremely</i><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> scanty.</span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Philosophically, Benny merges German <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_13">Sturm</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_14">und</span> <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_15">Drang</span>, Eastern asceticism and a lot of other really weird shit. "My physical training is based on the philosophies of Genghis Khan," Benny says. "He taught his troops the importance of exterior and interior training. His warriors learned how to turn themselves inside out so that they could project their inner power out like lightning" (O'Connell). </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQh-VO6q-Bev8Dspo2MHm1tZHg426M1RFWBceqzcIRLrfQpMuwrwmJQFUs_oZT90UMrw7vlBqQ2BIM0J8MRgOgS1Omf-hRdof68WbpljXGKLpRw3YFXp6bpoIwJ6vv9OuLEBsiWGrf2mqy/s1600/c9fac713d16544717048d0fad9bf3cf629be089b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="425" data-original-width="355" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQh-VO6q-Bev8Dspo2MHm1tZHg426M1RFWBceqzcIRLrfQpMuwrwmJQFUs_oZT90UMrw7vlBqQ2BIM0J8MRgOgS1Omf-hRdof68WbpljXGKLpRw3YFXp6bpoIwJ6vv9OuLEBsiWGrf2mqy/s1600/c9fac713d16544717048d0fad9bf3cf629be089b.jpg" /></a></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>His psych up methods make even WSM-era Kaz look like a vanilla chai latte sipping vegan men's physique competitor</b>. </span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">He once ran straight through a wall, Wile E. Coyote-style, to psych himself up for a heavy lift. In another fit of apparent Super Saiyanism, Benny ran full tilt into a lineman from the Pittsburgh Steelers, who was not lifting but talking on a pay phone. Not only did this early predecessor to crowdkilling crush CYC's best efforts to date just on their face, but Podda managed not only to knock a 285 lb man who benched over 600lbs ass over teakettle, but he </span><b><i>headbutted</i></b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> him with such force that the pay phone was ripped out of the fucking wall.</span></span></blockquote>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>He had a bizarre pharmacological and <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_19">herbological</span> regimen that led to shit like this</b>:</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Fueled by everything from the visualization techniques of <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_20">Vipasanna</span> Buddhism to anabolic steroids and herbal concoctions that he drank from root-filled mayonnaise jars, Benny trained like a human wrecking ball. <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_21">Manion</span> recalls walking into his establishment one day and seeing Benny doing reps with his head wrapped in a blood-drenched towel, others scattered nearby. "The cable had snapped on a long cable-row machine and the handle had hit him on the head," recalls <span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_22">Manion</span>. "He had to keep replacing the towels when they got soaked with blood. I made a guy take him to the hospital, and it took 12 stitches to close the open wound in his head" (O'Connell).</span></blockquote>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>He <span class="blsp-spelling-corrected" id="SPELLING_ERROR_23">transcends</span> every possible conception of what is "cool," "possible," or "human," and shows just how fucking brutal people can be if they stop letting society dictate what their behavior should be, think for themselves, and not be afraid to try shit that is so far out of the box they've forgotten what boxes look like.</b> </span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"I have seen Benny break bricks with magazines, crush coconuts with his bare hands, squirt blood out of his nose, and swing 225 pounds from his testicles. This is NOT Benny being crazy, this is him transferring energy and power to accomplish what he wants accomplished. He puts himself in a state of mind that defies any normal brain patterns you and I may have which gives him the ability to do these abnormal things, like take a 2x4 to the gut and smile while doing it. When Benny was doing his body building contests, he would invite a couple people from the audience to come up and hit him with 2x4's while he did his routine. Nothing is normal with Benny, normal is boring to him" (O'Connell).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwOhInILBmzdXshkwvg7LqlupeatXbS0Cua8laxBDqjIr_B5lJ54l6JNUqRVzG766YkWsy3ds4-EU5Oz6_nrVi6yT54x3uF_Y5H9XqfRx5YIMCC4z8sgXgdx3l447EKZ-7pgylbYHdblwi/s1600/Photographing+Benny+Podda++the+Bodybuilder+Turned+Martial+Artist+Turned+Cave+Dwelling+Medicine+Man+++VICE+Sports.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="530" data-original-width="374" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgwOhInILBmzdXshkwvg7LqlupeatXbS0Cua8laxBDqjIr_B5lJ54l6JNUqRVzG766YkWsy3ds4-EU5Oz6_nrVi6yT54x3uF_Y5H9XqfRx5YIMCC4z8sgXgdx3l447EKZ-7pgylbYHdblwi/s1600/Photographing+Benny+Podda++the+Bodybuilder+Turned+Martial+Artist+Turned+Cave+Dwelling+Medicine+Man+++VICE+Sports.png" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Quite frankly, with a laundry list of violent peculiarities like that, you'd assume some sort of fittingly comic-bookesque backstory, like the man was raised in the weight room of an insane asylum by a kindly, elderly Chinese orderly and his trained attack monkeys. Tragically, it was nothing so interesting, and no one could have predicted upon Podda's birth the path his life would take. Born in a tiny mining town east of Pittsburgh into an old bootlegging family, Podda's boredom in a small town led to his involvement in a variety of extra legal activities that definitiely included car theft and possibly included acting as muscle for local mobsters. What the mob was doing in Bumblefuck, Pennsylvania is absolutely anyone's guess, but that allegedly led to Benny being sent to China to live with a family friend for five years. Given that we had neither travel nor trade with Nixon until the mid-to-late 1970s, that story is almost certainly bullshit. What definitely did happen is that <i>Benny acted like a complete fucking maniac and tried to rob a pharmacy with a goddamned bow and arrow</i>. He was apparently shot in that failed attempt at stone age weaponry to secure painkillers, and landed his happy ass in prison.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Substitute the a couple of letters after the "S" and swap a blind kid in a hospital for a murderous psychopath in solitary confinement and this could be a case of art imitating life, because Stick wasn't introduced until 1981 and Podda might've met The Swan in the 1970s.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Prison only served to make the already batshit Benny even stranger, and in a story seemingly lifted right out of a Daredevil comic book Podda was taught to master his chi by a man in solitary confinement known as "The Swan"... after beating his cellmate half to death with a food tray. While Podda mastered his chi he apparently spent long hours reading various esoterica like the</span></span> Bhagavad Gita, and he emerged from jail even more peculiar than he was when he entered. Nevertheless, he went on to nab a football scholarship at the University of Richmond, where he majored in biochemistry, but he ended up doing more drinking than training and studying and was expelled. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">At some point in this story, Benny Podda started lifting, and he discovered he was a fucking badass at it. After dabbling in powerlifting he gravitated toward bodybuilding, and became a legend in the East Coast bodybuilding scene for his psychotic training style and zany posing routines. Benny knew he lacked the classic lines of the pretty boys of that era like Mohommed Makkawwy, Chris Dickerson, and Samir Bannout, so he went the other way and tried to drive his black-hole-dense physique to the limits of thickness and vascularity. Doing that, however, required him to take it to the fucking extreme... which to Benny seems to have meant that he had to live in a </span>small, windowless room with nothing but a cot and a stack of books. Apparently, his "Spartan lifestyle was a purposeful attempt to avoid distractions from his goals. So devoted was he to his goals that “The Beast” would wake up three hours before his 6:30 AM workout to perform Taoist meditation" (Colescott). By the time he got onstage, Benny was completely unhinged, and his performances reflected his mental state- he'd flex so hard blood would spurt out of his fucking nose, rock Wolfman masks, and do other bizarre shit, including the one time he hung himself for 5 straight minutes and then lifted his head and gave the audience the finger before cutting himself down. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If only Tim Belknap had enjoyed spelunking- we might have been treated to such awesome training vids that Jujumufu would have been beyond derivative when he hit Youtube.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Eventually, Benny came to the same realization that whacked other awesome bodybuilders of the 1980s in the face like a like a UFC fighter's fist in the face of a crazy hot porn star- the more brutal a bodybuilder, the less marketable they were. As such, all of the most interesting guys with the most effective training techniques and the craziest physiques were shunned by the mags, and he hung up his trunks alongside badasses like Tim Belknap, Tom Platz, and Jusup Wilcosz. With that, Podda decided to live like Riddick in complete solitude with only a mountain lion as his companion for an extended period of time. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"When we got to the cave Benny told me stories about the nights he'd spend there, the peyote he would eat, how people would bring him stuff from town, and how he'd talk to the spirits. You'd go inside the cave and it opened to an auditorium type of thing where it almost looked like [a place] where a band would play. He said the spirits would sing to him, talk to him, and they'd chase him through the catacombs of rocks. He slept with a rock as his pillow, people would come bring him food, cases of beer—I remember him talking about the beer as one of his luxuries. He'd train at the cave, lifting rocks and doing spiritual types of things. He broke his ankle when he lived there, getting chased through the rocks by the spirits and stuff. Instead of going to the hospital, he'd heal it by walking through deep sand that he said was over 200 degrees and the heat from the sand would heal his ankle. I stuck my hand in the sand and I couldn't even keep it in for a second because it was so hot" (Harder).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span>Nor was this some kind of retarded, Instagrammed, Millennial attention whoring adventure- he took his duties as a priest of the fucking Sand People more seriously than the CDC would take a case of someone cracking out from ebola in the middle of an Olympic stadium.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"Podda had recently undergone a fasting and training regimen that carved an approximate and deliberate 60 pounds off his stocky frame. At that time,excess muscularity impeded his duties as a priest, and Podda shed the bulk as a part of an overall spiritual and physical transformation. He spoke of a functional “second anatomy,” in essence a literal and dormant suit of muscle that can be “worn” or “removed” virtually at will, which exists “inside” his physiology and is readily available in many different guises. After a time, Podda returned to his muscular ways and gained an approximate 85 pounds of lean bodyweight within several months. This is hard to imagine and more difficult to believe, but in the world of the Podda, anything is possible" (Skipton).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It was from this cave that Benny operated as he became a trainer, and from which we gain a bit of insight into what his methodology actually is. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZqqMX-TRLWikT1iu-_LRhmwR3XI_RL7quTZBTblOvIK00dsLno4HmtncYCDzrhe_ckxb0fM6L6rjpPCogweA1Veks2cRDKLXDBfGsUWJ9J7T-xuMO5MC3Z1cthdHkZVOwdextdlMP0Mlk/s1600/nrh1k_2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="556" data-original-width="739" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjZqqMX-TRLWikT1iu-_LRhmwR3XI_RL7quTZBTblOvIK00dsLno4HmtncYCDzrhe_ckxb0fM6L6rjpPCogweA1Veks2cRDKLXDBfGsUWJ9J7T-xuMO5MC3Z1cthdHkZVOwdextdlMP0Mlk/s400/nrh1k_2.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Wandy and Benny would definitely get along.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">As I've mentioned, Podda's workouts were like old school Wanderlei Silva fights- they were bloody-as-fuck, attack-from-every-conceivable-angle affairs that likely seemed longer to the meat being pounded upon than they were. Yeah, that sounds like a euphemism for masturbating, but as Podda seemed keen on mentioning load dropping at every possible opportunity, he'd likely consider that unintentional double entendre apt. One of his most famous clients was Chuck Norris, who was always in good shape but never what anyone would consider a muscle-bound beast at 5'10" and 155lbs. Known more for his presciently hyper-tight jeans that allowed him to kick any motherfucker in the face Norris wanted and his voluminous, glorious chest hair than his pecs, the only person in history who can divide by zero decided to level up from Jack LaLanne to Sylvester Stallone, and decided Benny Podda was the man to do it.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">"'I didn't know who the fuck Chuck Norris was and didn't give a fuck,' says Benny. 'They took me up to his house and we hit it off because I pounded the fucking guy. I yelled at him, 'Kick me in the fucking chest as hard as you can!' He's like, 'No, I shouldn't.' So I berated the fucker until he did it--and I didn't budge when he did."</span> </span></blockquote>
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<iframe allow="accelerometer; autoplay; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/SfT-Jg8-0aY" width="560"></iframe>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If I am not mistaken, that's Podda spotting Norris on what appears to be a hilariously Brad Castleberry-style 425lb incline bench in <i>The Hero and the Terror.</i></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">What resulted was a Norris who looked far more like an ass-kicking rogue cop than an extra from a 70s porn film, and it was due to Podda's realization than Norris was basically doing a bodybuilding show every two weeks for the movie, so he peaked Norris accordingly. Ever the innovator, Podda's peaking method is like nothing you've ever seen. It consisted of supersets to which an extra exercise was added on each set, transforming the superset into a triset and then a giant set, all the while fueled by less calories than you'd feed a six year old. For instance, here is the three day a week program he built for the workout and shirtless scenes in the film:</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0scXOQYUq0duYX0gYqullHLTOP_eNiLjjxZ1uF2BzbMwycoVXk3KjWsKcIfxWNKoDt0fSKKd-Zj7V6YU6kfgLXP7jRHw0Dvn02oUSH8LMiuQytoiso_ep9uhWpiFAQyPQsotON7e-9MI_/s1600/norris.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="608" data-original-width="1080" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0scXOQYUq0duYX0gYqullHLTOP_eNiLjjxZ1uF2BzbMwycoVXk3KjWsKcIfxWNKoDt0fSKKd-Zj7V6YU6kfgLXP7jRHw0Dvn02oUSH8LMiuQytoiso_ep9uhWpiFAQyPQsotON7e-9MI_/s640/norris.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Set 1: <b>Incline Bench Press + Flat Bench Flyes</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Set 2: <b>Incline Bench Press + Flat Bench Flyes + Dips</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Set 3: <b>Incline Bench Press + Flat Bench Flyes + Dips + Vertical Chest Press Machine</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">(The same weights are used for all three sets and all sets are done to failure)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u><br /></u></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Shoulders</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Set 1: <b>Overhead Machine Press + Upright Rows</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Set 2: <b>Overhead Machine Press + Upright Rows + Dumbbell Laterals</b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">(He only included two sets here because the shoulders were pre-fatigued from chest work)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Triceps</u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Pushdowns</b>- 12 back-to-back sets of this exercise, beginning with a light weight for six reps, then adding 20lbs each set until reaching failure at or before six reps, then cascading back down and doing each weight to failure. That sounds fucking horrific and awesome, all at the same time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Grip Bench Press</b>- Though he didn't say so, I am guessing this is done on the Smith Machine with the same method as the pushdowns.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Back</u> (According to Podda, Chuck could not develop back width prior to using this routine)</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Chins supersetted with T-Bar Rows</b>- 3x10 (all reps done slowly and very strictly, pulling as high as humanly possibly on the chins)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Pulldowns</b>- 3x10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Biceps</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curl</b>- 1x10 with 10RM, followed by 30 second rest, AMRAP with same weight, 30 second rest, and another AMRAP set that ends with a static hold with the arms at a ninety degree angle and elbows in tight at the sides.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><u>Abs</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Static hold with body held parallel to the ground on an incline situp board, which according to Podda "is one of the most effective and brutal abdominal exercises there is" (Podda).</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwzH_frSYNCXAHe6gU9HproC9ay59gTQHN9vgX8igskPaq0U_-wi_aNJudFQYVc8aeoPaYDXuYxANi75d7mrOCEWxVKlvup6km4YAISvSpCSeJfXFMu4OKjT5jgEXfKBXjordrqDVhzBQQ/s1600/CHUCK+NORRIS+HERO+AND+THE+TERROR++1988+Stock+Photo++31022044+++Alamy.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="538" data-original-width="792" height="434" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwzH_frSYNCXAHe6gU9HproC9ay59gTQHN9vgX8igskPaq0U_-wi_aNJudFQYVc8aeoPaYDXuYxANi75d7mrOCEWxVKlvup6km4YAISvSpCSeJfXFMu4OKjT5jgEXfKBXjordrqDVhzBQQ/s640/CHUCK+NORRIS+HERO+AND+THE+TERROR++1988+Stock+Photo++31022044+++Alamy.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Chuck, on set, wondering how many calories are in chrome, because motherfucker he must've been starving.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">And the diet to fuel that workout, which also consisted of three days of running or biking per week, was 1200 bland-as-fuck calories a day of turkey breast, egg whites, potatoes, and whole grains in a 60% CHO, 30% PRO, 10% FAT split. Though it sounds like a fucking nightmare, that was pretty standard for that era- if you adjust the calories for a 200lber, you're looking at a whopping 1550 calories a day. It's no wonder Chuck never trained legs- not only did he lack the flex fabric technology for jeans we now enjoy, but there's little chance of getting in a decent leg workout on that calorie level without a 1980's style Colombian preworkout. In any event, Podda had this to say about the program:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">"This diet consists of about 1200 calories a day; 75-100 grams of protein, 220 grams of carbohydrates and between 25 and 30 grams of fat. The diet goes on for two weeks, with a small carbohydrate deprivation cycle two days before the peaking date, to drain water from the subcutaneous tissue. Then we have Chuck taking carbohydrates every three hours to fill himself back up to make the skin and muscle as tight as possible for the peak time. It's all designed to peak on the day the scene is shot" (Podda).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv7LX1iP3kYlYyurf2Bd4o-T61HCOsmdms6v7beBJ_0X3LC5joCoNKcmYMo-6YBR3-8j4WnbwDYsqEC67c181az7Hl6k4836bBR4uos7R6JAqbOnHp6wKgo9JaVx24ZnnqEqngobHWnFCI/s1600/norris+ferrigno.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="426" data-original-width="540" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhv7LX1iP3kYlYyurf2Bd4o-T61HCOsmdms6v7beBJ_0X3LC5joCoNKcmYMo-6YBR3-8j4WnbwDYsqEC67c181az7Hl6k4836bBR4uos7R6JAqbOnHp6wKgo9JaVx24ZnnqEqngobHWnFCI/s1600/norris+ferrigno.jpg" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Benny Podda being Benny Podda, he remained friends with Chuck Norris after the filming for <i>The Hero and the Terror</i> but shrunk from the spotlight, allowing notoriously prickish Lou Ferrigno to pick up where he left off and train Norris for <i>Delta Force 2</i>. As he once said, "I have an intense aversion to conventional notions of success," and he apparently took that shit seriously. Nevertheless, he did train a couple of other celebrities, and got a ton of good press for packing 50lbs onto the worst parented, over-coached, burned out and now horribly meth addicted felon Todd Marinovich before the draft, leading him to a first round draft selection in the NFL and one of the saddest bust stories this side of JaMarcus Russell. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">It's not often that a nose tackle makes the cover of a bodybuilding mag... unless, of course, he has Benny Podda as his trainer.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Though Marinovich ultimately turned out to be a useless pile of tweaker trash, Podda made such an impression with Marinovich's physical transformation from skinny junkie into the quarterback who was chosen before Hall of Fame quarterback Brett Farve in the draft that NFL super-agent Tom Conlon started recommending him to everyone he could. One of those someones was Hall of Fame quarterback Joe Montana, who had been plagued with a nagging hamstring injury that left him basically crippled. Utilizing a mix of insanity, Eastern medicine, and apparent sorcery, Podda had Montana playing golf within hours and starting at quarterback the following Sunday. Likewise, he fixed San Diego wide receiver Curtis Conway's nagging knee injury, which had kept him out of a couple of games with that same blend of who-the-fuck-knows-what. According to Bill Romanowski, "after a few of sessions with Benny, Curtis was back on the track, and screaming "OH MY GOD!" Perhaps the most ringing endorsement Podda received from an NFL player came from defensive tackle Bill Maas (the goof on the cover of the bodybuilding rag pictured above), who hired Podda in the offseason and was so floored by his physical improvements he called Conlon one night and said, "Hey Condo. This guy Benny Podda? I think he's... Jesus Christ."</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">If Benny's story sounds somewhat reminiscent of Mas Oyama's, I think it's because Benny liked Mas's style, rather than just lifting his stories outright. That's not to say I entirely believe the Benny stories about fighting in Bloodsport-style deathmatches in the Orient in the early 1980s, however- I think the legend of Frank Dux might've bled into Benny's at some point in the retelling.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Benny's programming for these guys was all over the fucking place, as one might imagine. Though he'd competed in powerlifting and was well known at Jim Manion's Pittsburgh bodybuilding mecca of a gym to be superhumanly strong, he was just as, if not more likely to recommend training more in line with Mas Oyama's mountain training than bodybuilding or powerlifting methods, and he tailored his clients' training to their individual needs rather than forcing them to adapt to his methods. As such, Benny's training rarely matched that of his clients', and his clients' programs were all unique. As such, he'd have champion martial artists Chuck Norris sweating in the gym, while his high school basketball stars would be outside in the mountains, lifting giant logs, climbing cliffs, and running on railroad ties to improve balance and coordination.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I've no idea how much credit Podda got for Romo's arms, but if any part of those things were Podda's doing, we should all pay attention.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">By far and away, Benny's most vocal supporter was one of the most violent defensive players ever to play professional football, Bill Romanowski. When Romo hired Benny, he was already one of the most assiduous trainers, dieters, and supplement takers in professional sports. Romo helped build the supplement juggernaut EAS in the 1990's and was well-known for carrying a fishing tackle box full of supplements and gear everywhere he went, and meeting Benny just ramped up the insanity. Podda ranted and raved about Romo's food choices (he was eating like a 1990's bodybuilder) as if he was a teenager living on junk food. In a rampage that would presage the end of their working relationship (Romo's wife couldn't stand Podda), Podda essentially tossed all of the shit in Romo's kitchen and replaced it with fertile eggs, steak, and enough weird Chinese herbs that Romo could have opened up his own Chinese apothecary. The eggs were of particular importance because, according to Podda, they contained "energy, life, little dots of blood- the dots that turned into little chickens." </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">This woman could diet for the SI Swimsuit issue cover and live with a genuine lunatic... but thought Benny Podda was just too goddamned unhinged to be hanging around her house.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Romo was the kind of psychopath Podda could work with- he had been fined for all kinds of on-field shenanigans like stomping downed players, breaking fingers in fumble piles, and spitting in opponents' faces, and once broke one of his teammate's faces with a single punch in practice. Romo was so crazy and violent even his teammates feared him, but it was that kind of crazy that earned him four Super Bowl rings and two Pro Bowl appearances, and he credited the shit he learned from Benny Podda with helping with that and being invaluable in Romo starting in an unheard-of 243 consecutive games. The intensity with which those two approached Romo's training and diet completely surpassed anything anyone else could tolerate, however, and Romo ended up moving on to less psychotic trainers after working with Podda for a while.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Although their working history was tragically short, Romo still ended up with a laundry list of weird Chinese supplements gives us some idea of what Podda himself uses. Though this list is sort of uninspiring, Romo swears that this shit is all essential.</span></span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.pureformulas.com/dynamic-warrior-1-oz-by-kan-herbs.html" target="_blank">Dynamic Warrior stack</a>- Appears to be for general health and kidney support</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.walmart.com/ip/Dr-Shen-s-Yin-Chiao-Cold-Flu-Relief-Tablets-90-Ct/26967248?adid=22222222254418684945&wmlspartner=wmtlabs&wl0=b&wl1=g&wl2=c&wl3=291938340609&wl4=dsa-504748227745&wl5=2662&wl6=&wl7=9003947&wl8=&veh=sem&gclid=Cj0KCQiAxNnfBRDwARIsAJlH29C4orT40YEmHht96Ef0VKM3ZDPa3fQ65sEWrBvvSxYq5g5xcS7Nyj8aAld0EALw_wcB" target="_blank">Yin chiao</a>- Cold and flu</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Gan-Mao-Ling-Plum-Flower/dp/B000VZW2PA?th=1" target="_blank">Gan mao ling</a>- Cold and flu</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.ebay.com/itm/Dr-SHENS-Zong-Gan-Ling-Herbs-for-Advanced-Colds-750mg-90-Tabs/264033526686?epid=1700564851&hash=item3d799fe39e:g:tk8AAOSwy-5b0e~S:rk:1:pf:0" target="_blank">Zhong gan ling</a>- Cold and flu... how many colds did these two fucking get?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Pian-Nose-Inflammation-Pills-Tablets/dp/B002OTRBV6" target="_blank">Bi yan pian</a>- Anti-inflammatory for sinuses</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.euyansang.com/en_US/under-the-weather/cough/mild-hot-cough-san-she-dan-chun-bei-mo-955764733504.html" target="_blank">San she dan</a>- More cough and cold shit.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ligusticum_porteri" target="_blank">Osha root</a>- A mood enhancer known as loveroot because it makes bears nuzzle each other. Only Benny Podda would have known this.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Minh mang- tragically, this is the one by which Podda apparently swore and Romo loved, yet I cannot find any information on it anywhere. It's named after a legendary Vietnamese emperor who advocated the slaughter of Christian missionaries and fathered 142 kids by 43 women, so I'd guess whatever it was it increased aggression and testosterone. Maybe it was a euphemism for <a href="https://www.steroidal.com/steroid-profiles/cheque-drops-mibolerone/" target="_blank">Cheque Drops</a>? </span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">I don't give a fuck if you like bodybuilding or not- if this doesn't entertain you, little will.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">In short, Benny Podda was a fucking enigma- we're not sure precisely how he trained, but we know he trained hard as shit and unconventionally, and he was strong as fuck as a result. We don't know what his diet was like but we can guess, and we know he scoured the Earth for the most effective pharmacological aids, both narcotic and non-narcotic. Of all of the people in the history of training, Podda was likely the most dedicated to his craft and the most innovative in the pursuit of excellence, and his example should stand as one of the most interesting and compelling of all of the lifters in the zeitgeist. Additionally, the story of Benny Podda is one we should all heed- being an anomaly might not always work in one's favor, nor will it always bring financial success. By all accounts, however, Benny is completely happy with his body of work and the cave-dwelling lifestyle he currently enjoys. And even more than that, Benny Podda will be remembered long after he's dead, and that is the closest thing to immortality one can achieve. The people who stick to well traveled paths, on the other hand, make no impact on the world- they live safe, unoffensive, uninteresting lives and are gladly consigned to the dustbin of history without leaving a mark on the world. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>"The world of tradition is dying," Benny laments. "When the last flame goes out, that's when you have apocalypse--like the great flood, the Black Plague, earthquakes and nuclear war. It'll make World War II and the dropping of the atom bombs look like nothing. But as long as one person keeps the flame alive, a complete cataclysm can be avoided."</b></span></blockquote>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">BenShea, Adam. Benny Podda: Muscle Man, Medicine Man, and Martial Artist. JoshStrength. 24 Jun 2018. </span>Web. 17 Nov 2018. <a href="http://blog.joshstrength.com/2018/06/benny-podda-muscle-man-medicine-man-and-martial-artist/">http://blog.joshstrength.com/2018/06/benny-podda-muscle-man-medicine-man-and-martial-artist/</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Colescott, Steve. The hardcore twelve. AtLarge Nutrition. 28 Nov 2009. Web. 19 Nov 2018. <a href="https://atlargenutrition.com/the-hardcore-twelve/">https://atlargenutrition.com/the-hardcore-twelve/</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Harder, Jeff. Photographing Benny Podda, the bodybuilder turned martial artist turned cave-dwelling medicine man. Vice Sports. 23 Jul 2017. Web. 19 Nov 2018. <a href="https://sports.vice.com/en_au/article/9kwv37/photographing-benny-podda-the-bodybuilder-turned-martial-artist-turned-cave-dwelling-medicine-man">https://sports.vice.com/en_au/article/9kwv37/photographing-benny-podda-the-bodybuilder-turned-martial-artist-turned-cave-dwelling-medicine-man</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">McLeod, Paul. Trainers. Los Angeles Times. 15 Oct 1996. Web. 19 Nov 2018. <a href="http://articles.latimes.com/1996-10-15/news/ss-54017_1_personal-trainers/2">http://articles.latimes.com/1996-10-15/news/ss-54017_1_personal-trainers/2</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">O'Connell, Jeff and Steve Stiefel. Wild Thing. HighBeam Research, reprinted from Men's Fitness. 1 Nov 2004. Web. 19 Nov 2018. <a href="https://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-124007834.html">https://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-124007834.html</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Podda, Benny. Training Chuck Norris. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 4 Dec 2016. Web. 19 Nov 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2016/12/training-chuck-norris-benny-podda-1989.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2016/12/training-chuck-norris-benny-podda-1989.html</a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Romanowski, Bill. <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Romo-Living-Dreams-Slaying-Dragons/dp/006115217X" target="_blank">Romo: My Life on the Edge: Living Dreams and Slaying Dragons</a>. New York: Harper, 2005.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue" , "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Skipton, Todd W. From beast to priest: the transformation of Benny Podda. Excerpt from <i>Raising a Man</i>. Ebook, 2010.</span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-6434662476747735442018-09-11T06:57:00.000-04:002018-11-30T14:04:59.508-05:00The Feast, Famine, And Ferocity Diet, Part 1<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Hunger Burns the Fat Off Man’s Soul</span></b></h2>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Food has never been more readily available, consistently healthy, or instantly accessible than the era in which we now live. Even in the mythical Judeo-Christian utopia called “The Garden of Eden”, a land of such bounty that early humans had to do nothing more than reach over their heads and pick low hanging fruit to sate their hunger, man lacked the 24/7/365 access to Chimichurri-drenched T-Bone steaks and <a href="http://www.lorenzoandsons.com/" target="_blank">pizza slices the size of a grown man’s torso</a> that modern humans enjoy in the Western World.</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-9460d2e6-7fff-ae98-0a76-43fe8f61836b"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="250" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/ZnIxU1cntIw-5XhZOZT_9R_L1P_kMeFUzP4CUW7AAIbzls110q0oRKc7gk-xNTJZBaxEk4pEX3O_dmde0mMsL9mP1vw5hWl5Fdjll37dovJR9w61cjYC_YDEuwX-8UnMKkVM5mrq" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="250" /></span></span></div>
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<span style="color: magenta; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(Tara Edit - Yes, the pizza’s really are that big at Lorenzo and Son’s on South Street, Philadelphia. Jamie has NEVER had the joy that is their pizza, I on the other hand most assuredly have, and nearly dumped him when I found out all the times he had gone to South St. he’d never eaten there. Lame!)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In time’s past, Man’s food supply alternated between surplus and deficit, surfeit and dearth, and <a href="https://www.goldencorral.com/" target="_blank">Golden Corral</a> ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT-BUFFET feasts and “<a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M9BNoNFKCBI" target="_blank">We Are the World</a>” famines from season to season and this is the cycle to which the human body is more accustomed than Midwestern Hobos were to being raped by Carl Panzram on long train rides.</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-ab45993e-7fff-aa6d-11e8-7f51aefbffa1"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="222" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/aASBs2qBddlCIh8G8JY1Zvrp5wRcmQLr9KHh4x6UZC2EsvNAfTi0yPolQobIHzmkxuxnEfRSsf3ltNcaSjssUR_nNNdUkSJvrn2_JHvT_Qbup6d_BHt3bsyW4TSnFqrhTlomfRH9" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Likes: Raping hobos and milk steak</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dislikes: People’s knees</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">These periods of insufficiency or famine are a metabolic necessity for some, such as the Native American tribes of the American Southwest, for whom modern food convenience is more of a death sentence than blessing. Type II Diabetes plagues them like thanatomorphose does Ukrainian junkies, and the reason behind it is that their bodies are genetically programmed to store body fat in times of plenty. All humans, in fact, are designed to do so, which is noteworthy because we’re the only primates who bear this trait to ensure survival during Ice Ages, famine or lengthy travel into unknown lands.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Neither chimps nor gorillas could have survived the Irish Potato Famine or a Soviet Five Year Plan, and the latter will never attempt Global Domination because they will never stray that far from their food source - - To do so would mean almost certain death.</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-0b2014b3-7fff-a0f2-b78c-c146f4f253e3"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="225" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/IoSaqxbKy82s_D6VSxoK1ZwBirEBnwIKCbcrFOK3ExWXEMCOjZlQyRC_0kG3jtA8bulJN6RBD26y6A8ns20qXRgr92yp7x-fNWTP-dLDo0VL0X2xsKE64kXpbD2Jj6HWiQykgrIO" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Would have gotten mangled by Unit 731 in a match-up on Deadliest Warrior</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Certain pundits have pontificated upon the wasted potential of lifting luminaries like Hermann Goerner and Manohar Aich due to the fact that they spent years in WWI and WWII POW camps and British Colonial Detention Centers, respectively, arguing that had they not done so, they’d have gone on to far greater physical heights. Given the fact that NO ONE has yet bested some of Goener’s lifts, and Manohar Aich’s squat was so fucking massive at such a low body weight that even my superlative vocabulary lacks the hyperbolic verbiage to describe it; I would tend to disagree, especially when I consider recent years that have found me alternating between crazy personal records and insufficient calories, due to either drunkenness or incarceration. In fact the evidence seems to point to the conclusion that periods of relative famine are actually highly beneficial to lifters.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Have your doubts?</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-ba296b53-7fff-a7f2-662b-2bfe7f838c24"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="270" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/giXdUZCs5ZCdUfcIADU2_b-KzHTv-6O28VZntWZmfabJs0HfXMrb2iVH22NARBhh1cGV0T-924riQyDV5br3olkXOraeyYgLw4k20xgTKs859_jGSW2QP4-ZwJzO4NYhcUiD1U3V" style="-webkit-transform: rotate(0.00rad); border: none; transform: rotate(0.00rad);" width="480" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Anyone who’s ever been to an NA meeting just needs to look around the room to see that perpetually starving junkies get fucking HUGE when they ditch the drugs for steroids, weights and metal. Shit you don’t need to look any farther than guys like former junkie Trent Reznor and former crackhead Tom Hardy.</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">It’s understandable, at least until you consider the possibility that periods of severe undereating condition your body to utilize the maximum amount of nutrition from the food you consume. Clearly, Hermann Goerner easily regained his mass and strength, even in an utterly decimated post-war Germany… not once, but <b>FUCKING TWICE</b>, and anyone who has ever seen a dope fiend ditch their works for weights, steak, and steroids know they blow up faster than an inflatable donkey fuck-toy at a 4-H competition after-party. Likewise, bodybuilders in the 1980’s who would diet for months onn 800-1000 calories a day during contest prep, would balloon up cartoonishly in the off season, because their bodies had been conditioned over time to wring every last bit of sustenance possible out the of the astonishing tiny amount of food they were consuming.</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-46df1571-7fff-9dc2-8a6b-a0d6117e8639"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="640" src="https://lh3.googleusercontent.com/P46Zfftj4_vn-7IPU8gqkeSDNmIuD0GgZqiqSq9IiUfBPfdPt2uk_p04ANrr_x9XzFi8mLHOhlfgZXowUkGzca25IBX4NG1jpMzjvZsQ28oW1sU34fuvUpSNNMEFPSh3OOe-C6cb" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="449" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Dude should have gone Pro</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I, too, have some experience with this phenomenon ranging from cutting 20 lbs for meets in a couple of days to dropping 25 lbs in a long weekend of drinking and then gaining 35 in the subsequent month, to my current situation; slowly starving to death in a for profit jail that feeds its inmates what amounts to starvation rations. This shit-pile county (which was recently the subject of an expose in the Philadelphia Inquirer for <a href="http://www.philly.com/philly/news/crime/meek-mill-da-larry-krasner-probation-parole-philly-mass-incarceration-pennsylvania-vincent-schiraldi-columbia-university-justice-lab-20180425.html?arc404=true" target="_blank">the abuse of people on probation for minor crimes</a>, this article about <a href="http://www2.philly.com/philly/news/crime/pennsylvania-mass-incarceration-montgomery-bucks-lancaster-delaware-county-larry-krasner-prison-department-of-corrections-20180626.html" target="_blank">the RIDICULOUSLY high incarceration rates in non-urban counties</a> , this article dating back to <a href="https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2014/02/the-private-probation-problem-is-worse-than-anyone-thought/283589/" target="_blank">2014 about the for profit probation system</a>, and the <a href="http://justicelab.iserp.columbia.edu/img/PACommunityCorrections4.19.18finalv3.pdf" target="_blank">Columbia University judicial study mentioned</a> above referencing Pennsylvania’s abnormally high incarceration rates, oh and this Human Rights Watch 76 page report on the <a href="https://www.hrw.org/sites/default/files/reports/us0214_ForUpload_0.pdf" target="_blank">abuse of the for profit probation industry</a>) has a protracted “Quarantine” period, in which we are allowed roughly 1500 calories and no recreation of any kind for 14-30 days. Most inmates claim some malady that nets them enough Klonopin to sleep through that period and marvel at my staunch refusal to allow my diet to dictate my activity level, but I obviously choose to exercise compulsively and write extensively for the following reasons:</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-e988b32e-7fff-bc0d-8692-3ee32840835f"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="240" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/84gDM0Qi9Xa6uEaxqdd9yey9yq8lhrvg59cagNgWGn0ODtDDf-gbAR-no7znJzJzYa6of5NEGWKm3O9NJO3GdoJ73Mzmn3wDFx6FJYqBwrOUNi2IhBfzqs3mjXUJfrg3GUH335UK" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">The mind controls the body.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">You are not a slave</span></b></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">FUCK HUNGER!</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">If people like Manohar Aich, Hermann Goerner, and that Olympic marathoner from Unbroken <span style="color: magenta;">(Tara Edit: Louis Zamperini for those who were wondering who he meant) </span>can do it SO CAN WE FUCKING ALL (But fuck that “I forgive you for torturing me for years” bullshit the Unbroken dude was busy with).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">I know that the second I have access to a surplus of food I can overeat like a fat kid on Easter morning and I’ll blow up like George in Rampage inside of a week without adding much, if any, fat at all.</span></li>
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-31cf4028-7fff-7ea7-5aa4-eb1051cc5807"><span style="background-color: white; color: #545454; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="333" src="https://lh6.googleusercontent.com/7-RajV-Lfndm5RkUbKp8DnNWysbJ4UceFn8xlKMffTuA1IDggaK3SbLXcO5ecxwchs6tBU1fkNAvMYyeUgruCYU6syA-RxDB3G0HQ9LAF7b1hcDldKUlFiMQBYEKPAPd4utq7DZG" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Is it fun? FUCK NO. Well, maybe a little. The BDSM-Style masochist in me secretly loves the misery of dieting and training in a ridiculously hypocaloric state. I suppose it’s not much of a secret given the fact I just admitted it, but it gives me the same kind of wolf-eyed hard-on that having a Domme put me in a ball press and violently fuck my urethra with a thick ribbed sound would. Knowing you can suffer through a period of asceticism that is generally the purview of religious zealots and genuine psychopaths makes you feel hard, cruel, and unstoppable as a zombified fascist supersoldier tasked with single handedly reducing the effete modern world to rubble.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://images.sex.com/images/pinporn/2016/12/01/620/16988290.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="240" data-original-width="360" height="213" src="https://images.sex.com/images/pinporn/2016/12/01/620/16988290.gif" width="320" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="color: magenta; font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">(Tara Edit - LOOK! PORN! Finally! I know. You guys were dying without it)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">In short, this diet is going to mimic periods of feast and famine in an effort to transform your organs and musculature into what amounts to a pack of angry, armed Muslim zealots in a community that doesn’t adhere to the same religion - That little bit of food will have to convert or die. During that time, you’ll train differently, focusing on more volume and less weight, just like Celtic or Germanic warriors on campaign in the summer. Rather than manning an oar or going on extended marches, and then fighting pitched battles, the submaximal and repetitive movements you will be doing will give you a physical and mental break from brutally heavy weights and increase your work capacity while improving your shape, correcting the types of muscular imbalances common in modern “I don’t DO machines, bro”, and depleting every last drop of muscle glycogen and draining your fat stores as much as possible. Yeah, stepping on the scale is a motherfucker, but seeing all of your abs without flexing for the first time in a while makes it worth it… Especially knowing you are about to blow the fuck up.</span><br />
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<span id="docs-internal-guid-26422e2f-7fff-3ea7-659b-d6bb1f1a9d87"><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><img height="225" src="https://lh4.googleusercontent.com/sm3PUGlS6ssgbZeqgrSZLd5pt8nmuL_2CQT4lPLbcPTDyL9_1TWWpOpjk_T8Zrfiza08TBEq6VyKPcwGGeN4VkCUWOTIPYymo7c_2TEuFAYHIykRAMOLRfyfVGh8Z0br_23Wcqck" style="border: none; transform: rotate(0rad);" width="400" /></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">“YOU DON’T FUCKING GO AROUND WEEPING ABOUT IT AND YOU DON’T BEHAVE LIKE A KID WITH A SORE THUMB… YOU GOTTA BEHAVE LIKE A GROWN FUCKING MAN. YOU GOTTA SHUT THE FUCK UP.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">DON'T BE SORRY.</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">DON’T LOOK FUCKING BACK, BECAUSE BELIEVE ME, NO ONE GIVES A FUCK!” </span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">-Al Swearengen, <i>Deadwood</i></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica Neue, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;">Up next, the details of the Feast, Famine, and Ferocity Diet. Don’t act like you’re not at least a little curious as to what this is gonna look like.</span><br />
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com28tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-8947562996185287202018-08-03T10:17:00.002-04:002018-08-03T10:17:29.744-04:00The Dubious Value Of Eccentricity<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: red; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The following is an essay I wrote almost in its entirety a couple of years ago in a fit of frustration with the state of strength sports, and shit's only gotten worse. I happened to come across it looking for some old notes and figured I'd drop it in here just because- it really wasn't written with the intention of publishing it. It's a departure from the norm- no porn, no actual lifting advice, and I'm not sure if it's even "life" advice... and it's sure as shit not life coaching.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitHWhdYxOwC0TF-gLC4xyRlmRqdz95iRYS3pxkV6_MFHLG1Ip3wKCXRxtDxD25xenx2WVX3H4wFgwWC6vHGbi__MVGIs5WRUamteicuyl0Qe632F16Rf-Ni5U-VtZMK1ruEM2MA5ZCfmBd/s1600/macfadden60.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="536" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitHWhdYxOwC0TF-gLC4xyRlmRqdz95iRYS3pxkV6_MFHLG1Ip3wKCXRxtDxD25xenx2WVX3H4wFgwWC6vHGbi__MVGIs5WRUamteicuyl0Qe632F16Rf-Ni5U-VtZMK1ruEM2MA5ZCfmBd/s1600/macfadden60.gif" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Bernarr MacFadden</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The father of modern bodybuilding culture, promoter of <a href="https://physicalculturestudy.com/2015/10/22/1903-and-the-birth-of-american-bodybuilding/" target="_blank">the first bodybuilding contest in modern history</a> (with a cash prize<i> bigger than any contest for the next 75 years</i>), and the guy Jack LaLanne ripped off for just about everything. You likely have never heard of him, because MacFadden was a full-blown weirdo who loved porn and fucking, did insane physical stunts even into old age, and thought (very rightly at the time) medical doctors were fucking monsters.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">America is a nation founded upon a belief in individualism above all, if the propaganda rammed down our throats on a daily basis is to be believed. Certainly, the eccentric has played a massive role in American society- from the flamboyant antics of Little Richard, lady Gage, and Prince in pop music to the oddly accessible masculinity and hyperfitness of Bernarr McFadden to the drug-addled, artistic intellectualism of Ken Kesey and Hunter S. Thompson to the bizarre mad scientist brilliance of Nikola Tesla to the utterly insane engineering genius of Howard Hughes and R. Buckminster Fuller, Americas global dominance for the last century is seemingly built upon rampant, brazen individualism. Breaks with convention put man on the moon, into the air, under the sea, and gave us everything we wantonly take for granted today, from electrical power to the zipper. Americans seem drawn to eccentrics like white trash to Oxycontin, though they secretly judge and condemn their oddball idols even as they explain away their behavior as somehow relatable. At the same time, people who have shamelessly blazed their own path, choosing to do whatever the fuck they wanted, do whatever they would, and believe whatever they liked, now cower behind labels, bleating their fear of judgment like sheep rather than snarling their defiance like an enraged hyena, destroying the psychic underpinnings of their uniqueness in a pathetic, limp-wristed plea for acceptance that is an stomach-turning in its delivery as it is in its message.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirLJau74TtJh-OPlxkqASpO71ErK0SR0Sv5OsekZ5E3mWFCmJjjSff0-ACt4S2iGwM1J0tXGaXHrfFmuu7ODtyz_dk9YMtwRt5gQJcc1F7FMgEiN7sWuQGyXIkLU54zT6gATk0Id3VW5Rd/s1600/hqdefault+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="360" data-original-width="480" height="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirLJau74TtJh-OPlxkqASpO71ErK0SR0Sv5OsekZ5E3mWFCmJjjSff0-ACt4S2iGwM1J0tXGaXHrfFmuu7ODtyz_dk9YMtwRt5gQJcc1F7FMgEiN7sWuQGyXIkLU54zT6gATk0Id3VW5Rd/s400/hqdefault+%25281%2529.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Are you unaware that murder was honored in China, rape in New Zealand, theft in Sparta? That man you watch being drawn and quartered in the market place, what has he done? He ventured to acquit himself in Paris of some Japanese virtue."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Marquis de Sade</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A wise man once said, "Strangeness is the energy of our imagination," though society generally tends to adhere to a policy wherein "the nail that sticks out gets hammered down." Wildly eccentric and prolific geniuses like Tesla and Hughes usually die alone and impoverished in spite of the fact that the modern world could not exist without their work. Modern horror fiction would likely not exist without the influence of Edgar Allen Poe and HP Lovecraft, yet both men died tragically bereft of both friends and material comfort. Unmatched strength luminary Arthur Saxon died penniless in a gutter (much like Poe), badass boxer Joe Louis diedowing virtually everyone, and the lifelong outsider who was the father of modern pop music, Stephen Foster, died alone with 38 cents in his pocket. Yet without these people, our modern world simply would not exist. They should be celebrated as the gods of modernity, yet men like Henry Ford, who turned men into mindless automatons regulated by dickheads with stopwatches and accountants, and the psychotic sneak-thief Thomas Edison, who did far more to destroy normal human sleep habits than any other human in history and stole everything from the rights to hundreds of other people's films to the life's breath out of elephants, are the men behind the curtain credited with tending the machines of progress.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEOc0TdKiVzLDeHDxrZ7PL0FHuYLreS6YvG8icqrKlN5iDQFsyxlIITLHf12zyZq6gsICrFFbo4zMJYdrQ6YjFYlqXI8_Pooda7N25FUSeZufDkE23DU5Tgiowi11aywzT8Fplw5YWicmi/s1600/Hunter-S-Thompson.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="350" data-original-width="600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgEOc0TdKiVzLDeHDxrZ7PL0FHuYLreS6YvG8icqrKlN5iDQFsyxlIITLHf12zyZq6gsICrFFbo4zMJYdrQ6YjFYlqXI8_Pooda7N25FUSeZufDkE23DU5Tgiowi11aywzT8Fplw5YWicmi/s1600/Hunter-S-Thompson.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Why is this? Is it because the fine line between genius and insanity is also a line between self-improvement and self-destruction? Is it because a society in which the majority worships an allegedly faultless god and demands the same of its mortal heroes? Is it because the bland shadows of true innovators, labelled as "tireless hard workers" rather than "inexplicable geniuses" are the tasteless pap fed to babes for ease of digestion rather than the deliciously habanero-laden street tacos that might have one shitting their pants in a couple of hours?</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5vjCQtW8t9Jf1lzPR9EzLyzfzuposWSw_2WY1VixyNjQqn1sRPHRpvfKwjVmsVJBh_TogVb4J5YwIGwyCu1ccLgdN4S2ugWWijwxz8dZqrvjeScfoPHUTBNR3-rwOOsjzy8Ze8h3nz7ox/s1600/Homo-Sapien-Evolution-Illustrations-4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="311" data-original-width="625" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj5vjCQtW8t9Jf1lzPR9EzLyzfzuposWSw_2WY1VixyNjQqn1sRPHRpvfKwjVmsVJBh_TogVb4J5YwIGwyCu1ccLgdN4S2ugWWijwxz8dZqrvjeScfoPHUTBNR3-rwOOsjzy8Ze8h3nz7ox/s1600/Homo-Sapien-Evolution-Illustrations-4.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Of course, we call the changes 'compassion,' 'reasonableness,' and 'progress,' but they are actually 'enfeeblement,' 'stupidity,' and 'degeneration.'"</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; text-align: left;">Mark Mirabello</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Perhaps it's a bit of both. Perhaps it is neither. Perhaps it is the formlessness of the true individualist- following their whims through life, their path is erratic, their movements unpredictable, their motivations too obscure and byzantine. Lacking easily identifiable form, wedded to atavistic notions of self, intrinsically motivated and truly apart from society in every way, the true individualist is both a vaunted goal and something completely inaccessible to people who are members of a society that rewards collective thought and shuns the unusual and the unconventional.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"It is not light that we need, but fire; it is not the gentle shower, but thunder. We need the storm, the whirlwind, and the earthquake."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Frederick Douglass</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">We live in a time where, more than ever, people wish to seem a part of the collective and whose every thought and action are scrutinized and criticized when they deviate from the norm. Where children make their parents pay for coaches to learn Fortnight rather than playing the fucking game and figuring it out for themselves. When individual thought and action is as shocking and reviled as it is for lemmings or citizens under a totalitarian regime. When dogma and partisanship reign supreme and possession of opposing views makes one the enemy rather than an object of intrigue and progenitor of intelligent debate.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP8OQDv1JPphLoKASYudpqhN_4j4l5_of47_cvQ-QFub8mCCvdNDv44mrzMfmWEWGMpjCQZM65zGVdCW-5QiZ4GyPUuhcROxNj30uWUdqLwFnhH87Zz8X9kqf9qVxdpHDcwEHGGLn_94Ia/s1600/tumblr_lrxnz7by2l1r3uzb8o1_400.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="296" data-original-width="301" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgP8OQDv1JPphLoKASYudpqhN_4j4l5_of47_cvQ-QFub8mCCvdNDv44mrzMfmWEWGMpjCQZM65zGVdCW-5QiZ4GyPUuhcROxNj30uWUdqLwFnhH87Zz8X9kqf9qVxdpHDcwEHGGLn_94Ia/s1600/tumblr_lrxnz7by2l1r3uzb8o1_400.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"A conclusion is simply where you stopped thinking."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">- <i>Black Iron Prison</i></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As society fractures into smaller and smaller segments, people hold even more sacrosanct the precepts held forth by their given group. Christian Republicans justify inhumane treatment to impoverished people fleeing collapsing societies with their holy book, in spite of the obvious hypocrisy in doing so. Allegedly pacifist leftists justify pointless violence by pointing at the distasteful social opinions of the right. Natty lifters screech endlessly about their purity and superiority relative to people doing what humans have always done, which is to utilize any means necessary to win. Geared lifters and raw lifters hate each other. Oly lifters and powerlifters band together to hate on Crossfitters. And then there are vegans, who hate and are hated by everyone. And all the while, individual thought is shunned more and more as idiots herd together for security against the looming "threat" of the other.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you take nothing else from this, know that there is no mystery to lifting. There is no need for specialization- there is no need to hire coaches and trainers. There is no need to obsess over it- the mystification of weight lifting is one of the most odious trends in strength sports, and one that should quite frankly be met with violence. The people mystifying strength sports- promulgating meaninglessly complex terminology the obfuscates the simplicity of battling gravity- are not your friends. They are the enemy. An enemy hiding in plain sight, pretending to be sorcerers when most of them fail to accomplish even basic strength feats. They're thieves and charlatans, dickheads and fucktards, and generally terrible fucking people. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxVmgwrA3gxomcRcw3SRgakwd1-RHrhwfaMdBy7u46UZGrf68c7yKpeZcIOCZFBkcnlKRzx2oskRFpJ2LEXC6kJDYjAOkset3s5vD5qIdB2nyF6zK54IU7MUifMeGMhPIPbz-87T1pUfo1/s1600/The_Black_Iron_Prison.doc-25.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="847" data-original-width="600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgxVmgwrA3gxomcRcw3SRgakwd1-RHrhwfaMdBy7u46UZGrf68c7yKpeZcIOCZFBkcnlKRzx2oskRFpJ2LEXC6kJDYjAOkset3s5vD5qIdB2nyF6zK54IU7MUifMeGMhPIPbz-87T1pUfo1/s400/The_Black_Iron_Prison.doc-25.png" width="283" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Doubt everything. Find your own light!"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Buddha</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">In the end, eccentricity holds little appeal. Some might call me an edgelord, thinking my writing style is schtick and a gimmick, and that I'm at least partly satirizing myself. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>This just in: I'm not. </b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The shit I write is me- exhaustive research, expansive vocabulary, hardcore and metal and porn and gore and vulgarity, all rolled into a big ball and then swallowed and vomited onto the internet. Clearly, I'm not advocating anyone to follow in my footsteps, because as any have pointed out, I haven't parleyed my dubious internet fame and strength into much in the way of material wealth- though I am a libertarian with MBAs, I'm a pretty terrible fucking capitalist. I write the shit I write to inspire myself, and I figure I might as well try to inspire and educate others while I'm at it. In the end, however, going the path already trodden rather than forging your own is the far easier path. I'm just not built to walk that way- I just forge off into the wild because walking along a beaten path is too fucking boring to bother doing... </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>and I know I'll likely get eaten by a metaphorical wild animal while doing it. </b></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com83tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-83725013317506979862018-07-30T14:04:00.001-04:002018-07-31T08:39:54.721-04:00Training For The Apocalypse Part 2- The Nuclear Option And Robot Rape<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The apocalypse is gonna be too dope.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2014/03/apocalypse-training-part-1-better-to.html?zx=3d6c183333d96552" target="_blank">first installment of this series</a>, published ages ago in a land far, far away, we examined the manner in which one should train for two apocalyptic scenarios- a slow apocalypse and a zombie apocalypse. The reasoning behind this was fairly simple, in that such an exercise illustrates the manner in which one would go about structuring their own training based on the event for which they are preparing and their current level of preparedness. The application, then, is to learn how to figure out how best to train for a given sport, couched in the kind of awesome insanity that leads wild-eyed psychopaths to dig bunkers in their backyard filled with rations, guns and Bibles, and others to slightly more rationally store combat hatchet and knife-laden bug-out bags in their basements (yeah, I fall into the latter category). What you'll find is that there is a fairly wide gap between people who think that training should necessarily be sport specific and those who think that general strength is sufficient to improve performance. Personally, I have never trained with my specificity for anything, be it football, wrestling, mma, powerlifting, or odd lifting/strongman, and I have not suffered for it in the slightest. Strength is strength- there is no such fucking animal as "functional strength" because all strength is necessarily functional.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Not all heroes wear capes. Functional as fuck.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Determining how to a train for a given activity is pretty fucking simple- you determine what will lend itself best to the activity by examining the activity in detail, then identify training methods or movements that aid in the development of those physical attributes. When doing this, however, you need to examine your own strengths and weaknesses as well, so that you construct the program to reinforce your strength while bringing up your weaknesses. If you have to do it Madden-style and just rate yourself out of 100, by all means go for it and be sure to share with the Internet, because if there is anything more in vogue than Excel spreadsheets these days, it's offering the world reasons why you cannot do something before you attempt it to forestall the shame of failure.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpYiBU8NxF3NSDoideEY8G41vf3R5xsDJSwOlBs1tqFTqvz-TFEwkS2hWN_gd4FjfnxivhOcVoRxtPWz2hRyoPjj6Tp_gQoizm97Fdt91rMZCyZQNa0wHCoiPBcHb1WjyHLmPvNNI-a4eH/s1600/LeSean+McCoy+++Madden+Player+Ratings.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="409" data-original-width="887" height="294" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhpYiBU8NxF3NSDoideEY8G41vf3R5xsDJSwOlBs1tqFTqvz-TFEwkS2hWN_gd4FjfnxivhOcVoRxtPWz2hRyoPjj6Tp_gQoizm97Fdt91rMZCyZQNa0wHCoiPBcHb1WjyHLmPvNNI-a4eH/s640/LeSean+McCoy+++Madden+Player+Ratings.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I'm actually going do one of these for an upcoming article on the best strength athlete of all time, I think.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When determining if and how your training is going to change for a given activity, be it participating an extremely abusive (yet consensual) gangbang, trying out for the USA Rugby Sevens team, or switching from Crossfit to strongman, it helps to consider both the the strengths you must display for that activity, and also your personal strength- and fitness-oriented weaknesses. For the latter, we're looking at movements, planes of movement, strength endurance requirements, and cardio requirements that you can add into a program built around raw, violent strength. That's right- barbarous, all-in, cataclysmic, soul-crushing, face-smashing strength will always be the crux of a strength program, because it's a fucking strength program. Anyone who tells you they don't need to be brutally strong for any sport is 1) not an athlete, 2) certainly never going to be strong, and 3) a fucking retard.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Neck- and arm-centric programming would be appropriate for this.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">With all of that in mind, we will move onto my other two favorite apocalyptic scenarios- the Robopocalypse, for which i have been preparing since I was a kid after reading a bunch of old <i>Magnus: Robot Fighter</i> comics, and a Nuclear Apocalypse, which was an eminent threat as a kid (fun fact- according to Robert Heinlein, all of the old malls have bomb shelters beneath them that were simply designed to collapse in upon the inhabitants to obviate the need for burial... rather than shelter the inhabitants so they could fight in a counterattack against the Russians. Because Murica!)</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgptWy9N4Lacfd9AGP2kGRzwuW4yJ30nWLTc3VMEVTwNPe1tclIm0Ku-gKkLkJcMPOp3osK0vq6WZGh3PMSiTpR4a35Ze3jwCzqsCjqvPej2LTbCykIrXH1Izew7Remh-z8EpWDdEwbMfUe/s1600/584230-most-popular-nuclear-apocalypse-wallpaper-1920x1080-for-htc.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgptWy9N4Lacfd9AGP2kGRzwuW4yJ30nWLTc3VMEVTwNPe1tclIm0Ku-gKkLkJcMPOp3osK0vq6WZGh3PMSiTpR4a35Ze3jwCzqsCjqvPej2LTbCykIrXH1Izew7Remh-z8EpWDdEwbMfUe/s640/584230-most-popular-nuclear-apocalypse-wallpaper-1920x1080-for-htc.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>Nuclear Apocalypse</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The specter of nuclear annihilation and irradiated wastelands filled with pustulent mutants driven mad with hunger and cancer since HG Wells first wrote about atomic weapons in <i>The World Set Free</i>. While the roaming bands of cancer-covered mutants dripping noisome ichor likely will never be the plague they are in the nuclear apocalypse flicks of the 1980s, a post apocalyptic wasteland is still a looming threat as Russia unveils new nukes and we are overrun with idiotic flag-waving chickenhawks in the American government. As such, we've got to examine what we need to do to be prepared when one of the gibbering retards in charge of a nuclear button finally pushes the fucking thing because YOLO, and maybe they can get a post-apocalyptic reality show out of it.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For more on nuclear apocalypse scenarios, see: <a href="https://www.amazon.com/War-After-Armageddon-Ralph-Peters/dp/0765323559/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1522249238&sr=8-1&keywords=war+after+armageddon" target="_blank">The War After Armageddon</a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metro_2033" target="_blank">Metro 2033</a>, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Damnation-Alley-Roger-Zelazny-ebook/dp/B00CSTYRV4/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1522249288&sr=1-1-spons&keywords=damnation+alley&psc=1" target="_blank">Damnation Alley</a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2000_AD_(comics)" target="_blank">2000 AD</a>, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oaPP00uNkNI" target="_blank">Six String Samurai</a>.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">With the nuclear apocalypse looming, here are the things I think we need to focus on to ensure Chaos and Pain dominates the atom-blasted, radioactive wasteland we currently face:</span></span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Imposing Physique.</b> If post apocalyptic films have taught me anything, it's that being physically imposing is a primary survival trait in the apocalypse. Whether it's Mean Machine Angel in <i>Judge Dredd</i>, Rictus Erectus in <i>Fury Road</i>, The Humongous in <i>The Road Warrior</i>, Blaster in <i>Mad Max Beyond Thunderdome</i>, Roddy Piper in <i>Hell Comes to Frogtown</i>, or Fred Williamson in <i>The New Barbarians</i>, being jacked is always to your advantage. As the Luciferian adage goes, "the strong rule the weak and the clever rule the strong," so by extension people those of us who are clever and strong are going to rule the apocalypse with an iron fist. An imposing physique will deter raiders and inspire confidence in anyone you're trying to lead or order around, <u>so it's important you look like a bad motherfucker</u>.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Strength</b>. Like an imposing physique, immense physical strength will cow people who are weak and fearful, and you can easily enslave them to do your bidding. Additionally, that strength will pay dividends in personal security and in the rebuilding process. Being the strongest person in a community will likely make you both one of the most feared and one of the most valuable, which adheres to Machiavelli's suggestion in <i>The Prince</i>, "From this arises the question whether it is better to be loved rather than feared, or feared rather than loved. It might perhaps be answered that we should wish to be both: but since love and fear can hardly exist together, if we must choose between them, it is far safer to be feared than loved."</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Muscular Endurance. </b>Muscular endurance is certainly a useful trait in any apocalypse, but frankly it is more a trait of a conquered laborer than the warlord of a dawning post-nuclear polity. Initially, however, muscular endurance will be useful for scrapping and scavenging, and for fighting, but its development is definitely a secondary consideration to maximal strength.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">The Chernobyl mutants seem pretty tame- insofar as i know this kid has yet to taste human flesh.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><i>The Donald Trump Contingency Program</i></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Because the man in charge of the largest nuclear arsenal in the world is a halfwit who's confused threats of nuclear war with fake punching your kid brother in the backseat of the car, the threat of nuclear war is more real than it's been since the USSR was run by similarly pompous, old, impotent, retarded men. As such, it might soon become necessary to fight off mutants, plague carriers, whatever government agency Trump sends to put us in internment camps for our own safekeeping, and the omnipresent threat of assault by countless illegal immigrants flooding across our borders (settle down there, southerners- your nonexistent plight of "invasion" by starving Central Americans must be just terrifying). With these threats looming, it'd behoove us all to train at least six times a week if you can drag yourself away from Facebook to stop crying about who said what mean thing to whom first and just get ready to unfuck your situation when our government decides it's high time to just finish off the destruction they've already begun.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPViy4tIkzR21ZvZLHC3lNXSeNWgClLQK4BFWVQhPa_jI5Zq3xYibWOOVKAYQ8caRqiQccShD6TGMpiGPEjiPhLFi-pcIFmhcJuc9YBRDMh1ViVHa44NddAYN0-QtLJsm5g56nhpotvOtN/s1600/04INTHVLRNORTHKOREA-TRUMPOTRUMP.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="381" data-original-width="660" height="184" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgPViy4tIkzR21ZvZLHC3lNXSeNWgClLQK4BFWVQhPa_jI5Zq3xYibWOOVKAYQ8caRqiQccShD6TGMpiGPEjiPhLFi-pcIFmhcJuc9YBRDMh1ViVHa44NddAYN0-QtLJsm5g56nhpotvOtN/s320/04INTHVLRNORTHKOREA-TRUMPOTRUMP.jpeg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Congrats to Trump for at least picking the nation with the smallest dicks (<a href="https://heavy.com/news/2012/09/new-penis-study-shows-north-koreans-have-smallest-skin-flutes/" target="_blank">3.8 sad little inches</a>) to assert himself over, because a dick measuring contest is generally not one he'll win. Know how I know? If he was hung like a donkey it would have been the basis of his entire platform.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Too political? Eat shit. Onto the program.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>Day 1</u></span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Pushdowns</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Pushdowns</b>- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Partial Front Squats</b> (off the pins)- 10x2 with a ten second hold at the top of each rep [2-3 min rest between sets]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Unilateral Calf Raise</b>- 10x10 (for quick bursts of speed, the ability to get up an incline quickly, jumping, etc) [1 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Klokov Press</b>- 8x5 [2 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 2</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Stone Loading</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- AMRAP ~185lb stone in 30 minutes (high rep)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pendlay Row</b> (very explosively)- 10x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2-3 min rest between sets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Strength/Machine Row</b>- 6x4 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Row</b>- 5x6-20 using a variety of handles </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist Roller/Forearm Work</b>- 10 sets </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 3</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Pushdowns</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Pushdowns</b>- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 10x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Strength/Machine Chest Press</b>-5x10 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[90 sec rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Military Press</b>- Work up to a max single, then 10x2 90%1RM </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2DlHjRoay43Ipa8odMJfb0OcG5-3t6KjnaMGqvNtLLqgz-1i5-0GMf9OOAHRs1XtdpuEaBpFMEe-HM-ZMgi7Opoo_glKlbsPskTpHnpqJJ3zrXU-BA_LGKjWrifzohDtmDfnBJIjgHMlb/s1600/tumblr_pbb7xexpmn1x87voqo1_250.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="173" data-original-width="250" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2DlHjRoay43Ipa8odMJfb0OcG5-3t6KjnaMGqvNtLLqgz-1i5-0GMf9OOAHRs1XtdpuEaBpFMEe-HM-ZMgi7Opoo_glKlbsPskTpHnpqJJ3zrXU-BA_LGKjWrifzohDtmDfnBJIjgHMlb/s1600/tumblr_pbb7xexpmn1x87voqo1_250.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Don't forget you're gonna need to megadose the protein, so check out this article for weight gainer shakes.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 4</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Stone Loading</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- AMRAP ~185lb stone in 30 minutes (high rep)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff Leg High Pull</b>- 12x2 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Strength/Machine Row</b>- 6x4 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Weighted Pullups</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 6x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist Roller/Forearm Work</b>- 10 sets </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 5</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rest</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Skullcrushers</b>- 6x4-10 (working up to a very heavy set of four, bouncing the bar off the bench above your head rather than touching to your forehead) </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Pushdowns</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Pushdowns</b>- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Curls</b>-</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">6x4-10 (working up to a very heavy set of four) </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Reverse Grip Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 supersetted with</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Curls</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x10-20 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest between supersets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Day 6</span></b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Rest</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Partial Back Squats/Partial Front Squats/Yoke/Conan's Wheel</b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Log Continental and Press/Axle </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Continental and Press</span></span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Close Grip Bench Press/</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Close Grip Axle Press/Axle Floor Press</span></span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
<u><b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Day 7</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Off</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><u><b>For progression</b></u>: when you are able to get all of the reps with a given work weight, add 5-10lbs and use that weight until you can complete every rep. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWHl23y02gisXAUwQpq0QbzFmQ4eC9e5etMJWHEc-GaG3wOprwStfuI1YOWOCB8Ydwh8T43k5odi49RrrqoWDD5LsE8oc9ZLBd0ScCBP9IiA4q9gSyQFnxfXDGTjEr-8-Jv5f0tjqWGZbk/s1600/titanfall-militia-battle-robot-explosion-ruin.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="1600" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWHl23y02gisXAUwQpq0QbzFmQ4eC9e5etMJWHEc-GaG3wOprwStfuI1YOWOCB8Ydwh8T43k5odi49RrrqoWDD5LsE8oc9ZLBd0ScCBP9IiA4q9gSyQFnxfXDGTjEr-8-Jv5f0tjqWGZbk/s640/titanfall-militia-battle-robot-explosion-ruin.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b>Robopocalypse</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It's entirely possible you don't think that autonomous robots will never attempt to murder us. The reason you think that is because you're an idiot. Nevertheless, I have actually thought this issue through, at great length, because pontificating upon fantastical end-of-days scenarios is one of my favorite things to do. And a robopocalypse is not difficult to imagine when Google and Amazon are developing advanced AIs, the ATLAS robot developed by Boston Dynamics <a href="https://www.wired.com/2009/07/military-researchers-develop-corpse-eating-robots/" target="_blank">can fucking trail run</a>, and DARPA has developed a robot hilariously named EATR that <a href="https://www.wired.com/2009/07/military-researchers-develop-corpse-eating-robots/" target="_blank">can refuel itself on plant and animal matter</a>. Put those three things together and we're mere days away from getting hunted to the ends of the earth by sentient, robotic corpse-gobbling traceurs.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1kX2_B4VS5lfGeJhcNK9X17CxuMufopoDvdKaq-gIAyiyVg_mdlOnPXDLDS0ex13fFwEnIfZUcv3OLEnSKRJv6jlJxgjxUjK9BDtR3zrN15nOvFNhbmeYJovdWQUBE9Ml6S2MIxneAsUX/s1600/small_1293-biggest-tits-you-ll-ever-see-on-a-skinny-little-babe-.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="117" data-original-width="210" height="222" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1kX2_B4VS5lfGeJhcNK9X17CxuMufopoDvdKaq-gIAyiyVg_mdlOnPXDLDS0ex13fFwEnIfZUcv3OLEnSKRJv6jlJxgjxUjK9BDtR3zrN15nOvFNhbmeYJovdWQUBE9Ml6S2MIxneAsUX/s400/small_1293-biggest-tits-you-ll-ever-see-on-a-skinny-little-babe-.gif" width="400" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">This broad has enough bolt-on parts she might just be a robot, and I had a request for bimbos with bolt-on tits. I am a man of the people, after all. Hit me up on FB if you wanna request a porn genre.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For more on this, see: <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Magnus-Robot-Fighter-Archives-v/dp/1593072694" target="_blank"><i>Magnus: Robot Fighter</i></a>, <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Robopocalypse-Contemporaries-Daniel-H-Wilson/dp/0307740803" target="_blank"><i>Robopocalypse</i></a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gog_(film)" target="_blank"><i>Gog</i></a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Terminator_(franchise)" target="_blank">the <i>Terminator</i> franchise</a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chopping_Mall" target="_blank"><i>Chopping Mall</i></a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hardware_(film)" target="_blank"><i>Hardware</i></a>, <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Class_of_1999" target="_blank"><i>Class of 1999</i></a>, and for fist-fighting robots, Richard Matheson's short story <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Steel_(The_Twilight_Zone)" target="_blank"><i>Steel</i></a> (which was the source for a badass Twilight Zone episode and was then turned into a shit heap children's movie starring Hugh Jackman).</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikseLOpIpfcpnmoQDDJ-jvWeraMXB4kWXj0VSlP_4_PY6VEtRuTUY0hN_2jGj0Xt-GQdSjLGsBV0z8TTjL9LSrJrokKcRO3S9-wL2XJPJKGl6N-wphLZlQMxbBSrrOGJaVWRFRp_fMIozu/s1600/Magnus01Cov0118125OnlyFowlerVirg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="900" data-original-width="600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikseLOpIpfcpnmoQDDJ-jvWeraMXB4kWXj0VSlP_4_PY6VEtRuTUY0hN_2jGj0Xt-GQdSjLGsBV0z8TTjL9LSrJrokKcRO3S9-wL2XJPJKGl6N-wphLZlQMxbBSrrOGJaVWRFRp_fMIozu/s1600/Magnus01Cov0118125OnlyFowlerVirg.jpg" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As the specter of the robopocalypse looms, it stands to reason we might want to be prepared. Having read tons of <i>Magnus: Robot Fighter</i> back issues I found at a flea market as a kid, I feel as though I am now an authority on battling our future robot overlords. Here's what i think our focus needs to be:</span></span><br />
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Shaolin Iron Body Training / Muay Thai Body Conditioning / Filipino Body Conditioning / Systema</b>- Call me a lunatic (you'd be correct), but the very first thing I think anyone should do with the overthrow of humanity by machines on the horizon is prepare their body to receive a beating. Shaolin monks have a method they've developed that allows them to take beatings generally reserved for cervices and retarded women in Louisiana <a href="https://youtu.be/aGZ8qgooYrQ?t=16s" target="_blank">without any damage at all</a>. That would allow us to attack robots with nothing but a solid set of tactical gloves on if need be and possibly survive. Similarly, Thai and Filipino body conditioning enable fighters in those disciplines to strike hard targets with little pain, which is going to be essential for your battles with Google death bots and the like.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Iron Fist Training</b>- Even with tactical gloves on, punching a fucking robot is gonna suck. Better that we harden the shit out of our hands with Iron Fist training or something similar to strengthen and fuse the bones in our hands than get one solid robot kill and then die because we're trying to fight with shattered hands.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Punching Power/Kicking Power</b>- Frankly, I fucking hate losing fights, so if I am going to be fighting metal monsters, I intend to hit hard enough to hurt them. This means insanely intense, explosive super strength. Fuck doing reps- explosive strength between one and three reps is the kind of strength that will develop truly cataclysmic striking force.</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGvCcOUY-yquWmL4jECYxz5c7VmpI3zv62xqQAdYPXGBkFP2fFJeWwNlukAxHvo58liEjd7Ce2at0DtINRoDDmiQJujqQhC-7A7QKcD0EIqADQKnuqPoT2BbYO9_YCSgEJXYZk0Hjo_nFX/s1600/Magnus-Robot-Fighter-1-Page-01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1041" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGvCcOUY-yquWmL4jECYxz5c7VmpI3zv62xqQAdYPXGBkFP2fFJeWwNlukAxHvo58liEjd7Ce2at0DtINRoDDmiQJujqQhC-7A7QKcD0EIqADQKnuqPoT2BbYO9_YCSgEJXYZk0Hjo_nFX/s640/Magnus-Robot-Fighter-1-Page-01.jpg" width="416" /></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
<div>
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><i>The Magnus: Robot Fighter Training Routine</i></span></b></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Yeah, yeah, I know- if we are reduced to having to fistfight Amazon's drone warriors we are likely all fucked harder than the Celts in the <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siege_of_Numantia" target="_blank">siege of Numantia</a>, and like those Celts we're all going to die badly. Given that I would rather go down swinging rather than bitching about the automatonic armageddon on Twitter and the the fact that this is just a fun intellectual exercise, I'm structuring my training this way. I'm sure at least half of you would rather spend your time learning code so you can hack the robots and force them to do you bidding, but you're gonna need someone to keep their metallic appendages off your scrawny ass while you're attempting to decipher what will likely prove to be an unhackable AI legacy code we didn't even know existed, and since I'd rather be burned alive than go back to coding, I'll stick with training to brawl robots.</span></div>
<div>
</div>
<div>
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>Day 1</u></span></b></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdZmvN0MjMc" target="_blank"><b>Si Bi Quan training</b></a> (this is the training that wore down the concrete floor in the Shaolin Temple. The force of the stomp actually strengthens both the bones and internal organs, which prevents damage and injury when struck).</span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.wikihow.com/Train-Iron-Fist-Kung-Fu" target="_blank"><b>Iron Fist training</b></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Viking Press</b>- 6x3, 5x2, 5x1 [2-3 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Klokov Press</b>- 4x2 [2 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Speed Bench</b>- 10x3 (75% 1RM- 3 sets close grip, 3 medium grip, 3 wide) [30 second rests]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Skullcrusher</b>- 8x3 (</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">bouncing the bar off the bench above your head rather than touching to your forehead) </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 2</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvPyIGGuOu4" target="_blank">Iron Shirt training</a> </b></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a27rN8Dy3nw" target="_blank">Systema training</a> </b></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Partial Front Squats</b> (off the pins)- 10x2 with a ten second hold at the top of each rep [2-3 min rest between sets]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Unilateral Calf Raise</b>- 10x10 (for quick bursts of speed, the ability to get up an incline quickly, jumping, etc) [1 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pendlay Row</b> (very explosively)- 10x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2-3 min rest between sets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Strength/Machine Row</b>- 4x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Curl</b>- 10x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist Roller/Forearm Work</b>- 10 sets </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 3</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdZmvN0MjMc" target="_blank"><b>Si Bi Quan training</b></a></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.wikihow.com/Train-Iron-Fist-Kung-Fu" target="_blank"><b>Iron Fist training</b></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 10x3 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Viking Press</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 10x1 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hammer Strength/Machine Chest Press</b>-5x5 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[90 sec rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Circus Dumbbell Press/ One Arm DB Press</b>- 6x2 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0TGPXqmDL6IMUGHA40ZwOIAvdEJ3dD2ZrK7UyvmQuRNi3wjcbEIbEppVrXmWbEe50JvodtTgIAULyNOqBmz8cwg8bQjyDFw3OGOy9FcIBSfuii9irsIBz8zrFtoxkhAc7iO5r4nsg63O6/s1600/18593146.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="291" data-original-width="518" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0TGPXqmDL6IMUGHA40ZwOIAvdEJ3dD2ZrK7UyvmQuRNi3wjcbEIbEppVrXmWbEe50JvodtTgIAULyNOqBmz8cwg8bQjyDFw3OGOy9FcIBSfuii9irsIBz8zrFtoxkhAc7iO5r4nsg63O6/s1600/18593146.gif" /></span></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">If you're concerned about robot rape, I suggest a bit of this as a second evening workout.</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 4</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvPyIGGuOu4" target="_blank">Iron Shirt training</a> </b></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a27rN8Dy3nw" target="_blank">Systema training</a> </b></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff Leg High Pull</b>- 12x2 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Zercher Squats</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> (off the pins)- 6x2 with a ten second hold at the top of each rep [2-3 min rest between sets]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Unilateral Calf Raise</b>- 5x5 [1 min rest]</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist Roller/Forearm Work</b>- 10 sets </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Day 5</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PdZmvN0MjMc" target="_blank"><b>Si Bi Quan training</b></a></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.wikihow.com/Train-Iron-Fist-Kung-Fu" target="_blank"><b>Iron Fist training</b></a></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Close Grip Bench Press- </span></b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12x2 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Military Press</b>- 5x3, 3x2, 3x1 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b>Skullcrushers</b>- 5 sets of 21s</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Ab Wheel</b>- 5xAMRAP </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Day 6</span></b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><u>AM</u></span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvPyIGGuOu4" target="_blank">Iron Shirt training</a> </b></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a27rN8Dy3nw" target="_blank">Systema training</a> </b></span></div>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u>PM</u></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Rack Pulls </b>(knee height)- </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12x2 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Shrugs</b> (off high pins)- 6x3 (you should barely be moving the fucking bar on the third one, or using a crazy amount of body English) </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[3 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Grip Curls</b> (straight bar)- 5x5 </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[2 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Wrist Roller/Forearm Work</b>- 10 sets </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[1 min rest]</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Day 7</span></b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Off</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: sans-serif;"><u><b>For progression</b></u>: when you are able to get all of the reps with a given work weight, add 5-10lbs and use that weight until you can complete every rep.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And there you have it- two training systems unique to the situation for which you're preparing, based upon the unique needs each situation has. In spite of their uniqueness, however, there is no need for "sport specific" bullshit, because the movements associated with that shit are just window dressing trainers use to entice people to adopt their training program. Even for strength sports (other than Olympic lifting, which is a skill sport), as I showed when I broke the all-time WR in powerlifting, there is not much need for specificity- simply being massively strong is enough. Directing your training to maximize the strength you'll need across planes of movement is generally enough to dominate your opposition, be they radioactive mutant scorpions, incestuous, cannibalistic mountain men, killer robots, zombies, or just some pussy who's on his fifth iteration of Sheiko Jr.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
</span><br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Fuck those who oppose. Annihilation of the opposition is what we do.</b></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwV7M4TC4AVeMtQAYYfmY6bsR0T0QkWkd7-DKs1rnsxc_hyphenhyphenyaJl0ATQxTnVzO3v80K15e0nk-oTXB2MrJ2xVYVVi6ZmuPZRglC98Y_S3nUnlxj61IfmZxfiRvrTeJHkfx-vod_gNfXNfpQ/s1600/AC4507D.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="430" data-original-width="722" height="380" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwV7M4TC4AVeMtQAYYfmY6bsR0T0QkWkd7-DKs1rnsxc_hyphenhyphenyaJl0ATQxTnVzO3v80K15e0nk-oTXB2MrJ2xVYVVi6ZmuPZRglC98Y_S3nUnlxj61IfmZxfiRvrTeJHkfx-vod_gNfXNfpQ/s640/AC4507D.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">...and gore and porn. We do a lot of that, too.</span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com23tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-54845736238696533622018-07-26T23:29:00.000-04:002018-07-26T23:45:03.483-04:00John McWilliams, The Reason You Should Pay Attention To The Arm And Bench Bros In Your Gym<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If there is any person in your gym more unjustly maligned than the dude with the biggest arms in the gym, I am a Chinese jet pilot. For the last decade and a half, the arm specialists have labored in darkened corners, stretching their sleeves daily while 150lb "serious" lifters talk shit behind their backs like they are members of a Long Island elderly Jewish sewing circle. Compounding this fact is the fact that the arm specialists are generally also bench bros, so the "serious" lifters talk even more shit, acting more jealous and salty than a pregnant women watching a doughnut and pickle-eating competition. The coup-de-grace is the fact that when they're done benching everyone's best squat, those guys also tend to roll out of the gym with the hottest girl anyone's ever seen, because that's how life works- no one gives a flying fuck what your squat is until they're safely entrenched behind a computer screen so they can talk shit without getting hit.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrNpLS4Q-q_kKJF2RIlLJdHbKNvbYWkI6_ldscauMpEfkF_IH924jwC1M24pE_6ci1qK5JJTL9dIGrqkE6HL3Es08EOrGc5ao4ApwDKwsodMZPlBwKTvvA51zMYTz6ttIhx_Uz9pjcQlAv/s1600/nine.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="209" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrNpLS4Q-q_kKJF2RIlLJdHbKNvbYWkI6_ldscauMpEfkF_IH924jwC1M24pE_6ci1qK5JJTL9dIGrqkE6HL3Es08EOrGc5ao4ApwDKwsodMZPlBwKTvvA51zMYTz6ttIhx_Uz9pjcQlAv/s1600/nine.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Had he not skipped leg day, he'd definitely have been a bodybuilder people talk about in hushed tones today. As it stands, he only managed to pull off 13th and 18th in the 1946 and 1947 AAU Mr. America contest, but fuck it and YOLO- the man was an upper body specialist.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the 1950s, no one gave a fuck what you squatted- people barely did the goddamned lift. I've no idea if this explains the ridiculous prevalence of 500lb natty benchers in that decade, but whatever the reason, every day was chest and arms day, and every day was good. Contrary to the autistic screechings of a man who has never cited a source or read Carl Jung, Lyle McDonald, the guys in the 1950 didn't need to consult a genetic potential chart to determine their natty limit, because they just assaulted the weights like orally fixated college chicks attack cock at a frat party and got shit done. It was either John McWilliams (or Bud Counts) who rocked the first 20" arms cold, which would likely indicate that he was busting his sleeves at over 21" with a pump on, and although that man would be a pariah in modern gyms, he was also one of the first people to bench over 500lbs <i>and</i> rocked a sick deadlift. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>"I shall not commit the fashionable stupidity of regarding everything I cannot explain as fraud [or steroids]."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- Carl Jung </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yz6Dd6E-N7drhysHxblYk8hdioW_of4gjfi6kqEje1GPLMsirnyAkhlqk6TIqsg1iQzct7-P5fhldOlFT5MbXKuo3m23TMtbKJhTSb-zpZ8qvEVC1SyBTgXMWy-hPf2eE-9Wwfgx9qyo/s1600/Unknown-3.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="186" data-original-width="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yz6Dd6E-N7drhysHxblYk8hdioW_of4gjfi6kqEje1GPLMsirnyAkhlqk6TIqsg1iQzct7-P5fhldOlFT5MbXKuo3m23TMtbKJhTSb-zpZ8qvEVC1SyBTgXMWy-hPf2eE-9Wwfgx9qyo/s1600/Unknown-3.jpeg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Clearly, McWilliams didn't skip shoulders or back day, either.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Not only was McWilliams more impressive in the gym and on the platform than a chick who can take three fists in her ass, but he was one of the most prolific trainers of his era. At this point, NFL teams trained wherever they could, and McWilliams ended up coaching most of the San Diego Chargers including All-Pros Jack Kemp, Keith Lincoln and Ron Mix, who led their team to the AFL championship game twice. McWilliams was just as legendary for his sick arms as he was for being an amazing trainer, and the arm program he devised was used by himself, bodybuilding luminary Gene Mozee, and dozens of trainees to put an average of 1.25" on their arms in six weeks.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDvlOR7cV6A1QEFLI-XGSdicFna5-CHwNymYwYYbM2If-5DgE7l_j6oBG7KD6to7usFgF66zWxPYy9MXr53frA3ELgf4xEjigwBJZAy9YfPAPhvxHvqouC8KI8n1v0HY1ovrI_XMrAVMFd/s1600/s-l1600.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1039" data-original-width="1536" height="432" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiDvlOR7cV6A1QEFLI-XGSdicFna5-CHwNymYwYYbM2If-5DgE7l_j6oBG7KD6to7usFgF66zWxPYy9MXr53frA3ELgf4xEjigwBJZAy9YfPAPhvxHvqouC8KI8n1v0HY1ovrI_XMrAVMFd/s640/s-l1600.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Long after he quit competing, McWilliams was rocking 20" arms or bigger.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I am as skeptical as you- I've never put an inch on my arms in a full year, never mind six weeks. McWilliams was a different breed- even over 40, having cut to 186 lbs, he still rocked 19.25" arms, cold. Frankly, to me that is preposterous. I'm five inches shorter than the man and at the same weight had 17" arms, so I'm unclear how that could possibly work, but the man who taped his arms was none other than the legendary trainer Leo Stern, so it goes without saying that the measurement was legit.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvfN_rUSd71T2sW7lLV-MeXPccr_dn7aOusAEgzBYfl0H-6WYamXjhrRQIAya9BzXEotS8Blgm42yjM-BKLPCpXiNuaPBucTKyb0t0u_moY1vZXuaKiybvYu3eQwyIT0__hH5e7lNJ3Tf5/s1600/1350862788-Bodybuilder-Powerlifter-John-McWilliams-le-premier-recordman-du-Bench-presse+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="793" data-original-width="600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvfN_rUSd71T2sW7lLV-MeXPccr_dn7aOusAEgzBYfl0H-6WYamXjhrRQIAya9BzXEotS8Blgm42yjM-BKLPCpXiNuaPBucTKyb0t0u_moY1vZXuaKiybvYu3eQwyIT0__hH5e7lNJ3Tf5/s1600/1350862788-Bodybuilder-Powerlifter-John-McWilliams-le-premier-recordman-du-Bench-presse+%25281%2529.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tragically, all that survives of the man's training routine is his arm routine, though I think we'd all like a look at his bench and deadlift routines as well- pulling in the 700's while looking like a goddamned polio victim is a hell of a feat, especially in a time when deadlifting was not tremendously common and a 710 deadlift by a 220lb man was pretty unheard of. Given the emphasis guys like Chuck Sipes put on triceps development to push your bench up, having the man's arm routine is better than nothing, especially given the fact that trainees who used it in Gene Mozee's gym averaged over an inch on their arms in under two months with this thing.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh70NQfSLh04tFiGvl00bjvS2krgZfv5BXDP_xOWdpNhLabWjf7XJ3BMeBFxnZ0pgopmuUl1I8ZKve3TP5kTlg7boILXSemqNJQM3scj3L756afwgml7o3jMMDHbNBwH20k4CJWyLDuDrbq/s1600/1350862943-Bodybuilder-John-McWilliams-le-premier-recordman-du-Bench-press+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="777" data-original-width="600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh70NQfSLh04tFiGvl00bjvS2krgZfv5BXDP_xOWdpNhLabWjf7XJ3BMeBFxnZ0pgopmuUl1I8ZKve3TP5kTlg7boILXSemqNJQM3scj3L756afwgml7o3jMMDHbNBwH20k4CJWyLDuDrbq/s1600/1350862943-Bodybuilder-John-McWilliams-le-premier-recordman-du-Bench-press+%25281%2529.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If you're still skeptical, bear in mind the fact that McWilliams had a standing offer of a thousand bucks to anyone who could measure his arms at less than 19.5", which might be the greatest endorsement of a training methodology ever. The following is the McWilliams arm routine, and one we should all probably jump on for six weeks to test out. It's unlike virtually anything you'll see advertised these days, which should tell you that if nothing else you should at least end up looking like you lift, something all too uncommon in the last few years.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkelixlM7qXhque0ZAnv5Y317M9vEZQJcCFiOtTJSlOKBmracK1j4jQdOh5L5HPuxcj2u85gFDTfGsS6QWgfD2Xck5GClmu37riz_FYrHgm8Fz9NOJGdlMQFZ0p3IfZucxJzmQVBV3iCvS/s1600/mcwilliams+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1313" data-original-width="1145" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhkelixlM7qXhque0ZAnv5Y317M9vEZQJcCFiOtTJSlOKBmracK1j4jQdOh5L5HPuxcj2u85gFDTfGsS6QWgfD2Xck5GClmu37riz_FYrHgm8Fz9NOJGdlMQFZ0p3IfZucxJzmQVBV3iCvS/s640/mcwilliams+1.jpg" width="558" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I can only imagine how terrified this man's suburban neighbors were of him.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b style="font-size: x-large; text-decoration-line: underline;">John McWilliams Arm Program </b>(Mozee)</u></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">* This program is done, true to bench and arm bro sensibilities, three times a week. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b><u>Superset</u></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Pullovers</b>- 2 x 12</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Close-Grip Bench Presses</b>- 2 x 12</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Superset</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Pullovers</b>- 2 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Close-Grip Bench Presses</b>- 2 x 6</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Superset</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curls</b>- 3 x 12</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Overhead Tricep Extensions</b>- 3 x 12</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Superset</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Curls</b>- 3 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Triceps Presses</b>- 3 x 10</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lying Barbell Triceps Extensions</b>- 3 x 12</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Close-Grip Bench Presses</b>- 3 x 10*</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One-Arm Kickbacks</b>- 2 x 20**</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">*The second you're done the third set of bench, grab a db and start kickbacks. Kickbacks get no rest between arms, but a 30 second rest between sets.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA8MStpwdMtdyO5gEbTc14_-Z7wi26OhZBa3XZp053GSkTo6f_zWpwiBRf074pLljnl4-Bv0UTOG6Gm4YSkG62-STQQtZ5mUE2ov_ds4nQCqdUpTW7WbCjZm-MxvB3WnwSssicyBETKNjJ/s1600/main-qimg-7f30ce21e6674fd9e62a618cc0bd9068.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="370" data-original-width="203" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhA8MStpwdMtdyO5gEbTc14_-Z7wi26OhZBa3XZp053GSkTo6f_zWpwiBRf074pLljnl4-Bv0UTOG6Gm4YSkG62-STQQtZ5mUE2ov_ds4nQCqdUpTW7WbCjZm-MxvB3WnwSssicyBETKNjJ/s640/main-qimg-7f30ce21e6674fd9e62a618cc0bd9068.png" width="350" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If you're stunned at the fact that a guy with a 500lb bench seems to have trained his arms strictly for the pump with a bundle of supersets that look to be crazier than a sack of rabid weasels, so am I, but before you run off half cocked, it's important you read the exercise descriptions. Old heads like myself will remember doing skullscrushers and presses or pullover and press, but the new jacks definitely will not have any experience with this kind of thing. <b>Therefore, read the following descriptions, <u>and you'll note that literally every other John McWilliams program reprint (including the one on Deszo Ban) is completely fucking incorrect.</u></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1) <b>Pullovers and presses. </b>This is not only a good exercise for the chest and shoulders, but it’s terrific for the arms. I attribute 75% of my own arm development to this double-compound exercise. There are many variations of this that you can perform. In this routine it’s used as a warmup and the first exercise, as follows.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Lie on your back on a flat bench that’s at least 18 inches high. Grasp the barbell with your hands approximately 10 inches apart. Begin with the bar resting on your chest and then press the weight up about 12 inches. With your arms bent, continue by guiding the bar back, over your head and down as far as you can. When you reach the lowest point, pull hard and bring the weight back to the original position on your chest. Repeat for 12 reps, inhaling as you lower the weight and exhaling as you pull back to the starting position. Do this part of the movement slowly so you can feel the muscle pulling both ways.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When you finish the 12 pullovers, without taking any rest, do 12 narrow-grip bench presses, exhaling as you press the weight to arm’s length and inhaling as you lower it back to your chest. Still taking no rest, perform sis more pullovers and six more bench presses. This last round of the double-compound exercise really brings the blood to the target region, which gives you a massive pump that sticks around for the rest of the arm routine. Do two sets of this super movement, resting about 90 seconds between sets.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2) <b>Two-arm curls and triceps presses.</b> This double movement is one of the best exercises for the biceps. While standing erect, with your feet about 18 inches apart, hold a barbell with a medium, palms-up grip and slowly curl the weight from your thighs to your shoulders, tensing the biceps at the top. Lower the weight slowly to your thighs and repeat for 12 reps. Remember to stand stiff and let your biceps do all the work.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When you finish the curls, go right into the triceps presses. Switch to an overgrip and press the barbell overhead, which positions your palms facing forward. Holding your elbows stationary throughout the movement, bend your arms, letting the weight travel down to the backs of your shoulders, and then push the weight back to arm’s length with triceps power alone. Inhale as you let the weight down, and exhale as you press it up. Perform 12 reps and then without taking any rest, grab two fairly light dumbbells and do 10 fast curls using good form, which means going all the way down without swinging the dumbbells. When you finish that, again without taking any rest, do 10 fast triceps presses with the dumbbells.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rest for 60 to 90 seconds and repeat this double-compound exercise for a total of three sets.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3) <b>Lying barbell triceps extensions.</b> This is one of my favorite exercises for building triceps size. Lie on your back on a flat bench and start with the bar at arm’s length above your chest and keep your hands 10 inches apart. Keeping your elbows pointed toward the ceiling, lower the weight slowly behind your head. Inhale as you lower the barbell and exhale as you press back to the starting position. Repeat for three sets of 12 reps, resting for 45 to 60 seconds between sets.</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4) <b>Close-grip benches and triceps pumper.</b> This is another superior size builder. Lie on a flat bench, and use a weight that you can sustain for three sets of at least 10 reps. Inhale on the way down and exhale on the way up, and rest about 60 seconds between sets.</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When you finish the third set, taking no rest, pick up a dumbbell with your right hand and bend forward at the waist, with your left hand holding onto a support. Do 20 kickbacks, then switch the weight to the other hand for 20 reps. Rest for 30 seconds and perform a second set for each arm (Mozee).</span></span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgui6EH6FJdMrfgZwCyZMzq9VavdAm27Li3Ns7gRzYE8dxkxl55RwhYteG2wAegvpRjB_3MTPbWp_p3_A1vKOxuJp1aWm33eicyilaH5iiw6XCTyxfblpRy0tZhzkg0cU1_UJEXGFJBE5Go/s1600/gene+mozee++rip.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1480" data-original-width="852" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgui6EH6FJdMrfgZwCyZMzq9VavdAm27Li3Ns7gRzYE8dxkxl55RwhYteG2wAegvpRjB_3MTPbWp_p3_A1vKOxuJp1aWm33eicyilaH5iiw6XCTyxfblpRy0tZhzkg0cU1_UJEXGFJBE5Go/s640/gene+mozee++rip.jpg" width="368" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Bodybuilder, magazine editor, photographer, and trainer Gene Mozee, who also rocked 20" arms and a 2 second paused bench press at 220 in the 1950s.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And if that isn't enough arm action for you, the guys at Mozee's Pasadena Gym who packed the most meat on their arms in six weeks also added concentration curls to the beginning of that bitch, because fuck overtraining. Start with a set of ten, then a set of eight with a heavier db, then and even heavier six, and then drop the weight and bust out a set of 15. The example Gene gave was "40 pounds for 10 reps, 45 pounds for eight reps, 50 pounds for six reps and 30 pounds for 15 reps" (Mozee). After that, you start the above program.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgicqbg6gOmlSpctqbxJr1359WLQWPPx97mtZ3b-gOqCK9Q5IbdFQfNVdP-IBbEA8eKv0Jieo49xhgApvpOYyb0yI1N_XXLTiRBXwaUkODs_Cgz8K6dEQktUfDFIgg8fJ6oOw4piCttYjcI/s1600/ErjNQqK.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="449" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgicqbg6gOmlSpctqbxJr1359WLQWPPx97mtZ3b-gOqCK9Q5IbdFQfNVdP-IBbEA8eKv0Jieo49xhgApvpOYyb0yI1N_XXLTiRBXwaUkODs_Cgz8K6dEQktUfDFIgg8fJ6oOw4piCttYjcI/s1600/ErjNQqK.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Beyond the arms program, McWilliam's training gets speculative on a "let's fuck the economy in the ear by using derivatives to sell shitty loans to people with a AAA rating" kind of level. There is another training article floating around, but he neither mentions frequency nor suggests what he actually does- he just gives recommendations for beginners that border on neglect and recommendations for advanced lifters that much be trolling, because no one is going to grow on the volume he recommends, nor bench 500... or even 300. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0RlXwq_8Un2VtYEZdsBPnL3T-21PT8HjALpnucA_4xhd_62cHvLE2cSO6wiG02horPVtHZC0geieiWXZBsH2RsxWodYVUgoKrZblc1XQEFR0h-Q34aecZCo3nXp9HBUpEMJU0egec9CwR/s1600/john-mcwilliams.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="289" data-original-width="208" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0RlXwq_8Un2VtYEZdsBPnL3T-21PT8HjALpnucA_4xhd_62cHvLE2cSO6wiG02horPVtHZC0geieiWXZBsH2RsxWodYVUgoKrZblc1XQEFR0h-Q34aecZCo3nXp9HBUpEMJU0egec9CwR/s1600/john-mcwilliams.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The gist, however, is that McWilliams was a big fan of:</span><br />
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<li><b><a href="https://evofitness.ch/exercise-week-kettlebell-side-press/" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Side Press</span></a></b></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Behind the Neck Press</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> (with the lift started on the shoulders, not at full extension</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">, and 5 deep breaths between reps with the back on your shoulders)</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Straight Arm Pulldowns</b></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> (narrow grip)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Bench</b> (absolutely no arch, high volume)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pushups and Military Press</b> (supersetted)</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp_c4EufFlNuuLSGWyCeXu8cqo7rgeMMpYdrDrkm7mETZLT4ieS2C36S4q8qYfFIC3YPZUrM7h20WjKtWfjHHwo8-rzDRzCIZRXdUumR1K5_CB6neIoF3Mlq9R-vZZAXdnd1RySJlfGIBp/s1600/johnmcwilliamspiczq6.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="781" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgp_c4EufFlNuuLSGWyCeXu8cqo7rgeMMpYdrDrkm7mETZLT4ieS2C36S4q8qYfFIC3YPZUrM7h20WjKtWfjHHwo8-rzDRzCIZRXdUumR1K5_CB6neIoF3Mlq9R-vZZAXdnd1RySJlfGIBp/s1600/johnmcwilliamspiczq6.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Beyond that, McWilliams was also adamant about these things:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Massaging your triceps after exercise- this is key to increasing blood flow and keeping the muscle healthy enough for a three-days-per-week pounding.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Consistent hard training- consistency is the thing that kept McWilliams from having to ever make that thousand dollar payout.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Proper nutrition, including supplements.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sufficient rest, relaxation and growth promoting sleep.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And there you have your roadmap to putting another inch plus on your arms before summer ends. Following this plan, you'll look like you've put on 20lbs just from the increase in arm circumference... and don't act like you're above having huge fucking arms or a big bench, tough stuff. Short of jacking Synthol, there's no such fucking thing as arms that are too muscular, so get with the fucking program and show up to Labor Day barbecues with a set of guns that'll have every motherfucker there screaming the national anthem because the only thing that makes arms like yours legal is the Second Amendment (and for you foreigners, find some similar reason, or just do it because big fucking arms are awesome).</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqOKDXa2oeD13m7SsgMQGVfOIZ1JBhNCpqHLk3ONopTPVIObCD2oS3TU9jLOtJOG69uWkDWsfqjbzdOV83N4L-PU2Ix-QQaSspI2kyGZ6mnBLTikB9G3qtUDKQoFMuewfobVmwL0c37vFY/s1600/john+mcwillims.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="480" data-original-width="357" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjqOKDXa2oeD13m7SsgMQGVfOIZ1JBhNCpqHLk3ONopTPVIObCD2oS3TU9jLOtJOG69uWkDWsfqjbzdOV83N4L-PU2Ix-QQaSspI2kyGZ6mnBLTikB9G3qtUDKQoFMuewfobVmwL0c37vFY/s320/john+mcwillims.jpg" width="238" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Sources:</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McWilliams, John. Triceps Development. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 11 Aug 2008. Web. 10 Jul 2018. </span><a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/08/triceps-development-john-mcwilliams.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/08/triceps-development-john-mcwilliams.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Mozee, Gene. John McWilliams Arm Routine. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 15 Feb 2008. Web. 10 Jul 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/02/john-mcwilliams-arm-routine.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/02/john-mcwilliams-arm-routine.html</a></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com21tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-82610223321840590572018-07-15T14:31:00.000-04:002018-07-19T11:57:57.809-04:00 Hugh Cassidy- Teeth Are For Strongman And Eating Your Way Through Sticking Points<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhywgSOmhlwEJ9dut512UdY1avbsceyaNXEbAMlw_pzPCnaSUVRl7-44acU6an6xpEgnJlPl8T_vkCmHhyphenhyphenT-nLi0IvJ_Tdz49xSVxGLN7icBXmd4fT8WsgC5M0R4bP9BhMY0PzIBb0JWk2V/s1600/the-babadook-storybook.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="621" data-original-width="1413" height="281" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhywgSOmhlwEJ9dut512UdY1avbsceyaNXEbAMlw_pzPCnaSUVRl7-44acU6an6xpEgnJlPl8T_vkCmHhyphenhyphenT-nLi0IvJ_Tdz49xSVxGLN7icBXmd4fT8WsgC5M0R4bP9BhMY0PzIBb0JWk2V/s640/the-babadook-storybook.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Plateaus- exactly like the Babadook, only scary and real.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Plateaus are the ever-present bane of every lifter's existence. Over time, a lot of us just develop the ability to change our focus- we switch from powerlifting to bodybuilding, to variations on the Olympic lifts, to strongman, to Crossfit, or whatever strikes our fancy. The same weight will be waiting there for us when we return to whatever our previous focus was however, looming over us like the goddamned Babadook, only far less horrifically unscary and far more real. There is another way, though, and it doesn't involve a five year training plan and spending enough money to put a third world kid to college for a couple of years- <i>eating</i>.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6feMujr2CkzzAYB5vvMHM42d3p1zqUW5UrzAt4O-_S_66Ycx9gch8nO6zgxbtttDNTwirmncg-M11vInWV-hDVgpxF0V6Va2eHI2sRm5D54cTOB5piWk3400liwheoegaqzHnVdLUh36i/s1600/cassidy-powerlifting-barbell-squat+%25283%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="373" data-original-width="590" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6feMujr2CkzzAYB5vvMHM42d3p1zqUW5UrzAt4O-_S_66Ycx9gch8nO6zgxbtttDNTwirmncg-M11vInWV-hDVgpxF0V6Va2eHI2sRm5D54cTOB5piWk3400liwheoegaqzHnVdLUh36i/s1600/cassidy-powerlifting-barbell-squat+%25283%2529.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Ever want to know why Ripp tells people to look down when squatting? Question answered.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">More specifically, the best way to blast through plateaus is (not coincidentally) the approach of the subject of this article:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;"><b>"train like a psycho, eat everything in sight, rest up, and grow gargantuan"</b></span> (Gallagher <i>Primitive</i> 34).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Clearly, the foregoing articles on <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/full-fucking-redux-baddest.html" target="_blank">Bruno Sammartino</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/a-public-service-announcement-from.html" target="_blank">Bruce Randall</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/behold-mighty-chuck-ahrens-whose-corpse.html" target="_blank">Chuck Ahrens</a>, <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/06/full-fucking-redux-baddest.html" target="_blank">Chuck Sipes</a>, and <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/who-fuck-says-you-have-to-squat-steve.html" target="_blank">Steve Merjanian</a> stressed this point as well, so I present this article at the risk of flogging a dead horse. It is a subject of interest to me, however, because I ignored it for about 25 years and it is only now, at the age of 41, that I realize the error of my ways. Having adopted this strategy and watched PR after PR fall in the gym driven solely by the force of my appetite, I feel like I need to be standing on a fucking milk crate in front of every gym on the planet screaming like one of those end of times lunatics raving about hellfire and corpse gods. If I had the ability I would travel back in time and beat my own ass like I was a group of heavily armed cops and my younger self was an unarmed black man. Like I was Ed Norton tuning up the singer from 30 Seconds to Mars. I would literally beat my younger self like I was my own dick, because it's about the only way my younger self would realize that the sacrifice of two abs to Khorne for a couple of years would mean that at the age of 41 I would likely be benching 500 rather than 415 and front squatting 600+ rather than 545, etc. At the time I thought that mass would come over time but I might as well sacrifice strength for abs in the meantime was as stupid as it was sad.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQokjogo2_bgFnUboYPeRrO1EFc9wzpXugj9N-mpduT3Oqx2tbg2b9XBm-IUr-4w_2u_EA2Z8EY9D914V-U1dRdUUUfeGzX2dVUZUyUysqrcxqAjqTG5D6ndSEJJ8Bwx3tNP4GOUkvVTWD/s1600/9016.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQokjogo2_bgFnUboYPeRrO1EFc9wzpXugj9N-mpduT3Oqx2tbg2b9XBm-IUr-4w_2u_EA2Z8EY9D914V-U1dRdUUUfeGzX2dVUZUyUysqrcxqAjqTG5D6ndSEJJ8Bwx3tNP4GOUkvVTWD/s1600/9016.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If Hugh Cassidy had only been able to tap into the "wealth" of knowledge on Instagram, he could have "fixed" his form and really put up big numbers.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Unlike a lot of the guys pushing huge poundages in powerlifting's infancy, Cassidy was not much of an athlete growing up. As a college junior he was 5'10" and 155lbs, and realized very quickly that he didn't have the size, strength, or ability to play football, so he bought a 110lb set of weights at a sporting goods store. By his own account,Cassidy was so weak he might as well have been a modern-day Channer- he had to take two trips to get a 110lb weight set into the house from the streetcar he'd taken to buy them. To say that the guy was not all that genetically predisposed to putting on muscle is like saying that a fistfight between Orlando Bloom and Justin Bieber would probably end in buttsex or that if you left a bowl of heroin sitting out in a roomful of musicians, it would probably be gone by the time you got back from the bathroom. After a year of training with that set, Cassidy was up to a whopping 156lbs and started looking around for other options. Instead of taking the modern tack and consulting a bunch of weak strangers with no muscle mass on how best to go about getting jacked, Cassidy hit his local YMCA and joined immediately upon seeing the most jacked dude he'd ever laid eyes on walk out the front door. Within six months of joining, simply aping the movements of the people around him, Cassidy was up to a respectable 185 pounds and took third in a local YMCA bodybuilding competition, a feat he repeated the following year.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLf2Gem_bhG5WypkHPjWQgTwZoeQkdXEiD_Sqm4WUZLmd7DWOIBFJ9K-Kl5yTPn2XmPM6X7ZiBcFI7DXxOJ12lrcGUOgdXHDMTszr4BbP3c68oFKWtOK59k110IceSkOa2lBbVnsVk4wVB/s1600/hugh+1+%25281%2529.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1199" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgLf2Gem_bhG5WypkHPjWQgTwZoeQkdXEiD_Sqm4WUZLmd7DWOIBFJ9K-Kl5yTPn2XmPM6X7ZiBcFI7DXxOJ12lrcGUOgdXHDMTszr4BbP3c68oFKWtOK59k110IceSkOa2lBbVnsVk4wVB/s640/hugh+1+%25281%2529.jpeg" width="479" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">After another two years he was up to 205 and joined the Army, where he started drinking seven or eight quarts (6.6L-7.5L) of milk a day and put on 46lbs <b>in six motherfucking weeks</b>. It is no exaggeration when I say that simply typing that sentence inspired me to get up and make a protein shake in 24oz of milk (where in the past I would have made a shake at a predetermined time and mixed in water, rather than just said fuck it and bombed down a massive shake in milk just because gainz). At that point he was big and strong enough that he decided to try his hand at Olympic lifting, posting an aggressively unimpressive 260lbs-200lbs-275lbs (the third being the press) because he had absolutely no clue how to do the lifts. It was then he realized he had no future in Olympic lifting, but he persisted in smashing weights and milk like they were ladyboi asspussy in a Thai whorehouse anyway.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbiUHnGaSzwy-atb_0VxEQXQvn7h_-dwsqEHy2CT7uWzc-Y8yQdlrL9Gofl2WtyvQbozzs4IJhoJMd5y4mBgiEWaWSGq71vLfn1J36667dmx_j3o7wdZKMB1g_lR6UkfvoASOUuARPiDw1/s1600/ba48a386f462aae5fd3b943caee133b6.21.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="272" data-original-width="488" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbiUHnGaSzwy-atb_0VxEQXQvn7h_-dwsqEHy2CT7uWzc-Y8yQdlrL9Gofl2WtyvQbozzs4IJhoJMd5y4mBgiEWaWSGq71vLfn1J36667dmx_j3o7wdZKMB1g_lR6UkfvoASOUuARPiDw1/s1600/ba48a386f462aae5fd3b943caee133b6.21.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Just like this.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">At that point, powerlifting was truly in its infancy, but although it was neither well-known nor well-respected, Cassidy was bitten by the powerlifting bug after watched the York Powerlifting Championships in 1965. After going apeshit training the powerlifts for a year, Cassidy entered his first powerlifting meet and posted a 1410 total at 242- nothing terribly exciting these days, but it was respectable in those. Bear in mind when you read his numbers going forward that powerlifting was not done then the way it is now. The lift order was bench-squat-deadlift, and the attempts were not separated into flights- they went strictly by weight. Thus, if your opener was so heavy that it was after the next strongest person's third attempt, you did all three attempts back to back, with 90 seconds between lifts. Same goes for the weak guys- if all three of their lifts were crazy light compared to the rest, they might be doing theirs back to back.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix5FRFnbIJZBNZUF-E8Dx5HR2HDIhwvHwCGDQ_3XiqmqhSJ4Pfni3RehkEx04H1th58RcjbJ2oyM1AF1WVPgHR5r7Ptasm-tfySUB8gO24j1X4h7QK7641ekHQsLLahiGqinRmQk-V6C9W/s1600/cassidy-williams-kuc-powerlifting.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="428" data-original-width="594" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEix5FRFnbIJZBNZUF-E8Dx5HR2HDIhwvHwCGDQ_3XiqmqhSJ4Pfni3RehkEx04H1th58RcjbJ2oyM1AF1WVPgHR5r7Ptasm-tfySUB8gO24j1X4h7QK7641ekHQsLLahiGqinRmQk-V6C9W/s1600/cassidy-williams-kuc-powerlifting.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In perhaps the last flattering photo ever taken of any of the three, a remarkably unincarcerated Big Jim Williams, Hugh, doing his best impression of Charlie Brown, an inexplicably brittle looking John Kuc, and Bob Hoffman with enough weird lapel medals to be tin pot dictator. I guess he forgot his epaulets that day.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">By 1969 Cassidy had found his groove and hit a 1765 total at 242 with 475-615-675, but it was the next year he really started to tear shit up, because he went back to strategy of "EAT MOTHERFUCKER" and hit a 2010 total at 275 with 540-730-740. Drink that in like a baby bird sucking down its momma's delicious puke- <b>by packing on an extra 30lbs of weight, his bench went up 65lbs, his squat went up 115lbs, and his deadlift went up 65lbs in a single year</b>, long after his noob gains had disappeared. The coup-de-gras was in 1971, though, when he defeated two absolute titans of powerlifting at the World Power Meet with a total of 2160, posting lifts of 570-800-790 at 291lbs (and absolutely no equipment- not even a belt). To say that is phenomenal progress hardly begins to describe these events, because hardly anyone on Earth makes those kinds of gains 15 years into lifting, and it all comes down to one thing- eating your fucking face off.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I think if I could get Catalina to predigest my shakes mama bird-style I could pack on mass even faster. If anyone has her contact info, I am willing to give that a shot... for science. There would be a marriage proposal in there for her as well to sweeten the deal.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Whatever you're thinking "eating your fucking face off" entails, you're thinking like a pussy. According to Marty Gallagher, when Cassidy was making the jump from 242 to heavyweight (there was no 308 class at that time), the man was a machine. When attending the first ever National Powerlifting Championships as a spectator, Cassidy waddled into the auditorium with a big-ass cooler full of milk and sandwiches- to be exact, a dozen sandwiches and two half gallons of milk. As the lifting progressed, Cassidy methodically destroyed the sandwiches one by one, washing them down with big-ass gulps from the milk cartons (Gallagher <i style="text-align: center;">Primitive </i>32). When at home, he'd drink extra pint cartons of milk between sandwiches and meals, and after dinner would drink a protein shake consisting of "two eggs, one instant breakfast, and two cups of powdered milk with a half gallon of skim milk in a large container" that he'd sip slowly while winding down for the evening (Cassidy "Long Road"). He continued that approach day in and day out, endless sandwiches and gallon after gallon of milk, until he ended up nine pounds short of his goal weight of 300 at the World Power Meet.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Ever the innovator, that man could come up with some weird-ass methods for moving weight. How he didn't end up on his face with this method is a mystery up there with the meaning of the Voynich Manuscript. Here is his reasoning for this method, explained:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>“Hugh Cassidy had us look at a spot on the floor roughly 3-4 feet in front of us as we squatted – this of course is totally contrary to everything taught in standardized powerlifting wherein the head is thrown up and back – Hugh felt this ‘site spot’ created a better spinal position for pushing – I teach this as an advanced technique – the triangle refers to the imaginary line that runs from ankle to ankle and from each ankle to the site spot”</b> (Furman).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That weight gain didn't come without a price, however. As Cassidy put it:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"I still plan to continue training although I'll be very happy to shed some of this excess poundage. Although I'm impressed with the "big guys" I find it isn't easy to be one of them without a lot of sacrifice. There is the constant sweating and the rashes that last until cooler winter weather. There is frequent acid indigestion and ever-present diarrhea from all the milk and eggs and protein powder. You have to walk like a duck or your thighs grind into hamburger. There are the spinal erectors that go into spasm whenever you walk up a grade and of course the food bill and the clothes that no longer fit. Big men's sizes are about as tasteful as some guy wrapped up in an awning. Most of my shirts look like I'm still in pajamas. What with the extra naps and the shortness of breath I've decided to reduce to the 242's again. I've been miserable these last two years but also very pleased with the gains in power" (Cassidy "Long Road"). </span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> In short, eating like you're training for the World's Hot Dog Eating Competition non-stop, year-round, takes its toll on a human being. Rather than being a fun-filled exploit wherein you simply see how much KFC you can jam down your throat in one sitting at all times, the type of aggressive eating required to make serious strength and size gains can be more miserable than being forced to binge watch alternating episodes of <i>The Golden Girls</i> and Antiques Roadshow, and in many ways is less pleasant than actually dieting to be lean.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"'<b>Eat your way through sticking points</b>!' </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">He'd say. If the poundage were feeling heavy on Saturday morning weighing 216, push your bodyweight to 220 by Wednesday and make those weights seem light" (Gallagher <i>Primitive</i> 35).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Such is life- if it were easy, everyone would do it, right? As for training, it's astonishing that Cassidy and his training partners weren't puking into trash cans through half of each session, since they were all following Cassidy's prescription for eating-until-half-dead. His training methods evolved over time, but the focus remained very simple- beat the living shit out of the main lifts and throw in minimal arm, shoulder, and neck work as supplementary work. The supplementary work was only included to prevent boredom (and a throwback to his bodybuilding past) that he even suggested people vary their hand spacing, sets, and reps- the man was all business (Niemi). For the World Meet, Cassidy's training looked like this (Cassidy "Long Road"):</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Hugh Cassidy's WR Training Routine</span></u></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><u>Monday/Friday</u></span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> - 135x15, 245x10, 345x6, 425x3, 475x3, 510x1, 530x1 or 2, 545x1.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press </b>(with two second pause) - 470x5, 505x3, 525x1 or 2, 545x1.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b> - 275x8, 435x5, 560x3, 650x3, 700x3, 725x3, 650x3, 670x3.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b> - 335x8, 535x5, 670x2, 750x2.</span><br />
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<u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Wednesday/Saturday</span></u><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Upright Row</b> (press grip, with straps) - 185x20, 225x12, 275x8, 205x15.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck Work</b> (with helmet, front) - 40x25, 60x25, 75x20, 50x40;</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck Work</b> (with helmet, back) - 40x25, 60x25, 75x20, 50x30.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"'<b>I'm so sick of this overtraining crap! It's such a cop out. It appeals to our laziest instincts. It says less is better and suggests there really is a substitute for hard work.</b></span> <span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Kid, when you're squatting 800 pounds, then we'll talk about overtraining. Work load capacity can be systematically increased.... You can improve the body's ability to work heavier, longer and more often. INTENSITY, DURATION and FREQUENCY is what we're talkin' in this gym'" (Cassidy and Gallagher).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For a while, Hugh decided to use his teeth for something other than endless sandwiches and turned his eye toward setting records in teeth lifting. For the life of me I cannot figure out what the logic is there- I have an easier time understanding why people might become furries and how two invariably fat people manage to make their naughty bits touch while dressed up like Disney characters. I'm assuming he read the biography of <a href="http://muscleoldschool.com/mighty-atom/" target="_blank">Joseph "The Mighty Atom" Greenstein</a> and was inspired, though I fail to understand why. The why, however, isn't important- for all we know Hugh liked fucking old ladies' church shoes and while dressed like a flamenco dancer. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/new-wrinkles-in-neck-work-hugh-cassidy.html" target="_blank">Hugh goes into great detail about his teeth training</a>, which is such a bizarre and specific type of strongman feat there's no real point in detailing the bits about strengthening your teeth, choosing a mouthguard. What should be of importance, however, is how the structure of his training changed to suit the specific type of strength he sought- and note the distinct lack of periodization, which Hugh stated at least once was a stupid fucking way to structure a program.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b><span style="font-size: large;">Hugh Cassidy's Teeth Lifting Program</span></b></u> (Cassidy "Teeth")</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlifts</b> – 335x8, 435x8, 505x8.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Upright</b> <b>Row</b> (press grip) – 115x15, 135x10x3sets, 115x15.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck Work</b> (helmet with weights loaded on a pipe on top) – 40x25x2, 55x25x2, 70x15, 70x20, 50x30x4.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Teeth</b> <b>Lifting</b> – 85x20, 150x15, 200x10, 250x5.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">There were two standard accessories from which Cassidy never strayed- neck work and the stiff legged deadlift. Neck work, Hugh (rightly) believed, was crucial to total body strength. Beyond aiding in the bench press by providing stability and being an obvious critical area of strength for teeth lifting, Hugh espoused direct neck work (which is basically listed above but covered in detail <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/new-wrinkles-in-neck-work-hugh-cassidy.html" target="_blank">here</a>) for anyone competing in contact sports because the next serves as a shock absorber, and for everyone else just because a person with a powerful looking neck is a powerful looking person. I can attest to the fact that I automatically have more respect for men with thick necks, little respect for pencil necks, and I want to fuck Gina Carano almost entirely due to her awesome neck. My lizard brain screams to me that I need to produce offspring with a woman who's got a neck bigger than most of the dudes reading this, and that our progeny would easily dominate coming generations simply by the authority and power derived from their massive necks.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hugh's other beloved assistance work was stiff legged deadlifts. As I alluded to above, Cassidy was a devout believer in the adage that the best assistance exercises are those that most closely match the lift itself- close grip bench for bench press, narrow stance squats for the squat, and the stiff legged deadlift for the deadlift (Gallagher "Trade"). To that end, every deadlift workout would conclude with two sets of stiff legged deadlifts, ultra strict, with the goal of turning lifters' spinal erectors "into industrial cranes" (Ibid). Occasionally done standing on a 3" thick 100lb plate, these would initially be pulled off the floor conventional, as a deficit deadlift, keeping the bar in contact with the shin the entire time. It'd then be lowered with a stiff-legged method, maintaining contact with the shin and a slight bend in the knee, light touch to the floor, and repeat. Like Chuck Sipes with the skull crusher, Cassidy and his lifters knew for a certainty that if their stiff legged deadlift PR increased, their deadlift would too. The ratio was different for every lifter, but seemed to hover in the 40-50lb range- ergo, if their stiff legged PR was 650, they were good for 700 or so on the conventional deadlift (Ibid).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy, at a lean 195lbs taking third yet again in a bodybuilding competition after retiring from PL.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">After setting his world record, Cassidy blew out his knee and retired from competing, but as you can see above, he definitely didn't quit lifting. Cassidy cut back down to 195 and competed in bodybuilding for a while, but he kept training powerlifters in his basement gym for years. A man after my own heart, Cassidy was Marilyn Manson-style weird- a metal sculpture artist in his spare time, Cassidy built demonic metal monstrosities that scared the living shit out of any Christians who happened to wander by his yard. Additionally, he was a badass guitarist and bass player, but the bulk of his ingenuity was devoted to new ways to torture his proteges into become powerlifting behemoths... and it worked. Cassidy coached retired semi-pro baseball player-turned-powerlifter Marshall "Doc" Peck to a 790lb squat, 530lb bench, and 710lb pull at 220 using what I assume was first gen powerlifting gear, and Mark "Duck" Dimiduk to an 800lb squat and deadlift and a 500lb bench at 220. Their program was even more brutal than the one Cassidy used to hit his world record total.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: large;"><u>Hugh Cassidy Training Split</u> </span></b>(Gallagher <i>Primitive</i> 34)</span><br />
<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Saturday</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>- Top set of 8 reps, then 3 back off sets of 10 reps (Week 1-4)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Top set of 5 reps, then 3 back off sets of 8 reps (Week 4-8) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Top set of 3 reps, then 3 back off sets of 5 reps (Week 8-12) </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- Same as squat cycle</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b>- Same as squat cycle</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- <b>Heaves</b> (Heavy high pulls)- 2-3 sets done explosively for 6-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- <b>Stiff Legged Deadlifts</b>- 2-3x5</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">*One of the two</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Bicep Curls</b>- 3-4x6-8</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">{<b>Tricep Pushdowns or Skullcrushers</b>- 3-4x6-8</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">* Arm work was generally supersetted</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">** 2-3 sets of 5 of close stance squats could follow squat if you want, and the same for bench, though generally he only had his lifters do deadlift assistance.</span><br />
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tuesday</span></b></u><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Repeat Saturday</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As to the loading for the backoff sets, here's how it worked:</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"'For a 500 pound squatter, we might go 145x15, 235x10, 325x7, 400x5. No suit, no wraps. Okay, after you work up to your heavy five rep set, reduce the weight to 275 or so an do a set of 10 reps. Take a five minute rest and load the bar to 300 and do a set of 10 reps. Rest about five more minutes and load the bar to 320 and do your final set of 10 reps. All three back-off sets must be done within 15 minutes. That's the cardinal rule. We're building reserve power here and increasing the body's workload capacity" (Cassidy and Gallagher).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3mxXM_fHK7flKycZhg_60oKvocO3N14yJiVAA0mUUja4kRz77W86fxVMnSp2THIN5N6A_C4Kf7tSBkyR8C6u11WU00BvwQnS0A0M8Ru7OkBbstlLt0HNNvscjaQa1LHXmIdMJuyhn-ukk/s1600/Demonic_Beauty_Horror_Porn1.-800x450.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="800" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3mxXM_fHK7flKycZhg_60oKvocO3N14yJiVAA0mUUja4kRz77W86fxVMnSp2THIN5N6A_C4Kf7tSBkyR8C6u11WU00BvwQnS0A0M8Ru7OkBbstlLt0HNNvscjaQa1LHXmIdMJuyhn-ukk/s640/Demonic_Beauty_Horror_Porn1.-800x450.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I couldn't find any pics of Hugh Cassidy's demonic art, but this seems to be a suitable replacement.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And there you have it- the best way to smash through sticking points and demolish plateaus isn't any of the happy horseshit you read about changing exercises and rep schemes, or finding a coach and paying him hundreds of ultimately wasted dollars to provide you with some tired routine that is almost guaranteed not to work. The best way to smash through sticking points and drive your lifts into the stratosphere is to eat like you're the glutton in the movie 7even and just try not to die at the end, then lift until you're practically bleeding from the eyes. Then sleep and repeat. Stop making this shit out to be harder than it is.</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">EAT YOUR WAY THROUGH STICKING POINTS!!</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy used protein shakes to blast through his sticking points, so it makes sense I might as well make it cheaper for the lot of us to get to 500lb benches. Use promo code Bloat20 at checkout to get 20% off your entire order at <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/" target="_blank">Chaos and Pain</a>- our badass whey <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-kraken-5lbs-whey-protein-blend/" target="_blank">Cannibal Kraken</a> is back in stock with 5 badass flavors (including Pumpkinhead Latte, which I've been adding to my <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/coffee/" target="_blank">Honduran Lempira Chaos and Pain coffee</a> like a basic Starbucks bitch).</span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy, Hugh. My long road to the top (1972). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 8 Oct 2017. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/my-long-road-to-top-hugh-cassidy-1972.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/my-long-road-to-top-hugh-cassidy-1972.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy, Hugh. New wrinkles in neck work (1973). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 16 Oct 2017. Web.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/new-wrinkles-in-neck-work-hugh-cassidy.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/new-wrinkles-in-neck-work-hugh-cassidy.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy, Hugh. Teeth lifting. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 15 Oct 2017. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/note-this-article-was-first-posted-here.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/note-this-article-was-first-posted-here.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Cassidy, Hugh and Marty Gallagher. All Trax Lead To Jax: A Modern Squatting Parable (1985). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 4 Mar 2017. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/03/a-modern-squatting-parable-hugh-cassidy.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/03/a-modern-squatting-parable-hugh-cassidy.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Furman, Tom. Really, really simple strength from Hugh Cassidy. Train for Life. 22 Nov 2006. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://www.tomfurman.com/really-really-simple-strength-from-hugh-cassidy/">http://www.tomfurman.com/really-really-simple-strength-from-hugh-cassidy/</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Gallagher, Marty. Trade Secret #77: Stiff-leg deadlift. Powerlifting Watch. 5 Feb 2008. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.powerliftingwatch.com/node/7221">https://www.powerliftingwatch.com/node/7221</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Gallagher, Marty. <i>Purposeful Primitive</i>. St. Paul: Dragon Door Publications, 2008.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">John, Dan. 10 things every lifter should be able to do. T-Nation. 10 Jun 2016. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.t-nation.com/training/10-things-every-lifter-should-be-able-to-do">https://www.t-nation.com/training/10-things-every-lifter-should-be-able-to-do</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Niemi, Paul. Power training simplified. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 2 Aug 2010. Web. 2 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/08/hugh-cassidy-paul-niemi.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/08/hugh-cassidy-paul-niemi.html</a></span><br />
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com29tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-13262712254468752552018-07-11T16:42:00.000-04:002018-07-11T16:56:07.009-04:00Berserker Or Zen Monk? Choosing The Path To Victory Means Knowing Yourself, Part 1<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Every time I have ever run across an article regarding the correct mindset for success in the gym or in sport, it was written with a specific viewpoint in mind is right and any other is patently incorrect. While I will state that I am unequivocally correct in my assertion, it's not because I pick one side or another. The proper mindset when training and competing, whether you are headbutting the fuck out of the bar and have a latex-clad dominatrix punting your balls before a lift, the chillest bro anyone's ever seen carve up Jaws in Maui, or ice man-serial-killer-quiet, is not a question with a catch-all answer. Instead, it's entirely dependent upon your personality and mentality.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yfqbwAeIPZdwwKwja_bnVUR5o6IGBrW6uXwZylGyjCK7fb4scnlDvRRAxNj7qX5eNt3krijfc2o3efE4TuI9-7MRpXwqGcUYDx1DN-JBgZUTB9h6LlqOe-SN0w1wWwHdD71iWAuEhhRP/s1600/vince.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="910" data-original-width="1100" height="330" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi-yfqbwAeIPZdwwKwja_bnVUR5o6IGBrW6uXwZylGyjCK7fb4scnlDvRRAxNj7qX5eNt3krijfc2o3efE4TuI9-7MRpXwqGcUYDx1DN-JBgZUTB9h6LlqOe-SN0w1wWwHdD71iWAuEhhRP/s400/vince.gif" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Half of it is incredibly useful and half of it appears to me to be utter garbage. the latter half made me wonder if I was just much more insane than I knew myself to be.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For years, I had wondered what in the fuck people were babbling about regarding the benefits of a cool head in compeition. I've definitely gotten myself overhyped and gotten under squat weights with my legs shaking like my name is Michael J. Fox, but acting like your typical USAPL lifter and listening to some smooth jazz and speaking in entirely PG language never helped anyone do anything other than annoy me in an elevator to my knowledge. In spite of this, people like Bradley Steiner and Frank Zane used to write about the evils of metal and aggression, and Vince Gironda would tear up memberships if people wore headphones in his gym.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0RxAdokWuPa1v2XeXZL6AIq5_Y4wLsMmFo16eL0PuB6zAO6Yjs1wzbfYReE4LWoNz_VQETBEfVWmsz62GaLqwx04prKVcGZQKVKB51NGZWgMikXcYnM4UbGbQEqQI_5zCTHGv8KDvvgcM/s1600/200.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="200" data-original-width="267" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0RxAdokWuPa1v2XeXZL6AIq5_Y4wLsMmFo16eL0PuB6zAO6Yjs1wzbfYReE4LWoNz_VQETBEfVWmsz62GaLqwx04prKVcGZQKVKB51NGZWgMikXcYnM4UbGbQEqQI_5zCTHGv8KDvvgcM/s1600/200.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">At the same time, I knew I liked getting hyped the fuck up in the gym and before competition, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOuAh22Ui68" target="_blank">Lattimer-in-<i>The Program</i>-style</a>, that martial music had been used for millennia to scare the opposition and encourage the combatants, that certain warrior cults would whip themselves into a frenzy for success in battle, and that <i>Muscle and Fitness</i>, <i>Flex</i>, and <i>Muscular Development</i> articles always contradicted the fuck out of <i>Ironman</i> magazine's authors by citing studies showing that aggressive music increases performance.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8c1JrwHEj2lIHIeDyDMPyGSvU5E7iTmTyfGmQvzR03gd80OjuADEWztah4xW114M8ORYPgwTZndjWOmOQlbZSySXPyjQkhInuREu1JVLMMkORplklOfv-9iRw2U9wdTg45TSdnwAG3OxH/s1600/8bba2f44ba9a22c3c6c9008e69ef28c4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="531" data-original-width="800" height="424" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8c1JrwHEj2lIHIeDyDMPyGSvU5E7iTmTyfGmQvzR03gd80OjuADEWztah4xW114M8ORYPgwTZndjWOmOQlbZSySXPyjQkhInuREu1JVLMMkORplklOfv-9iRw2U9wdTg45TSdnwAG3OxH/s640/8bba2f44ba9a22c3c6c9008e69ef28c4.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Flower arrangement vs facial rearrangement. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Holy shit, was I ready to riot at the end of this episode of deadliest warrior.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">What aggravated me about this situation most is the fact that no one seems to be willing to concede that there is a middle ground, and as it's obvious to anyone with a working set of fucking eyeballs there is. And that middle ground is very simple- Zen Buddhism, asceticism, and silence works for some people, while freaking the fuck out and running around like a maniac so hyped you're fucking bleeding adrenaline and testosterone works for others.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMw9JEDcwpu7jKXmP0og6ohVwPXGmtBrfKN4aPgK56LCVHc9nvO47hewNAjKObQOMJLzAj7JzSCIstDdhHcbVyciUaCzmDgWFVw6Bh2FSNGMiMLoiUFrcI1byebkuICXVvBCQQ7Os70UTk/s1600/peak-hard-dennis.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="375" data-original-width="500" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMw9JEDcwpu7jKXmP0og6ohVwPXGmtBrfKN4aPgK56LCVHc9nvO47hewNAjKObQOMJLzAj7JzSCIstDdhHcbVyciUaCzmDgWFVw6Bh2FSNGMiMLoiUFrcI1byebkuICXVvBCQQ7Os70UTk/s320/peak-hard-dennis.gif" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><u>The Science</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Getting Pyched / Getting Metal</b></span><br />
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In one study of twenty participants split between men and woman, their five rep bench press tested using "a free-choice psych-up, a cognitive distraction, and an attention-placebo." Peak force recorded after psyching-up was 12% higher in the psych-up group than the distraction, and over 8% from the placebo. Thus, the study showed that if you're a trainee with a year of training under your belt, <b>your peak force on the bench when you're pumped the fuck up will be considerably higher than people who are, say, fucking around on their phone between sets</b> or people who've done nothing to increase their focus, such as the people in Gironda's gym (Tod).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>There is something to that old school weight room battle cry</b>- it improves muscle activation and peak O2 and VO2 when busting your ass in the gym, and improved hand strength in one study by 7% (Chen, Welch).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Whether you get psyched by being happy or angry, either is a gift compared to being anxious or calm</b> in competition (Rathschlag).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Fast music benefits people exercising far more than slow music and which was more helpful than no music at all.</b> The perception of exertion isn't reduced, but the length of the workout was (Thakari, Thakur).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Even if you can't listen to music when you're competing, listening to music while you warmup increases your power output significantly</b> (Chtourou, Jarraya).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Music might be useful for fighters, Olympic lifters, and throwers</b>. Speed and reactivity in surgeons was increased significantly in those listening to music than not, especially where the surgeons played music they liked (Allen).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Music makes you more explosive</b>- it improved the velocity of takeoff and force development in squat jumps in one study (Biagini).</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijabd0Xwscu2Y2zO7sR7YHInG04VfuNyZvyjYTxADiVVlOYzEMS7ZObew9iyLLlaHZUgeUnO48-sU9VYZzit9bKIAOU6b5rOC6OzEukMqpFfEjnCWWt9MsuBb9jOLBM8VLr4zf75vSV4du/s1600/tough.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="281" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEijabd0Xwscu2Y2zO7sR7YHInG04VfuNyZvyjYTxADiVVlOYzEMS7ZObew9iyLLlaHZUgeUnO48-sU9VYZzit9bKIAOU6b5rOC6OzEukMqpFfEjnCWWt9MsuBb9jOLBM8VLr4zf75vSV4du/s1600/tough.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Psyched or Chill? It depends.</b></span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>There was a hell of a lot of variability in a study on the performance of karatekas while angry</b>. Performance ran the gamut on athletes by performance and the intensity of anger. "In best performances, the intensity of experienced anger was perceived as increasing the generation of energy whereas in worst performances, anger reflected an ineffective generation and utilization of resources (Ruiz).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Moderation seemed to be key in one study on the use of anger in rugby, and self-confidence is necessary for the control of anger and its effect on performance</b>. Importantly, however they found that "cognitive anxiety was a significant predictor of anger, while self-confidence was a significant predictor of control of anger" (Robazza).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Anger is indeed a gift, but one study showed that it was more a gift for extroverts than with introverts </b>(Woodman).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Psyching up does not help performance in 1RM in the squat, according to one study</b> (McGuigan).</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1cKPiHzqkJpe81e8yzNevdkMx2kxPdc9MXfm3Wkvo_35g1ZdDX3hyphenhyphenLkFqg_-AankqkWOwVL8p602yoqTSkc0gOeSNU5NGF439j9Sc7MFw-KHvbqbEjYV92d-tAEZUTzjevQrG8TY6lNtz/s1600/XILUdyC.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="294" data-original-width="720" height="163" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1cKPiHzqkJpe81e8yzNevdkMx2kxPdc9MXfm3Wkvo_35g1ZdDX3hyphenhyphenLkFqg_-AankqkWOwVL8p602yoqTSkc0gOeSNU5NGF439j9Sc7MFw-KHvbqbEjYV92d-tAEZUTzjevQrG8TY6lNtz/s400/XILUdyC.gif" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Vince Gironda probably screamed this at young whippersnappers in Venice Beach 20 times a day.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Chill the fuck out</b></span><br />
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<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Rate of perceived exertion (RPE) is lower when athletes train in silence</b> (Biagini).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Encouraging weaker training partners kills their performance</b>, so keep your mouth shut while you're training partner is lifting (Irwin).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Relaxing music lowers heart rate and RPE in high-intensity cardiovascular training</b> (Karageorghis)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Relaxing music lowers grip strength, but silence or exciting music don't do jack to improve grip strength,</b> so whatever you do, don't train in an elevator (Pearce)</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Thus far, it looks like the maniacs are taking it to the monks in our little "Deadliest Iron Warrior Sacrificing on the Throne of Crom" battle- just in getting psyched up and throwing in a yell or grunt when you attempt a lift it looks like you might be able to improve your force output by 20%, which is a hell of a lot. Hell- we've all lost a pull because of grip strength. Just imagine if you could get an extra 7% on your deadlift just from an old-school karate kiai. If you've got a 500lb pull, you're instantly pulling 535lbs just from making a bit of noise. Maybe all of this old school "meathead" shit isn't as worthless as whoever your favorite weaksauce evidence based coach might say.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">My man might have been built like a Redditor, but that kiai might have put him into Bodybuilding.com levels of "super strength."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Frankly, there is not a lot of scientific evidence out there that silence or being a chill bro will get you to the next level in strength sports, but as I will show in part two, there is some anecdotal evidence in that direction. As i said at the beginning, I obviously tend toward the "throw on the new Hate Diplomacy (<a href="https://hatediplomacy.bandcamp.com/album/rant" target="_blank">which fucking slams</a>), rip off my shirt, and terrorize everyone in the gym wearing a loincloth and bleeding all over the equipment," but one of the reasons I rarely interject my personal experience into these articles is that I want to give you guys the ability to make an informed decision on your own. As such, Part 2 of this series will have the anecdotal evidence for both sides. The list of shit I have in various stages of completion is absolutely preposterous, running the gamut from an extremely unique dieting style based on ancient history, John McWilliams (the first guy with 20" arms was not in fact Leroy Colbert), Jon Cole, a few others 1950s guys you've likely never heard of, and Part 2 of the Training for the Apocalypse Series (Robot Rape and the Nuclear Option).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Until then, here's Bud Jeffries' take on the debate:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"It's an interesting topic. I've done it both ways. I've actually come to a place where I feel like those are both doors to the same room so to speak one from the angry side and one from the calm side. Today I actually view them similar to the way the Chinese view Qi Gong. With the berserker style being a hard chigong and the calm stop being a soft chigong. I grew up in the old school powerlifting gym and American football atmosphere rowdy and slapping and berserker type. Later I'm adopted a more calm style through the influence of martial arts that really more so from the years I spent performing as a professional strongman. In a three-year time span I did literally 1000 anti-bullying shows in schools. Each show had about 6 feats of strength. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Now what you doing a show isn't max effort usually but you still have to be able to immediately give a person strength and go right back to talking without missing a breath. To do that you need to be in shape but you also need to be able to harness and immediately get to the mental place to do a feet of strength at the snap of a finger and then go right back to the flow of speaking. I think both are useful at the appropriate time but I also think you get more mental training out of learning to be calm and immediately turn on and off your adrenaline / mental power. I have found that stronger when I remain calm and then immediately go into action versus spend a lot of time doing psyching. The problem with a beserker style is it tends to burn up a ton of mental energy and you start to become dependent on it. In other words I want to be able to spring into action at a moment's notice without having to spend 5 minutes getting my head together and banging on the wall. I think it can be a good thing for young guys because they almost like a learning process they need to go through. And sometimes they have a lot of anger they got a harness and get in a positive direction instead of unleashing it in stupid ways. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The problem I see with using a berserker style long-term is that you develop your own Pavlovian response. That means this if you're teaching yourself to be angry all the time that starts to flow outside of the gym as well and every time you walk into the gym you immediately get that overly tense response because your condition to it. This is going to sound weird but I have actually found on strongest when I'm laughing. I think that comes from a place of add a lot of background of focusing so I can be focused very quickly and still actually display other qualities. But I also think when you laugh you you gotten past any kind of fear with a thing, or past taking things overly serious which I have the tendency to do in regard to lifting, and into the pure joy of what's going on and I tend to respond best to that. When I was young I be mad for days if I missed a lift. Now I simply go on and make it later. kind of like this I want to condition myself for that endorphin response and happiness to be built up through my workout instead of to get there through going through a hard mental place and being exhausted. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Still have that absolutely intense desire that comes with the berserker style but it just comes out in a much more calm use of energy and maniacal laughing way, haha."</span></blockquote>
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Allen K, Blascovich J. Effects of music on cardiovascular reactivity among surgeons. JAMA. 1994 Sep 21;272(11):882-4.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Andrew, Evan. 8 legendary battle cries. History. 21 may 2015. Web. 4 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.history.com/news/8-legendary-battle-cries">https://www.history.com/news/8-legendary-battle-cries</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Biagini MS, Brown LE, Coburn JW, Judelson DA, Statler TA, Bottaro M, Tran TT, Longo NA. Effects of self-selected music on strength, explosiveness, and mood. J Strength Cond Res. 2012 Jul;26(7):1934-8.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chen CL, Yu NY, Tang JS, Chang SH, Yang YR, Wang L. Effect of yelling on maximal aerobic power during an incremental test of cycling performance. J Sport Sci. 2016 Dec;5(4):456-61.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chtourou H, Chaouachi A, Hammouda O, Chamari K, Souissi N. Listening to music affects diurnal variation in muscle power output. Int J Sports Med. 2012 Jan;33(1):43-7. doi: 10.1055/s-0031-1284398.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Coombes, Kevin Flanagan. The Irish war cry and what it meant to the Celtic tribes in battle. Irish Central. 6 May 2017. Web. 4 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.irishcentral.com/roots/history/the-irish-war-cry-and-what-it-meant-to-the-celtic-tribes-in-battle">https://www.irishcentral.com/roots/history/the-irish-war-cry-and-what-it-meant-to-the-celtic-tribes-in-battle</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Gibbons, Phil. Craziest facts about Viking berserkers, history's hardcore Norse warrior-shamans. Ranker. Web. 16 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.ranker.com/list/viking-berserker-facts/philgibbons">https://www.ranker.com/list/viking-berserker-facts/philgibbons</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hughes GM, Rudin-Brown CM, Young KL. A simulator study of the effects of singing on driving performance. Accid Anal Prev. 2013 Jan;50:787-92.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Irwin BC, Feltz DL, Kerr NL. Silence is Golden: Effect of Encouragement in Motivating the Weak Link in an Online Exercise Video Game. J Med Internet Res. 2013 Jun; 15(6): e104.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Jarraya, M., Chtourou, H., Aloui, A., Hammouda, O., Chamari, K., Chaouachi, A., & Souissi, N. The Effects of Music on High-intensity Short-term Exercise in Well Trained Athletes. Asian J Sports Med. 2012 Dec; 3(4): 233–238.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McCoy, Daniel. Berserkers and other shamanic warriors. Norse Mythology for Smart People. Web. 16 Jun 2018. <a href="https://norse-mythology.org/gods-and-creatures/others/berserkers-and-other-shamanic-warriors/">https://norse-mythology.org/gods-and-creatures/others/berserkers-and-other-shamanic-warriors/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McGuigan MR, Ghiagiarelli J, Tod D. Maximal strength and cortisol responses to psyching-up during the squat exercise. J Sports Sci. 2005 Jul;23(7):687-92.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McManus, Mark. Muscle mind hack #2 – Use music for more muscle and strength! Musclehack. 10 Jun 2009. Web. 4 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.musclehack.com/muscle-mind-hack-2-use-music-for-more-muscle-strength/">https://www.musclehack.com/muscle-mind-hack-2-use-music-for-more-muscle-strength/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Paul, Annie Murphy. Does Listening to Music While Working Make You Less Productive? Time. 12 Sep 2012. Web. 4 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ideas.time.com/2012/09/12/does-listening-to-music-while-working-make-you-less-productive/">http://ideas.time.com/2012/09/12/does-listening-to-music-while-working-make-you-less-productive/</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Pearce K.A. Effects of different types of music on physical strength. Perceptual and Motor Skills. 1981;53:351–352.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rathschlag M, Memmert D. The influence of self-generated emotions on physical performance: an investigation of happiness, anger, anxiety, and sadness. J Sport Exerc Psychol. 2013 Apr;35(2):197-210.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Robazza C, Bortoli L. Perceived impact of anger and anxiety on sporting performance in rugby players. J Sport Exerc Psychol. 2007 Nov;8(6):875–896.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Ruiz MC, Hanin YL. Perceived impact of anger on performance of skilled karate athletes. J Sport Exerc Psychol. 2011 Jun;12(3):242–249.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Thakare AE, Mehrotra R, Singh A. Effect of music tempo on exercise performance and heart rate among young adults. Int J Physiol Pathophysiol Pharmacol. 2017; 9(2): 35–39.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Thakur AM, Yardi SS. Effect of different types of music on exercise performance in normal individuals. Indian J Physiol Pharmacol. 2013 Oct-Dec;57(4):448-51.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tod DA, Iredale KF, McGuigan MR, Strange DEO, Gill N. J Strength Cond Res. 2005 Aug;19(3):599-603</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Welch AS, Tschampl M. Something to Shout About: A Simple, Quick Performance Enhancement Technique Improved Strength in Both Experts and Novices. 2012;24(4):418-28.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Woodman T, Davis PA, Hardy L, Callow N, Glasscock I, Yuill-Proctor J.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> Emotions and sport performance: an exploration of happiness, hope, and anger. J Sport Exerc Psychol. 2009 Apr;31(2):169-88.</span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com26tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-75355940400868392392018-07-02T22:33:00.000-04:002018-07-04T13:29:31.655-04:00Fuck Buying Weight Gainers- Bulking Shakes Of The Golden Age<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the aftermath of my run of articles about brobdingnagian badasses from the era of surf rock (if listening to that dogshit was the key to a 500lb bench I'd stop doing the fucking lift altogether) I've received a steady stream of inquiries for more details on their diets, programs, and gainer shakes in particular. Though I've covered some of the shakes <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2014/10/the-simplicity-of-dieting-it-really-is.html" target="_blank">here</a> and <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/tips/youve-gotta-eat-big-if-you-wanna-get-big/" target="_blank">here</a>, it seemed worth digging a bit deeper into the subject, because if there is any bigger, Santa Claus-sized back of baby back bullshit than the commercial weight gain shake in the supplement industry, I have no idea what it is. Commercial weight gainers are nothing more than overpriced whey mixed with sugar, and all that is going to get you is fat and bloated enough that you'll look like you're prepping to slap on some blackface and rock out with your cock (or lady cock) out in <i>Medea's Family Gets Diabetes Again</i>. I realize that the foregoing sentence presumes you're white, but given the fact that Wayne Brady is far more thuggish than the couple of black dudes I know who read this site, they'd likely have to slap on a few coats of tanner and megadose Melanotan 2 for an entire summer while watching <i>Boyz in the Hood</i> on repeat to be black enough to receive a ghetto pass. I'm not saying they're Carlton from Fresh Prince-style white, but they would have to be wearing iced fronts and holding a goblet of Purple Drank to even be street enough to make it into a Kid n' Play movie.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">New Line <a href="http://www.joblo.com/horror-movies/news/new-line-considered-making-freddy-vs-jason-vs-kid-n-play-129" target="_blank">damn near made Freddy vs Jason vs Kid n' Play</a>, which would have been the greatest cinematic achievement in history. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The demographics of my audience aside, my hatred of commercially-produced weight gain shakes and recent interest in 1950's and 60's strength training luminaries has produced an answer for those of you who want to pack on the mass without resorting to eating McDonald's and hot dogs all the live-long day- old school weight gain protein shake recipes. These recipes will be off-putting at first to great many of you due to their insanely high calories and fat content, but there is a very thoughtful method to the weight gaining madness of Golden Age of bodybuilding and prehistoric era of powerlifting.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Contrary to the assertion of every douche who's ever pushed up on a girl while she's trying to lift, <a href="https://jezebel.com/a-complete-breakdown-of-the-nutritional-content-of-seme-953356816" target="_blank">cum is not a good source of protein</a> and thus would not qualify as a post-workout shake or a Rheo Blair-style "protein pudding."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The recipes of this era focus on a caloric balance between fat and protein, which protein powder pioneer Rheo H. Blair considered essential. Blair was the first real phenom in the supplement industry, using himself and other test subjects for experimental trials training in his state-of-the-art facility and protein meal/shake. Blair himself referred to it as protein pudding due to its thickness, and his own progress in the gym and testimonials from his trial subjects set the lifting world afire like a seaman's dick after shore leave in the Philippines. </span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Don Howorth looking big as fuck at 51, with Vince Gironda. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hoffman and others followed right on Blair's heels with protein shakes of their own, but where Blair's drink was a surprisingly modern and tasty milk and egg blend, the rest of the proteins on the market were foul tasting, man titty bestowing soy. Nevertheless, everyone in the lifting scene started chugging shakes and swore up and down by them. Everyone from legendary weightlifter <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2014/07/blast-from-past-completely-rewritten.html" target="_blank">Paul Anderson</a> to bodybuilding phenom Don Howorth to super saiyan bodybuilding trainer Vince Gironda to Bruce motherfucking Lee were downing shakes like Japanese weirdos eating the ass cheeks off of Dutch students, and all of them credited the shakes with helping them pack on mass and build strength.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"We would mix the powder with heavy thick cream, half & half, throw some ice cubes in it, mix it so it was like a pudding and eat, not drink it. It was delicious. We would eat this throughout the day eating perhaps 4-5 servings per day. The idea was to keep our bodies filled with protein all day long."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Once I started [supplementing like this], I blew up. Gained tremendous size without gaining bulk. My waist stayed the same. This freaked me out. I still had good definition"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- Larry Scott, <b>who used four pounds of Rheo Blair's protein every eight days while training for his 1966 Mr. Olympia win </b>(Wayne).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">No matter which powder was being being used, the consensus was that protein shakes should be calorie dense as a fucking neutron star and made with either store-bought half and half or (preferably) a homemade mix of half cream and half milk. As Rheo H. Blair said himself, </span><br>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"The preferred liquid for mixing the protein is half-and-half, and for a good reason. Nature seems to indicate that protein and fat should be taken in even balance. Milk with 3% protein is balanced with an equal amount of fat. Likewise eggs, meat, etc."</span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"By mixing the protein [powder] with half whole milk and half heavy cream, we restore some of the fat removed during processing, and we achieve a product more normally balanced as to proportions of protein and fat … One may use the protein in pure cream, with no milk at all! (Blair).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0ekXwBR5QvRAaNM-NcBn3AMFUwFOwwOp9t6ryvvEHWZHHXsf5xbVfWAQgKxiYC75xmyjxK965yHDX2br3seP_aSGNs284yOzDst5Knnb65SOv9vueBgDiKVmxK-VNrIrHctcQKNkbmnk3/s1600/man-scalp-peel-overhang-wound-clean.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="819" data-original-width="513" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0ekXwBR5QvRAaNM-NcBn3AMFUwFOwwOp9t6ryvvEHWZHHXsf5xbVfWAQgKxiYC75xmyjxK965yHDX2br3seP_aSGNs284yOzDst5Knnb65SOv9vueBgDiKVmxK-VNrIrHctcQKNkbmnk3/s400/man-scalp-peel-overhang-wound-clean.jpg" width="250"></span></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That's about how appetizing I find low fat bodybuilding diets.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I'll admit that when I read this when coming up I was beyond dubious, having been raised in the fat-phobic 1980's and 1990's and weaned on bodybuilding mags touting the tired-ass and ultimately counter-productive chicken breast/broccoli/rice diet that was all the rage in those days. As such, i used a small amount of skim milk and left a lot of gains on the table. in the years when i was keto I left even more gains on the table by failing to sacrifice a little in the way of carbs for gaining the anabolic benefit of half and half, so I continued fucking up. Now that I'm older and wiser, I'm using half and half and 2% in my shakes and growing like never before. I'm generally loathe to give this kind of personal anecdote because for some reason I think that it diminishes my academic credentials in ways that apparently hardcore porn and gore don't (it's logical if you're a borderline sociopath). And if my personal experience is uncompelling, consider the following:</span><br>
<br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Lower fat diets are not nearly as anabolic as moderate to high fat diets because a reduction in dietary fat invariably leads to a decrease androstenedione, testosterone and free testosterone (Hämäläinen).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Increasing the dietary fat intake of athletes to 42% has a crazy effect on both your immune system and your exercise endurance. You'll spend less time sick and a hell of a lot more time in the gym or pushing the sled, because it "improves endurance exercise performance at 60-80% of VO2max in cyclists, soldiers, and runners" (Venkatraman).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Diets with insufficient fat and protein fully fuck strength athletes and heavy weight trainers, because that kind of diet destroys your serum T and free testosterone (Sallinen).</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8CtGnnfP1_OEELHbxH00F7Kwk0DfbGseaNeG7zcWLyP8aZRJR8mx-fuLTCSXhYg7fj3unV-bAvCK67Zd9827OaEqdtBDgDdEF0-yWRNnDDhmHD_6iKBJRfi3HYPErUsmZHQP8ltD5CJw4/s1600/quote-i-would-like-to-be-the-first-man-in-the-gym-business-to-throw-out-my-scale-if-you-don-vince-gironda-54-84-44.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="850" height="188" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh8CtGnnfP1_OEELHbxH00F7Kwk0DfbGseaNeG7zcWLyP8aZRJR8mx-fuLTCSXhYg7fj3unV-bAvCK67Zd9827OaEqdtBDgDdEF0-yWRNnDDhmHD_6iKBJRfi3HYPErUsmZHQP8ltD5CJw4/s400/quote-i-would-like-to-be-the-first-man-in-the-gym-business-to-throw-out-my-scale-if-you-don-vince-gironda-54-84-44.jpg" width="400"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Finally, Vince Gironda himself had this to add:</span><br>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"A word to those who do not understand cholesterol: Exercise is the very best fat emulsifier known, because man still reacts to stress (which is the primary cause of cholesterol overproduction) as he did when in a primitive state. Cholesterol calls for action (Fight or Flight). Cholesterol prepares you in case of injury (stops bleeding if you are cut, or protects a rupture of veins). Also, a little known fact is that the body manufactures more cholesterol that you can possibly eat. The body reduces cholesterol output - or produces more - depending on how much of it you ingest. Fats and oils are fat emulsifiers themselves (lepotropics). So, who started the misconception that fats and oils cause unnatural cholesterol levels? As a matter of fact, if you study this problem you will find it is a substance known as tri-glyceride that is the culprit" (Gironda).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg778kx6uSI9qkTXX9sd1kDzb8V64OHlAIjnt4bsHA_7AedX41iiTNOytyX4CIjuUEHf24ZgpatH1LDZmUzwE1eFu1Rq1Ha_ON28EyUTbxNcR4aXKrFnv3XPqxW718e6xmYpIsuPpGrUiZo/s1600/bill+smith.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="934" data-original-width="700" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg778kx6uSI9qkTXX9sd1kDzb8V64OHlAIjnt4bsHA_7AedX41iiTNOytyX4CIjuUEHf24ZgpatH1LDZmUzwE1eFu1Rq1Ha_ON28EyUTbxNcR4aXKrFnv3XPqxW718e6xmYpIsuPpGrUiZo/s640/bill+smith.jpg" width="479"></span></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Actor Bill Smith was also put on to Rheo Blair's insanely effective shakes and became the Arnold before there was Arnold.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As to consuming them, Blair was surprisingly adamant that his protein shakes be sipped or slowly eaten as pudding- never, ever chugged. This is an anathema to me- I would no sooner sip a protein shake than I would a shot of tequila. The entire idea seems weirdly perverse, yet guys in the 60's and 70's swore up and down that this method was the way to go.</span><br>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"The way you get this protein mixture into the stomach is important. Mistakes at this point can spell disappointing results. The protein drink is never to be gulped. It is to be sipped slowly. Some persons should take at least 30 minutes to get the glassful swallowed. </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The same goes for milk, which ought always to be sipped slowly, taking fifteen minutes to sip a glassful. To make it easier, use a straw and pinch the end together. This puts milk into the stomach at the same rate a baby does, and that is the best way. </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Now, we don't suggest sitting and looking at the drink for thirty minutes! Sip it slowly while you keep busy at other things like getting ready in the morning, working, studying, working out, etc. </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">You might do as Don Howorth does. First thing in the morning he would mix or pour the protein drink and start sipping. Then he'd shower and sip some more. After shaving, some more. After thirty minutes or so he's ready to sip the last and start the day's work. </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This slow sipping is important. Many people I meet do not have the ability to digest foods as efficiently or to metabolize them as readily as they should. Putting foods into the stomach slowly helps to handle them more efficiently" (Blair).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSurn4shOSgVEIs1OQIvDwhhjvztktSfdRs7UxL3T4eJUq8EJ2DPVSRJtnYnhwA3xwUspOKYpQm-PmT80PWwJOIHKwJ-Vq6esksMoDALkQpCbCCXWrMfB1CaxfDn3JFkcGoWBP_-jD6ONe/s1600/WarnerBrosClassic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="324" data-original-width="720" height="288" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSurn4shOSgVEIs1OQIvDwhhjvztktSfdRs7UxL3T4eJUq8EJ2DPVSRJtnYnhwA3xwUspOKYpQm-PmT80PWwJOIHKwJ-Vq6esksMoDALkQpCbCCXWrMfB1CaxfDn3JFkcGoWBP_-jD6ONe/s640/WarnerBrosClassic.jpg" width="640"></span></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It likely won't come as a shock that of the 1973 Gold's Gym competitors, Arnold, Franco, Ken Waller, and Ric Drasin were all huge proponents of Rheo Blair's supplements and methods.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Having explained the whys and the wherefores of these badass bulking shakes, here are a couple of old school recipes you can use to pack on some mass and start moving some weight.</span><br>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Blair's Creamy Delicious</u></b></span><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 cup light cream</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 cup lowfat milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 scoops of protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 tablespoon vanilla extract</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 eggs (drop in boiling water 30 seconds)</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3a7PEPL5L4BNUHhBHJsmdqCZxTwsoPYzMXzvrom6b8PQav5zFgNH7xeTntPS9XFewJx0hbtF0wPSOiqJYlETi-Kd_zV5i23F-o02eQTjh2oW0On3__OkrYxYUM8Ryj8yf9XRfGQpji1Sz/s1600/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25282%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="486" data-original-width="634" height="306" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg3a7PEPL5L4BNUHhBHJsmdqCZxTwsoPYzMXzvrom6b8PQav5zFgNH7xeTntPS9XFewJx0hbtF0wPSOiqJYlETi-Kd_zV5i23F-o02eQTjh2oW0On3__OkrYxYUM8Ryj8yf9XRfGQpji1Sz/s400/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25282%2529.png" width="400"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Blair's Light Creamy</span></u></b><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 cup half and half (8 ounces)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 cup whole milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 scoops of protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 tablespoon vanilla extract</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgay-I6czJGO-WFJn84ZjQvX8zBfMshGU6XNwtAmAO-NuXS3zF_2YXc9pCUw4Tp6PUUuenjcJLqvZlhZp9e0_uAxGl2Kc4kRwt1W2uFsdZO8zY49X0NY0WC9yd3R7aZB9sNoYM8FNIYjhHf/s1600/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25283%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="487" data-original-width="634" height="245" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgay-I6czJGO-WFJn84ZjQvX8zBfMshGU6XNwtAmAO-NuXS3zF_2YXc9pCUw4Tp6PUUuenjcJLqvZlhZp9e0_uAxGl2Kc4kRwt1W2uFsdZO8zY49X0NY0WC9yd3R7aZB9sNoYM8FNIYjhHf/s320/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25283%2529.png" width="320"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Blair's Yogurt Delight</span></u></b><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 scoops of protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 ounces half and half</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 cup plain yogurt</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12 ounces of 2% milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 tablespoon vanilla extract</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYdsJ2e2I0W_nVqDPWvhZpuuTjFlDYj2qCKgO-bR_c9Q8DE5QfN3qg_sijBI_Ey35zpMiimKDPdfwlZLvKIcaugA_SHT9bg0EsWu-lpp3bz3GYmCPMmRA083aK1yh3_kUT2HaodlFc2XSz/s1600/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25281%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="486" data-original-width="633" height="306" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYdsJ2e2I0W_nVqDPWvhZpuuTjFlDYj2qCKgO-bR_c9Q8DE5QfN3qg_sijBI_Ey35zpMiimKDPdfwlZLvKIcaugA_SHT9bg0EsWu-lpp3bz3GYmCPMmRA083aK1yh3_kUT2HaodlFc2XSz/s400/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets+%25281%2529.png" width="400"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Blair's California Coconut Delight</span></u></b><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 scoops of protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 ounces of light cream</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12 ounces of 2% lowfat milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 tablespoons coconut extract</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 egg boiled for 30 seconds</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCMiVuQRRtV76TUsRegGo0fE3-Uubwvfiaxrr9nyh3AHXtmWdM7PQip-pZdlnECO9oRKkAnrw_u6fLPBo38H4gB8u1smqtoXtUtRdqi1x-A6p_1t77kMztthlO37ZNOs49_p7Qd54nFlx_/s1600/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="488" data-original-width="632" height="308" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCMiVuQRRtV76TUsRegGo0fE3-Uubwvfiaxrr9nyh3AHXtmWdM7PQip-pZdlnECO9oRKkAnrw_u6fLPBo38H4gB8u1smqtoXtUtRdqi1x-A6p_1t77kMztthlO37ZNOs49_p7Qd54nFlx_/s400/Untitled+spreadsheet+++Google+Sheets.png" width="400"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Blair suggested that you "freeze these recipes in an ice cream freezer or divide into individual portions in cups and place in the freezer. Before eating thaw the ice cream slightly. You can also use different extracts like almond, black walnut and others. You can also try using fruit like strawberries, peaches, pineapple. For juices you may add some carrot juice" (Blair). the key, however, was to consume them slowly, which I doubt many of us have ever tried.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Vince Gironda's Hormone Precursor Shake</u></b></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Vince recommended having three of these a day, so you can rest assured no one was going hungry on his diet. The first shake served as breakfast, then the other two were sipped on during lunch and in the evening.</span><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12oz half and half (milk consisting of light and heavy cream)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">12 raw eggs</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 scoops of protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 banana (for taste, can be omitted if strict low carb)</span></li>
</ul>
<br>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3LLwXEsq28aqlRtqHvo4Ldk1KalpoHCwW2nvrRtVTTitJdb1l9SBtqNjRXOjRvbc4T3uDIdv5mGpU99_VOyR6Fxk4tajdFkWH2J_JDXUKkdPa84aM2ORMuIKbCqNtqRfdNDpwYEo3X7AF/s1600/Hormone+Precursor+Shake.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="399" data-original-width="632" height="252" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3LLwXEsq28aqlRtqHvo4Ldk1KalpoHCwW2nvrRtVTTitJdb1l9SBtqNjRXOjRvbc4T3uDIdv5mGpU99_VOyR6Fxk4tajdFkWH2J_JDXUKkdPa84aM2ORMuIKbCqNtqRfdNDpwYEo3X7AF/s400/Hormone+Precursor+Shake.png" width="400"></span></a></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Bob Hoffman's Hi-Proteen Shake</span></u></b><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hoffman seems not to have given specific recommendations for his soy protein powder (Hi-Proteen), but he did make a list of "some of the foods that mix together well as a milk shake" (Hoffman 114). His protein apparently tasted like pureed, burnt dog assholes (and his later release of fish protein powder was apparently even worse) no matter which of five flavors you used, so I would guess that this recipe was as much to mask the horrific taste of soy as it was to provide nutrition. In any event, the US Olympic weightlifting team at the time served as his test subjects and as some of the biggest consumers of the stuff, and they were fucking beasts, so it must've had some positive effect. Because he failed to provide any portion control, I'm just kind of winging it with the recipe- the ingredients are his, but I filled in the blanks on the amounts. If anyone's got an actual full-blown recipe, hit me up.</span><br>
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 scoops protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 cups whole milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 cups skim milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 tbsp peanut or almond butter</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1/4 cup chocolate syrup</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 banana </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 whole egg</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 tbsp honey</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">(optional) quarter brick of chocolate ice cream</span></li>
</ul>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">McCallum's Get Big Drink</span></b></u><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">While Bob Hoffman was the 20th Century's predecessor of the modern day giant-behind-the-keyboard who populates electronic dumpster fires like 4Chan, believing he was far more capable and impressive than he was and telling everyone stories that might s well have been printed in cowshit on used toilet paper, he had nothing but the highest praise for John McCallum's "Get Big Drink." Hoffman included it in a hell of a lot of articles and recommended that all of his athletes at York use it, which is insanely high praise. </span><br>
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">6-8 scoops of protein </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 quarts of whole milk </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 cups of dry skim milk </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 eggs </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 tablespoons peanut butter </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Half a brick (.875 quarts or 462 grams) of chocolate ice cream </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 small banana </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 tablespoons malted milk powder </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">6 tablespoons of corn syrup</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">So there you have it- all of the nutritional WMDs a growing boy or girl could need to smash through plateaus and pack on mass like you're Christian Bale after <i>The Machinist</i>. If you decide to pass on these because you're afraid of getting fat, just know I'll be there to verbally bitch slap you when you come whining about how you're gonna reset to the bar because of butt wink and some other stupid bullshit and the internet supports your decision to remain weak but you want to send me form check videos anyway. Don't involve me in that bullshit- just stop being a fucking pussy, eat up, and move weights.</span><br>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Life's too short to be small, and it's <u>far</u> too short to be weak. </span></b><br>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">To that end, I'd be remiss if I didn't mention that <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/" target="_blank">Chaos and Pain</a>'s badass whey blend <a href="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-kraken-5lbs-whey-protein-blend/" target="https://www.chaosandpain.com/cannibal-kraken-5lbs-whey-protein-blend/">Cannibal Kraken</a> is now available in five sick-ass flavors (including shit like Pumpkinhead Latte and Honey Graham Reaper) and because I'd rather lose money than have to watch one more fucking form check video of some idiot squatting 135, <b>I'm hooking you up with 25% off your entire order at checkout if you use the promo code <span style="background-color: #f3f3f3;">Kraken25</span></b>. Snag some protein, bulk the fuck up, and smash weights. </span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="color: red;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And if you're curious why our blend includes both concentrate and isolate, there's a damn good reason- w</span><span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">hey isolate is lower in fat and carbohydrate and higher in protein than concentrate, which leads to a far cleaner nutrient profile and the impression that it's superior to concentrate, but whey concentrate is jammed with a variety of awesome things isolate lacks. For instance, whey concentrate contains much higher levels of IGF-1, TGF-1, and TGF-2, all of which aid aid in hypertrophy and strength, in addition to much more conjugated linoleic acid (CLA), immunoglobulins, and lactoferrin, leading to faster body recomposition.</span></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Catanzaro, John Paul. The protein pioneer: lessons from a Golden-age guru. Bodybuilding.com. 27 Aug 2013. Web. 30 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/the-protein-pioneer-lessons-from-a-golden-age-nutritional-guru.html">https://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/the-protein-pioneer-lessons-from-a-golden-age-nutritional-guru.html</a></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Gironda, Vince. How to use and prepare protein for muscle size. Reprinted from IronMan Magazine, 1976 Mar 35(3). IronGuru. Web. 2 Jul 2018. <a href="http://www.ironguru.com/how-to-use-and-prepare-protein-for-muscle-size">http://www.ironguru.com/how-to-use-and-prepare-protein-for-muscle-size</a></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hall DT, Fair JD. The pioneers of protein. Iron Game History. 2004 May/Jun 8(3):23-33.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hämäläinen E, Adlercreutz H, Puska P, Pietinen P. Diet and serum sex hormones in healthy men. J Steroid Biochem. 1984 Jan;20(1):459-64.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hoffman, Bob. <i>Better Nutrition</i>. York: Strength and Health Publishing Co., 1953.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McCallum, J. The high protein diet. 1997 Mar 4(4):86-90.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">McCallum, John. <i>Keys To Progress</i>. Nevada City: IronMind, 1993.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Poliquin, Charles. Weight gaining on a budget. Max Muscle. 21 Aug 2008. Web. 30 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.maxmuscle.com/article/2008/8/gaining-weight-on-a-budget.html">https://www.maxmuscle.com/article/2008/8/gaining-weight-on-a-budget.html</a></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rheo Blair Protein-How to mix the protein drink. Iron Guru. Web. 30 Jun 2018. <a href="http://www.ironguru.com/rheo-blair-protein-how-to-mix-the-protein-drink">http://www.ironguru.com/rheo-blair-protein-how-to-mix-the-protein-drink</a></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rheo H Blair's Protein Recipes. Iron Guru. Web.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> 30 Jun 2018. <a href="http://www.ironguru.com/rheo-h-blairs-protein-recipes">http://www.ironguru.com/rheo-h-blairs-protein-recipes</a></span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sallinen J, Pakarinen A, Ahtiainen J, Kraemer WJ, Volek JS, Häkkinen K.Relationship between diet and serum anabolic hormone responses to heavy-resistance exercise in men. Int J Sports Med. 2004 Nov;25(8):627-33.</span><br>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Venkatraman JT, Leddy J, Pendergast D. Dietary fats and immune status in athletes: clinical implications. Med Sci Sports Exerc. 2000 Jul;32(7 Suppl):S389-95.</span><br>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Wayne, Rick. <i>Muscle Wars: The Behind-the-Scenes Story of Competitive Bodybuilding</i>. New York: St. martin's Press, 1985.</span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com35tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-69009399486281767032018-06-21T16:53:00.000-04:002018-06-22T00:35:46.569-04:00Bud Jeffries- Epic Strongman, Peerless Powerlifter, Noble Savage. And A Goddamned Sexual Tyrannasaurus<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqTxpZXFRGkrfN2oH0jK7YqHr90wr72rbD7ME5g44UGD-AhmWdee0T5lSrSfifcjUwGSVEpUvlgEpRcVzh91xOcVFqriRQkaUln0FyHJuV02B7vDqqBOtER5ybk0ANmpAdtzeJvRKkyLck/s1600/35724617_2197779990262145_4050842939738292224_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="960" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqTxpZXFRGkrfN2oH0jK7YqHr90wr72rbD7ME5g44UGD-AhmWdee0T5lSrSfifcjUwGSVEpUvlgEpRcVzh91xOcVFqriRQkaUln0FyHJuV02B7vDqqBOtER5ybk0ANmpAdtzeJvRKkyLck/s640/35724617_2197779990262145_4050842939738292224_n.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Having regaled you guys with tales of semi-mythical lifters who rarely, if ever, competed, I thought it would be prudent to introduce you to the modern era's answer to Chuck Ahrens- Bud Jeffries. Six foot, 295lbs, and 44 years old, Bud is crazy strong, the possessor of the only 1,000lb bottom position Anderson squat of which I know, and has a penchant for setting things on fire and then attacking them with axes for no reason other than "I had some extra Fanta laying around and I don't drink it, so I lit it on fire and went bananas," Bud is what the Dos Equis man wished he was if he lifted weights rather than being a geriatric Hispanic man. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Without further adieu, Bud Jeffries.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Bud- to me you’re a legend, but tragically a lot of the new jacks out there have never heard of you. Mind giving us a bit of background on who you are? Let’s start with profession if you want to give it, sports you’ve participated in, and your competition history.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Thanks Jamie I appreciate that - Yeah I have two of the strangest professions anybody mixes together. I make a living as a professional old time strongman as well as a professional massage therapist. Historically it wasn’t that uncommon for the old time performing trainers to also work in areas that dealt with healing the body and the need for things which come from training like a psychopath. That fit my personality perfectly in that while I could be the guy who hurts you, I could also be the guy who helps heal you. I want to live as an absolute savage, but still kind of sane in that I help people as well. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In my personal case that fleshed out like this - I spent a year at the University of Florida playing football and ended up with a broken shoulder joint, which ended my career in that sport. I ended up coming home and was convinced to go to massage therapy school thinking it would be my new profession, but the truth was where I lived in the 90’s, it wasn’t possible to make a living in that profession. I had all the tools to make a ton of money as a massage therapist - had a good talent for it and all the touch skills, except I’m not a girl and I look like a Hell’s Angel, which tends to be a turn off for most people. However, I worked off and on as a therapist for the last 20 years and have been doing it full time for the past three years.. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Now simultaneously while the football injury/training as a massage therapist was taking place, I had the opportunity to do my first ever live strongman show, which kicked off the career as an old time strongman. While I was in Gainesville at U of F, I was going to a church and was recruited to do a strength show. They had a prison ministry coming in a few weeks with Anthony Clark who, at that time, was billed as one of the strongest men in the world and they wanted to do something leading up to the performance to build interest. The guy knew me well enough to know a bit about my life story which is a bit unusual. I had already been training as a competitive powerlifter since I was 13, had already won the Teenage National Championships and had already set state, regional and national records. This was back in the dark ages of pre-internet, I scrambled around and found some old editions of Powerlifitng USA with pictures of guys bending steel. I figured out some feats and for the performance did a few minutes talking about my life, powerfliting, bent and lifted some steel - that kind of thing. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That, however, gave me the idea that this could be cool to do and this might actually be my life’s purpose. So I started going around and speaking anywhere any one would let me - schools, churches, and that eventually developed into a career and I learned how to develop it into a show and do all the old time strongman feats. I’m a big believer that you ought to use what you have to inspire other people so I would tell them about my life. This would include the fact that I was technically still-born at birth, at the age of five I was hit and run over by a speeding van which fractured my skull and destroyed my hip spending months in a body cast, having to learn how to walk again. Then nearly died in another car accident at 17 from which no human being should have walked away. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It gave me a platform to talk to people about how no matter how difficult things are, you don’t give up, because I’m a guy who shouldn’t be walking, let alone someone who set powerlifting records and eventually squatted 1,000 pounds. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Along the way it eventually lead to about 16 years off and on of competitive powerlifting, capping off with a win at the WNPF LIfetime Drugfree Championship Worlds. Which I actually won with only three weeks training after I had quit powerlifting and gone on to competitive strongman. I came into the sport in the dark ages of strongman when it was first organizing in America, so I actually held the first strongman contests in Florida back when everybody who competed in anything looked at you like you had two heads when you flipped tires and lifted rocks. Then I kind of lost my mind and decided to fight for a while. I did MMA, toughman and grappling matches. I also competed in one of the coolest sports I’ve ever played in which is Highland Games for about two years. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As much as I love the competition stuff and I do think everyone ought to do some, I really got my strongest when I started training my own way and pursuing the old time strength feats and doing the really out-of-the-box stuff that addresses strength from the widest possible variety. Along the way I achieved some pretty cool things - I’ve written 8 different books on strength, produced over 60 DVDs on strength work, and performed over 1,000 anti-bullying assemblies in schools across America which was unbelievable. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Holy hell! I had no idea you were such a prolific author… or really any of that. I knew about your love of pin squats because I used your example (like the aforementioned Anthony Clarke with reverse grip bench press) to help explain my use of the same movement in my meet prep. It’s incredible that in spite of the fact you’re one of the most qualified strength coaches out there you’re not one of the first names on trainees’ lips when discussing training books and coaches. But why read something challenging and well-rounded when you can shell out a bunch of money for some slightly updated version of a thoroughly mediocre program someone else promoted twenty years ago?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Before I go off on a rant, how about you share your best lifts and/or pet lifts of which you’re most proud?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Man for me that’s a deep question, because I really feel like every lift is my pet lift and I’ve been on a course pursuing balance, accuracy, coordination tying in with strength. Over the course of my lifetime I want to record 1,000 different physical feats. That being said - here’s some of my best stuff:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Along the way I switched from powerlifting style squats to bottom position dead stop squats as my main squat style. I was on a quest for year, since I was about 15 years old, to squat 1000 lbs. It took me 16 years of training to hit that and I ended up doing it from the bottom position, or Anderson Style squat. You should probably know that I did that at a body weight of about 380, because that was my single-minded quest; to get as big and strong as possible and squat 1000 pounds. At that bodyweight I also did 900lbs for 3, 850lbs for 5, and 700lbs for 15. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">At that bodyweight I also carried a 1,350lb yoke for 10 feet and pulled a 1,000lb sled 50 feet. I also carried a 600lb stone 40 feet and backlifted 3,600lbs of steel plates. I did a one arm military press with a 150lb dumbbell. Most people will also probably know me for my partial lifts which is something else I’m particularly proud of. I did a quarter squat with 2,000lbs. I’m proud of the 1,000 bottom position squat and the 2,000lb quarter squat, because it makes me the only person to tie Paul Anderson in those particular lifts. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">After that I lost 100 pounds. Since then I’ve had various body weights from 270 to 295. In that bodyweight range I’ve bottom position squatted 810lbs, done a 1,000lb yoke for 50 feet, and one arm rows with 300lb dumbbells for five reps. The one-arm press in any variation is a pet lift of mine. I’ve done between 200 and 220lbs four different ways - with dumbbells, with stacked kettlebells, with a live human and with a stone. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In losing that 100lbs I also started doing psychotically high-rep workouts as sort of a strength cardio. Those became a pet training method for me as well. I’ve done one arm swings with a 70lb kettlebell for 2,000 reps in one hour. I did one arm swings with a 53lb kettlebell for 4,000 reps in two hours. 2,000 reps with a 40lb sledgehammer in about an hour and twenty minutes. Snatched a 55lb dumbbell one handed for 320 reps in 10 minutes. I snatched a 53lb kettlebell for 1,000 reps in one hour. One arm pressed a 53lb kettlebell for 1,000 reps in an hour. I swung a 10lb sledgehammer for 1,000 reps in 17 minutes. Punched a heavy bag wearing a 100lb weighted vest for 30 minutes. Carried a 300lb weighted vest/chain combination for one mile. Dragged a 150lb tire one mile. Pinch gripped one handed 2 - 45lb plates, 3 - 25lb plates and 5 -10lb plates. Did a one arm press while wearing a 100lb weighted vest and did a handstand pushup with a 100lb weighted vest on. Drove a nail through a board with my hand while holding a one arm handstand. Backlifted the front end of an unloaded semi-trailer for 10 reps. Backlifted the front end of a half-loaded citrus semi-trailer for two reps and then lately I’ve gotten into combination accuracy/strength things like juggling a kettlebell while using a throwing knife or whip. Hitting various targets in the air with axes and knives both while standing or hanging upside down and pretty much anything else crazy you can think of. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisnUl1LcXt-o07-wHh34Io42hfMO_Df8WfP__I0nr9tdDSsrer7qIWGSPIo782ueOrfbxPPLgfIHPjOaH3wg4_QPT5j-nXdKt39zhM12bjNHcqBKS4HVzPi5HKfELZhyphenhyphenzSUaZBkPrSKwJL/s1600/35774438_2197784486928362_8801800526938243072_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /><img border="0" data-original-height="260" data-original-width="260" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEisnUl1LcXt-o07-wHh34Io42hfMO_Df8WfP__I0nr9tdDSsrer7qIWGSPIo782ueOrfbxPPLgfIHPjOaH3wg4_QPT5j-nXdKt39zhM12bjNHcqBKS4HVzPi5HKfELZhyphenhyphenzSUaZBkPrSKwJL/s200/35774438_2197784486928362_8801800526938243072_n.jpg" width="200" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs-kcm_PSnic3X55NQQs-ZIFCeCFriSsf293Pc894CW-4GVeJJrAYELoeq0UN19UGrGyi-JLsTGwZMAlsOaxBUznpr6WDXDxjJAoeAtTucQI0Nb9HFfX6xI0517uKcc4DVVOZiumh-Y3uB/s1600/35686785_2197785813594896_5727827471810691072_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="260" data-original-width="260" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhs-kcm_PSnic3X55NQQs-ZIFCeCFriSsf293Pc894CW-4GVeJJrAYELoeq0UN19UGrGyi-JLsTGwZMAlsOaxBUznpr6WDXDxjJAoeAtTucQI0Nb9HFfX6xI0517uKcc4DVVOZiumh-Y3uB/s1600/35686785_2197785813594896_5727827471810691072_n.jpg" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: That’s just fucking crazy- high rep workouts like that are wild. They’re also a bizarre departure from your powerlifting work, which is both rare and incredibly impressive. Was the switch gradual from one training style to the next, or did you just jump right on in? In retrospect, how would you recommend someone else make that switch to a totally obverse method of training AND would you recommend that high rep system for fat loss again? I ask because Bruce Randall recommended heavy weights and low reps with high volume when he was asked what he’d do if he had to do it all over again.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Funny thing is I actually jumped into this style of training twice. Once with the just jump in, deep end of the pool style and the second was more gradual. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The first time was when I decided to fight and I started training with a bunch of MMA guys who were in my area. There was one guy, Diesel Berto who had an MMA school close to me. He came out of the Pancreas organization out of Japan, the same one as Ken Shamrock, at the same time. He had trained with Karl Gotch who was really the originator of that organization. For conditioning they did that Hindu style of 500 to 1,000 bodyweight squats as the base and then all kinds of different Hindu pushups, bridging and lots of other fighter conditioning. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I found out what most big, really strong guys find out when they go to an MMA gym. You’re pretty dangerous for about one-minute and then you’re almost as dangerous as a new-born kitten after that when fatigue sets in especially to a guy who knows how to hold you off. That holds true until you actually learn how to relax and breath and get into shape. At that time I basically just jumped in with the workouts and spent a lot of time praying for death from the soreness, because when you go from doing one to five barbell squats and move to doing 500 to 1,000 bodyweight squats, DOMS becomes your intimate enemy. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I lost a ton of weight doing that and training to fight. Then I decided to bulk back up and push to squatting 1,000lbs. After I did that, I hung around for a year or so at that bodyweight and decided from watching the heavy lifters and people I knew who were that big, that it was basically death to stay that large whether you’re muscular or not. So I cut 100lbs. That’s when I really got into super-high rep stuff as a lifetime form of cardio. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It attracted me, because I’m coming from a lifting background and am very numbers based, i.e., “x” amount of weight in “y” amount of time, fulfills my need to systematically gain strength in a movement more than jogging. It also reframed my reference in what strength really is. Meaning this: I incredibly respect competitive lifters, but I don’t just want to be strong after a 12-week peaking cycle in perfect meet conditions, after the perfect night’s sleep and the perfect breakfast, in a perfectly temperature controlled room, during the perfect phase of the moon and wearing the perfect signature kneesocks. I want to be strong when I’m tired, any day, any time, food or no food and which is stronger? To squat 800lbs or take a 40lb sledgehammer and swing it 1,000 times? Answer: They’re both strong and you should do both. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When I started again with the endurance work that time, I started with kettlebell swings which is probably the perfect movement to start this kind of training with, because its very simple as a movement and very whole-body in its muscular emphasis. Pavel Tsatsouline said to me, “You do push ups till your chest fatigues and you can’t move anymore, but when you do swings you pray for something to get tired so you can quit.” </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I saw some tiny girls doing psychotically high reps and I thought, “Why can’t I keep up with them? I could do that too.” So I started out with 100 reps and added reps here and there. I started cycling up and down and it began to be the same kind of accomplished feeling for me to hit 500 reps unbroken as it was for me to make a new max PR. I also found I became very good at all kinds of endurance by doing that. Then I began to expand to all kinds of different challenges to keep fresh and keep testing what I’m actually capable of and what’s possible. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In looking back about if I would do it again, I would actually do what I’m doing now. Which boils down to heavy lifting of different kinds of barbells and strongman stuff at a high intensity, but most of the time at a fairly low volume. While also using a very high volume of light weight strength endurance work and constantly rotating challenges of combined strength, endurance, balance, coordination and accuracy. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I love heavy lifting, but my observational opinion here is that most of your lifters who do a high volume of heavy sets end up with injury issues. I think you get a longer career out of small amounts of heavy lifting regularly focusing on a few basic lifts that are your core, which you go back to all the time. Mix that with a wide variety of heavy lifts that you simply experiment with as you go along. The combination of cardiovascular, muscular endurance and blood flow you get from the super high rep work makes for a much healthier, resilient body. For most people it will do the job for fat loss. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-R5EZIM2kR-rQOeS2Zxj-m2i_kThe3i7Y0HNZVA93TKG4F-CL01iIH2h9xf73GYjq6eKKsfKOtR0HFLdV6vyqp8rWs0gCPhgug2z57TCvlgorjrt0LOv8mawa2PwAB9GImEgSyzdaDWAt/s1600/35882500_2197783250261819_3952949858989506560_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="260" data-original-width="260" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj-R5EZIM2kR-rQOeS2Zxj-m2i_kThe3i7Y0HNZVA93TKG4F-CL01iIH2h9xf73GYjq6eKKsfKOtR0HFLdV6vyqp8rWs0gCPhgug2z57TCvlgorjrt0LOv8mawa2PwAB9GImEgSyzdaDWAt/s1600/35882500_2197783250261819_3952949858989506560_n.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Top three favorite books? </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Well do you mean strength books or just books period? Standard books: <i>The Education of a Wandering Man</i> by Louis L’Amour. Steven Pressfield’s <i>Gates of Fire - An Epic Novel of the Battle of Thermopylae</i>. <i>Spirits Rebellious</i> by Kahlil Gibran. Being as I’m also a minister, but the type of minister who absolutely believes in Jesus, but would bust a whiskey bottle over your head if needed - I need to mention both the <i>Bible</i> and the original Robert E Howard’s <i>Conan</i>. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Strength books - I like <i>Super Athletes</i> by David Webster, Many people will bag on it, but I truly did like Brooks Kubik’s <i>Dinosaur Training</i> because it really was an influential book when it came out. Arthur Saxon’s <i>Development of Physical Power</i> is a great read. I have to mention <i>The Spiritual Journey of Joseph L. Greenstein: The Mighty Atom</i> by Ed Spielman. It’s both a great life adventure and physical culture book. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihpT1UllCeTfQIbXIiKsIyO4YOCCi4zTQhWotlbYYBQvZx49C7w3JlDyhl8V_JVgX30we0Pc4UYRENF0NGK9ALPg4UvJECT2oJJsHw_yfuvFLUW4US4eab-yqauCNcWAcX9_mrjs_g__AR/s1600/35882654_2197870053586472_6533520369687461888_n.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="578" data-original-width="576" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihpT1UllCeTfQIbXIiKsIyO4YOCCi4zTQhWotlbYYBQvZx49C7w3JlDyhl8V_JVgX30we0Pc4UYRENF0NGK9ALPg4UvJECT2oJJsHw_yfuvFLUW4US4eab-yqauCNcWAcX9_mrjs_g__AR/s1600/35882654_2197870053586472_6533520369687461888_n.png" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: I was actually asking for books in general, but it’s good to get your favorite strength training books while we’re at it. What’s wild is our taste in books- I too highly recommend <i>Gates of Fire</i> and used it as a preworkout read for years! <i>Dinosaur Training</i> and <i>Super Athletes</i> are two favorites as well. Honestly, I cannot stand Louis L’Amour and your last two recommendations aren’t to my taste either, haha, but we definitely have a wild intersection of interests.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Personally, I think we’d be well suited to have a historian chronicle more feats of strength worldwide people can read for inspiration- lifters today are inundated with so much mediocrity on social media that it seems to have clipped their balls. Hardly anyone seems to lift with big brass balls and the kind of wild personalities that filled gyms in times past. I don’t know if a book like an updated version of Super Athletes mixed with the strength bits of <i>Manthropology</i> might help, but I doubt it would hurt. What do you think?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I think it would be great. Of course - I love heavy lifting and the wilder the better, hence my propensity for lighting my backyard on fire while scaring the neighbors as I run around in a kilt, lifting a boulder and drinking mead. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I agree - modern lifting is boring. I can’t for the life of me fathom people filming endless sets of the same crap with light weight. I get why Instagram famous girls do it. They don’t want you to look at the barbell, they want you to look at their butt. If there’s not an instructional meaning to what you’re filming, or a coolness factor or yes, I sweated blood to do this, or I’m attempting to unlock your mind as to what’s possible - then its a waste of time. There are people out there doing phenomenally awesome things, they’re just hard to find. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">We’ll have to do a whole other article on a strongman series where I tell you some of the crap I’ve seen guys do, because they’re committed to being interesting and doing amazing things. Like the first day I met Dennis Rogers and five minutes after I met him, sitting in a hotel room at 11:30 at night - I watched him rip a deck of bicycle cards into eighths at about 47 years of age. I watched 72 year old Slim Farman lever a pair of 25lb sledgehammers to the nose and back up when I got to perform with him at a Strongman Dinner.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Age and size don’t mean much. Heart, grip and passion mean everything.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7CP1VtYhL5LSq-zdNWBGuWgPFhMhgwe0L8dIaZIjtZiik3Ekhc-O9Z7-1duQt5_qwNhXIlfPfUkSFUPSlqNworJ7OmldmRGlYJYSsvARJKcxN8gGR0Ox6ezjYdn4p78MMXjRRswRwC5V_/s1600/56714_v9_ba.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7CP1VtYhL5LSq-zdNWBGuWgPFhMhgwe0L8dIaZIjtZiik3Ekhc-O9Z7-1duQt5_qwNhXIlfPfUkSFUPSlqNworJ7OmldmRGlYJYSsvARJKcxN8gGR0Ox6ezjYdn4p78MMXjRRswRwC5V_/s200/56714_v9_ba.jpg" width="150" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4VZ2N6cW096ImcN_-Kmkv9vBLK0qnV_G41OSSKGMunsCEOy2fEd0boWnHo-eHAQ3cXvIZtMFaLZM6lcgCUdIM8YLGKfoIop__oFQog9iyno9fHmOYuDVfX0f0f2SG8Uh6t8OAE6t5jVXc/s1600/56765_v9_ba.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1440" data-original-width="1080" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4VZ2N6cW096ImcN_-Kmkv9vBLK0qnV_G41OSSKGMunsCEOy2fEd0boWnHo-eHAQ3cXvIZtMFaLZM6lcgCUdIM8YLGKfoIop__oFQog9iyno9fHmOYuDVfX0f0f2SG8Uh6t8OAE6t5jVXc/s200/56765_v9_ba.jpg" width="150" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_D306mR3xQGHeL3LivYrt-ttikBQpjSGZEQWpjWQu4cp5IZfq9MSlSQnz5LiCyXQ1g0aOwo9mo7-SkOW_nYvechilRb1we47CTSDdOMtAJWt9_rmq7fvHCCvZ7FGdVftE3YchkiTK_HoG/s1600/Caitlyn-Jenner-in-Red-Sexy-Zac-Posen-Dress.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="935" data-original-width="700" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi_D306mR3xQGHeL3LivYrt-ttikBQpjSGZEQWpjWQu4cp5IZfq9MSlSQnz5LiCyXQ1g0aOwo9mo7-SkOW_nYvechilRb1we47CTSDdOMtAJWt9_rmq7fvHCCvZ7FGdVftE3YchkiTK_HoG/s200/Caitlyn-Jenner-in-Red-Sexy-Zac-Posen-Dress.jpg" width="149" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: I met the Hammerman years ago- very cool guy, but very lonely as I recall. Missed his wife a lot.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And I realize your wife is very much alive, but I’ve gotta ask you this FMK because it frankly has me running in circles and a fan of both of our stuff hit me with it. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Fuck/Marry/Kill: Roseanne, Caitlyn Jenner, and Rosie O’Donnell. </b> I realize the real answer is death would be preferable to any of it, but let’s see what you’ve got.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I don’t even know how to answer this - I had to ask my wife this one, because this was such a horrible labyrinth of evil that you laid out in this question. I’d have an easier time building a Hadron collider with materials from Home Depot and a Circle K. I originally said I’d fuck and marry Roseanne and kill the other two, but my wife said, “You’d have more to talk about long term with Caitlyn Jenner, so marry her, do Roseanne and kill Rosie. It just says you have to marry one, not marry and have sex.” </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This is awful. The bigger question here is how long do I have to live if I choose in this conundrum you’ve posed? More to the point, who is going to show up and try and make me do it?? </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Hahahahaha. I would venture to guess any amount of time would be too much, and frankly I would think whoever was enforcing that would have to arrive in a Ned Kelly-style armored suit. If it helps, I arrived at the precise conclusion of your wife.</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Alright, into the nitty gritty. There seems to be more people than ever in the gym these days, yet the vast majority of them seem to be spinning their wheels. What do you think the issue is with their lifts?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Well I think its multiple things. The truth is - most people have no idea how to work hard. Truly working hard and squeezing muscle out of yourself is a built skill. Form is an issue, but form is at least coachable with minimum effort for serviceable lifts. Granted not the kind of form garnered from 20 years of competitive lifting, but serviceable form for basic gains in lifting. Arguing about program and diet is really a waste of time because you can find programs and diets from people all around the world for the last 100 years who became big and strong. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I think the real issue comes down to desire to actually do what it takes. Very few people are actually going to tell you that it takes legitimate blood, sweat and tears to achieve the end result, because that doesn’t sell. Most people are doing what they think they’re supposed to be doing, not what they actually want to do. What I mean by that is that most guys are in the gym, because they think they’re supposed to be big and strong, but that’s not what their true heart desires. Most women are in the gym trying to lose weight, because they think that’s what they’re supposed to do, because they’re supposed to look a certain way. However, it's not what they want to do or actually look like. If you’re doing this because it's what you think you’re supposed to do, but not what you truly want, you’ll never put the effort in. Not for the long haul. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If you take nothing else away from this, know that serving but an orange Fanta could be fatal several times over.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: I completely agree, and would add that most people who are into lifting on social media don’t seem to enjoy it- they just want to be a part of the lifting community, which is both sad and annoying. Watching people go through these terrible programs like they’re punching a fucking timecard in a factory is depressing. As to the work capacity thing, I think that any lifter who didn’t wrestle in high school likely has no idea what the limits of human endurance are, both from a cardio and a muscular endurance standpoint. When I went to high school, practically everyone played at least one sport, and a lot of us played three a year- we were in shape year round and as we got older our work capacities grew to ridiculous levels. In college my best friend and I were running a SEAL ragged as he tried to work us into the ground for summer workouts. Any thoughts in that regard? What should people do to work that capacity?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I kind of answered that about what I do in regards to high repetition work now and what I would repeat, but I think they need to just get out and try stuff. Stop worrying that cardio and muscular endurance work is going to kill your gains, its actually going to make it go up. Stop thinking that you’re fragile and you need to get the perfect grams of protein and you need to use the perfect percentage in your routine. It doesn’t mean your workout will get off track and your cat will get hairballs and your neighborhood socioeconomics will degrade and other such catastrophes of evil will befall you. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Work capacity or cardio or whatever you want to call it, is how you build vitality. It's how you avoid becoming the guy who is 40 years old sitting on the couch, watching TV, boring his wife to death and doesn’t have the energy to turn off the TV and carry her to bed like a viking, or play with your kids or burn down the next town if they displease you. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It’s also how you live longer and have a lot more life in those years. Find some type of muscular cardio like sled dragging, or kettlebells or sledgehammers or punching a heavy bag. That lets you work hard regularly and makes the neighbors cry when they watch and doesn’t leave you feeling like death the next day. Systematically build it up. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When I wrote about swings I called it, ‘climbing a mountain.” I mean this - Take it to a place you didn’t think you could go. Work capacity training is the way anyone can do something amazing. It may or may not be in the genetic cards for you to have a big enough bone structure to squat 1000 pounds, but anybody with enough grit can lift a 50lb kettlebell 1,000 times with enough training. After workouts like that nothing else seems too daunting. Getting off the couch seems like the easiest thing in the world to actually live life instead of being too tired all the time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bud's Likes</b>: one arm handstands, being barefoot, and pastel skirts. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bud's Dislikes</b>: watermelons, and people's knees. Seriously, cover your knees up if you're gonna be walking around everywhere.</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: If you had to give a single piece of advice to a lifter, beginner or advanced, what would it be?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Learn to problem solve and do what fits you in the context of what you need to do. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That really applies to both beginners and advanced lifters, but you really won't have the confidence in your ability until you get more advanced. In the beginning you're learning from other people either by imitation or instruction and you're taking the things they say as advanced wisdom, but nothing you do in lifting is 100% true for everybody. Meaning this - whoever you learn from you're going to learn their style and they're going to tell you that their style is 100% correct. It may be for them, but it may not be for you. Whether anatomically, experientially or within your personal purposes, their way may not fit you perfectly and you have to have some courage and intelligence and ability to problem solve for yourself. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When I say within the context of what fits you and what you need to do, here's what I mean:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I just said there are no 100% truisms, except to say this – Everyone needs to squat one way or another. If you learn to squat from an Olympic lifter you’ll be told that narrow stance, ultra deep squats are the only way to do it. If you learn to squat with a group of multi-ply powerlifters you’ll probably be told that wide stance, moderately deep is the only legitimate way to do it. Truth is – it doesn’t matter. If you want big strong legs Olympic squats, regular power squats, box squats, bottom position squats, will all work. We all have reasons why we think our individual preference is the best and while I’ll do my dead level best to convince you that my way is right, you have to figure out the one that works for you. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">You may find that one way works perfectly for you and the others leave you injured. It may not be the way the original person who taught you to how squat does it. None of this is right or wrong, it’s about what works the best or you in the context you need it, while doing the least damage to your body. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Connected to that you’ll find what I’ve been talking to people about for several years now, which is: All training is reciprocally inhibitive. If you let one part get way out of whack and the other parts get weak, the weak parts will eventually hold back even your strongest training focus. For instance, I’ve seen guys who are 900lb squatters that even though their only focus is one rep sets, in competition their lack of endurance was holding them back. Meaning – they would have been a 1,000lb squatter if they could just breathe better. On the flip side, cardio monster Jiujitsu guys who weren’t very strong, it was the lack of strength that was holding them back. Or top end strength guys who are being held back by their lack of mobility and recovery. It’s what’s keeping them in pain and stopping them from advancing. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Along the path of a long career, and I’ve been training for 30 years now, you’ll find that your progress goes great and then stalls. The key to going to the next level of progress is problem solving. Thinking it through. Do you need to change exercises, or change the level of strength, endurance or athleticism or recovery in training? Or do you need to work harder and just suck it up? You have to have the guts to think and make the decisions for yourself and the confidence to act on them. In the beginning you should listen to someone who knows more than you, but after that, in the end, you have to think for yourself. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Ahhh- this is where the minimalism bullshit floating around the strength world has ruined many people. In their ridiculous attempts to train “optimally”, they’ve completely neglected movements for their lack of “carryover” and thus left massive gaps in their “armor” so to speak. To that end, do you think there are any movements currently not in vogue that most, if not all, lifters would benefit from including in the occasional workout?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Yeah, but I don’t think it's necessarily one specific move. I think we do a ton of linear work and very little that's non-linear. I think we spend a lot of extra time on movements that really aren’t paying a lot of extra dividends. For instance, the old school bodybuilding routines talked about multi-angular training, but most of what they were doing was a minor variation to the same muscular function. Not actually getting different angles. They’d tell you to do every type of squat and leg press in the gym to build strength from every angle, but the truth was squats did the deal and all you’re really doing is just beating the same horse from a quarter inch variation from where you were standing. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">What I think people ought to be doing is doing a basic movement and then rotating a different movement for short periods so that you’re basically filling all the gaps and finding a movement that truly moves you out of your box. This is going to sound silly, but it illustrates what I mean about non-linear movements. I regularly do some variation of very heavy one arm presses and one arm lateral raises. Those are my go to shoulder builders, but they are essentially straight line movements. This is a variation I throw in once in a while - I’ll occasionally take a dumbbell or sometimes a band, grab it with both hands and hold it out front like a front raise and write the alphabet in the air while holding the weight. In doing that you get a massive shoulder burn/pump whatever you want to call it, but you will cover every possible spot you could have held that implement in to the front of the body. You will have literally worked every possible angle to go in. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That’s actual multi-angular training, not doing 18 different variations of presses and 18 different variations of laterals. It's also moving a weight in non-straight line directions, which is a whole other type of strength. I often use isometrics in a very similar way in that I do them with weights and then I do them with weights in non-linear movements. I feel like that’s a great gap filler. Loaded caries are another great example of this coming from the strongman side. I’ve taken to doing a lot of what I called, “butterfly pulling a freight train style carries,” which I classify as a multi-angular loaded carry or drag. That might mean picking up two or even three objects and carrying or dragging them at the same time. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For instance - I put a log on one shoulder, picked up a farmers walk implement with my opposite hand and dragged a heavy tire fastened to a belt around my waist all at the same time. That stimulates things that you didn’t even know you had. </span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Jumping back to a previous topic, I’m fucking psyched to see that you promote the bottom position squat as your favorite, though i would classify it as “most effective” rather than favorite, because the pain that lift generates is otherworldly. Whenever I see a raw lifter fucking around with box squats, I suggest bottom position squats instead. Would you agree, and why or why not?</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I do agree that it is the most effective squat and possibly the most painful. I know that I personally experienced the greatest jumps in strength and ability to have the widest variety of function when I switched to that style of squat. I also think they definitely have the most reality in the way they train the muscles, because if you think about it, there’s just about nothing you do in an athletic sport or the real world where you rebound in a regular or even a box squat. Meaning this – if you explode off the line in a football game, or pick up a stone or carry things around the yard or pick up your girlfriend and throw her over your shoulder, you don’t drop down into a full low stance and rebound, you simply start from the low position you need from wherever you need to generate force. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When I got good at creating massive amounts of starting strength from the bottom, I got good at many other things very quickly. I also originally switched to this for a couple of reasons:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">First – I saw that Paul Anderson did them – that was good enough for me. Brooks Kubiks was talking about them and I decided to try them. At the time I tried them I was already an 800lb squatter, regular style, and found that 500-600lbs was super humbling the first day I tried them. They were so much harder, that tipped me off that this was the key to moving to super strength. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Second - At that moment in my life I was transitioning away from working at the gym to training on my own at home because of work schedules. This allowed me to do training with complete safety even if it was 2am in my yard. When you get past a certain weight, dumping a barbell if you’re going to train max strength out of a regular squat, box squat or any other kind of squat, gets very dicey. This way you either stand up with it or you don’t, but there’s no way to get trapped. Because of that you can literally work as hard as you can humanly make yourself and because you can control exactly where the pins are, you will use exactly the same range every time. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">About that time I also got into partial range work and progressive distance training. Those really worked hand in hand with bottom position squats. It helped formulate my opinions on top end strength and how to get to the absolute maximum you could possibly lift for a full range while achieving the most usable strength in the real world. Bottom position work coupled with partials is crucial for that. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">Q</span><span style="color: red;">: We’re both proponents of old school, odd lifting, and various wacky shit, though I have to say you have outdone me on the latter- somersaults holding a heavy dumbbell, accurate bullwhip strikes while snatching a kettlebell, hanging from a barbell and doing a sort of vertical one-armed dumbbell fly- you’re a fucking maniac. Frankly, I despise explaining why I do anything I do to anyone, because moving weight builds strength and enjoying what you’re doing will encourage you to do it more, which means you’ll lift more weight and gain more strength. That seems completely intuitive to me. What do you say to people who tell you “there’s no point to doing that” beyond telling them to go fuck themselves?</span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I’m right there with you on that about people telling me there’s no point to the things that I’m doing. While I am a maniac and I really care about having fun while I’m doing what I’m doing, I’m actually a much more well thought out person than the psycho most people think. If you come at me with an attitude of telling me what I’m doing wrong (, I won’t bother wasting a breath on you – well maybe a backhand, but not a breath. I do however almost always include an explanation in all the videos that I put out although I’m slightly convinced it’s useless, because it seems most people won’t even read a three sentence caption that explains why I’m doing what I’m doing. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I agree – everything I’m doing intuitively makes sense to me just as yours does to you, but most people don’t have the experience that you and I do and aren’t thinking through training, they’re simply copying what they’re seeing. Some people genuinely want to know why and I get that, because if I had a month’s training experience and saw someone doing the crazy stuff I do, I might think they’re insane as well. I also do it specifically to combat the voices who say we’re doing stupid stuff, because someone is going to influence those newbies and it might as well be someone with an open mind. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I realize that to most people what I do seems totally insane, but there are well thought out reasons for everything I do. The first two are always I’m having fun and I want to see if it’s possible to do, but even within the crazy stuff I’m always training some type of physical ability, its just out of the box from what most people are conditioned to train. Yes, hitting a target with a whip might not get you a bigger deadlift or get you more swole – but training coordination, timing, speed and building new neural pathways both physically and mentally is just as productive a thing to do as an extra set of deadlifts. There’s the thing most people don’t realize is that I have an extremely broad focus of physical ability not just strength. Also, I find lifters have a false sense of ability sometimes. Here’s what I mean – a guy thinks because he can lift 700-800 pounds he can do damn near anything. And yes – massive strength on big compound exercises makes you stronger than 99% of the world, but it doesn’t guarantee that you can actually do all the stuff you think you can unless you try it. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I try all these things, because I don’t want to be the big lumbering ox who’s very strong but can’t do other things. I want to know what I can actually do, because I tested it, not just assume I can do it because I happen to be strong. Plus, over the years I’ve conditioned my mind to expand what I try to do both in the realms of what I think is possible and seeing all the angles from a creativity standpoint. In other words – Once I get a reasonable ability in a physical endeavor then I’m going to start asking myself can I do it backward, can I do it with my non-dominant hand or upside down or blindfolded or what are all the particular ways to do this feat? </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Your body is a huge universe to explore in the possible things it can do. Train the basic stuff till you bleed out of the eyeballs – that’s how you get strong, but then start exploring all the other ways. Most people build a big body and get super strong, but then it’s like you built a monster truck and never take it out of the garage to play. If you never go outside of the gym and do crazy stuff, you’ll never know the potential and outrageous fun you can have in what you’ve built. Well I took mine outside to play.</span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Your suggestion that people be social rebels- do you really think most people are capable of that? It seems to me that most people lack the self confidence and requisite personality to do that.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: I’ve changed my mind on this quite a bit in the last little while. It’s sort of becoming a moot point to me. Many things in life have become moot points to me lately – I’m just going to act. If a volcano exploded does it really matter why it explodes? It's just something you deal with. Sometimes the philosophy of why things happen simply fades away. Meaning this – At one point I would have told you that everyone has the ability to do it, they’re just choosing not to. Maybe it's for the reasons you just illuminated – lack of personality, lack of courage. Whatever the reason may be, I believe every human is equipped with the ability to step outside their comfort zone and make bold choices, but most of us will simply never pull the trigger. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If I can encourage people to do even one small socially rebellious thing that gets them off the couch or makes them happy or makes their life better or makes them realize even a small part of their potential, then I’m going to keep doing what I do. However, living with the volume of your personality dialed all the way up is not for everyone. Most of us live like sheep even though we really could be lions, but even in a pride there are always one or two that are really the dominant, living the 100% fulfillment of their potential. The truth is sheep will always hate the lion for being the lion, because they fear it. If sheep could talk they would probably also tell the lion there’s no point to what it’s doing. I do however look for the people who make that little change or the ones capable of really being what they could be. That’s where doing this kind of work is important to me.</span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: Oh! One last question- how did your diet differ between the quest for the 1000lb bottom position squat and dropping weight with your ultra high rep shenanigans</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: At the time I was trying to squat 1000 pounds I was eating like an animal and trying to get big. I’ve never been one to try to eat a special way or diet in a way that’s measuring portions. I did try to restrict the carbs, and you have to remember that from age 14 to 30 I was on a quest to squat that 1000 pounds. I went through a bunch of evolutions of diet moving toward a healthier life. I was eating protein like a beast. One time a training partner and I sat down and ate 10 pounds of homemade chicken tenders after a training session. This same skinny partner and I once got kicked out of Sonny’s during an all-you-can-eat BBQ night. LOL</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">After that I really decided to experiment with eating as natural as possible. As few chemicals and processing as possible, farm fresh and homemade. I never got into pushing one macronutrient over the other. I would say I ate rather closely to the Warrior Diet in that I ate when I was hungry, not by the clock and I was heavily influenced by Bernard McFadden which centered on two meals a day. In fact today I still generally only eat one to two meals per day.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I do have to say here that my wife, Heather, was really the person who made sure that played out well. She is an incredible cook, in my opinion she could win America’s Master Chef competition if she entered. She has this thing about the ingredients being used each serving a function to deliver better health and nutrition to either rehabilitate or fuel the body according to what the person does physically. The majority of what I’m eating is clean food, fresh from the farm, cooked old-school and from scratch. No bags, boxes, mixes, seasoning packets, HFCs, preservatives, harmful chemicals, dyes, etc. No bleached white flours or white sugars. She’s pretty picky about types of oils and the source of dairy products used as well. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For me it's about trying to make sure that the food I eat will help to keep my body healthy and functioning well for as long as possible without supplements, protein powders or pharmaceutical intervention. I care more about function than I do if I fit the ideal body image. I know too many people who are in bad health because of diet practices, but look like they belong on the cover of magazines. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I referred to her for this question too. LOL I asked her, “What would you say the big difference is between when I was eating to squat 1000 pounds vs how I ate in dropping the weight or now?” </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">She said, “Well, Before, I made a stealth sweep of the house to make sure it was clear of other humans so no one was in danger while you feasted. It kind of looked like the raptor feeding scene from Jurassic Park where they lower the live bull in a sling into the enclosure - er I’m sorry, ‘dining area.’ No one get too close. Now… we can have guests over. You’re a kinder, gentler caveman and will share your free-range pterodactyl drumsticks.”</span></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Q: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA. That's awesome. Man, you absolutely brought it in this interview. Before we close, I have to share the following, with the woman’s name withheld to protect the embarrassed, because you have at least one groupie:</span></span><br />
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<li><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">“You're going to be chatting to Bud Jeffries? You lucky fuck! Dude is sexy as fuck.” </span></li>
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<li><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">“Love the way he moves. I wouldn't be able to talk to him; I'd just do a kind of pee dance and make a show of myself.”</span></li>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hahaha- you were pretty damn ripped for a while, but I’m not sure you knew you had groupies like that. Your wife is evidently a very lucky woman (and a hilarious one!).</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I really appreciate the fact you took the time to do this interview, and the fact that we are on two sides of at least one metaphysical coin yet have so many shared interests and opinions is a really interesting testament to what lifting can do for the right people. I’m not gonna hold your feet to the fire with a hundred more questions because we’d have to turn this into a Dan John style book at some point, so if you’ve got anything else you’d like to throw in here, hit me. Otherwise, just plug whatever you like!</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A: Dude - thanks, it's amazing and for all the differences we have the connections are incredible. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Regarding the groupie - that’s really funny! What’s more funny is that I have two books coming up in the near future. Another on strength which is entitled, Outlaw Strength, but the other is on sex, which is yet to be titled. And quite frankly I have been known to be a sexy nimble panther with a <a href="https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/brontide" target="_blank">brontide</a> roar. LOL</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I have all kinds of books and DVDs which can be found on <a href="http://anunconventionalife.com/">AnUnconventionaLife.com</a> and my social IMs are @budjeffries - But here’s the thing I really want to pump, because honestly the rest is great, but it doesn’t matter as much to me anymore as this:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I’m going to say something hard right now, not meaning to bring anyone down, but in the end you’ll be pumped! </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Noah was a legit badass and poised to possibly eclipse his dad in strength sports. At 6'2" 185lbs, he had done a 1500 pound hand and thigh type lift, one arm jerked 150 lb dumbbell, bent the Iron Mind red nail at 15 years old, what a two-time All-American Sporting Clays champion, could shoot an aspirin out of the air with either hand with a BB pistol any day of the week, youngest in lightest of a humans in history have bend the Goliath bar, lifted a 500 pound Rock, did ab wheel rollouts for 9 minutes non-stop and held a wall sit with a 200 pound log on his legs for 30 minutes continuous without coming out of position, among a variety of other crazy shit.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Most of you don’t know that last October our son, Noah, was killed in a motorcycle accident. Hopefully I’ve done some cool things in my life, but he is really the one you should have been interviewing in this article, because he was one legit, bad hombre. Strong, smart, fearless and an amazing human being. Heather and I were devastated. We are an extremely tight knit family. When the hardest things happen in your life you have a couple of choices:</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Quit and die</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Or stand up and do something about it.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">So we keep going on and to stand up in honor of his memory we created the Noah’s Army Foundation. It’s a 501c3 non-profit that we are using to do good things in his name in honor of the legacy he left. At this moment we’re paying for scholarships for first-responders. We have a music program for children in hospitals in the works, we’re developing programs to benefit senior citizens and veterans. We have much, much more in store. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">You can support Noah’s Army through our events or through purchasing his signature blend coffee, gear, or by simply making a donation all at <a href="http://noahsarmyfoundation.org/">NoahsArmyFoundation.org</a>. You can like and follow us on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/noahsarmyfoundation/" target="_blank">Facebook</a> and Instagram @NoahsArmyFoundation. Twitter is <a href="https://twitter.com/realnoahsarmy" target="_blank">@REALNoahsArmy</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">More important - register to become a blood donor and organ donor today. Noah elected to be an organ donor when he was 16 and first got his license. Even in this tragedy - he was able to punch death in the face and save four lives. It's a simple thing to do and regardless of what you believe it's the right thing. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">One of the things we promote and ask people to do besides that in joining Noah’s Army is to: </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Do something extraordinary. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Make your life count. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Do something you never believed possible. </b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>Live like there literally is no tomorrow. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>If you take nothing else from all I’ve said - Do that.</b></span><br />
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<span style="color: red; font-family: verdana, sans-serif;"><b>BTW- Bud and I will be doing a follow up interview on the Chaos and Pain Hatecast next month, so if you have follow-up questions, drop them in the comments.</b></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com32tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-25184024041158782452018-06-18T17:33:00.001-04:002018-07-14T16:44:45.538-04:00Science Is A Liar Sometimes... And This Is Why 'Science-Based' Natty 'Experts' Are The Strength World's ISIS And Should Die Screaming <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="text-align: left;">Stanislaus Zbyszko and his allegedly-impossible-for-a-natty-lifter 20.5" arms.</span> </div>
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<span style="font-size: large;">No matter what the future brings, man's capacity to rise to the occasion will remain unaltered. His potential for tenacity and optimism continues, as always, to outfight, outpoint, and outlive any and all changes by his society."</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
- Richard Matheson, "Steel"</div>
<br />
It will shock absolutely no one that I regard empirically-influenced training methods as worthless, but this is absolutely not the case. I don't consider training methodology based on clinical studies to be worthless- I think that the vast majority of the people promoting those methods are charlatans and liars (<a href="http://gregnuckols.com/2016/12/11/ffmi/" target="_blank">with one prominent exception being Greg Nuckols</a>), and their training methodologies are catastrophically detrimental to the strength training culture as a whole. The people who promote those theories- and yes, they are theories, not fact, and are heavily flawed theories at that- are at best delusional, and at worst literal enemies of the strength training state who should die screaming and choking on their own blood. They've sucked the heart and mind out of strength sports and replaced it with vapid adherence to milquetoast methods that produce dogshit results.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMQiiimqdBr18gT8r5DnOD5LiuV5JQi4yQUVFoQWsRjSWWYfIY3OvViKGhoFgojV2iBEPDDPrOxHM3F5DHkD72l-NRtRCZM4l0RTutEaDR0Rj5M_QWwN7Vb9F4QaJ3d0YNfNUvsXPDGOon/s1600/science-is-a-liar-sometimes-always-sunny-in-philadelphia-Mac-newton-galileo-13560876209.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="270" data-original-width="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhMQiiimqdBr18gT8r5DnOD5LiuV5JQi4yQUVFoQWsRjSWWYfIY3OvViKGhoFgojV2iBEPDDPrOxHM3F5DHkD72l-NRtRCZM4l0RTutEaDR0Rj5M_QWwN7Vb9F4QaJ3d0YNfNUvsXPDGOon/s1600/science-is-a-liar-sometimes-always-sunny-in-philadelphia-Mac-newton-galileo-13560876209.gif" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
"This... is Aristotle. Thought to be the smartest man on the planet. He believed that the Earth was the center of the universe, and everybody believed him, because he was so smart. Until another smartest guy came around, Galileo, and he disproved that theory, making Aristotle and everybody else on Earth look like a... bitch. 'Course, Galileo then thought comets were an optical illusion, and there was no way that the moon could cause the ocean's tides. Everybody believed that because he was so smart. He was also wrong, making him and everyone else on Earth look like a bitch again. And then, best of all... Sir Isaac Newton gets born, and blows everybody's nips off with his big brains. 'Course, he also thought he could turn metal into gold, and died eating mercury, making him yet another stupid... bitch!"</div>
<br />
My abject, virulent, and violent hatred for these pseudo-intellectual fuckwits will likely drive this article into a series, but as it stands, I am planning but one death stroke to their grotesque attempts to limit lifters and reduce them to the wildly pompous yet insanely unimpressive jitbags endlessly yammering about the supremacy of their methods online that they currently are. In death ground you fight, and this fight will be brutal, bloody, and easy. Anything you have read about your natural physical limit regarding muscle mass is not only a lie- it is a very specific and pointed effort to limit your growth by means of propaganda, though to what end I can only guess. Perhaps its to excuse their own shortcomings, but more likely it's to limit yours so they don't look so pathetic by comparison. Whatever their reasoning, they would disagree about as wholeheartedly with Matheson's sentiments as fifteen year old Redditors would with me about the utility and awesomeness of fetish porn in my articles.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmyA462LkIC_WkxVK1XL-1zoLQgkNGPOJUbyW2CBNR_HF5RHqaPXpXl1uotYQM6zpSZoihnv3v2CbdFmdL7DoonxWZwbi0RsWamgri2tPgNMnYiTF4OthxETC3qhsSf3qptnghIVmH8iz_/s1600/Teaching-Purity-to-Christian-Girls.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="900" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhmyA462LkIC_WkxVK1XL-1zoLQgkNGPOJUbyW2CBNR_HF5RHqaPXpXl1uotYQM6zpSZoihnv3v2CbdFmdL7DoonxWZwbi0RsWamgri2tPgNMnYiTF4OthxETC3qhsSf3qptnghIVmH8iz_/s320/Teaching-Purity-to-Christian-Girls.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
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We could all learn a thing or two from the morally superior and super-strong posters of Reddit. As such, there will be no porn in this post. Feel free to let Reddit know what you think of their opinions on the subject in the comments, or in r/weightroom over in that window to their parents' basements Reddit is.</div>
<br />
I am aware that few of you share this sentiment- surely the dissembling shitbirds I am about to destroy are held aloft as veritable saints in your eyes. Certainly, they don't curse or include porn in his articles. They are paragons of virtue who haven't sunk into the moral morass in which I dwell. As such, you believe that what they say must be more credible than my far better reasoned, well researched, and historically validated statements because mine are far too interesting, and theirs are stated in PG verbiage with the conviction of a saint speaking about Jesus the corpse god. And because "systems of mass faith can persist only if their followers have a strong need to believe in the authoritative promises and remain ignorant of contradictory facts," you must invalidate my convincing yet unconventional arguments because your imaginary universe would come crashing down were you to consider alternative viewpoints (Huesemann 154).<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Systems of mass faith are also strengthened by invoking the authority of their leaders.... The authority of the pope is derived directly from St. Peter, and this authority is passed down through the church hierarchy to cardinals, bishops and priests. In addition, for hundreds of years, the clergy conducted weekly masses in Latin, a language that was generally not understood by the public. This "language barrier" served as a tool for establishing authority and for keeping believers mystified, thereby limiting comprehension and avoiding critical analysis. Similarly, scientists often appear on the media to authoritatively communicate their findings and promises, largely in a language not understandable to the scientifically illiterate which, unfortunately, is most of the public" (Huesemann 153). </blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"'People have an overwhelming desire to believe in something,' and this is often exploited by those in power. <b>The average person today is probably as credulous as the average person in the Middle Ages</b>. As Neil Postman writes, referring to comments made earlier by Georger Bernard Shaw, 'In the Middle Ages, people believed in the authority of their religion, no matter what. Today, we believe in the authority of our science, no matter what.' <b>Such a high degree of gullibility is generally associated with an unwillingness or inability to be informed about all of the relevant acts in support of or in opposition to the particular belief system</b>" [Emphasis mine] (Huesemann 154).</blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggoCq3RH1LB77TbBe2rZfALtEIPJCaaYFanIejXKJbl1WRCpHW_BzATlfkDDtzoTfd57uNu0E8OBNp2zGf8i0EpceURHL4EUi_rg0BqrOnf_weN-7uaQInUo3lPWDCWR6OHmbk2_cU335o/s1600/images.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEggoCq3RH1LB77TbBe2rZfALtEIPJCaaYFanIejXKJbl1WRCpHW_BzATlfkDDtzoTfd57uNu0E8OBNp2zGf8i0EpceURHL4EUi_rg0BqrOnf_weN-7uaQInUo3lPWDCWR6OHmbk2_cU335o/s1600/images.jpeg" /></a></div>
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<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><b>In other words- don't be ashamed for buying into the bullshit. Just wake the fuck up and pay attention to the facts that are about to be presented.</b></span></div>
<br />
Before I launch headlong into the evisceration of the bullshit "science" behind the dripping pussydom of the "natty or not" shitbirds, "evidence based training" fuckwits, and basically every other pompous fucking know-nothing on the Internet, allow me to forestall the inevitable "those body fat percentages are vastly overestimated/wrong/bullshit/whatever the fuck Redditors love to say", take a big step back and literally fuck your own face if you've plans to start that shit.<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Body composition assessments vary in precision and in the target tissue of interest. The most common assessments are anthropometric and include weight, stature, abdominal circumference, and skinfold measurements. More complex methods include bioelectrical impedance, dual-energy X-ray absorptiometry, body density, and total body water estimates. There is no single universally recommended method for body composition assessment in the obese, but each modality has benefits and drawbacks" (Duren).</blockquote>
<div>
To put it in layman's terms for the less than astute, that means that for insanely muscular people, there is no single reliable test of bodyfat unless you're a corpse. If you doubt me, feel free to read that study- it's in the "Sources" at the bottom of the page.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI1ajBhGbBMWJhg_i5-xOxLCyZiBKyeuMG6GAE65baAayr3ZnZgvKjrFpaH5Zfm5fHA9xmgTRoEymt0KyTBt-0KheHCAjIL-h5Ybvha_fg060WGPaqkPn6FAgm0TrZFQsZ-3e3NMzC9iHD/s1600/leroy-colbert-seated-curls.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="500" data-original-width="396" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiI1ajBhGbBMWJhg_i5-xOxLCyZiBKyeuMG6GAE65baAayr3ZnZgvKjrFpaH5Zfm5fHA9xmgTRoEymt0KyTBt-0KheHCAjIL-h5Ybvha_fg060WGPaqkPn6FAgm0TrZFQsZ-3e3NMzC9iHD/s1600/leroy-colbert-seated-curls.jpeg" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Leroy Colbert, rocking "impossible" 21" arms and an FFMI (fat free mass index) of 28.63.</div>
<br />
If you google genetic limits for a natural lifter, you would immediately be confronted with a great deal of discussion over the FFMI of various lifters, using it to confirm or deny the "natty" status of various bodybuilders. The FFMI is a scientific method used to support the unequivocally pseudoscientific chart by which lifters are determined to be steroid users or not.<br />
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Let me state that unequivocally- any person using this chart is a fucking liar, a charlatan, a thief, and a loser. They should be stripped of whatever academic credentials they possess, have the shit kicked out of them, and should be left to roam the streets destitute and crippled. Just as <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2009/02/im-hardgaining-ectomorph-and-stuart.html" target="_blank">somatotyping</a>, phrenology, and psychoanalysis are all examples of blatant and unrepentant pseudoscience, so is the use of FFMI to determine whether or not a lifter is natural. I'd posit that due to the fact that these fuckers are charging people for advice that by virtue of the fact they've used this chart are wholly unqualified to give, they should be sued by anyone they've charged into lifelong poverty.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi_A9H_pG0HT_ozDNJCIRqDhGbJAP1UriFkxM4Ch5R-iy28uByWM3gDuyry3VoVP1iY5TPyU1tGOzcMlC-x_Eo5iYzWYSGTdWi0R7D8Thdln4ebYdW77Fspa3N4Bu1a1NRkv6_Fgm9YRIq/s1600/fc1905750d1963abad8c0fe2af37b30f-bruno-sammartino-classic.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="728" data-original-width="526" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhi_A9H_pG0HT_ozDNJCIRqDhGbJAP1UriFkxM4Ch5R-iy28uByWM3gDuyry3VoVP1iY5TPyU1tGOzcMlC-x_Eo5iYzWYSGTdWi0R7D8Thdln4ebYdW77Fspa3N4Bu1a1NRkv6_Fgm9YRIq/s640/fc1905750d1963abad8c0fe2af37b30f-bruno-sammartino-classic.jpg" width="462" /></a></div>
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Bruno Sammartino, a man who rocked a 32.39 FFMI, 20" arms, and a 565 competition bench, all natty as fuck.</div>
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The manner in which the FFMI is calculated is explained <a href="https://www.thecalculator.co/health/Fat-Free-Mass-Index-(FFMI)-Calculator-794.html" target="_blank">all over the place</a> and I've no issue with the math. It is the interpretation with which I have a problem, and it's explained with this little chart:<br />
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<span style="font-size: large;"><b><u>FFMI Interpretation</u></b></span><br />
18 – 19 = Average<br />
20 – 21 = Above average<br />
22 = Excellent<br />
23 – 25 = Superior<br />
26 – 27 = Considered suspicious but still attainable naturally<br />
28 – 30 = Highly unlikely to be obtained naturally without steroid usage.<br />
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According to empirically based lifter and coach, Greg Nuckols, with whom I disagree on just about every conceivable topic and whom I'm lambasted for destroying the culture around lifting with the promotion of extremely dull training methods, this chart interpretation is based on a single, extremely flawed study from the 1990's. That study concluded that 25 was the normalized limit for FFMI in natty bros, and although various natty coaches have raised the bar slightly, they still begin their shit talking at or around an FFMI of 28 (Kouri).<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRn3HQ5XWOtIXvOk-GRAK75JWB0Mj4WzNZgm8BH3IvJksSQDvYazW5egGabqe_uJi3rtBZKu3Ayq_rNrV1SFyNMp7jp6OcXQ7T3j6WLFHAq8ThLNEhoILxSX5nkKy9U2SG-GPWFCEODeZo/s1600/chuck+sipes+lumberjack.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="713" data-original-width="833" height="547" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhRn3HQ5XWOtIXvOk-GRAK75JWB0Mj4WzNZgm8BH3IvJksSQDvYazW5egGabqe_uJi3rtBZKu3Ayq_rNrV1SFyNMp7jp6OcXQ7T3j6WLFHAq8ThLNEhoILxSX5nkKy9U2SG-GPWFCEODeZo/s640/chuck+sipes+lumberjack.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
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Chuck Sipes, rocking a 570lb bench and natty as fuck 19.5" arms (cold measurement) in stark defiance of "science."</div>
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Like with all of the "evidence based" bullshit out there, the incredibly lazy, Anglo-centric, and close minded motherfuckers conducting their surveys of what is possible for natural trainees to achieve ignored literally the entirety of human history outside of an incredibly small sample of individuals who won a single bodybuilding contest in the early 1900's. This ignores the Indians, who have the longest running history of weight training in the world and who have produced some of the strongest humans outside of the modern era, the strongmen of the early 1900's, sumo wrestlers, and ACTUAL FUCKING SCIENTISTS. I don't give a fuck who's "scientific model" you might be using, be it that shit-talking autist Lyle McDonald or Marc "I appear to have cancer" Perry- they're all based on lies, bullshit, and ignorance of physical culture history, world history, and Pubmed.<br />
<br />
To wit, here is some historical evidence:<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB4XJL3yge03yEib4LY13AgtYVWCmiIANZOhXB12-G6qBx1hk1PAFRTVIVwsM_pv4jep6S5IgPBO0oyeyzZC3COVze7w0STLZIZtgm_s9P6SD-jr3FeL0jVNyYHHKkIxrS_Q4JA2dm4oC3/s1600/8746411c488c1b75714038e24b802652--sumo-wrestler-physical-fitness.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="672" data-original-width="600" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjB4XJL3yge03yEib4LY13AgtYVWCmiIANZOhXB12-G6qBx1hk1PAFRTVIVwsM_pv4jep6S5IgPBO0oyeyzZC3COVze7w0STLZIZtgm_s9P6SD-jr3FeL0jVNyYHHKkIxrS_Q4JA2dm4oC3/s1600/8746411c488c1b75714038e24b802652--sumo-wrestler-physical-fitness.jpg" /></a></div>
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One of the greatest Yokuzuna, and certainly the most muscular of all time- Chiyonofuji Mitsugu.</div>
<b><u><br /></u></b>
Sumo is practically a religious event in Japan, and its traditions are deeply rooted in Shinto. As such, steroid use is literal heresy and a violation of an honor code so strict it makes WADA seem like a pack of disinterested chemists rather than the psychotic Warhammer 40k style inquisitors and commissars they really are. As such, we can take it as a virtual certainty that the Yokozuna are natty, and their FFMI are off the fucking charts.<br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLJVdKN47Yj0e1KfvSX1mwETx_q5e-yE0zjNmcmWaY7y-txp_8Ay1e4tc-A4UD3Og2nNgqUZ17Sj1ZW7aw_uHJtkjc35-x3A6b9woeEs0ePuO0l8daIKMXWmW4r0D2xkO1mCIyCPWu6dDv/s1600/cd805fa5374c4455805a7418ab3fad3f.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1333" data-original-width="1001" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLJVdKN47Yj0e1KfvSX1mwETx_q5e-yE0zjNmcmWaY7y-txp_8Ay1e4tc-A4UD3Og2nNgqUZ17Sj1ZW7aw_uHJtkjc35-x3A6b9woeEs0ePuO0l8daIKMXWmW4r0D2xkO1mCIyCPWu6dDv/s400/cd805fa5374c4455805a7418ab3fad3f.jpg" width="300" /></a></div>
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If WADA's Inquisitors looked like Inquisitor Lilith, I might compete in the IPF... just for the whipping.</div>
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And before Reddit starts screeching bullshit about the bodyfat percentages, everyone should take note- the mean bodyfat percentages in one study was 26.1% (Kondo) and another source stated that among "the top sumo wrestlers the average BMI is 36.5 and the body fat percentage is 30%. Also, the sumo association issues a warning to wrestlers who have tested over 38 percent body fat. If they go above 38 percent body fat they are forced to lose weight or risk suspension (Neporent 107-108). The reason they look so fat is their fat distribution- whereas most people have 77% of their fat stored viscerally (around the internal organs) and only 23% subcutaneously, sumo are the exact opposite- visceral fat is only 25% of their bodyfat and the rest is subcutaneous. The reason for this fat distribution is partially genetic and partially diet and exercise, but in the end the effect is that sumo "wrestlers lay down subcutaneous fat that doesn’t inhibit muscle development and which can be more easily accessed for energy use" (Hooper). Researchers credit this to the fact that sumo are heavily active and eat very little sugar, whereas Westerners are just a bunch of candy-grubbing slobs with malfunctioning endocrine systems (Matsuzawa).<br />
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Still think they're all fat? Ulambayar Byambajav slamming the fuck out of a 420lb opponent.</div>
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That said, here are some prominent Yokozuna, their stats, their body fat percentage or an estimate, and their FFMIs:<br />
<b>Ulambayar Byambajav</b>- 6'1" 365lbs. 15% BF (reported): <b>FFMI- 41.02 </b><br />
<b>Chiyonofuji Mitsugu</b>- 6' 260-280lbs. BF 11%. <b>FFMI- 31.45</b><br />
<b>Kitanoumi Toshimitsu</b>- 5′10″ 373lbs. Est fat 35%. <b>FFMI- 34.86</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWgxnTx5lCU80crPBsT8DVzDFjSd_oSMtNqODbX3dFV3Hs65Np5pk-VeOVzsRSiOxQIqnph8p9MkK6Sn0He2BKughskJJHEN76xmwUPpcxojTsVGJ6cSE_g-Aig_hVQ1088W4lFVb8QICd/s1600/img-20180313-wa0000.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="799" data-original-width="720" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWgxnTx5lCU80crPBsT8DVzDFjSd_oSMtNqODbX3dFV3Hs65Np5pk-VeOVzsRSiOxQIqnph8p9MkK6Sn0He2BKughskJJHEN76xmwUPpcxojTsVGJ6cSE_g-Aig_hVQ1088W4lFVb8QICd/s320/img-20180313-wa0000.jpg" width="288" /></a></div>
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As I've written in the past, India <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2012/09/its-time-to-stop-mocking-indians-for.html" target="_blank">has the longest history of strength training in the world</a>. I realize that would shock the aforementioned autist and his fellow idiots, but it's a fact. As such, the Indians have a codified system of training that persists even today and has produced some of the greatest wrestlers (pehlwani) to walk the Earth.<br />
<br />
Here are a couple of the greats:<br />
<br />
<b>Jatindra "Gobar" Charan Goho</b>- 6'1" 290lbs. Est 20%. <b>FFMI- 30.67</b><br />
<b>Dara Singh</b>- 6'2" 280lbs. Est 15%. <b>FFMI- 30.62</b> Est 18% <b>FFMI- 29.54</b><br />
<b>Great Gama</b>- 5'7" 250lbs. Est 20%. <b>FFMI- 31.39</b> Est 25% <b>FFMI- 29.43</b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW-X0w6dV8If00op7he8kVwilM3-_vXwbMjKS6vsc-NUaT3z6DHJh11lSmDIYzl1L-btJAnQwG-vPNNs2x_2CNmDTJBjJaPjEIUkJI159KL2yagvacSUN1RfVBrzXu28CWPCJsm3cxbejA/s1600/maxresdefault+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjW-X0w6dV8If00op7he8kVwilM3-_vXwbMjKS6vsc-NUaT3z6DHJh11lSmDIYzl1L-btJAnQwG-vPNNs2x_2CNmDTJBjJaPjEIUkJI159KL2yagvacSUN1RfVBrzXu28CWPCJsm3cxbejA/s400/maxresdefault+%25281%2529.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
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The West hasn't simply churned out bodybuilders- we've got our fair share of beasts to match the Asians. Here are a few of our monstrous natty bros:<br />
<br />
<b>Louis Cyr</b>- 5'8.5" 291lbs. Est 30% <b>FFMI- 30.59</b><br />
<b>George Hackenschmidt</b>- 5'9 218lbs. Est 12% <b>FFMI- 28.39</b><br />
<b>Stanislaus Zbyszko</b>- 5'8" 230lbs. Est 18% <b>FFMI- 28.74</b><br />
<b>Chuck Sipes</b>- 5'9.5" 220lbs. Est 8% <b>FFMI 29.52</b><br />
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Oh, and as for the bullshit limits on the measurements of natty bros?<br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"Looking at the stats of these 3 legendary naturals, several important points stand out. The first thing we notice is that even with slightly higher body fat percentages than modern natural bodybuilders, these champions could not push beyond the 18 inch arm barrier. The second thing we notice is that 25 inch quads were a championship-level norm" (Shaw).</blockquote>
Fucking nonsense. Cyr's arms were 20-21.5", Hack's were 19" cold. Sipes' were 19.5" cold, and Zybszko's were 20.5". Your guess is as good as mine as to why these pussies are setting your natural limits so insanely low, but one thing is for certain- it's absolutely not science. Know why? Because science says this:<br />
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If limitations exist in skeletal dimensions, fat-free mass (FFM) might have an upper limit. To explore the upper limit to FFM, 37 professional Japanese Sumo wrestlers, 14 highly trained bodybuilders, and 26 untrained men were investigated for body composition (fat mass and FFM) and cross-sectional areas (CSA) of limb muscles, by hydrodensitometry and ultrasound, respectively. Mean % fat of Sumo wrestlers, bodybuilders, and untrained subjects were, respectively, 26.1%, 10.9%, and 12.1%. Sumo wrestlers had a significantly greater FFM than bodybuilders, who had a greater FFM than the untrained men. Six of the wrestlers had more than 100 kg of FFM, including the largest one of 121.3 kg (stature: 186 cm, mass: 181 kg, %fat: 33.0%). The FFM/stature ratio of elite Sumo wrestlers averaged at 0.61 kg/cm, with the highest 0.66 kg/cm. <b>It is suggested that a FFM/stature ratio of 0.7 kg/cm may be an upper limit in humans</b> (Kondo).</blockquote>
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This means Flex Lewis is a long way off from his natty genetic limit.</div>
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To clarify, that means that <u><b>at 5'5', my natural limit for fat free mass is 254lbs</b></u>. Put that in your fucking pipe and smoke it, natty fuckers. And if you didn't like that study because it involved too many non-Americans, how about this less exciting result?<br />
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"SM [skeletal mass] index may be a valuable indicator for determining skeletal muscle mass in athletes. A SM index of approximately 17 kg/m2 may serve as the potential upper limit in humans (Abe).</blockquote>
There is no perfect method of which I know to reconcile exactly skeletal mass and fat free mass, but the largest athlete in the study was listed as having 59.3kg SM and 120.2kg FFM. <b>As such, my maximum SM (17kg*1.68^2) of 47.98kg (105.6lbs) SM would correspond to around 97.25kg FFM (214lbs)</b>. So where the pink bitch pickpockets masquerading as experts on your natural limits had my limit at 135lbs (an amount of lean mass that I exceeded as a junior in college with very little in the way of supplementation), scientists say my limit is between 80 and 120lbs more than that.<br />
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22 year old Christian Wilkins- 310lbs, 4.80 in the 40-yard dash, can bench press 225 pounds for 31 reps, and can broad jump 9 feet.</div>
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Compounding that, a small study done in 2017 on collegiate football players showed their highest recorded drug-tested FFMI reading as 31.7, which indicates that it is possible to hit such an FFMI while still under the legal age to drink in the US. Given that male strength athletes seem to peak in their late 30s to early 40s, that leaves a tremendous amount of time during which that FFMI could be pushed far higher. In short- the charts you know and love are complete and utter horseshit, the people bandying them about are a fucking joke, and if you run into one of them in public, spitting on them or shitting in their cereal would be completely appropriate.<br />
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"And what are the achievements of your fragile Imperium? It is a corpse rotting slowly from within while maggots writhe in its belly. <b>It was built with the toil of heroes and giants, and now it is inhabited by frightened weaklings to whom the glories of those times are half-forgotten legends.</b> I have forgotten nothing and my wisdom has expanded far beyond mere mortal frailties."</div>
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By now, you should be convinced that the natty limits drilled into your heads are pure bullshit, and setting a limit on your growth is counter-productive in any event. With any luck, you will have been inspired by this to crack open your fridge and start emptying its contents into your stomach for the gains. When you do, bear in mind the following:<br />
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li>You will gain mostly muscle on a dirty bulk if you are lean and have been for some time, whereas the fatties will gain mostly fat. "In experiments of at least 3-weeks' duration, the weight gain of people with low bodyfat people comprises 60-70% lean tissues, whereas in the obese it is 30-40%" (Forbes). Thus, it'd stand to reason to get lean and stay that way for a while before you dirty bulk like a motherfucker.</li>
<li>People who are naturally predisposed to endurance events will have a harder time gaining muscle than people naturally predisposed to strength and size, though the latter will gain more fat as well (Schuler).</li>
<li>Sumo wrestlers train twice a day, six days a week. Drop that stupid fucking Smolov bullshit and actually challenge yourself while you're bulking. Also, it might be useful when bulking to eat huge meals twice or there times a day- sumo only eat twice a day.</li>
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So there you have it- not only are the natural genetic limits to muscular growth insignificant for discussion anywhere, let alone a pack of fucking know-nothings on the Internet, the people propagating that bullshit should be drug out into the street and shot, and your genetic limit is so goddamned high that discussion on it is utterly pointless. Therefore, a pox upon the children of the science-tastic shitbirds of the lifting world (with concessions to Nuckols for being sensible if hyper-conservative and promoting lifting a Soviet factory work rather than a good fucking time), and three cheers for our muscular futures- <b>we've got a fuckload of eating and growing to do</b>.<br />
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HAHAHAHA. I couldn't help myself with the porn.</div>
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<b>Sources:</b><br />
Abe T, Buckner SL, Dankel SJ, Jessee MB, Mattocks KT, Mouser JG, Loenneke JP. Skeletal muscle mass in human athletes: What is the upper limit? Am J Hum Biol. 2018 May;30(3):e23102.<br />
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Duren DL, Sherwood RJ, Czerwinski SA, Lee M, Choh AC, Siervogel RM, Cameron Chumlea W. Body composition methods: comparisons and interpretation. J Diabetes Sci Technol. 2008 Nov;2(6):1139-46.<br />
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Forbes GB. Body fat content influences the body composition response to nutrition and exercise. Ann N Y Acad Sci. 2000 May;904:359-65.<br />
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Hooper, Rowan. The gene that may benefit sumo giants. The Japan Times. 20 Aug 2016. <a href="https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2016/08/20/national/science-health/gene-may-benefit-sumo-giants/">https://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2016/08/20/national/science-health/gene-may-benefit-sumo-giants/</a><br />
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Huesemann, Michael and Joyce Huesemann. <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Techno-Fix-Technology-Wont-Save-Environment/dp/0865717044" target="_blank">Techno-Fix: Why Technology Won't Save Us or the Environment</a></i>. Gabriola Island: New Society Publishers, 2011.<br />
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Kondo M, Abe T, Ikegawa S, Kawakami Y, Fukunaga T. Upper limit of fat-free mass in humans: A study on Japanese Sumo wrestlers. Am J Hum Biol. 1994;6(5):613-618.<br />
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Kouri EM, Pope HG Jr, Katz DL, Oliva P. Fat-free mass index in users and nonusers of anabolic-androgenic steroids. Clin J Sport Med. 1995 Oct;5(4):223-8.<br />
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Kucharski, Adam. Patterns and proofs. The Conversation. 19 Aug 2013.<br />
Web. 17 Jun 2018. <a href="http://theconversation.com/keep-it-simple-stupid-maths-doesnt-have-to-be-complex-16909">http://theconversation.com/keep-it-simple-stupid-maths-doesnt-have-to-be-complex-16909</a><br />
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Matsuzawa Y, Shimomura I, Nakamura T, Keno Y, Kotani K, Tokunaga K. Pathophysiology and pathogenesis of visceral fat obesity. Obes Res. 1995 Sep;3 Suppl 2:187S-194S.<br />
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Neporent, Liz and Suzanne Schlosberg. <i><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Fat-Free-Truth-Answers-Weight-Loss-Questions/dp/B005Q6V4O4" target="_blank">The Fat-Free Truth</a></i>. Boston: Houghton Mifflin Company, 2005.<br />
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Schuler, Lou. What's the most muscle you can gain? Men's Health. 7 Nov 2015. Web. 12 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.menshealth.com/fitness/a19515623/how-much-muscle-can-you-gain/">https://www.menshealth.com/fitness/a19515623/how-much-muscle-can-you-gain/</a><br />
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Shaw, Steve. Natural muscle building: a look at potential, genetics, and arm size. Muscle and Strength. 23 Oct 2013. Web. 15 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.muscleandstrength.com/expert-guides/bodybuilding-genetics">https://www.muscleandstrength.com/expert-guides/bodybuilding-genetics</a><br />
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Tara, Sylvia. Yes, sumo wrestlers are obese- but are they unhealthy? Medium. 30 Sep 2016. Web. 15 Jun 2018. <a href="https://medium.com/@SylviaTaraPhD/by-any-standard-the-sumo-wrestler-would-be-considered-obese-596defe012a9">https://medium.com/@SylviaTaraPhD/by-any-standard-the-sumo-wrestler-would-be-considered-obese-596defe012a9</a><br />
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Trexler ET, Smith-Ryan AE, Blue MNM, Schumacher RM, Mayhew JL, Mann JB, Ivey PA, Hirsch KR, Mock MG. Fat-Free Mass Index in NCAA Division I and II Collegiate American Football Players. J Strength Cond Res. 2017 Oct;31(10):2719-2727.</div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com39tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-14847315816996962862018-06-09T12:35:00.001-04:002018-06-10T12:49:54.113-04:00[Full Fucking Redux] Baddest Motherfuckers Ever- Chuck "Wrath Of The Natty Axe Giant" Sipes<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="color: red;">[This is a complete rewrite of my ancient Chuck Sipes article- the guy was such a fucking beast he deserves a<i> </i>fittingly brutal treatment, and given my penchant for writing about the lifters of the 1950s and 1960s of late, it seemed fitting to just blow away the old article and erect a massive monument to Sipes in its place.</span><span style="color: red;">]</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Over the last couple of articles I have joked about the near-mythical status of the badasses of the 1950s and 1960s, all of whom made insanely heavy lifts commonplace by taking every single modern truism about lifting, dumping it in the fucking trash, and deciding that the solution to every problem in the weight room is more food and harder training. An anathema to the broke dick, science-tastic, weak-as-fuck "evidence based" lifters of the modern era who have deluded themselves into thinking that aping the methods of the successful is preposterous, the lifters of the mid-20th Century actually succeeded in the weight room by applying a little observation and introspection and a fuckton of effort.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">One such lifter is Chuck "The Iron Warrior" Sipes, a paratrooper / lumberjack / powerlifter / bodybuilder / proto-Bear Grylls. More hardcore than one of the kill scenes in <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e9e3inw555o" target="_blank">I Spit On Your Grave 3</a>, Sipes managed to rock one of the top three physiques in the world while benching 570lbs and working 12 hours a day slaughtering trees like they were hymens after the prom. Though the Olympia title eluded him like he was an ICE agent chasing Dan Akroyd across the US in a eerily precognizant social commentary on American isolationism, Sipes managed to snag the 1959 IFBB “Mr. America”, the 1960 IFBB “Mr. Universe”, the 1967 NABBA “Mr. World”, and the 1968 IFBB “Mr. World”, </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">while </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">natty as fuck and out-benching every single person on the planet not named Pat Casey (who, incidentally, outweighed Sipes by 135 lbs.)</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Alright- he might not have been more brutal than this, but he was in the conversation.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Now, I realize that the nickname upon which I bestowed Sipes is not the one I just used, but in performing a retrospective on the man's life, I think "Wrath Of The Axe Giant" is far more fitting than the "Iron Warrior", as the former is the pastiche of the title and subtitle of a spectacularly bad Paul Bunyan-themed horror movie in which </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"somebody takes one of the cave trolls from Lord of the Rings, stuffs him into a bunch of flannel and hands him a giant axe, and then sets him loose on a group of assorted degenerates on a maximum-security prison field trip to singalong/labor camp in the Minnesota woods" (Neil). Given that Sipes was a fucking monster, worked in a youth prison, was a tree serial killer by trade, and routinely took at-risk youth into the woods for survivalist and general primeval badassery training, "Wrath of the Axe Giant" fits like a Tijuana hooker onto a donkey cock.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chuck Sipes was apparently conceived with the grip strength that later served him so well as a strongman, and he literally just grabbed fistfuls of his mother's uterus and ripped her abdomen open, forcing himself into the world in a Chuck Norris-esque manner in late 1932. In spite of the brutal manner by which Sipes birthed himself, he grew up a somewhat scrawny kid. As he wanted to play high school football like any other red-blooded, commie-hating, steak-loving American boy, he enlisted the aid of his neighbor, weightlifting equipment luminary Chuck Coker (who later founded Universal Equipment Company). </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The closest thing we have to an image of the moment of Chuck Sipes' birth.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Utilizing the techniques he learned from Coker, Sipes became a beast on the football field and after graduation </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">joined the US Army as a paratrooper. In a bizarre effort to demonstrate the fact that the only person who could kill Chuck Sipes was Chuck Sipes, he found himself tangled with another trooper during a practice drop when he chute didn't open, and then free-fell 70 feet to the ground. Though he steadfastly refused to die, Sipes was stuck in the hospital for four month recuperating from grievous head injuries. Upon receiving a medical discharge in 1952, Sipes went home with a headful of epilepsy and depression and the brass fucking balls of a man who could free fall out of an airplane without a parachute and not only live to tell the tale, but go onto be one of the greatest bodybuilders of the golden era and the greatest drug-free 220lb bencher of all time.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS3nc7RltqaTvmqZyc2bfOMKGZwUuj35CkT2zsig4HCesCxoDvIKfiuvbN1OlLMpls38sGQsdsfdaij4dnoizpIlIJjBIYOE8NSJsdNVeQ6dAYGC8D8Bg_LoI4BEVGp4TZMtMfLULuapZ8/s1600/ca27e190c2f7445d2c9d1f5b70a9893b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1090" data-original-width="640" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgS3nc7RltqaTvmqZyc2bfOMKGZwUuj35CkT2zsig4HCesCxoDvIKfiuvbN1OlLMpls38sGQsdsfdaij4dnoizpIlIJjBIYOE8NSJsdNVeQ6dAYGC8D8Bg_LoI4BEVGp4TZMtMfLULuapZ8/s640/ca27e190c2f7445d2c9d1f5b70a9893b.jpg" width="375" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u><b>Chuck Sipes' Vital Statistics</b></u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b>: 5'9½"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b>: 220 lbs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Arms</b>: 19 ½" (relaxed)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Chest</b>: 50"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Waist</b>: 32"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Thighs</b>: 25 ½"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Calves</b>: 18"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Forearms</b>: 18"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Because the concept of a "natural genetic limit" had not yet been set, Chuck Sipes went about his business in happy ignorance of the "facts" the evidence-based fuckwits spreading their specious claims across the internet like cancer. Training with Mr. Universe Bill Pearl, Sipes set his sights on being the greatest bodybuilder to ever live, though he didn't give two shits about posing and spent the vast majority of his time heaving huge weights around like toddler throwing his toys during a tantrum. In spite of that fact, he racked up an impressive number of wins, including pulling down the </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">“Mr. Pacific Coast” title at the ripe old age of 41.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCVpxMLgyGJnzjDbKiZQbrAF-N3d2N-7Jn-MWByMYdEg_xYrU-LLMJdxSd9bfdcqBoDLmN-DYQh_OVE0n8d_9lSJkUzira3SyyKGs78GJ80c5QJ9tyu4aFbMOHc3Bm6qye5r6l_3PkYX5u/s1600/mti025.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="516" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjCVpxMLgyGJnzjDbKiZQbrAF-N3d2N-7Jn-MWByMYdEg_xYrU-LLMJdxSd9bfdcqBoDLmN-DYQh_OVE0n8d_9lSJkUzira3SyyKGs78GJ80c5QJ9tyu4aFbMOHc3Bm6qye5r6l_3PkYX5u/s1600/mti025.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Notice that headline, natty bros? You guys might want to stop paying attention to those stupid fucking genetics limits charts. The only reason for consulting for examining those entirely specious charts (which I'll cover in a subsequent article) is because you're looking for an excuse to be small and weak.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Unlike modern lifters, who possess all of the personality of a wax replica of Ben Stein, the depth of a spilled shot of vodka, and the varied interests of autistic trapped in a stairwell, Chuck Sipes didn't just lift weights and stare at himself in the mirror. He organized the American Bodybuilding Club in the 1960's, which was practically free to join, and gave exhibitions and lectures on the benefits of fitness and recreational sports. After he hung up his posing trunks, Chuck volunteered with crippled and retarded kids, which is impressive because he was not too far removed from a time when humanity either euthanized them or stuffed them in the basement of a mental institution until some shitbird doctor wanted to torture, lobotomize, or starve them to death. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi-p_X3lWnBOs8CjtqfVWv6l4UBY0trKRKMCNLjJYdQn391Lm1b4Nn42RQYdCPNtnbCpGJ3E-_wqGXskhU8QNHsn-4mNNlw1Er_RbQBj6x3DxheRbl_22_ic0bykBbwSBwzZoZaf5JIc8/s1600-h/sipes_69_U.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi-p_X3lWnBOs8CjtqfVWv6l4UBY0trKRKMCNLjJYdQn391Lm1b4Nn42RQYdCPNtnbCpGJ3E-_wqGXskhU8QNHsn-4mNNlw1Er_RbQBj6x3DxheRbl_22_ic0bykBbwSBwzZoZaf5JIc8/s1600/sipes_69_U.jpg" /></a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It's not every day you see the second biggest bencher on the planet bending rebar in half wearing nothing but an adult diaper and a peace medallion.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As if that wasn't enough do-goodery and well-roundedness, Sipes also painted a shitload of Western landscapes and 19th century mountain men. He also took teenage criminals on on week-long trips into the mountains to teach them to rely on teamwork for survival, presaging the spate of horrible reality television American women would come to watch 30 years later. In spite of all that and his hyper-enthusiastic faith in the Christians' corpse god, Chuck Sipes apparently had enough of the seizures and depression stemming from his head injuries and hung it up</span> on February 24, 1993, at the age of 61. Ever the badass, Sipes was buried in buckskins, just like Davy Crockett would have been if Mexican soldiers hadn't scattered and defiled his remains out of bitterness that they suck at war harder than channers suck at lifting.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"According to [Chuck's best friend] Norm, Chuck began his competitive bodybuilding career unwillingly. Chuck Coker recalls that when Sipes was a lifting competitor in his junior college days in Modesto, there was one occasion when a physique contest was held in connection with the lifting. Chuck’s buddies on the team filled out an entry form to the physique contest, then informed Chuck that he had to get up on stage and pose. He said no at first, but then did sort of a stroll across the stage and hit a few poses"</span> (Roark). </span></blockquote>
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<u style="font-size: x-large;"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chuck Sipes' Contest History</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1958 Mr. Northern California 1st</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1958 Jr. Mr. America 3rd (Western section)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1958 Mr. America 9th</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1959 IFBB Mr. America 1st</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1960 IFBB Mr. Universe 1st</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1966 Mr. Olympia 3rd (won by Larry Scott)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967 Mr. Olympia 2nd (won by Sergio Oliva)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967 NABBA World Championships 1st</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1968 Mr. Northern California 1st</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1968 IFBB Mr. World 1st (The Mr. Olympia was held the same day, and had also taken time to perform strongman stunts.)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1970 IFBB Mr. Universe 2nd medium class (Overall won by Arnold)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1974 Mr. Pacific Coast 1st (over-40 class)</span><br />
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<u style="font-size: x-large;"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chuck Sipes' Best Lifts</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench press</b>: 570 lbs. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>: 600 lbs. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Standing Barbell Curl</b>: 250 lbs. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAoqT4I7VGcT9l_doFLpniu_SZsglqPvovmNwkyw4odI2NZLtrnuHtpi62bCd0DbQpeUpC3V7Dm3AuVlvJjbeipI4HiNvwV68t08tKcmyQnXuwN4mXRwTj5Vuw63WqFIq6CUsUHR1uGLZU/s1600/8d52ee4f-b10d-47e7-8570-b093178ba422.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="240" data-original-width="312" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAoqT4I7VGcT9l_doFLpniu_SZsglqPvovmNwkyw4odI2NZLtrnuHtpi62bCd0DbQpeUpC3V7Dm3AuVlvJjbeipI4HiNvwV68t08tKcmyQnXuwN4mXRwTj5Vuw63WqFIq6CUsUHR1uGLZU/s1600/8d52ee4f-b10d-47e7-8570-b093178ba422.gif" /></span></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Word is that Chuck Sipes was so hot he never even had to get into the shower- women would just squirt spontaneously when he walked by, and he sensibly figured that was good enough.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Yes, yes- get on with how this superhuman maniac trained, right? </span>The man was a goddamn bulldozer, crushing weights all fucking day long, breaking hearts and spines all the live-long day. <span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">According to Dennis Weis, Sipes believed in training often, training heavy, and doing a shitload of supports and partials do build sick tendon and ligament strength. To determine the proper exercises and his set and rep range, Sipes treated lifting like a blind man does an orgy (he just feels it out) and examined the effect of the exercises in previous workouts to determine the best combination of movements to achieve his goals. Sipes believed that he could feel out a good workout, rather than following a set regime in which he followed a system of glacial, unrelentingly boring, counter-intuitive, artificial, incremental progression based on the half cocked theories of geographically distant Communists. Additionally, like any rational, thinking person with a belief in biology, the theory of specialized adaptation, and a general belief in the theory of evolution, Sipes said, </span>"<b>whenever I specialize on a body part, my stamina and endurance improve remarkably. In this way, the muscle ache and tightness I spoke of subsides quickly and in this way, there is less rest between sets</b>" (Weis <i>Power</i>).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This led Sipes, even while training for strength, to rest between sets "only momentarily, probably less than 10 seconds. On most regular type exercise schedules, my rest periods between sets are around 20 to 30 seconds and no more." Additionally, he followed a super-intense split, in which he trained two to three times a day, six days a week. There was no retarded Stuart McRobert-loving whining about how he had bad genetics, or a Mentzer-esque love for abstaining from the gym in deference to the library and methamphetamines, wherein he would have spent countless hours misinterpreting an extremely simple subset of Russian philosophy, or an incessant screeching about the need for layoffs and deloads, <b>but rather a dedication to busting his ass on the exercise on which he wanted to get very, very good</b>. </span></div>
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Even in his 50s, Sipes looked like a fucking golden god with his shirt off.</div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In spite of his nearly psychotic dedication to training, Sipes wasn't above heading off into the woods with up-and-coming teenage criminals, with friends, or by himself for a week or more at a time. Giving exactly zero fucks about his diet or how it would impact his latest round of a terrible cookie-cutter Russian routine, Chuck would just forge out into the woods and have a good time. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">"Norm recalls trips into the mountains and workouts involving cables, which would be tied around trees and then stretched in various exercises. Their conversations around campfires on such outings were the underpinnings of a lifelong friendship, and now, when Norm speaks of Chuck, it is with warmth, love, respect, and bewilderment as to what changed Chuck’s outlook later in life. After a month in the woods, Chuck’s bodyweight often decreased by 15 to 20 pounds, <b>and Norm remembers the amazing transformation Chuck could undergo in regaining the lost weight and muscle. He simply ate more and lifted. No drugs</b>" (Roark).</span> </span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0IlTyIYNnl-CquVIwuYJegQKzqIFP6dDGSsnFAugXZ7qqbj7i0IBseMTaM79DlMEnNvBE2y26XOOT7oiVgis9w-ZXkJoKX9V5spTt_A3hyphenhyphencNaqOR4XsinXLZVnG6jYc2smBx7mQYFnhY/s1600-h/med_1212460721-chuck_4.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: left;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0IlTyIYNnl-CquVIwuYJegQKzqIFP6dDGSsnFAugXZ7qqbj7i0IBseMTaM79DlMEnNvBE2y26XOOT7oiVgis9w-ZXkJoKX9V5spTt_A3hyphenhyphencNaqOR4XsinXLZVnG6jYc2smBx7mQYFnhY/s1600/med_1212460721-chuck_4.jpg" /></a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A message to everyone who thinks the bench is pointless- every sopping pair of panties generated by this photo would care to disagree.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If nothing else, Chuck Sipes should stand as an example of how to approach training- with an open mind and zero fucks given. His method was essentially a weightlifting paean to Bruce Lee's philosophy of amalgamating the most effective fighting styles into his own, and a nod to everyone whose ever thrown anything they could find in the fridge and cupboard into a pot and unwittingly produced the best fucking chili anyone ever ate. Additionally, it's not unlike the Paleo crossfitter who buys a burger and tosses the bun- there's something to be learned from just about everybody, and no one's above analyzing the greats from any sport to help propel themselves to a semblance of that greatness. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That said, here are some of the methods Sipes employed over the course of his career (and those methods were fucking legion).</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQfaBdLx_cJmI0ABg_zI-rLliuJSsZ_GxEVr39bjSKAQ8JoaApjf_pPhL4jyLdntIi3SP2hVxrNnSDolVNOb4hZDulp9hxiyCVBRX_xcbEt82dggUw5DR9IyUbjmO2EV1kfle3sdMWJafX/s1600/sipes6.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="550" data-original-width="780" height="451" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQfaBdLx_cJmI0ABg_zI-rLliuJSsZ_GxEVr39bjSKAQ8JoaApjf_pPhL4jyLdntIi3SP2hVxrNnSDolVNOb4hZDulp9hxiyCVBRX_xcbEt82dggUw5DR9IyUbjmO2EV1kfle3sdMWJafX/s640/sipes6.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<u style="text-align: left;"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Power Routine</span></b></u><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Back Squat</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>6, 6, 4, 4, 2, 2</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>6, 6, 4, 4, 2, 2</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Conventional Deadlift</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>6, 6, 4, 4, 2, 2,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Shrug</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>4 x 8</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cheat Curl</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>4 x 6</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Preacher Curl</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>5 x 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Situp</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>3 x 20</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Leg Raise</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>4 x 15</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Overhead Press</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>5 x 6</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline DB Flye</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>3 x 8</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf Raise</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>4 x 20</span></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tuesday/Friday</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Heavy 1/4 Bench Press</b><span style="text-align: left;"> – </span>5 x 8 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Heavy 1/4 Back Squat</b>, (no lockout, 50-100lb over your max squat)<span style="text-align: left;"> </span><span style="text-align: left;">–</span><span style="text-align: left;"> </span> 5 x 8 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff Legged Deadlift off Bench or Box</b> (bodybuilding-style deficits) – 5 x 4 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Chins</b> – 6 x 6</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dips</b> – 5 x 8</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lying French Press</b> – 5 x 8</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Abs</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Incidentally, Sipes recommended trying for max on the powerlifts every two months, and added weight whenever possible to his training weights to facilitate progress.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACwrJNRPIbeLIa7qMLI7e0hUJvzgN50qJz_kdyUrMdodIUZZ3U9w-ZcF2pNyrNArvoaT0syzMb2FtIDNP5JXXz5Cc5RXKjSFZJ7xp_Pb3k_VCPxoYv8a3DmNyBtrRkipCszlWxBoQorM/s1600-h/sipes1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjACwrJNRPIbeLIa7qMLI7e0hUJvzgN50qJz_kdyUrMdodIUZZ3U9w-ZcF2pNyrNArvoaT0syzMb2FtIDNP5JXXz5Cc5RXKjSFZJ7xp_Pb3k_VCPxoYv8a3DmNyBtrRkipCszlWxBoQorM/s320/sipes1.jpg" /></a></span></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Bench Routine</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Of all of Sipes' routines, this is the one in which we all are likely most interested, because Sipes' bench was fucking insane. True to form, this routine is not for the faint of heart, fans of Rippetoe or anything with "Starting" in the title, Channers, or the vast majority of Redditors, because it involves no equivocation, stupid selfies, or whining. Chuck did this fucking lunacy for six straight months prior to a meet and was what gave him a flat backed, 2 second pause on the chest, 570lb competition bench press.</span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Monday / Wednesday</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> – 2 x 10 (warmup); 2 x 6; 2 x 4; 2 x 2; 4 x 1</span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tuesday / Thursday</span></u></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Heavy Supports</b> – 5 x 8 (100 lbs. over best press from ¼ way down to lockout)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> – Close to maximum poundage.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Heavy Supports</b> – 150 lbs. over best press, holding with a slight elbow bend.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> – close to maximum poundage.</span></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Friday</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Press (wide grip, slow reps)</b> – 4 x 6.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbell Incline Press (slow reps)</b> – 4 x 6.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pullovers (very light weight, deep breaths following 1 minute jumping rope)</b> – 2 x 20</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Flat Flyes (very deep breaths)</b> – 4 x 8.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrngyejrnKTdtMI6lTaSA2CbeD_uSetzi0KREK7MSc12j1D-zFo6fzPcmp6Akm2ECRcM0YYvBXAHMkNlOBDXDJf3jyrbuVtfM-VL7LpsBVXbMRr7e483QoI9dhz3B2xUoYh-ZVhroC7Xr0/s1600/sipes4.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="432" data-original-width="544" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrngyejrnKTdtMI6lTaSA2CbeD_uSetzi0KREK7MSc12j1D-zFo6fzPcmp6Akm2ECRcM0YYvBXAHMkNlOBDXDJf3jyrbuVtfM-VL7LpsBVXbMRr7e483QoI9dhz3B2xUoYh-ZVhroC7Xr0/s1600/sipes4.png" /></span></a></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Alternate Bench Routine</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This routine was done three times a week to bring the bench up quickly or to prepare for a meet.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Speed Bench</b> – 6 sets of 10. Use a light weight and accelerate the bar from the chest as rapidly as possible.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Ultra-heavy Negative Bench Press</b> – 4 × 8. Fight weight slowly to chest. Use about 100 lbs. over best lift.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Supports</b> (Hold supramaximal weight at lockout)– 6 x 10 seconds </span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwbr3oqTC3qNsHMalG_C9PrRBcJaILksi0p0ai5NmLzVGosCK6vFdy9WNsQpLEZ93rD6kkpkQOy8PaQJQVVWiUAF4yD0CO7b4mijeHs2t5dkeEHIw-6R8jnjmFZ3FCXjoIyaPH8-ts5uzA/s1600/Amazing_Chuck_Sipes_Physique.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="450" data-original-width="367" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjwbr3oqTC3qNsHMalG_C9PrRBcJaILksi0p0ai5NmLzVGosCK6vFdy9WNsQpLEZ93rD6kkpkQOy8PaQJQVVWiUAF4yD0CO7b4mijeHs2t5dkeEHIw-6R8jnjmFZ3FCXjoIyaPH8-ts5uzA/s1600/Amazing_Chuck_Sipes_Physique.jpg" /></a></div>
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Sipes had some seriously big quads and upper arms at 220, but his calves and forearms were the really fucking ridiculous sections of his limbs.</div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Squat Routine</span></b></u></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Full Squat </b>– 2 x 8 (warmup); 2 x 6: 2 x 4; 2 x 2; 2 x 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Quarter Squat</b> – 6 x 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Leg Press</b> – 8 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Interestingly, Chuck Sipes and I arrived at the same solution for getting stuck in the hole on squats. Great minds and all that, it seems.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Chuck recommended incorporating jumping squats with a barbell of a dumbbell in each hand, using a light weight. He mentioned 4 sets of 10 reps. The last 2 reps should feel hard but you should still be able to spring up forcefully. When you can do 8 out of 10 reps the weight is probably just right. When you achieve 10 proper reps it is time to add 20 lbs. to the squat bar or 10 lbs. to each dumbbell. This exercise will build the initial driving power" (Weis <i>Power</i>). </span></span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR0NRe53f8XGndxHl2yBF-QhWwEknquzpqjzvwj6UhQ5YYrxZI1ClAYEy8CaN55jnXm63rDtJcMJWiwdJPlkpPGL9oWJLxvVg_ZQchOv74BfRvrsvEdosXYwvm62U4JTxlDw0vw0HKlaNn/s1600/med_1209151838-sipes.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="248" data-original-width="189" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiR0NRe53f8XGndxHl2yBF-QhWwEknquzpqjzvwj6UhQ5YYrxZI1ClAYEy8CaN55jnXm63rDtJcMJWiwdJPlkpPGL9oWJLxvVg_ZQchOv74BfRvrsvEdosXYwvm62U4JTxlDw0vw0HKlaNn/s1600/med_1209151838-sipes.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Forearm Routine</span></b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Guaranteed to turn your hands into immobile claws for a couple of weeks, this brutal routine is what resulted in Sipes' insane 18" forearms... along with a hell of a lot of chopping wood. How the man managed to do both is a mystery for the ages, because a day of swinging an axe alone is enough to reduce most humans to a pile of blubbering bullshit, and this dude did both.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Curl (slowly)</b> – 4 x 8</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>DB Wrist Forearm Curl (off knee)</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">–</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 × 15</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable or Pulley Reverse Curl</b> – 4 × 12</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Rubber Ball Squeeze, Newspaper Roll-up, etc.</b></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcMVKZ_LJTT5uZ5-kn9b3JRmLacry51-vZObMcOGRegtqphQJqobI22LF-dE6fVSsyNrtX87tssUqP54IRIdMcx4KPMt00sihSGoDOupP2G5NQeL2ctQwZOht0sd-ES8JP1ApZCfiXMl7t/s1600/Chuck.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="433" data-original-width="300" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjcMVKZ_LJTT5uZ5-kn9b3JRmLacry51-vZObMcOGRegtqphQJqobI22LF-dE6fVSsyNrtX87tssUqP54IRIdMcx4KPMt00sihSGoDOupP2G5NQeL2ctQwZOht0sd-ES8JP1ApZCfiXMl7t/s1600/Chuck.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Ab Routine</span></b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Though Sipes was something of a mass monster for his era and an absolute life-ruiner on the bench, even Zabo Koszewski envied the man's abs. When following this program, this indefatigable tree-slaughtering maniac would do the following twice a day <i>for the first six months</i> and then there times a day the second half of the year. The man trained so hard peoples' eyes bleed just reading this fucking insanity, but it's one more reminder that we're all a pack of pussies by comparison to lifters of yesteryear.</span></span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbUD7FmF3aGWzy3avAr0wROOgSouDy4WcUb33cd6_a_SQBfPynmiP2XK5W0XLaWoudMLU92OTiv6KyUgtyeFBEH2-VKgLs5CV1LmZ-HJnjzMLkWvew0h01eNW3XZHEnWQuHyGWtgQT8KMS/s1600/1eb8df3c-db43-44fd-b0ec-0acaf538d07e.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="333" data-original-width="500" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbUD7FmF3aGWzy3avAr0wROOgSouDy4WcUb33cd6_a_SQBfPynmiP2XK5W0XLaWoudMLU92OTiv6KyUgtyeFBEH2-VKgLs5CV1LmZ-HJnjzMLkWvew0h01eNW3XZHEnWQuHyGWtgQT8KMS/s320/1eb8df3c-db43-44fd-b0ec-0acaf538d07e.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Not even the rage virus will have you ready for this insanity.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; text-align: justify;">"I feel that SPEED OF MOVEMENT in abs training is the KEY to ZENITH development in the abdominal region. I always tried to CONCENTRATE on rapid, quick movements with continuous tension and flexing in the movements of waist work. I might mention that that I didn’t sacrifice strictness of movement in the exercises. The speed of movement is obtained over a period of many months while on this SPECIAL program. The increased speed of movement per rep doesn’t happen in the first month of training. From what I have observed from my many travels and training with many bodybuilders, most don’t concentrate on this speed of movement in their abs programs" (Weis <i>Power</i>).</span></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Situps</b> – 2 x 25 </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Situps (25lb plate behind head)</b><b> </b>– 2 x 8 at each position on a 7 run incline board.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Bends</b> – 2 x 50 (done with a stick or bar held behind the neck, he would expel all the air from my lungs and bend forward to a parallel position to the floor)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Side Bends</b> – 2 x 50 (done with a stick or bar held behind the neck, bending from side to side in a rapid succession, touching the elbows to the sides)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Board Leg Raises (with <a href="http://atomicathletic.com/store/index.php/iron-boots.html" target="_blank">iron boots for resistance</a>)</b><b> </b>– 4 x 8.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Stomach Vacuums</b> – 4 x 8. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK79Fy5YH1TetrRIx9c_WIFaKJDJbYwO62GfVN-VPGqu3gQ7IeembPrliI_L8vvYaZIjsZd-pdHu7SUdyxCC_MMK1SO3kGM0JkvHH3y2nu-gmxerqmIT-TVP3GKe77Frj-t8DCx_vWNiA/s1600-h/sipes2.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhK79Fy5YH1TetrRIx9c_WIFaKJDJbYwO62GfVN-VPGqu3gQ7IeembPrliI_L8vvYaZIjsZd-pdHu7SUdyxCC_MMK1SO3kGM0JkvHH3y2nu-gmxerqmIT-TVP3GKe77Frj-t8DCx_vWNiA/s400/sipes2.jpg" width="311" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Shape and Size Arm Routine</span></b></u></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As with every other bodypart, Sipes had a lot of different methods for training his gigantic arms, each one crazier than a bunny in a blender on Easter morning. Interestingly, Chuck had extremely different methods for training his arms based on what he was doing- when it was for shape and size, he focused on biceps, but as you'll see in the power section, triceps were his focus in training for pressing power. In his own words:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Many bodybuilders say the triceps is first in arm importance, saying it is the largest muscle in the arm. I rank the triceps last on my list. Why? An unimpressive, large but droopy and poorly shaped arm is not what I want. Besides, the triceps are not as important in my strength feats.</span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">With the triceps last, next up the list with me is forearms. This muscular area of the arms is vital both to appearance - nothing is so unsightly as a big upper arm and a pair of sticks for forearms - and for gripping strength well developed forearms are essential. Every bodybuilder should work the forearms regularly as part of their workouts. I worked in sawmills and lumberjacking when I was younger, and this helped my development and strength quite a bit.</span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">But, at the top of the list is the biceps area. The better developed and stronger your biceps are, the better off you will be physically. They should be #1 on your arm training list. Therefore, this arm development article will concentrate on developing this area, the biceps" (Sipes <i>Biceps</i>).</span></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Monday/Thursday</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curl 21's</b> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">7 reps from bottom position to middle position, </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">7 reps from middle position to top of movement,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">7 full-range reps </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 sets x 21 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cheat Barbell Curl</b>: </span></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">16 x 4 (You read that right- sixteen sets of four)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Alternate one set of 21's to each 4 sets of Cheat Curls.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lying French Press 21's</b> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Conventional Lying French Press</b></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">: </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">16 x 4</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">One set of 21's to each 4 sets of regular French presses</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjowaOP-G84f9BzzKfLlVXWR4JnCCQw9P0hNbp-McQ-YiQ7Dsl0jK22xwFGjlXWaLJNGHPMBoOxN7NJ16TQ8q0fVjleoHAbh6rA1-WC1-jpY1uaXSjnJ5jRU8qbyle91ThxOHw5pgy6m8pN/s1600/chukie+arm.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="960" data-original-width="592" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjowaOP-G84f9BzzKfLlVXWR4JnCCQw9P0hNbp-McQ-YiQ7Dsl0jK22xwFGjlXWaLJNGHPMBoOxN7NJ16TQ8q0fVjleoHAbh6rA1-WC1-jpY1uaXSjnJ5jRU8qbyle91ThxOHw5pgy6m8pN/s640/chukie+arm.jpg" width="394" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Power Arm Routine</span></b></u></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Monday/Thursday</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>SUPERSET ONE</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cheat Curls</b> – 5 x 6 - 8 (explosive cheat on the concentric, extremely slow descent on the eccentric portion)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Concentration Curls</b> – 5 x 10 - 12 (Elbow braced on the thigh, one second peak contraction, one second pause fully relaxed at bottom)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>SUPERSET TWO</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Alternating Dumbell Curls</b> – 5 x 6 - 8 (ultra heavy with a slight cheat)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Alternating Incline Curl</b> – 5 x 8 (moderate weight, slow and controlled)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Barbell Curl </b>– 6 x 6 - 8 </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As for the triceps, Sipes thought this was basically the most important accessory work you could do for the bench, and he studied it like most male Redditors study PUA techniques in an effort to get their dick wet before their 50th birthday.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"The history of weight training has proved to be a constant game of hide and seek. Truant muscles are no longer safe from the prying efforts of modern power lifters. In the case of the bench press, the triceps, with its natural capacity for development, became suspect when it appeared to be riding on the efforts of the delts and pecs. </span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">At first, no one could say for sure. Maybe it was the delts. So they tried military presses. they didn't prove to help the bench a great deal. So they tried parallel dips with plenty of weight. Pat Casey did them endlessly, dropping to an extremely low position, but they ground up his shoulders, and he stopped. Extreme range of motion like the military and dip was out; the pecs and delts were out. That left the triceps" (Sipes <i>Tricep Power </i>109).</span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Thus comes into being the 'Triceps Power Cheats,' a movement that is spanking the triceps into unprecedented effort and routine [bench press] records up the line. The movement flanks the regular bench press on the alternate workout of the week in which the bench press and [box squats]. In terms of two workouts a week, Saturday (heavy) and Tuesday, the power cheats fall on Tuesday" (</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes </span><i>Tricep Power </i><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">112).</span></span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIkbMytkC5uavhzu4WSydTtOBwEyWG03sgt1bdzfGjBeUQ0CKXUKln4NIE7jlZis6ut9Y-zJqpXhi4dw1-eH1yI0VNRzdFTx-g8i9_srWJ9WS-5bo8tR3fFCKwaeGX4K8XP9kPDOE5v1wn/s1600/Triceps+Power+Cheat.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-family: Tinos; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="574" data-original-width="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIkbMytkC5uavhzu4WSydTtOBwEyWG03sgt1bdzfGjBeUQ0CKXUKln4NIE7jlZis6ut9Y-zJqpXhi4dw1-eH1yI0VNRzdFTx-g8i9_srWJ9WS-5bo8tR3fFCKwaeGX4K8XP9kPDOE5v1wn/s1600/Triceps+Power+Cheat.jpg" /></a></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The pic I took isn't blurry- the pic of which I took a pic was.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The two exercises Sipes recommended were the Pullover Triceps Cheat and the Power Rack Triceps Lockout. Done twice a week with one of two methodologies, Sipes and other huge benchers of the time considered these exercises critical for a massive bench. Depending on your preference, you can use the Bill West style for this or Pat Casey's style- Sipes respected the fuck out of both men and thought both styles had merit.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pullover Triceps Cheat</b></span></div>
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<b style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;">(Bill West Method)</b><span style="font-family: verdana, sans-serif;"> West would put a folded towel on the bench a few inches over his head and do his pullovers from that point, heaving the weight up over his eyes and then bouncing it off the bench in between reps so he could handle bigger poundages (pictured above top left). His rep scheme looked like this:</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">135 - 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">185 - 5 </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">205 - 5</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">205 - 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">255 - 6 singles</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8WNBkDM1fSC8PcAxdnHWDKZMNiWuKgVdImJRaozEEjhGqKiWZYipDls6nPtgwaDKrMxpoglNrsG1Lkxx6Vypu8URaspqLwIndW4X0fAb9HChN7XiKME_fMlQpaz09BgwXmChV4zZwh8LE/s1600/n2ftxd.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="316" data-original-width="347" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi8WNBkDM1fSC8PcAxdnHWDKZMNiWuKgVdImJRaozEEjhGqKiWZYipDls6nPtgwaDKrMxpoglNrsG1Lkxx6Vypu8URaspqLwIndW4X0fAb9HChN7XiKME_fMlQpaz09BgwXmChV4zZwh8LE/s1600/n2ftxd.png" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>(Pat Casey Method)</b> Casey was the only human on the planet benching more than Sipes, and he used this method- he'd have the loaded barbell on the floor off the end of the bench, hooks his feet around the supports for stability, starts the movement as a pullover off the floor and continues it as an extension to the top. Per the picture it looks like a pullover and press, but from the description it sounds like you're using lat strength and momentum to get the bar moving and then finish it like you did a skull crusher from just over the top of your head.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">135 - 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">225 - 5</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">275 - 5</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">305 - 3</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">325 - 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">340</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">355</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">370</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">325</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">305</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- 1</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">275 - 8</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Power Rack Triceps Lockout</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>(Bill West Method)</b> On an incline bench set at a 60 degree incline, take the barbell out of the rack with a grip about six inches apart and do short range skull crushers from just above your forehead to lockout. Your upper arm should stay in the same vertical plane as the bar.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">135 - 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">150 - 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">170 - 7 x 7</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>(Pat Casey Method)</b> Casey did these slightly differently, setting the pins in the power rack just above forehead level and pressing off the pins. He did these quickly, for a pump.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">225 - 6 x 7</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Seated French Presses</b> (as a high rep burnout)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">3 x 10</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Of note, Sipes basically thought you were a pink-bitch pussy if you used the cambered bar on tricep work and that you were basically just wasting your fucking time, so give the Olympic barbell a shot for these and see how they work for you.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOI8dl7wxrArQqoxJu3OS1hxKnU43rtZjaq9ec-9C-sq5hlZ5Ur8kPGjhzqT9AdAkuPBka8o6c3ggpaFmnfduN19rWZLDyFpefVPMT1pqCEWsOrveoAp3QVRIXzUfSO-HJit4dgAjdyKCc/s1600/sipes3.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="432" data-original-width="360" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOI8dl7wxrArQqoxJu3OS1hxKnU43rtZjaq9ec-9C-sq5hlZ5Ur8kPGjhzqT9AdAkuPBka8o6c3ggpaFmnfduN19rWZLDyFpefVPMT1pqCEWsOrveoAp3QVRIXzUfSO-HJit4dgAjdyKCc/s640/sipes3.png" width="532" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Sipes' Diet</span></b></u></span> </span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes was not a complicated man- like a lot of wildly successful maniacs, he preferred a simple plan involving a headlong charge into the proverbial teeth of the enemy to a complex strategy with a lot of moving parts. As such, his diet was so simple even a Trump supporter could follow it, if they could fit the feedings in between tent revivals, denouncing science, and attending Flat Earther conventions. </span></span></span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Eat a well-balanced diet of meats, fish, fruits and vegetables. Avoid high-calorie foods such as bread, cake, candy, macaroni products and all foods containing white flour and white sugar. High-calorie foods add fat to your waistline and will make your abdominal training a whole lot tougher than it should be. [The most important additions to your regular diet are] germ oils, sunflower seeds, papaya, peanuts and lots of milk.</span></span></span></span> </blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Drink 3-4 quarts of certified low-fat raw milk each day, a Chuck Sipes favorite for gaining (at least one pint or more with each feeding)" (Weis <i>Huge</i>). </span></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Never one to follow the same day to day program like a mindless robot hell bent on mediocrity, it's impossible to get a highly accurate depiction of what Chuck ate day to day, but this is a general overview of his daily eating habits.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Meal 1</b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">4 eggs with cheese</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Whole-wheat stoneground bread and honey</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Wholegrain cereal milk and fruit</span></span><br />
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</span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><u><b>Meal 2</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Fresh fruit and almonds</span></span><br />
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</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Meal 3</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Fruit juice</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Large salad with sunflower seeds and 2 large whole-wheat peanut butter sandwiches, two classes of milk</span></span><br />
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</span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><u><b>Meal 4</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Nuts and fruit or his bulk drink, which was:</span></span><br />
<ul style="text-align: left;">
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 cups milk</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Protein powder</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2 spoonfuls Blackstrap molasses</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 spoonful honey</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 spoonful Ovaltine</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 banana</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1 scoop natural ice cream</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b>Meal 5</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Steak or fish with salad and brown rice</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Some whole-wheat bread and butter</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tea with honey</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And some natural ice cream</span></span><br />
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</span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span><u><b>Meal 6 (Bedtime)</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">A glass of fresh juice and sunflower seeds</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">So, in summary:</span><br />
<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chuck was a bad motherfucker</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">He trained around the clock on lifts on which he wanted to improve. </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">He was strong as a fucking bull moose and took no shit in competition.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">He was simultaneously ripped to fucking shreds and insanely strong.</span></li>
</ul>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Certainly, none of the bitch-made charlatans out there promoting evidence based training would support Sipes' methodology, but none of them could reproduce Sipes' results, either. That alone should point to the fact that their methodology is flawed, but given the fact I would have a better chance convincing a born-again Christian that Jesus is sharing a bunk bed with the Easter Bunny in hell than convincing a fan of evidence based training that the "facts" they hold so dear are anything but, I suppose I'm just pissing in the wind and calling it rain. Nevertheless, you ignore the methods utilized by this mythic badass at your peril. Don't imperil yourself.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">In short, if you think you train hard enough, Chuck Sipes and the demon succubi currently blowing him in hell say, "Go fuck yourself, pussy."</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I know- Sipes would be pissy about the porn because he followed the Christ-man, but if you're in that crew and you hang yourself, you're signing up for that eternal suntan because Yahweh in his "infinite wisdom" apparently gives zero fucks about CTE.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Sources:</b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Duckett, Ian. Chuck's eating plan. Old But Strong. 3 Aug 2016. Web. 6 Jun 2018. <a href="http://oldbutstrong.co.uk/nutrition/chucks-eating-plan">http://oldbutstrong.co.uk/nutrition/chucks-eating-plan</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Kelly, Bradley Joe. Bodybuilding's original superhero: Chuck Sipes. T-Nation. 2 Nov 2012. Web. 5 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.t-nation.com/training/bodybuildings-original-superhero-chuck-sipes">https://www.t-nation.com/training/bodybuildings-original-superhero-chuck-sipes</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Neil, Garrett and Sean Neil. Axe Giant: The Wrath of Paul Bunyan. Something Awful. 7 Dec 2013. Web. 6 Jun 2018. <a href="https://www.somethingawful.com/movie-reviews/paul-bunyan/1/">https://www.somethingawful.com/movie-reviews/paul-bunyan/1/</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-align: justify;">Pearl, Bill. Chuck Sipes- "The iron knight." Reprint from </span><i style="text-align: justify;">Legends of the Iron Game</i><span style="text-align: justify;">. Bodybuilders Reality. </span><a href="http://bodybuildersreality.com/chuck-sipes-the-iron-knight/" style="text-align: justify;">http://bodybuildersreality.com/chuck-sipes-the-iron-knight/</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Roark, Joe. The Roark Report - Chuck Sipes. Iron Game History. 1993 May;2(6)20-21.</span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="text-align: justify;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes, Chuck. Ab specialization routine. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso ban. 9 may 2014. Web. 5 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2014/05/ab-specialization-routine-chuck-sipes.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2014/05/ab-specialization-routine-chuck-sipes.html</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes, Chuck. Biceps development. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban.29 Aug 2009. Web. 5 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/04/biceps-chuck-sipes.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/04/biceps-chuck-sipes.html</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes, Chuck. Put the slant in your abdominal training (1968). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 5 Feb 2012. Web. 5 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2012/02/six-pack-circa-1968-chuck-sipes.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2012/02/six-pack-circa-1968-chuck-sipes.html</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes, Chuck. Routines. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 15 Sep 2013. Web. 5 Jun 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2013/09/chuck-sipes.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2013/09/chuck-sipes.html</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sipes, Chuck. Triceps power cheats (1966). Muscle Builder Magazine. Reprinted in <i>Forgotten Secrets of the Culver City Westside Barbell Club Revealed </i>by Dave Yarnell. Lexington: Self Published, 2014. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Weis, Dennis B. Chuck Sipes on Power Training. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 1 Aug 2009. Web. 5 Jun 2018. </span><a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/08/chuck-sipes-on-power-training-dennis.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/08/chuck-sipes-on-power-training-dennis.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"></span><br />
Weis Dennis B. Huge and freaky mass concepts! Gain herculean muscle mass and power fast! Dennis B. Weis. Web. 6 Jun 2018. <a href="http://www.dennisbweis.com/Articles/HugeandFreakyMassConcepts.html">http://www.dennisbweis.com/Articles/HugeandFreakyMassConcepts.html</a></span><br />
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com24tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-1055588593669931712018-05-29T15:10:00.001-04:002018-06-05T11:43:38.954-04:00Zabo Koszewski Would Like To Remind You That Not Every Lifter In The 1950's Was Fat (And That Partying And Lifting Can Go Hand In Hand)<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDOMT5bb5_4sAkPOU-aygED583TFE4KgGm7_Dt0cJJDNoPO9s3N-_Z7XPlLOwHiNIcZNwUYRZYQ_X2itjohnKpcwSbcyRIH0siVLRaemfDCBrRd4WUoPKrzMbZ4j2sJNVrMWVZTwdZHsMc/s1600/33154346_2168431323389180_5272496071543619584_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="576" data-original-width="564" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDOMT5bb5_4sAkPOU-aygED583TFE4KgGm7_Dt0cJJDNoPO9s3N-_Z7XPlLOwHiNIcZNwUYRZYQ_X2itjohnKpcwSbcyRIH0siVLRaemfDCBrRd4WUoPKrzMbZ4j2sJNVrMWVZTwdZHsMc/s1600/33154346_2168431323389180_5272496071543619584_n.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I am often asked why I don't write about so-and-so bodybuilder / strongman / powerlifter, and why I seem to ignore anyone who competed after 2000. The reason for this is simple- lifters in the modern era are so fucking boring that I have to pop ephedrine and slam a <a href="https://vpxsports.com/bang/" target="_blank">Bang</a> just to get through six paragraphs of their endlessly dull, Soviet-factory-worker-esque, grey and beige, do-nothing-but-lift-and-eat, uninteresting lives. They have all of the personality of a dead carp, all of the intrigue of a Real Housewives episode, the depth of a puddle in the Kalahari, and generally make me wish I could hop in a DeLorean with Marty McFly and fuck off back to 1954, when the chicks looked like Bettie Page and the bros in Muscle Beach were so fucking cool that James Dean looked like a fucking Channer by comparison.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8-aCjHhmnZpP33kcVHWapXMczifAk3zvKDcD6GZs77yWqwCps5Crmis0z21K7f5_tN19S368K-V-KiKhNeEFuUd3gk212o3BUp0MvG_sYXQW9N_v8zhUSeg7tCIAnXLr6iEDtTYMR0CWl/s1600/sh5406.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="504" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8-aCjHhmnZpP33kcVHWapXMczifAk3zvKDcD6GZs77yWqwCps5Crmis0z21K7f5_tN19S368K-V-KiKhNeEFuUd3gk212o3BUp0MvG_sYXQW9N_v8zhUSeg7tCIAnXLr6iEDtTYMR0CWl/s1600/sh5406.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The lifters of yesteryear, however, were a far different breed- they mixed the fuck out of business and pleasure, competed in a variety of sports, and were generally people you'd want to hang around with, rather than dickheads who would simply slump half dead from drugs in front of you mumbling about training while they morosely masticate whatever bland fare they happened to bring with them in their dumbass wheelie bag cooler fuckery. Fun is dead in the lifting world, killed by people taking a pastime far too fucking seriously for no reason than they lack the personality to do something interesting with it.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-znvqqWOeyZqrg8XDmI-zAQrtDcbtFuuszZx3EQqthEeLHsWOgvuB5_lQdvFKcvNVVQJqYWdEeDWeVE4cRyQpntXeUk-UecUikEhzGMiP1Wkez-ISq0IfDfBo2Jwl-z8RHMjE5N849kY5/s1600/ef48dd01136af9d146480d9ab140a572.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="401" data-original-width="244" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh-znvqqWOeyZqrg8XDmI-zAQrtDcbtFuuszZx3EQqthEeLHsWOgvuB5_lQdvFKcvNVVQJqYWdEeDWeVE4cRyQpntXeUk-UecUikEhzGMiP1Wkez-ISq0IfDfBo2Jwl-z8RHMjE5N849kY5/s1600/ef48dd01136af9d146480d9ab140a572.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">My man must've gotten more ass than a proctologist's right hand. That skinny fucker next to him probably got laid just for standing next to Zabo. Picking up shrapnel still counts as a notch in your belt, people.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That said, it stands to reason we should investigate the life, training style, and diet of one the most ripped and compelling men in 1950s and 60s Muscle Beach, Irwin "Zabo" Koszewski. Of all of the guys of whom you’ve likely never heard, Zabo Koszewski should rate pretty highly on your “Holy Shit”-ometer due to his freakish leanness in a time when most guys were softer than a pile of baby shit left out in a light rain on a June day in Bangkok, and respect is due for the fact that he trained and hung out with the aforementioned <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/who-fuck-says-you-have-to-squat-steve.html?zx=59b30cacaafabc10" target="_blank">Steve Merjanian</a> and (likely) <a href="https://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/behold-mighty-chuck-ahrens-whose-corpse.html" target="_blank">Chuck Ahrens</a>, in spite of the fact that he was half as big and ten times as lean as those two. A fixture of Muscle Beach from 1951 to the end of his life, Koszewski pulled down more “Best Abdominal” awards than anyone in history, likely owing to the fact that he dieted and trained more fanatically than a channer at a gun range before shooting up the local high school (Hise).</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Zabo on the left, showing some of the Gold's Gym crew what the fuck was up with his abs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u><b>Zabo Koszewski Vital Statistics</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Born</b>: August 20, 1924</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Died</b>: March 29, 2009 (Aged 84)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b>: 5'10"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b>: 170 - 185lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Though Zabo was best known for his insane cuts and his amazing year-round condition, the dude trained so often and so hard that he could still put on a show in the gym, barefoot and in street clothes. For no other reason than because he could, Zabo was seen more than once snatching and clean and strict pressing 220 lbs, followed by a full clean and split jerk with 270lbs in slacks, a button down shirt, and barefoot, with no warmup. Though that’s not Earth shattering, I highly doubt you can name a non-Olympic weightlifter who weighs 170 - 185lbs and can duplicate that feat... and I would venture to guess that Zabo was spitting game to any chicks within earshot the entire time he was putting on that show.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Zabo, ripped and ready to fuck shit up like he was in the prequel to <i>Commando</i> in WW2.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Zabo was nothing if not a showman- the man's life reads like a bucket list for the Dos Equis man. Former training partner of Arnold and publisher of <i>Iron Man</i> magazine, John Balik, said that even in an era as cartoonishly outlandish as 1960's Muscle Beach, Koszewski "was the embodiment of the spirit of Muscle Beach" (Hise). Zabo grew in New Jersey, a three sport athlete in high school, although his first love was weightlifting. After high school, Zabo enlisted in the Army and made three combat landings in WW2, likely running around like Stallone in <i>Rambo II</i> and surviving solely on the basis of his superhumanly shredded physique. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>"Irwin had been in Guadalcanal when the Japanese overran the place, and he stayed under the water sucking air through a piece of bamboo for several days while the enemy was poking around the water with bayonets. Irwin managed to dodge the bayonets and get home safely" (Yarnell 205).</b></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">After running out of bad guys to slaughter, Zabo became the valet of the original Nature Boy, Buddy Rogers, wrestling under the name Jungle Boy. At the same time, Zabo began entering just about every bodybuilding competition in the continental US, destroying the opposition in small shows but losing the bigger ones to that era's mass monsters (the guys who won "Most Muscular" almost never won the overall, and Zabo always walked away with that trophy).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">When Buddy Rogers and Zabo walked into a bar, every guy in there must have considered suicide because there's no way they were getting any ass off a chick within five square miles of those two.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the early 1950's Zabo had his fill of greasy Italians and hoagies and headed West, to the mecca of bodybuilding in Santa Monica. It was there that Zabo blossomed into the Venus-flytrap womankiller with whom at least some of you are familiar. He trained in the same ultra-hardcore basement gym where Steve Merjanian, Chuck Ahrens, and other lifting luminaries of the era trained, and signed on with the ultra-hot cougar Mae West to work in her male review "Something for the Girls." He, Joe Gold, Mr. America and Mr. Universe George Eiferman, Mr. America Armand Tanny, Mr. Universe Mickey Hargitay, and three other Muscle Beach bodybuilders served as male dancers for the revue, accompanied by a male singer and Hattie McDaniel (Mammy in <i>Gone With The Wind</i>) in what was essentially the hottest Vegas act going in the 1950's. As such, Zabo was raking in the loot and made connections that would eventually lead to a brief acting career and to him <u>becoming the fucking Marlboro Man</u> in print ads.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As if the man had not made enough connections by touring with the hottest 60 year old slut on the planet, he got even more hooked into the Hollywood scene when Joe Gold asked him to manage the first strictly bodybuilding gym and a "palace" by comparison to other gyms of the era, Gold's Gym, in 1965 (Roach, <i>Vol. 1</i>). At that point, Zabo was partying his ass off, drinking like a fucking fish and smoking, in Tommy Chong's words "a ton of weed" (Chong). When Tommy Chong says he gets after it partying, you know that you are a pink bitch pussy compared to Zabo Koszewski, </span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">no matter how much you've partied</span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>"Membership is thirty dollars for three months, no instructions, and you can come as many times as you like. Don't leave your shit unlocked and put the weights back when you are finished with them. That's it."</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">With pussy literally falling out of his pockets, Zabo trained fanatically and managed Gold's (and later World's Gym) by day and partied like a fucking animal at night. Though the IPF would likely have slapped him with a lifetime ban just for shaking Tommy Chong's hand, Koszewski was still natty as fuck, and maintained that status throughout his life. Though he talked tough to new members, Zabo was apparently pretty chill at Gold's while nursing what must've been catastrophic hangovers, and he hooked members like Tommy Chong up with basic programs (Chong still uses it to this day) and ran them through the use of equipment to ensure that they didn't kill themselves in the pursuit of maximum jackedness. It was actually through Zabo's chill demeanor and Animal House-esque party habits that formed a bond between himself and Tommy Chong that landed him a couple of movie roles and eventually had Chong working the desk at World Gym after he was released from prison.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">To say say Zabo was a frequent bodybuilding competitor is like saying "Jeff Bezos frequently makes a million dollars." From age 23 to 46, Zabo competed in at least 31 bodybuilding competitions, winning "Best Abs" in every competition that awarded the trophy, and "Most Muscular" in most of the rest. Tragically, winning either of those trophies was like winning an MTV Movie award- it virtually guaranteed that people would take you about as seriously as they take Justin Bieber when it was time to hand out a legitimate award. With his condition at least two decades before its time, Zabo almost always found himself edged out by fuller, less defined competitors. Undeterred by small details like not winning, Zabo forged ahead and collected his "Best Abs" trophies like millennials collect STDs.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Would you fuck me? I'd fuck me."</span></div>
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<u style="font-size: x-large;"><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Zabo Koszewski Competition History</span></b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1947<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. New Jersey<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4th</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1948<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. New Jersey<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1950<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Jr. Mr. Middle Atlantic<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1950<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Middle Atlantic<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1950<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>13th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1950<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>IFBB Mr. Eastern America 3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1951<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Strength and Health 2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1951<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Jr. Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1951<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Eastern America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1952<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Superman<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1952<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Southern California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd (tie)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1952<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1952<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Jr. Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1952<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>4th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1953<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Southern California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1953<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Los Angeles<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1953<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1953<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. Pacific Coast<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1953<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1954<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1954<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Jr. Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1954<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>AAU Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1956<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Pro Mr. USA<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1957<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Mr. USA<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>5th (tie)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1965<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>IFBB Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd (medium)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Mr. International<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st (medium, 2nd overall)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Pro Mr. California<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>IFBB Jr. Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>3rd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>Mr. International<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>1st (medium, 2nd overall)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1967<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>IFBB Mr. America<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>2nd (medium)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1970<span style="white-space: pre;"> </span>IFBB Pro Mr. World 4th (short)</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHehQsNZH6KZYcWqirCYjCaP02DtRftkttH1XbBHxyD4-l5sp94u33d3oDWZ21PalzNSiBZ0VehnfFa9G3MgFrRQVI9zhaK3zBrxgag7kxKr78FYIDt9wgRlNCCnkgG_EJsQr5Ls2ehN0k/s1600/Irving-Zabo-Koshevski.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="250" data-original-width="438" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHehQsNZH6KZYcWqirCYjCaP02DtRftkttH1XbBHxyD4-l5sp94u33d3oDWZ21PalzNSiBZ0VehnfFa9G3MgFrRQVI9zhaK3zBrxgag7kxKr78FYIDt9wgRlNCCnkgG_EJsQr5Ls2ehN0k/s1600/Irving-Zabo-Koshevski.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In spite of his propensity for getting fucked up and banging sluts, Zabo almost never missed workouts. Although I can hardly imagine training hungover for three hours a day in an LA gym with no air conditioning, Zabo took that shit on the chin like the stone-jawed Pride fighter Kazuyuki Fujita ate knees to the face. I guess having survived three combat landings in WW2 would change anyone's perspective about anything as minor as a life-destroying hangover, and he just went into the gym and rocked the fuck out. His insanely high-volume workouts, dense enough to give the internet's natty bros cancer of the AIDS, looked like this:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;"><b><u>Zabo Koszewski Training Routine</u></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Every Day</u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Incline Situps- 1 x 500 (yup, one set of 500 reps)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hanging Leg Raise- 1 x 500</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKzzkXOQ88VlPgveiCz2jZPB9FYR4CwFarAapVAm80o62bUJYYAcp7eQ8WzwGZocZNlhPWLidjeKrYG9cUSUGlRIPTrcDFfoKTR2KgsIjaLUK_rvlLwQF1VTPQtQK9C_QhY1FyIMIchHFA/s1600/zabo+absss.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="491" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjKzzkXOQ88VlPgveiCz2jZPB9FYR4CwFarAapVAm80o62bUJYYAcp7eQ8WzwGZocZNlhPWLidjeKrYG9cUSUGlRIPTrcDFfoKTR2KgsIjaLUK_rvlLwQF1VTPQtQK9C_QhY1FyIMIchHFA/s1600/zabo+absss.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Monday / Wednesday / Friday</u></b></span><br />
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Legs and Back</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squats supersetted with Leg Curls</b> – 8 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hack Squats supersetted with Leg Curls</b> – 2 x 20</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Stiff Leg Dead Lift </b>– 4 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Power Cleans</b> – 4 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chest</span></u></b></span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">(All exercises done as a giant set, which he repeated 7 times)</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Decline Dumbell Press </b>– x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Crossover</b> – x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dips</b> – x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Push Ups</b> – x 25</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Back</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Chins</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cable Rows</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Behind the Neck Pull Downs</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Reverse Cable Laterals</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4V5_n1cp8Fwc-yK6WauzI2QQGNXdEhA4JWe_NX8cBCpuMSaSvuJTYUjHRD24sOThsrkMRIbPMqZnjy2MQlWSCLvbPj6b5bSWKJ5cvQPZWzYK3dYUcLvHW_UX8zrsL_8JyM03Om0kOdtQk/s1600/med_1218775180-zabo12.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="234" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4V5_n1cp8Fwc-yK6WauzI2QQGNXdEhA4JWe_NX8cBCpuMSaSvuJTYUjHRD24sOThsrkMRIbPMqZnjy2MQlWSCLvbPj6b5bSWKJ5cvQPZWzYK3dYUcLvHW_UX8zrsL_8JyM03Om0kOdtQk/s640/med_1218775180-zabo12.jpg" width="374" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Motherfucker literally appeared to be carved out of stone.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Tuesday / Thursday</u></b></span></span><br />
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Shoulders</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Alternating Seated Dumbell Presses</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Laterals</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Seated Behind the Neck Press </b>– 7 x 10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Upright Rows</b> – 7 x 10</span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Arms</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Curls supersetted with Tricep Pushdowns</b> – 20 x 10</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3pcUiwpVolpZ4oVY7_EXjGxc1AJkQv7bNOcQC21BMMVolbSghTq3lq5YrBPqz8ZVgIBpToJ4xm0Qb3NVVKqAseXFHW6_8kl6obwRI8_4t-cZiiz5jW6qSYu4x3AjeysNp0IXgvMAtmf0_/s1600/zabo+fc+asch.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="600" data-original-width="630" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3pcUiwpVolpZ4oVY7_EXjGxc1AJkQv7bNOcQC21BMMVolbSghTq3lq5YrBPqz8ZVgIBpToJ4xm0Qb3NVVKqAseXFHW6_8kl6obwRI8_4t-cZiiz5jW6qSYu4x3AjeysNp0IXgvMAtmf0_/s1600/zabo+fc+asch.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Zabo (who's at least 50 in this pic, ripped to fucking bits), Arnold, and Franco used to party at Don Peters' "party palace", a mansion owned by James "Dr. Strangelove" Larsen. Larsen encouraged Don Peters to invite over all of the bodybuilders he could fit into the house for workouts and parties... which he would watch while locked in the closet in the spare bedroom from behind the 18" by 18" two way mirror he had installed specially for that purpose (Roach, <i style="text-align: left;">Vol. 2</i>). That's good old fashioned fun right there.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This, however, appears to be a motel pool. I just wanted to shoehorn that story in.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Sunday</u></b></span><br />
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Fuck Around Day</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Generally, he’d head to the beach and swim, or play a sport.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For anyone familiar with Vince Gironda's programming and diet, Zabo seems to have followed both with the kind of obsessive devotion generally reserved for stalkers and 24/7 TPE slaves. Zabo ate only two meals a day, both of which consisted of fruits, vegetables, lean meat (especially hamburger), eggs, apple juice, coffee, and milk, and he trained six days a week with what amounted to German Volume training, just as Gironda recommended. Though he would cut all dairy just before a show to achieve paper-thin skin leanness, Zabo was also a huge fan of Rheo H. Blair's protein powder, which Gironda advocated with the kind of vociferousness most chatty people in clubs reserve for cocaine. </span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr8xI1HEYZBG9byGtWcMCSNoluVXxsYxDz1aqYsAQuRTpB61iq0iwczxH_6PsoWpa8suGU6m3DhwljtfwY-8gynJPx2RTCfCLUX1bV6KMnEFmhJgZwDpEsen4P12U_w7OqtGo4Gc-WPml2/s1600/blairs_protein.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="415" data-original-width="276" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhr8xI1HEYZBG9byGtWcMCSNoluVXxsYxDz1aqYsAQuRTpB61iq0iwczxH_6PsoWpa8suGU6m3DhwljtfwY-8gynJPx2RTCfCLUX1bV6KMnEFmhJgZwDpEsen4P12U_w7OqtGo4Gc-WPml2/s1600/blairs_protein.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Blair’s protein was crazy advanced for its time, as the only other protein on the market was horrific-tasting soy dogshit, and consisted of casein, egg white protein, and dried whole eggs. It came only in vanilla, was sweetened with cyclamate to keep the carbs down (though apparently it was nearly as carcinogenic as plutonium), and contained 102 calories, 17.5 grams of protein, 7 grams or carbohydrate and 0.6 grams of fat per scoop (Heffernan). Blair recommended (as did Gironda), that people take two scoops of protein with eight ounces of cream and eight ounces of milk, which then yielded a whopping 949 calories, 55g protein, 35g carbs, and 62g fat per shake, and that lifters drink three of those shakes a day (so Zabo was getting ~3000 calories a day before he even cut into his first steak of the day). As with every other lifter from this era, Zabo got the fuck after it calorie-wise, even though he was natty as fuck. Therefore, if you are one of those natty bros who constantly claims you can't eat that much or you'll get fat, consider this- you're doing it wrong. And by "it" I mean "literally everything."</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVJzEosxVIEmlYuWNyeA8pWcPSAnyITSI86NfG2V5A91s9bHZbsVBLKtJU6NEeVAYj-kUoSI37wzjyBMnsq5QzXIG9Hvs7vxtzcBX_uYFeI4xPschroaxzYjDezyI5eEMBdC2vWsBIS2lr/s1600/giphy+%25288%2529.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="275" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVJzEosxVIEmlYuWNyeA8pWcPSAnyITSI86NfG2V5A91s9bHZbsVBLKtJU6NEeVAYj-kUoSI37wzjyBMnsq5QzXIG9Hvs7vxtzcBX_uYFeI4xPschroaxzYjDezyI5eEMBdC2vWsBIS2lr/s1600/giphy+%25288%2529.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For instance, if your bedroom doesn't occasionally look like this, you're doing it wrong.</span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Speaking of doing it wrong, it seems like the lot of us are doing it wrong when it comes to abs. As I mentioned, Zabo never lost a "Best Abs" award. Interestingly, his ab routine was developed out of necessity- when doctors told him only surgery would repair a hernia, he said fuck that and just started training abs like his life depended on it. Perhaps his life didn't but his guts seemed to depend on it if he didn't want his insides outside his body. </span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"I knew that it would be wise for me to "make haste slowly" so my first ab routine consisted of just two exercises: Situps and Leg Raises. Although I could only manage a few reps that first training day, I soon had worked up to the point where 500 Situps and 500 Leg Raises were just warmups for my more advanced training routines every day." </span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"To bring out clear-cut abdominals you must do two things:</span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">1.) Burn away all midsection fat that is on the outside, and that which lurks between the muscles . . . the fat you can't see, but causes you too look too smooth and too large in the abdominal region.</span> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">2.) You must continually work for muscularity of the abdominals, and that requires daily diligence. Yes, you don't exercise your abs with a split routine . . . but with an everyday workout with specialized abdominal exercises" (Koszewski).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsKaiC0YU_tKP2RKRUzH3xh8UFF2fH14HswXbAGFdRuGNJpm0DsDT1h6nxT1SXjLwDufmcyDkMVygKTsp-xbLcXvRcYIgXxYCNN_b66uwLUbxlm9GPhTYamtlRZ-TtN8VoSBHWRgqbnE6u/s1600/91ff7507e7e1bc450e3ce35614158ba8.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="829" data-original-width="564" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgsKaiC0YU_tKP2RKRUzH3xh8UFF2fH14HswXbAGFdRuGNJpm0DsDT1h6nxT1SXjLwDufmcyDkMVygKTsp-xbLcXvRcYIgXxYCNN_b66uwLUbxlm9GPhTYamtlRZ-TtN8VoSBHWRgqbnE6u/s1600/91ff7507e7e1bc450e3ce35614158ba8.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I won't go into the details of all that Zabo recommended for abs (it's linked in the sources if you're curious), because it's easily summed up with "all of the things." Basically, he recommended every permutation of situps, levers, and leg raises ever invented, and had this to say about sets and reps:</span></span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Work up to 10 sets of Situps and work up to at least a total of 500 reps. Work up to 10 sets of Leg Raises and work as many reps per set as your pull against gravity will allow. But don't throw, thrust, or maneuver the body by 'assisting' with other muscles. Make the upper abs do the work in Situps; make the lower abs do the work in Leg Raises."</span></blockquote>
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"After each workout practice mirror posing for 15 minutes, contracting first the rectus - then the intercostals, trying to squeeze extra definition from each posing session. This will add interest to your abdominal workouts, and give you valuable posing experience and control" (Koszewski).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Simple enough- bust your fucking ass harder than a drunken retard in a <i>Jackass</i> film and be lean as shit. Though it's in vogue to seek out some panacea involving a highly complicated system to achieve a simple goal, Zabo is here to show you all of the nonsense of which you might be thinking to rebut this statement is just that- nonsense. The man was Occam's Razor personified- simple and brutal is far more effective than overly complex. If it takes longer to explain than it does to do, you're likely fucking up your lifting in every imaginable way.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgov9n5bidv-qZnxzUdtjh7OkLQW8PN1K7NRYNmVypk0PLeJB41LvScts1DWX48HVotxct7cFvKNeI56J3JZsJNoLx87nGGrdagB0WDTu_9EgpT_Sk1SorsLncYABkIvmWssOMSS4dE72Fi/s1600/2a0c47ba41064d2393552aa9a7a3aa77.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="594" data-original-width="525" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgov9n5bidv-qZnxzUdtjh7OkLQW8PN1K7NRYNmVypk0PLeJB41LvScts1DWX48HVotxct7cFvKNeI56J3JZsJNoLx87nGGrdagB0WDTu_9EgpT_Sk1SorsLncYABkIvmWssOMSS4dE72Fi/s1600/2a0c47ba41064d2393552aa9a7a3aa77.png" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">My man would have made loot off flashing abs on IG and YouTube if he'd been born 70 years later.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In case you're curious as to how far in life a sick set of abs and a love of partying can get you, it seems it can take you pretty fucking far. A far cry from the cycle-your-coffee-intake-and-don't-fuck-sluts-or-stay-out-late-or-smoke-weed-or-get-hammered attitudes that are seemingly so prevalent in today's ABSOLUTELY NO FUCKING FUN ZONE lifting zeitgeist, Zabo made that shit work, and he lived a life worth talking about. Here's a list of the ways my vote for the Most Interesting Man In The World is immortalized in celluloid:</span></span><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1xvaXihnQGw5ELuWln_8fJB_vn0jc80Fe9VDAmDmZlaO8J1z1t5oHfogw3iQhwpWaiFHIZJtWrpoqMgnT8muvjj1lBv-iwVVAcTuJZ-z78x_ZYvSHem4NlIjqehQm4DYPJHAfli_90sjm/s1600/SEYMOUR+-+ZABO+-+JERRY+TRAILER+-+STEVE+MERJANIAN.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="451" data-original-width="720" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1xvaXihnQGw5ELuWln_8fJB_vn0jc80Fe9VDAmDmZlaO8J1z1t5oHfogw3iQhwpWaiFHIZJtWrpoqMgnT8muvjj1lBv-iwVVAcTuJZ-z78x_ZYvSHem4NlIjqehQm4DYPJHAfli_90sjm/s640/SEYMOUR+-+ZABO+-+JERRY+TRAILER+-+STEVE+MERJANIAN.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The "Muscle Apes"- Seymour Koenig, Zabo Koszewski, Jerry Trayler, and Steve Merjanian.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Zabo Flexin' Abs On The Big Screen</u></b></span><br />
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<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">was Tommy Chong's stunt double in <i>Things Are Tough All Over</i> (1982)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played Body Builder #1 alongside [Body by] Jake Steinfeld in the Cheech and Chong flick <i>Nice Dreams</i> (1981)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played a gorilla in <i>Planet of the Apes </i>(1968) </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played a football player alongside Shirley MacLaine in <i>John Goldfarb, Please Come Home! </i>(1965) </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played a soldier alongside Kirk Douglas and Laurence Olivier in <i>Spartacus</i> (1960)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played a contestant in Debbie Reynold's <i>Athena</i> (1954)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">was himself, as runner up Mr. America, in Groucho Marx's <i>You Bet Your Life</i> (1959)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">worked on the TV shows <i>Combat!</i> and <i>Star Trek</i></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">And there you have it- in stark contrast to the aforementioned four 1950's lifters, Zabo didn't believe in getting fat to be strong, but he definitely followed the same path of frequent, brutal workouts, tons of calories, and not being a boring pile of shit. Zabo loved lifting and the beach so much that people joked he wouldn't go more than three blocks inland, and his love of lifting and life translated into being a fucking badass inside and outside the gym. Instead of robotically trudging his way through life, Zabo grabbed life by the throat and fucked it half to death... and then left a good looking corpse behind. So if you learn anything from the man, learn to live this shit, not just fucking talk about it on the internet- your life will be all that much better for it.... and for the love of all that's unholy, fucking eat something.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">"The best way to never worry about getting into shape is to never get out of shape." </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- Zabo</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chong, Tommy. <i>Cheech and Chong: The Unauthorized Autobiography.</i> New York: Simon Spotlight Entertainment, 2008.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Freese, Gene Scott. <i>Hollywood Stunt Performers, 1910s–1970s: A Biographical Dictionary, 2d ed</i>. Jefferson: McFarland and Company, Inc. 2014.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hart, Hugh. He's just pressing on. Los Angeles Times. 20 Feb 2005. Web. 27 May 2018. <a href="http://articles.latimes.com/2005/feb/20/entertainment/ca-chong20">http://articles.latimes.com/2005/feb/20/entertainment/ca-chong20</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Heffernan, Conor. The secret of Rheo H. Blair's protein powder. Physical Culture Study. 22 Jun 2016. Web. 28 May 2018. <a href="https://physicalculturestudy.com/2016/06/22/the-secret-of-rheo-h-blairs-protein-powder/">https://physicalculturestudy.com/2016/06/22/the-secret-of-rheo-h-blairs-protein-powder/</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Hise, Bob. The Fabulous Zabo Koszewski. Strength and Health. Aug 1967. Web.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">9 Feb 2013. <a href="http://www.musclememory.com/showArticle.php?sh670820">http://www.musclememory.com/showArticle.php?sh670820</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Juliano, Dominick. <i>The Essence of Being</i>. Bloomington: Balboa Press, 2015.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Kelemen, Matt. Q and A: Tommy Chong. Las Vegas Magazine. 17 Jun 2016. Web. 27 May 2018. <a href="https://lasvegasmagazine.com/interviews/qa/2016/jun/17/qa-tommy-chong-treasure-island-las-vegas-strip/#/0">https://lasvegasmagazine.com/interviews/qa/2016/jun/17/qa-tommy-chong-treasure-island-las-vegas-strip/#/0</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Koszewski, Zabo. Developing your abdominals. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 8 Jan 2018. Web. 27 May 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2018/01/developing-your-abdominals-zabo.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2018/01/developing-your-abdominals-zabo.html</a></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Roach, Randy. <i>Muscle, Smoke, and Mirrors, Volume 1</i>. Bloomington: AuthorHouse, 2008.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Roach, Randy. <i>Muscle, Smoke, and Mirrors, Volume 2</i>. Bloomington: AuthorHouse, 2011.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Thurber, John. Irvin 'Zabo' Koszewski dies at 84; bodybuilder renowned for his</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">abs. LA Times. 2 May 2009. Web. 9 Feb 2013.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="http://www.latimes.com/local/obituaries/la-me-zabo-koszewski2-2009may02-story.html">http://www.latimes.com/local/obituaries/la-me-zabo-koszewski2-2009may02-story.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Yarnell, Dave. <i>Forgotten Secrets of the Culver City Westside Barbell Club Revealed</i>. Lexington: Self Published, 2014. </span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com37tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-55528443434570276882018-05-27T11:23:00.000-04:002018-05-27T20:12:26.084-04:00Who The Fuck Says You Have To Squat? Steve Merjanian, His 500lb Incline Bench, And Why You Don't Have To Squat To Get Huge <div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If the cannibalistic weightlifting community in <i>The Bad Batch</i> isn't the closest cinematic thing to Valhalla ever, I will eat my goddamned laptop. Die Antwoord, jacked people, and human barbecues going 24/7? Count me the fuck <i>in</i>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the interest of stemming the tide of disinformation that is so prevalent on the internet today, I decided to highlight yet another mammoth of the past who reminds us that there is a better way than what most of us are doing, and that way is as jacked and strong as humanly fucking possible and enjoying lifting, rather than lean and rigidly locked into some stupid fucking program. Lest you think I am sitting astride some long legged horse handing down life lessons and tossing you apples from the tree of knowledge like some dwarvish version of Odin, that's not the case- I do, however, have a hell of a lot of experience under my belt, and I have a pretty good idea of what works and what doesn't. If message boards, Instagram, and Reddit are any indication, most of you motherfuckers are wallowing in a pit of despair and don't even know it, because you're all drowning in weakness together. I'll admit, however, that writing shit like this gets me fired the fuck up as well, however, so I figure we might as well all get jacked as fuck so that when the collapse of Western civilization hits us in a wave of Christian fundamentalism and wild-eyed anarcho-collectivist horseshit, we lot can simply waddle around and rip people in half with our bare hands. And then eat them. And thus gain whatever paltry power they had and grow even bigger and stronger, living in one gigantic happy cannibalistic weightlifting community like The movie <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tqsb_ACTX3Q" target="_blank">The Bad Batch</a>.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzJTfaYuHoE4KwVBINvD35MHvMxcx5PyYEFFTsxyOjmwfCekFy_8KAR0uxcwv5DYtyNjCqRJipTklsGJgf1PkirImpSOCtDGoGInMO9YRtkMc2RNLmPsP_eSmpQaigGt8APjw55MtP7RXp/s1600/Steve+Merj+back.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="502" data-original-width="656" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzJTfaYuHoE4KwVBINvD35MHvMxcx5PyYEFFTsxyOjmwfCekFy_8KAR0uxcwv5DYtyNjCqRJipTklsGJgf1PkirImpSOCtDGoGInMO9YRtkMc2RNLmPsP_eSmpQaigGt8APjw55MtP7RXp/s1600/Steve+Merj+back.png" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Circa 1964 back width.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Knowing how the minds of the people who read about training work, writing about four upper body specialists who regarded the squat in the same way most people regard having gypsies in their house unattended back to back might have the lot of you thinking I have turned my back on the exercise that brought me to the pinnacle of the 181 class in powerlifting. Rest easy- I've hardly stopped squatting, and unless you just want to bulk to mammoth proportions and rock 22 inch arms and unequal lower body development, I don't advocate dropping it from your program altogether. What I have advocated long and hard, however, is focusing on what you love and hammering it like it's a five dollar prostitute right before you head back to the front. Hammer that motherfucker like you're playing Whack-A-Mole on speed, and anyone who has something to say about it can get fucked. There is far too much lifting for the sake of other people going on these days, and too many people are going through the motions of workouts they appear to hate because they want the cache associated with doing a certain program, and too many people approaching lifting like work rather than fun. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I couldn't find a pic of Richard Kee, but with pecs like that, this broad has to have a huge bench.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The colossuses of the 1950s and 1960s didn't give a flying fuck what anyone thought about their workouts- they did what they liked, and because they liked it, they were fucking monsters. The guy with what Weider writers would undoubtedly refer to as a "barn door back" pictured above was just one of those people. Steve Merjanian was actually a training partner of the last upper body specialist I profiled, Chuck Ahrens, and the two of them trained with another 500+lb bencher, Richard Kee, so hard that none of us even seem to lift by comparison. These 300lb beasts stomped around the Bruce Conner gym in Westwood, California handing weights unthinkable in most gyms today on equipment that was as rickety and homemade as it was effective. Zero fucks were given- they trained often and they trained heavy, and they had the physiques and lifts that belied their efforts. They rarely, if ever, entered contests because that's not what they were about- they were about having a good time, heaving weights around, and throwing up double bis that would melt the underpants off anyone nearby if they didn't just blow straight off from shock and awe. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">They might have eschewed powerlifting meets for being the boring piles of shit they are, but Steve and the rest of the Gold's gym team (the hilariously filthily named "Gold Ropers") would turn up for a tug ' war competition, and as you'd guess, they fucking trashed everyone. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">What's this you say? Panties blew off and the man didn't scamper about in the gym wearing fucking tights and endlessly blabbering on about Smolov? Well then, he must have done Sheiko? How about neither, and he was content with running a mile in the sand and doing calves for his legs. Every now and again he'd bust a half squat just for shits and giggles, but Steve Merjanian was not about that life- he just loved training heavy and loved being strong. Even at age 44, he was still hitting 405 for a behind the neck press, which is an age and a number so inconceivable to the average message board goer these days I'm sure they're screaming bullshit at their screen and hypergraphically scribbling "STEROIDS" on the wall in crayon. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Steve and Zabo Koszewski fucking around with Joe Gold. In banana hammocks. The 60's were a much different time.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Unlike the three preceding 300lb monsters, Merjanian's success didn't come overnight- he broke his ass day in and day out for fifteen years, first as a bodybuilder and then a powerbuilder, to build up to the massive poundages he ended up moving at his peak. Perseverance and harder work than a Thai ladyboi at a NAMBLA convention definitely paid off better than George Soros shorting the dollar in an engineered recession, and Marjarian became one of the strongest upper body specialists to ever live. Those two bizarre similes notwithstanding, here are Merjanian's stats:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Steve Merjanian's Vital Stats</u></b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Born: </b>29 Jul 1935 (82 years old)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Height</b>: 5'11"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Weight</b>: 280-300lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Chest</b>: 59.75"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Neck</b>: 21+"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Waist</b>: 39"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Arms</b>: 20.25"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Forearms</b>: 18.5"</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Thighs</b>: 28.5"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Calves</b>: 19.5"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Doug Hepburn, Ronnie Ray, Chuck Ahrens, Paul Anderson, Marvin Eder, Mel Hennessy, John Molinaro, Bill Seno. Chuck Sipes, Steve Merjanian, Bruno Sammartino, Karl Norberg, Jim Williams, Bud Ravenscroft. Pat Neve, Jon Cole, Tom Hardman, John Kuc, Bill Kazmaier, Joe Bradley, James Roude, Jeff Magruder, Mike Bridges, Lee Moran, Ted Arcidi, and Mike MacDonald are the great men in history. Bev Francis is the great woman."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"What about Roosevelt, Salk, Einstein, Kennedy, Ghandi, and Lincoln? A bunch of nothings with low benches (although Abe Lincoln benched 325 for a double and you have to admit he did have a long way to push the sucker)."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"<b>The only way to remedy this national malady is to start now and GET YOUR BENCH UP.</b>" </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">- Jeff Everson</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u><b>Steve Merjanian's Best Lifts</b></u></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Bench Press</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b> (40</b></span><b>° Angle)</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">– </span>500lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Flat Bench Press<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> </span></b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">– 560bs (touch and go)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Press Behind Neck</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b> </b>– 405lbs; </span>335lbs x 7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Overhead Press</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> – </span>190lb dumbbells x 2 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Lateral Raise</b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b> </b>– </span>165 lb dumbbell x 1</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lateral Raise</b> – 125lb dumbbells x 2, 100 x 4</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Half Squat</b> – 850lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Unlike the aforementioned leviathans of late 50's/early 60's Muscle Beach, Steve Merjanian didn't eat like he was recently released from a North Korean prison camp four times a day. Instead, his diet consisted mostly of meat, eggs, and (interestingly) fruit juice in massive quantities. Nor was he a GOMAD guy- he never seemed to drink the stuff, and had little interest in the supplements of the day (which were appalling tasting and remarkably primitive) beyond multi-vitamins. Nope- big Steve was content eating a couple of breakfasts, a few sandwiches mid-morning, an early afternoon salad, and a dinner consisting primarily of massive amounts of some form of dead animal. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Single greatest outfit ever.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If his diet looks like he rode a brontosaurus to work, his training looked like he rode to the gym in a chariot pulled by velociraptors on meth. Every week big Steve maxed on everything he felt like maxing on... though that thing was almost never the back squat. Merjanian hated squatting, preferring instead to just run a mile a day through the sand four times a week and warm up with a 400 yard beach run before every workout. Although I've only got the details of one of his workout styles, Merjanian had two basic routines. One consisted of 10-12 sets of an exercise, the last five of which were singles with roughly 95% 1RM. His other type of routine was 8 sets of 5, as heavier than a Crowbar concert after an all you can eat buffet. The only thing Merjanian did with getting a pump in mind was back- he did lots of sets and lots of reps emphasizing a serious squeeze and brutal stretch to force as much blood into the muscle as possible. Whatever he did, however, it was hardly flexible and never a rigidly structured program- he just went as hard as he felt like and blasted weights like they were some broad's face in a bukkake film.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u><b>Steve Merjanian's Typical Routine</b></u></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><u><b>Monday / Wednesday / Friday</b></u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Press</b> – 5x7 </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Laterals</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Front Dumbbell Raises</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pulley Rowing Motion</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Curl</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dips</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lying Triceps Extension</b> – 5x7</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>60 Degree Incline Press</b> – 10x7 reps, 7x1 using 20 lbs. less than max (Brace yourself for this news- his first warmup was 350 x 10)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> – 5x7</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz5nxr5NlCgScjd-hnOdUl-a-eHMZgqMi91o0u_NMUX1ONLfLxgVsF9oyR3rLgUiiVSlrxUWCp77EIV2LyN1sK9-5BgMov-2ix17twb3GSKzFCIAipitG9TomKSC0cZCf1zEfFh909WNA7/s1600/steve+m.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="670" data-original-width="798" height="268" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhz5nxr5NlCgScjd-hnOdUl-a-eHMZgqMi91o0u_NMUX1ONLfLxgVsF9oyR3rLgUiiVSlrxUWCp77EIV2LyN1sK9-5BgMov-2ix17twb3GSKzFCIAipitG9TomKSC0cZCf1zEfFh909WNA7/s320/steve+m.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><u><b>Tuesday / Thursday / Saturday / Sunday</b></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Calf Raise </b>– 10-15 x10 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Pulley Forearm Curl </b>– 10-15x10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Face Pulls </b>– 10-15x10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Standing Triceps Extension </b>– 10-15x10</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Running </b>– approximately one mile in the sand</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizZDNcd3b1ZTmmHX3kz6uRMxc7OHwFSdbNd3mciKXNcpbfLUSaXRYXTGmd9HV41MyBwFlzZKozZV6Uxkd4LSVE51pQ-dQHm0W-AEOVNkm2VRQsYI9FhJvep76lMK-zjkAMbj5D8X1sJubx/s1600/movies_inspire_bodybuilders_g.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="296" data-original-width="438" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEizZDNcd3b1ZTmmHX3kz6uRMxc7OHwFSdbNd3mciKXNcpbfLUSaXRYXTGmd9HV41MyBwFlzZKozZV6Uxkd4LSVE51pQ-dQHm0W-AEOVNkm2VRQsYI9FhJvep76lMK-zjkAMbj5D8X1sJubx/s1600/movies_inspire_bodybuilders_g.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Big Steve with Arnold, Reg Park, Ric Drasin (bodybuilder/wrestler/author/actor), Chuck Faust (bodybuilder), Jim Morris (Mr. America), and a couple players from the Los Angeles Rams shooting a commercial for the hot-enough-to-burn-your-retinas <a href="http://i448.photobucket.com/albums/qq201/pinstr4car/June%2016/6-24%2072%20Heavy%20Chevy%20Black/17.jpg" target="_blank">Heavy Chevy</a>.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Word is Steve trained legs early on in his lifting career but abandoned them for one reason or another as he got huge. It didn't seem to negatively impact his lifts, however, and his leg strength was pretty serious in spite of his disdain for training them. He was known to occasionally jump in on legs out of curiosity, and would pull off shit like banging out a set of five easy reps with 315 in the front squat as a goof, or a single with no warmup, and his legs were always strong enough to allow him to hang with the guys who treated the front squat like it was going to reveal the meaning of life to them. In fact, big Steve's legs were so strong that he would occasionally jump from a standing start onto what had to have been the stoutest ping pong table in the history of the sport to fuck with anyone who said "gigantic white men can't jump" and to just scare the shit out of unruly teenagers. It was his shoulder, chest, and tricep strength that was the fucking show stopper, though. He'd do cheating lateral raises with the 144lb dumbbells and a standing triceps extension with a ridiculous 275lbs, but both of those paled in comparison to his gargantuan 405lb behind the neck press.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Presses behind the neck were usually done sitting on a flat bench, ducking your head under the bar and lifting it clear of the rack on the back of your shoulders, pressing it overhead and then lowering it to your shoulders and returning it to the rack. A man who could do three hundred in this manner was considered strong. I reckon there are a lot of the guys that do (or claim to do) four hundred or more in the current style (overhead liftoff, bringing the bar down to the top of the head & pressing it up) would be unable to do three hundred in this manner" (Neece). </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The amount of camaraderie the lifters in Muscle Beach, and particularly at Gold's, enjoyed in that time period would make the Care Bears look like a bunch of backbiting, foam rolling, shit talking, natty powerlifters by comparison- these dudes not only lifted together, but they formed a sort of informal Guardian's Angels of jacked dudes to scrap with young ruffians on the beach when they'd get out of hand, and they all participated in goofy shit like tug-of-war competitions on the weekends. And these weren't nobodies, either- were talking pro baseball players, NFL players, epic strongmen, actors, at least one Olympic silver medalist, and even the vice principal of a local high school (Neece). Given that most "serious" strength gyms these days are populated by people who would be harder to wrangle than wet cats, and would assent to heading in the same direction with far more yowling and general disaffection than those cats, the fact that everyone was so willing to chip in and help out in the community should illustrate exactly how tragic the modern era is. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqWv_Mn3Y07cBLxIfCzXMWpaJ6SsHjCrlgo8GEFhEOyDjX9mZnF_LEVE5waDQo2Ng1yS-3L_ycN42Cyi-S9upC_pt1noOOjbDtkVeKzLX0gt1eKsVqlaxCngB1xNS27_7CLFSkc6IZ9IRQ/s1600/joe+gold.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="606" data-original-width="466" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqWv_Mn3Y07cBLxIfCzXMWpaJ6SsHjCrlgo8GEFhEOyDjX9mZnF_LEVE5waDQo2Ng1yS-3L_ycN42Cyi-S9upC_pt1noOOjbDtkVeKzLX0gt1eKsVqlaxCngB1xNS27_7CLFSkc6IZ9IRQ/s1600/joe+gold.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I'm starting to wonder if big Steve even owned a pair of fucking pants. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It's even more poignant when you consider that Gold's Gym in 1968 boasted three monsters "who were over four hundred on the incline: Steve, myself, and a man named Joe Kanaster, about whom I will tell you later. There were several others in the 375-400 range, there were others who had gone over four hundred in the past but no longer trained there and a couple of others who would hit four hundred or more at a later date" (Neece). Having three guys benching over 400 on the incline in a single gym in a single year is like having three guys in the same gym who own multiple Lambos and call their hot-ass slut of a girlfriend "Concubine," or having three chicks in the gym so hot you can't even look directly at them who shit Froot Loops on demand. It's like opening your closet and having six masturbating leprechauns jump out, and then telling your friend about it and him saying the same thing happened to him last week. Winning the Powerball three months in a row is less likely, and yet, that was what was happening in Gold's Venice in 1968.</span></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigInRgMV-VcGrdqsDemgzC-CwxQny8L5YJ7LtTRW80py0SQ2lzmzdTCLAIZzrrO0DjG56qAx728zdILovobkWIpbMQbyVEqnmlx1u493kAiXXMJt_kirZW9N5o-0GpMl3OH7VxXRveY7S6/s1600/Screenshot+2018-05-27+at+10.38.57+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="550" data-original-width="935" height="376" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigInRgMV-VcGrdqsDemgzC-CwxQny8L5YJ7LtTRW80py0SQ2lzmzdTCLAIZzrrO0DjG56qAx728zdILovobkWIpbMQbyVEqnmlx1u493kAiXXMJt_kirZW9N5o-0GpMl3OH7VxXRveY7S6/s640/Screenshot+2018-05-27+at+10.38.57+AM.png" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://www.instagram.com/teamsalamone/?hl=en" target="_blank">Bryan Salamone is living the fucking life</a>... and I was not kidding- that broad calls herself "Conc."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Looking a little closer, for those of you who are like me and yearning for yesteryear, it wasn't all blowjobs and cheesecake then either, because powerlifting. There was a small faction of very early powerlifters led by Bill "Peanuts" West who resented the fuck out of big Steve's pressing power and the fact that he gave less fucks about powerlifting than most people do about Olympic curling. They employed various schemes to punk Merjanian, but in the end like the lifting efforts of channers, they were ultimately fruitless.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">"</span>It is my opinion that Peanuts resented Steve’ not competing in the three powerlifts and only occasionally training at his (Peanuts’) garage. Peanuts thought of himself as one of the founders of the sport and he was very zealous in his efforts to get everybody involved in what he probably considered to be at least partly his creation. Steve, however, marched to his own drummer and had no interest in the three lifts. In addition, he <b>liked to enjoy life</b> and only trained when he felt like it" [Emphasis mine]. </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Peanuts used to needle Pat about Steve’s inclines and one day in 1967 just before he retired Pat decided to settle it once and for all. It was at Peanut’s garage and George Frenn wrote about it in Weider’s magazine. Someone also took a picture of Pat inclining 515. Peanuts and his bunch told Steve that he had been dethroned However, looking at the photo I could tell they were using an angle of about thirty degrees, or eight to ten degrees less than the angle on the bench Steve and the Gold’s/Venice/Muscle Beach crew used" (Neece). </span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLjMNL0435_6qDjnT-v9AZ3myjBcVGi94uJnErRv5QxCiyx7IYEjbI3Xyqn9gcyqXw2tp1Ja1S7zz5yqHTYSZq9zZswsxNVGCMJ1ajT-MXx7FsuYRBVS1Cf0k93U3UPrXYbSAcreI-Hnmg/s1600/Steve+Merjanian+Monkees.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1080" data-original-width="1440" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjLjMNL0435_6qDjnT-v9AZ3myjBcVGi94uJnErRv5QxCiyx7IYEjbI3Xyqn9gcyqXw2tp1Ja1S7zz5yqHTYSZq9zZswsxNVGCMJ1ajT-MXx7FsuYRBVS1Cf0k93U3UPrXYbSAcreI-Hnmg/s640/Steve+Merjanian+Monkees.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">For those among you still freaking the fuck out that this is now the third consecutive person about whom I've written who was at or over 300lbs, jacked in ways most people on treat their dicks, and strong as a fucking ox, yet rarely if ever trained legs, guess what? Hollywood doesn't care if you squat ass-to-grass, and in fact probably prefers half squatters over the "my asshole was itchy so I back squatted and worked out that itch in the hole on the floor, don't mind the stain" fuckers because ATG squatters never shut the fuck up about depth, and you've got to be the most annoying people on the planet with whom to party. Anyway, here's big Steve's filmography, proving once more the USAPL/IPF knows nothing about anything and the fact you rub your asshole on the floor when squatting means nothing, because none of those humorless asshats have had a speaking role on the <i>Monkees</i> or in a Jackie Chan movie.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><u><b>Steve Merjanian Filmography</b></u></span></span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played Abdul alongside Davy Jones in <i>The Monkees,</i> Season 2, Episode 3 (1967)- "Everywhere a Sheik, Sheik"</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played The Moroccan alongside Jackie Chan in <i>The Big Brawl </i><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">(1980)</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">played Tug the muscle man alongside Frankie Avalon and Annette Funicello in <i>Muscle Beach Party</i></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">was a stuntman in the first <i>Planet of the Apes </i>film</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The "Muscle Apes"- Seymour Koenig, Zabo Koszewski, Jerry Trayler, and Steve Merjanian.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">So there you have it- Steve Merjanian in a nutshell. A bloody great big nutshell. So big he should be one of the 8 Natural Wonders of the World, stronger than a couple of oxen cybernetically attached <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PMUQ2IMuz8o" target="_blank">Frankenstein's Army</a>-style, and chill as fuck, though ready to scrap for fun on the weekends. Still training daily at the age of 65, Steve kept with it because "enjoyed training and being strong but he enjoyed life as much or more," and in spite of the fact that he was a fucking monster, he had a sense of humor about himself and training most people could stand to emulate. In short, Steve Merjanian was the fucking man, and the lot of us can learn a great deal from following his example.</span><br />
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I haven't fact checked this video, so I can't attest to its accuracy, but since I know everyone loves watching videos (and for fuck's sake please stop sending me lifting videos- I would rather watch paint dry), here's an extraordinarily slowly narrated video (Steven Wright sounds like a high school girl on coke compared to whoever narrated this fucking thing) about Steve Merjanian:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"Plenty of rest and relaxation, a mind free of worry, good food and regular training. I agree, and feel that although Steve Merjanian does not hold titles or records that others have, a lot can be learned from his approach to training for maximum progress and fulfilling one’s potential" (Shaw). </span></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>A postscript</b>: It has recently come to my attention that certain IPF/USAPL autists (some of whom weirdly stalked my ex and I in a wild-eyed and generally disordered mishmash of manlet comments and closeted homosexuality) have taken issue with my jokes regarding IPF/USAPL lifters' bizarre lack of a sense of humor and general pomposity. Apparently they fail to realize that in doing so, they have simply proved my point, and it should shock no one that they love 4chan, which as we all know is the repository for all of the collective intelligence of the human race, and is no way a pack of sexless pussies who can neither lift nor fight shit. Therefore, I would like to post a retraction of my previous statements and offer my sincere apologies for wounding their extremely sensitive, micropenised, skinny-fat, man-tittied, sexually confused inner children. </span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>The IPF is filled with Carrot Tops dripping with hilarity and swoleness. We should all bow at the altar of nattiness and strive to attain their laudable estrogenicity and inflated sense of self worth. </b></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>ALL HAIL THE IPF/USAPL! </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Sources:</b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Neece, S. Some lesser known strongmen of the Fifties and Sixties. Iron Game History. 1998 May; 5(1):16-25.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Shaw, Dave. Steve Merjanian. Rpt. in <i>Forgotten Secrets of the Culver City Westside Barbell Club Revealed.</i> By Dave Yarnell. Lexington: Self Published, 2014.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Weaver, Vern. Meet "Powerhouse" Steve Merjanian. The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 21 Oct 2017. Web. 21 May 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/steve-merjanian-vern-weaver-1965.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2017/10/steve-merjanian-vern-weaver-1965.html</a></span><br />
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com34tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-63198182526429363522018-05-21T15:11:00.001-04:002018-05-22T12:56:47.208-04:00Behold The Mighty Chuck Ahrens, Whose Corpse Takes Brobdingnagian Shits On Your Histrionic Personality Disorder<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl4h8cjsrvaC71ZhxsghJfh1lhbJp_H73Xh_juE9QNgkrpV0NBKsWMl39DyF2Z_6ViqlsOfpwpDjUWLE6wgrMJJ6_mo4QozX_OY6Mpssh_dDc8oIjUAz5XxOIy-oJZmGZgV7dqOFFiaPqJ/s1600/ca_db_p.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="302" data-original-width="336" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjl4h8cjsrvaC71ZhxsghJfh1lhbJp_H73Xh_juE9QNgkrpV0NBKsWMl39DyF2Z_6ViqlsOfpwpDjUWLE6wgrMJJ6_mo4QozX_OY6Mpssh_dDc8oIjUAz5XxOIy-oJZmGZgV7dqOFFiaPqJ/s1600/ca_db_p.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Perhaps the most unfairly maligned motherfucker in the history of the strength world was a man who would have undoubtedly despised me- Chuck Ahrens. Known as the strength world's "Mystery Man", Chuck Ahrens shied from the spotlight, the camera, and competition to the point where he was only photographed once in a t-shirt. From what I'd assume was his Christian belief system, Ahrens eschewed all of that shit, preferring instead to perform ridiculous feats of strength out of the public eye, which of course has led to a bunch of shit-talking in the modern era, because what is the internet if not a forum for every shit-eating troglodyte to proffer his or her wholly uninformed opinion on anything and everything? In spite of the fact I would basically represent the anti-Christ to this peculiar motherfucker, I feel it necessary to stand against the masses in stark opposition to their criticism of his lifts, and to take up yet another related issue- gym lifts are <i>just as valid</i> in the discussion of strength as competition lifts. USAPL lifters can just go ahead and fuck off right now, because I'm about to destroy the sad little world in which you live.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">There seriously are maybe five pictures of Chuck Ahrens, so just pretend this is him raising the roof. I've gotta space these motherfuckers out.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Before I get off on a wild-eyed tangent about how I had far more fun at a youth service in born-again Christian church (at least they had hot chicks and a punk band) than I have at a dreary-ass, pinch-faced, proselytizing USAPL meet, let's get back to the man-mountain, Chuck Ahrens. Standing 6'1" and weighing somewhere between 300 and 330lbs, Chuck Ahrens wouldn't make the largest strongman in the modern era (though if he'd trained legs, he'd be up there), but in the 1950s looked like he tore through a movie screen out of a monster film, ready to rampage through downtown Tokyo if provoked. Said to have a visibly larger upper body than fellow behemoth Paul Anderson, Ahrens was only photographed in a t-shirt once, finally satisfying Peary Rader's curiosity about the actual size of his arms.</span><br />
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<u><b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Ahrens' Vital Statistics</span></b></u><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Height: 6'</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Weight: 330 pounds (at his strongest); ranged between 280lbs and 330lbs </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chest: 58" (unexpanded)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Arms: 22-3/8"</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Shoulder Width: 28"</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAuU3KzXtmkNG1JBtgYT1xONp4tCjdSvLhJrf2ltFwUY8dx5My7ep67iIDe67G1_jgAvGxUx13EQBmadmV2u19UfTsmm8Y857ROCRFi1g5pV_X0XNQZZNAySXmOTVfOwWWspxa-MO7iIP8/s1600/81c6bddd-c8d3-45d9-a590-bdb955857f22.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="329" data-original-width="450" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiAuU3KzXtmkNG1JBtgYT1xONp4tCjdSvLhJrf2ltFwUY8dx5My7ep67iIDe67G1_jgAvGxUx13EQBmadmV2u19UfTsmm8Y857ROCRFi1g5pV_X0XNQZZNAySXmOTVfOwWWspxa-MO7iIP8/s1600/81c6bddd-c8d3-45d9-a590-bdb955857f22.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Ahrens made the bitches drool. This is why he always wore long sleeves and pants- slut drool burns Christian skin.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As I mentioned, internet "lifters" will talk shit, and they love to talk shit about Ahrens. For instance, on forums you'll see some skinny dickhead opening his worthless fucking wordhole about the 28 reps with 400 on the bench claim, citing the fact he never benched heavy. Ahrens is documented by multiple sources doing a triple with 355 on a fucking skullcrusher. I've known a few guys who could hit 12 reps with 405 on any given day, and they struggled to do a few reps with 225 on skullcrushers. Another lift that would go a long way to corroborating that is his behind the neck press of 380lbs, as would his steep incline benches for reps of 225lb dumbbells. So let's dispense with the pussy shit- just because you've never seen it doesn't mean it hasn't been done. His lifting partners, who were far stronger than most, said Ahrens could do their best lifts cold. And finally, the people talking shit on Ahrens lift nothing and know less- "it was argued in <i>MILO®: A Journal For Serious Strength Athletes</i> that if one considered the consistency of the reports along with the sources involved, it would be hard to conclude anything other than that he really did do things like a standing overhead press of around 300 pounds with one arm" (Strossen). We'll never really know, however, because according to Peary Rader "We... try to keep readers informed about Chuck and his progress but he is very much against publicity" (Piche).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chuck's favorite color was plaid.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If you go and read Piche's piece (in the sources), which I used for a lot of the weights attributed to Ahrens, he fails to mention in stating that Ahrens' lifts are semi-mythical that Ahrens would often quit lifting for extended period of time, which would account for the rise and fall of reported body weight, weights lifted, and associated measurements- no matter whether he was 280 or 330, if he had lifted yesterday or hadn't lifted in months, the man made fucking mountains look like tiny little bitches. Then he either curled or overhead pressed them just to show them what the fuck was up, because fuck mountains.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Going back to the man in question, he was rarely photographed and virtually all of the records of his lifts come from second hand sources, weirdly in spite of the fact that he was a mainstay of Muscle Beach when it was the mecca of weight lifting and bodybuilding. This would be like Tara Reid only getting caught on film a couple of times in the entire <i>Sharknado</i> series (and how glorious it would be not to have to look at her hideous, Michael Jackson-impersonating visage for ninety minutes). Given, however, that the man was about as disinterested in public relations as he was about training in temperature appropriate attire, it confuses me why people would discredit his lifts. It wasn't Ahrens bragging about his strength, because he wasn't some attention whore with Histrionic Personality Disorder begging people to like him by posting every fucking workout online, no matter how shitty- it was anyone from his own training partners, one of whom was a well-respected minister, to well respected journalists, and sundry other onlookers. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIlUBWQWWWLZUwiJn4mwU7fsolDwwXUsg4cM46XTX29A66qJOPSxum_f03Oa2Ce-td1lVtz1F-d9lPQA7uJdaj4dEr8VGBsLRiblH7zuj_Sjdz8AeM_EXlSWuZQjj0aYqF3YGvB0wQlOsh/s1600/604thomas_inch1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="604" data-original-width="908" height="425" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIlUBWQWWWLZUwiJn4mwU7fsolDwwXUsg4cM46XTX29A66qJOPSxum_f03Oa2Ce-td1lVtz1F-d9lPQA7uJdaj4dEr8VGBsLRiblH7zuj_Sjdz8AeM_EXlSWuZQjj0aYqF3YGvB0wQlOsh/s640/604thomas_inch1.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Dr. Carlin Venus was not small.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In regards to his training partner, Carlin Venus, he was a 5'10", 255lb Doctor of Nutritional Science and Holistic Nutrition with an IQ between 180 and 190. Not only was the guy a champion bodybuilder with a 60" chest, 18" calves, and 20" arms, but he was a pro wrestler, boxer, and martial artist who spoke five languages (Minichiello). <u>This is a man who would not be given to hyperbole in describing the feats of others</u>. To wit, the following are Carlin's best ever lifts, all of whom were attested to by the guys at the gym where he trained, and all of them were notarized. These lifts, Carlin said, were lifts that Ahrens could do in long sleeves and pants, without any warmup at all, on any given day. By Carlin's account, Ahrens was one step shy of Superman (Green) and several dozen steps ahead of everyone else.</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Good Mornings</b> – 395lbs.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b> – 625lbs for 12 reps.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One-Arm Dumbbell Press</b> – 210lbs for 10 reps, either hand.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Press From The Racks</b> – 475lbs for 2 reps.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Barbell Curl</b> (with back against the wall) – 245lbs.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Reverse Curl </b>– 205lbs.</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4fjyilgG11z4lAp3Wen4qnPEihkw3mw6yXrW5-Ifk8fsEP4UtMQccc7eYuZwxhHL4I9VndGUXq37oiYz2UBmVbX90pPehSJF2XBTeLuK3cjL6DmNsOWS3l7Vs_TJJj_dqCnpl3xw8X2V2/s1600/ahren.bmp" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="274" data-original-width="343" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4fjyilgG11z4lAp3Wen4qnPEihkw3mw6yXrW5-Ifk8fsEP4UtMQccc7eYuZwxhHL4I9VndGUXq37oiYz2UBmVbX90pPehSJF2XBTeLuK3cjL6DmNsOWS3l7Vs_TJJj_dqCnpl3xw8X2V2/s1600/ahren.bmp" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">My man was all about that bicep and shoulder work.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Due to the fact that the naysayers always fucking manage to say "nay", I thought it pertinent to mention that the one of the most prominent authors on the subject of strength history, David Willoughby, considers Ahrens' feats to have been legit. Furthermore, renown strength luminary and President of the All-Round Weightlifting Association, "Thom Van Vleck [said] that he remembers his uncles discussing Chuck’s lifts in the early JWC Club – both skeptical and in awe of him. <b>Chuck Ahrens inspired many lifters to 'take on the impossible' and get stronger</b>" (Meyers). If you prefer to think that his lifts are all bullshit, you probably post on Getbig and Bodybuilding.com, and likely on some weird subreddit filled with weaklings rocking limp dicks, so you might as well just quit lifting anyway. For the rest of you, check this shit out, and let it motivate you to John Wick the fuck up and do the impossible (Piche, Willoughby):</span></div>
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Chuck Ahrens' Best Lifts</span></u></b></div>
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<ul>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Standing Behind the Neck Press</b> – 390lbs</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Strict Overhead Press</b> – 270lb dumbbell </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Push Press</b> – 350lbs dumbbell</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Continental Overhead Press</b> – 375 x 1 (according to bodybuilder Oliver Sacks); 310 x 3; 280 for reps the year before that (continental press it kind of the lay back method used in the Olympics right before the press was dropped) <span style="color: red;">[Note: Anderson could only do 300 in this style]</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Two Arm Dumbbell Overhead Press</b> – 204lb dumbbells (408lbs total) with Paul Anderson watching </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Front Raise</b> – 200-pound dumbbell</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Crucifix</b> – 150lb dumbbells</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Two Arm Dumbbell Clean and Press</b> – 205lb dumbbells</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Row</b> – 350lbs for reps</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Skullcrusher</b> – 400lbs x 1; 375 x 2 (without a warmup); 355lbs x 3 (another account has 345 x 2)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Standing Tricep Extension</b> – 305 x 2 (without a warmup)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Seated Dumbbell Cheat Curl</b> – 180lbs x 1; 165 pound dumbbells x 3 </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Alternate Dumbbell Cheat Curl</b> – 200 lb. dumbbells (per the legendary Pat Casey)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Curl</b> – 375lbs x 3 on a bent 1" diameter bar</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>One Arm Concentration Curl</b> – 115lbs on an Olympic bar, in strict form and without bracing his arm against his leg</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b> – 560 or 570 x 1 (according to historian David P. Willoughby); 400 x 28 (per the same); 400 x 20 (according to Apr 1995 <i>MILO</i>)</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Like you, I want to know how Chuck trained just like most dogs want to know why humans get to eat delicious t-bones every night while they're stuck eating shit scraped up off the floor, dried, mashed into little balls, injected with artificial flavors and scents, and then fed to them as "food." Well, just like I will never know why in the fuck anyone would be so cruel as to feed their best friend like that, we will never fucking know how Chuck Ahrens really trained, beyond hard and long as Ron Jeremy's dick, and even more frequently than Ed Sheeran plays shitty music. Details on his workouts are hazy as your recollection of a bachelor party, but it was reported that his Ahrens'</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"favorite exercises are curls, and presses with dumbbells and the triceps press on bench with barbell. He specializes on these with heavy weights and rather low reps. He has done almost no leg and back work" (Piche). He likes to eat six large steaks per day to maintain his bulk and size (that is one way to get your protein, fellows, if you can afford it) (Piche). </span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidsSuYW6TYTkrRVfSKnR-K7KzH_OqssaSqcWMj8ZxLyJNeC2ngFyWJni41DOgzDxNuhBpaNpbiAOiRlL-fqSBMj_wExfE6BvbIoVeuJn90NaNdvzXWLbkwglIfv6phfUg4y_cYa6iooLOS/s1600/Chuck7.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="338" data-original-width="334" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidsSuYW6TYTkrRVfSKnR-K7KzH_OqssaSqcWMj8ZxLyJNeC2ngFyWJni41DOgzDxNuhBpaNpbiAOiRlL-fqSBMj_wExfE6BvbIoVeuJn90NaNdvzXWLbkwglIfv6phfUg4y_cYa6iooLOS/s320/Chuck7.jpg" width="316" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Pic of Ahrens at 290 lbs and Paul Anderson at 355, Paul looking like Bluto from Animal House and Ahrens looking jacked as fuck.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Of course, nothing Ahrens did was at a steady pace. Ahrens was a sprinter, not a marathon runner, and as such he would train in bursts followed by month long or more layoffs. As you can imagine, that meant that both his bodyweight and the weights he'd use in training had their ups and downs, although he generally didn't see much of a concomitant dropoff with his training weights as his bodyweight. His secret? He treated the weights like their name was Deebo and he was Smokey in the movie <i>Friday-</i> he had mind control over that shit. That is how he forced the weights to constantly increase, in spite of whatever setbacks he might have had, and make everyone look like his punk bitch in doing so.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrDfVeafrrUEN4MT13haoJ76y5EAf6wV8Kijv87DvF9CWDzbk8SF83awgBaKEXLnn6uVxusGAa3GdnJ2li5U4aMvPLDjBvuU4Os3_0SaRjmMoV7WJgPZ9JkpLH3ednMH9L8fnKgkC-V6Fu/s1600/download+%25283%2529.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjrDfVeafrrUEN4MT13haoJ76y5EAf6wV8Kijv87DvF9CWDzbk8SF83awgBaKEXLnn6uVxusGAa3GdnJ2li5U4aMvPLDjBvuU4Os3_0SaRjmMoV7WJgPZ9JkpLH3ednMH9L8fnKgkC-V6Fu/s1600/download+%25283%2529.jpeg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">To forestall the inevitable "'mind control' is an obvious euphemism for 'steroids'", I'll remind you people that I've never dissembled about steroid use- the man was not on gear. Ahrens' opinion of steroids, in the words of his lifting partner:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"The way Charlie (Chuck Ahrens, Carlin’s training partner) and I felt, if you wanted more steroids . . . just eat more meat! After all, the beef was so loaded down with that junk for breeding and raising. Hahaha, we determined one time just how much was being pumped into chickens and beef at the time and it blew our minds. I guess you could say that we were on steroids. Indirectly. I mean, we got a big laugh out of that, but there was something to it" (Green). </span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9xw7JM8nFvIUOl0RgZZgmzN9WY7SaTtw2ZsWVXk2jRMQZdFIV6iPH-OU_hCUfLgOGSYsFTCE7tgFNoULh_-c2_P8dAqqJrZqJwFYvmRXvCStufog-V0l4l4_HZNt5juoc6pT2FlWJUY4J/s1600/roidrage.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="464" data-original-width="450" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9xw7JM8nFvIUOl0RgZZgmzN9WY7SaTtw2ZsWVXk2jRMQZdFIV6iPH-OU_hCUfLgOGSYsFTCE7tgFNoULh_-c2_P8dAqqJrZqJwFYvmRXvCStufog-V0l4l4_HZNt5juoc6pT2FlWJUY4J/s1600/roidrage.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Porn for natty bros. You guys are so cool.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">To add a bit to that, here is an editor's note from a writeup on Chuck, whose strength peaked in 1957-1958:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"[Ed Note: We must remember that although testosterone was being manufactured by 1935, it was almost never used by people in the iron game. Remember also that 1957 was several years before Bill March, Tony Garcy, and Lou Riecke— aided by John Ziegler— introduced anabolic steroids to the strength sports in this country. Dianabol was not manufactured until 1958]" (Neece).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Instead of steroids, Chuck Ahrens believed in the power of sleep in a way no one else did- narcoleptics would marvel at the man's ability to drop and sleep wherever he stood. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"He’d even sleep right in the middle of the gym if it was time! Can you imagine? Hahaha . . . I’ll never forget. Guys like Sidney Sheldon and other movie producers and moguls would come into the gym and have to step over Charlie who might have decided to take a noon nap near the door. I mean, if it was time for a nap, it was time. Everybody was cool, though. They respected Charlie and didn’t disturb him. After awhile no one thought anything of it" (Green).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg44OmR45-vucgkhQZNijsHx3OYYEWhav7snmWrBeTQyo_8UL8azH4_rOez3CYllGbCd5x4-S9UkhRMY1QMwCypnxlMc0uhlAf6Q6ZHeCOJphnMA9rQHbzMllFfvVMre-REFdSo7VpaOIPT/s1600/Chuck-Ahrens.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="448" data-original-width="265" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg44OmR45-vucgkhQZNijsHx3OYYEWhav7snmWrBeTQyo_8UL8azH4_rOez3CYllGbCd5x4-S9UkhRMY1QMwCypnxlMc0uhlAf6Q6ZHeCOJphnMA9rQHbzMllFfvVMre-REFdSo7VpaOIPT/s1600/Chuck-Ahrens.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">My man was about that crucifix life.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">One exercise we sort of know he did frequently, and with which Ahrens is credited, apparently helped build his herculean shoulder strength and is the eponymous Ahrens Press. I've done this exercise for years, having learned of it in some <i>Men's Health</i> book years ago under the name "W Press," without having any knowledge that it was Ahrens' apparent bread and butter lift. In addition to unbelievably heavy lateral raises, overhead barbell presses, and high incline presses the Ahrens Press was apparently his jam, his jelly, his peanut butter, and his peanuts.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZyj9vh-ocU9ycDDHdxGDek3NiqdnkE__MxsFkixpiu1oaFg4gQUe6ZQuzXePpW2JkTYmNKPS-0vAUfumIDHYX6otEkqzN4mk4g2be1htPQOi6i67U9TUtkLwGG0YpTifonuuLhQLF74ud/s1600/4++Ahrens+Press+++YouTube+%25281%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="422" data-original-width="411" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgZyj9vh-ocU9ycDDHdxGDek3NiqdnkE__MxsFkixpiu1oaFg4gQUe6ZQuzXePpW2JkTYmNKPS-0vAUfumIDHYX6otEkqzN4mk4g2be1htPQOi6i67U9TUtkLwGG0YpTifonuuLhQLF74ud/s200/4++Ahrens+Press+++YouTube+%25281%2529.png" width="193" /></a><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuz_0KDGv5EhTt7nlal2ccwHJN2PUOo6-2Z711JZOjuAXr0dQrZ0Xly_1gBlAmr8kSJ_JE35pciySpMzBVz5UkPnQoWKW8OwsyQFb3OD83t9RLU0YfsvZL3RmeJd4GDhelg8vSUFBnDTJa/s1600/4++Ahrens+Press+++YouTube.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" data-original-height="428" data-original-width="492" height="172" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuz_0KDGv5EhTt7nlal2ccwHJN2PUOo6-2Z711JZOjuAXr0dQrZ0Xly_1gBlAmr8kSJ_JE35pciySpMzBVz5UkPnQoWKW8OwsyQFb3OD83t9RLU0YfsvZL3RmeJd4GDhelg8vSUFBnDTJa/s200/4++Ahrens+Press+++YouTube.png" width="200" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Should be pretty obvious to see why it's called a W Press.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">This is a modified dumbbell press, which shouldn't shock you after looking at Ahren's best lifts- the man loved dumbbell pressing like fat people love excuses and donuts. The modification, obvious if you see the above, is that the dumbbells are pressed up and out to make a V with them. The great irony here is that it was a matter of utility for Ahrens, who had to use really long-handled dumbbells loaded with a shitload of plates, and we're just some assholes waving light dumbbells around in the air. Nevertheless, doing your dumbbell presses (or FreeMotion machine presses, which are actually a pretty awesome way to knock these out) like this will bring the fucking pain, and undoubtedly place stress on your delts and traps that will lend itself to bigger gains and a bigger overhead press.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUztZZW6wqVvjKIWH60JumKpOruSjg-ebUrvGISXr6b-ielAqVsRI0LxZXG6aI1dEb8f8GrHsA_mxv9TgX45XrCRVq6Q6oQWKVX5zAuu_vJ_GJnezCoMLt0gksJtbY-C3mPcV2DXqMtu7y/s1600/Mister-Incredible-The-Incredibles-Bob-Parr-b.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="932" data-original-width="500" height="640" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUztZZW6wqVvjKIWH60JumKpOruSjg-ebUrvGISXr6b-ielAqVsRI0LxZXG6aI1dEb8f8GrHsA_mxv9TgX45XrCRVq6Q6oQWKVX5zAuu_vJ_GJnezCoMLt0gksJtbY-C3mPcV2DXqMtu7y/s640/Mister-Incredible-The-Incredibles-Bob-Parr-b.jpg" width="343" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I am completely out of Chuck Ahrens pics, so here is Mr. Incredible, for whom Ahrens seems to have been the model.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The foregoing was a celebration of yet another Paul Bunyan-meets Hercules-meets-John Henry man whose lifts and physique were beyond compare and date from the pre-steroid, the pre-powerlifting, pre-Internet, and the pre-everyone is a humorless, shit-talking, robotic fuck in the gym era. Like the halcyon days spoken about by Ronald Reagan when describing the 1950's, the modern wistful view of the hilariously misogynistic era of chivalry, and even Plato's description of the Golden Age, that era likely sucked as much as it was awesome... but even at 50% suck it beats the fuck out of the modern era. One of the ways in which it did was that people actually believed first hand accounts of other lifters' achievements without the bizarre amount of shit talking and naysaying by a bunch of limp wristed bitches who have trouble believing people could lift a sack of groceries without breaking a sweat. In other words, it was an era in which people actually enjoyed lifting, rather than enjoying simply posturing and taking up space in the gym like a bunch of assholes in matchy-matchy workout gear.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi19CGOJDwhATFFbGTY2T1P7o3IU-faeQZheXTD-bgUAZ-wHo1vswcNPuh31byoVgA5sMuWL4w1xQ3_FH0L5EfnPXHE5vu-mgw7eE4INPEx39voYirDXeskodOYCe26TOSYhVQB8oMFmYuX/s1600/Tattooed-girl-double-fucking.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="223" data-original-width="443" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi19CGOJDwhATFFbGTY2T1P7o3IU-faeQZheXTD-bgUAZ-wHo1vswcNPuh31byoVgA5sMuWL4w1xQ3_FH0L5EfnPXHE5vu-mgw7eE4INPEx39voYirDXeskodOYCe26TOSYhVQB8oMFmYuX/s1600/Tattooed-girl-double-fucking.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">You are about to be fucked with cocks of truth, and there shall be no lube.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The above paragraph should preface where the rest of this article is headed. We've already covered the man himself, but a great many people still discount his lifts because they weren't done in a competition setting. The reasons dumber than the Lt Governor of Texas are threefold: 1) at the time in which Ahrens lived, odd lifting competitions were less well organized than an orgy in a mental hospital and not terribly common, and 2) for some people, all competitions are seems to be begging for validation from a stranger to confirm what you already know. As such, I feel it necessary to explain why gym lifts (<b><u>and I am referring to credible gym lifts, not Brad Castleberry fake plate bullshit or the highly entertaining Jimmy "The Iron Bull Pellechia" multiple-partner assisted nonsense</u></b>) should matter to you. It's ridiculous that such a thing is necessary, but the 150lb pussies screeching "GYM LIFTS DON'T MATTER" all over social media need to have their mouths shut. As it happens, I am a guy who can do just that, so what follows is by far and away the most vitriolic and heartfelt expression myriad problems with the lifting world at this point. If you take issue with it, feel free to say so in the comments, because they will doubtless be entertaining, and I assure you that whatever your contention, I am wholly correct and you're so wrong you might as well be the embodiment of donkey shows featuring children.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJFvBS4ac77fURisBwfUvfybGD5YqAhA-NbDTT-vimbfVlwrPu2XX4wqVngrfQlDxbW-v0ESc3ouUvixuEQbRdMZexgbQGkoy3lL3aUNzQAUYF2iJAfQzAjXtoe4q4Eog6irZqfLi6idxg/s1600/IronBull.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="575" data-original-width="417" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjJFvBS4ac77fURisBwfUvfybGD5YqAhA-NbDTT-vimbfVlwrPu2XX4wqVngrfQlDxbW-v0ESc3ouUvixuEQbRdMZexgbQGkoy3lL3aUNzQAUYF2iJAfQzAjXtoe4q4Eog6irZqfLi6idxg/s1600/IronBull.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">While he was thoroughly entertaining back in the day in <i>Muscular Development</i>, Jimmy "The Iron Bull" Pellechia and his preposterous "1100lb bench" type stuff did nothing to help he modern credibility of gym lifts. Taken as cheat moves, though, the dude was impressive with his cheat laterals and curls, because the man's form was nothing if not... innovative. As to Brad Castleberry, well, he's clearly mentally retarded and I wonder how he originally could afford fake plates.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">There are exactly two types of people who say gym lifts don't matter:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">People who are desperate for the validation of themselves by others and who want to invalidate the lifters they've seen outlift them in the gym, and</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">People don't actually enjoy lifting but are desperate to be a part of something, so they want to invalidate the lifts of people they see outlift them on a daily basis.</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That's it. I have personally seen people casually perform lifts in the gym I've never seen duplicated anywhere else, and they didn't compete because they saw no point in it. Either they knew they were crazy strong, or they didn't give a fuck about competing and didn't really care how strong they were in comparison to people who pay for their validation. Who the fuck knows why they didn't compete? It doesn't matter- they just loved to lift. It was all about the journey, and not about the participation trophy at the destination.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhN54vbWmGD-aK2cZ236NWLHJ16j6it23tCEmIXO4UYYX0mJcVBjUQf2UDY1UgHLS1dPJt0E_DVYXn9et2M9TZ3WJTiAiyKVkv6nMlivbp5MVXy8NfqlNjVg_6Wi31OFnTFdauuNKX7YefK/s1600/Bodybuilding-1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1287" data-original-width="1600" height="514" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhN54vbWmGD-aK2cZ236NWLHJ16j6it23tCEmIXO4UYYX0mJcVBjUQf2UDY1UgHLS1dPJt0E_DVYXn9et2M9TZ3WJTiAiyKVkv6nMlivbp5MVXy8NfqlNjVg_6Wi31OFnTFdauuNKX7YefK/s640/Bodybuilding-1.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The skinny little guy on the left is a totally lit USAPL lifter. "Ugh. No glute ham raise? No foam roller? HAS EVERYONE IN THIS BUILDING HAD THEIR CAFFEINE LEVELS TESTED BY THE USIOC TO ENSURE THEY COMPLY WITH MY FEDERATION'S PREPOSTEROUS RULES? Come on, Ryder, let's go get a couple of 100% natural organic, non-GMO, Fair Trade boba teas for our preworkout and go to a <i>real</i> gym. I had a really tough workout three weeks ago and really need to do an hour and a half of prehab before I fiddlefuck around the gym for 25 minutes. Did you bring all of the cameras?"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Nor was powerlifting or Olympic weightlifting nearly as popular in the pre-Internet era. They were fringe sports people competed in either in foreign countries or dank basements somewhere- I don't recall meeting a powerlifter prior to 2001, and even then he was generally considered to be a weirdo with his triple ply gear. Certainly, geared lifting was a thing, but there was very little knowledge of it outside of the pages of Powerlifting USA and bodybuilding expos like the Show of Strength (though I'm sure the people competing in it at that time would take exception to that statement), and Olympic weightlifting was just something foreigners seemed to busy themselves with (a statement with which no one would take issue).</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy13OK5JvmShXGgtggFXqdGsdwYwnSuXvxtieeXOnLcwNERJza4aal0hxpl7-bxPc8NSMAaGs24ywdLc4YuLAjDMKnps5DL23K4QijuBRmeZnXEg_sRcUUVJOZ-XPypaH3DUXE2hc9-fhG/s1600/awarw.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="720" data-original-width="1280" height="360" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiy13OK5JvmShXGgtggFXqdGsdwYwnSuXvxtieeXOnLcwNERJza4aal0hxpl7-bxPc8NSMAaGs24ywdLc4YuLAjDMKnps5DL23K4QijuBRmeZnXEg_sRcUUVJOZ-XPypaH3DUXE2hc9-fhG/s640/awarw.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">"detached retinas, deviated septums, internal hemorrhaging, torn cartilage, these are things which dreams are made of, and our dreams are your nightmares! Uhhhhhhh, WHAT A RUSH!!!"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">-the catastrophically (for their opponents) strong Road Warriors giving their response to "gym lifts don't mean shit."</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Now that the Internet Age is upon us, we're besieged by a bunch of loudmouth nutsacks who got on the internet and decided that if they lifted (something they seem to actually detest but feel some need to do) they'd be cool in the eyes of others. Participating in a competition, no matter how pathetic or noncompetitive their numbers, provides them with "numbers" they can use for validation when talking to other nutsacks (I'm looking at you goofballs posting your Wilks). It's not like the outside world cares if your numbers came on a platform or in your mom's basement- they're just making conversation when they ask you what you lift. And before I get called a gatekeeper by you touchy little pussies, I'm not saying not to train like a powerlifter- I'm suggesting maybe it'd be better for everyone involved if you waited until you were competitive to get in front of people and lift weights. You're not a six year old playing soccer for the orange slices at halftime- you're an adult making an ass of yourself and wasting everyone's time.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7QDa8DaAV8gdGQZBsDsZzmGejcfkvuWPhOfcFbMDz_i7VDSgiXM6LKcG-DArxyMr07XvRLSkKwlko8KsJKLUtkTsoSKhpvPsIVslYyVQm2Hjvyphl6MLmh-GsYGdKvbq5obd6yOgW4y7r/s1600/front-squats-arnold.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="421" data-original-width="611" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg7QDa8DaAV8gdGQZBsDsZzmGejcfkvuWPhOfcFbMDz_i7VDSgiXM6LKcG-DArxyMr07XvRLSkKwlko8KsJKLUtkTsoSKhpvPsIVslYyVQm2Hjvyphl6MLmh-GsYGdKvbq5obd6yOgW4y7r/s1600/front-squats-arnold.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Nobody cares how much you front squat, bro- only back squats matter. Also, steroids. So what's your Wilks, anyway. Hahahaha, hey guys! He doesn't even know what a Wilks is! DYEL?"- Every fucking bitchmade USAPL lifter ever</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I've already discussed the sad beginnings of Olympic weightlifting, which involved a style of lifting made popular by the nations behind the resurrection of the Olympics and used that style to exclude the Germans and Central Europeans, who would stomp them in weight lifting competitions. The reality behind the creation of powerlifting is even more sad- Jim Witt, the father of powerlifting, sucked at Olympic weightlifting and was bothered by the wide array of strength tests in Odd Lift competitions (Starr, Rader). To simplify the sport and make it easy for people who found having generalized strength too daunting, he codified the sport of powerlifting in the three simplest lifts and ditched the rest. To break that down- the Germans and Central Europeans stomped the Brits and French in lifting, so the French and English made the clean lifts their chosen sports in the Olympics, and because the Americans sucked at all of the aforementioned, we created what is basically the Special Olympics of strength sports.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAzT8OiLPM1YHLTs7mGDPIRNI8NR4NPY7Rmck9z3W576YiaCIt-qelKWpj8Xc3rCBjzwMLr91MBFcsEF7UlHMWY0jDqe1EX50GelrrihgtVYBLLEtOa2cM_mCZaT_Q9KOGQqdkd1fhsOoj/s1600/bonnie-rotten-public-bang-bangbros.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="272" data-original-width="500" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhAzT8OiLPM1YHLTs7mGDPIRNI8NR4NPY7Rmck9z3W576YiaCIt-qelKWpj8Xc3rCBjzwMLr91MBFcsEF7UlHMWY0jDqe1EX50GelrrihgtVYBLLEtOa2cM_mCZaT_Q9KOGQqdkd1fhsOoj/s1600/bonnie-rotten-public-bang-bangbros.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">You like that? Well, fucking take it, because there's more, bitch.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">That is fairly amusing to realize- I had a world record in what is essentially the strength world's Special Olympics. I set that record without specifically training for the sport to prove how easy it was to do so, and that sport specific training was totally unnecessary. Apparently I failed in the effort, in spite of being what I consider to be a massively entertaining, impressively strong asshole and breaking a record that had stood for 40 years. The reason behind my success is simple, I fucking love to throw around heavy weights. Like a lot of people who don't violently identify with one of the modern strength sports, doing crazy lifts and heaving around heavy weights is the norm. We often share Bruce Randall's (and many other old schoolers') undying love for 1/4 front squats. Fuck that ass to grass shit- some people just like moving heavy weights to test the limits of their body's structual capacity. We vastly prefer rack pulling a thousand pounds and shrugging it than putting 700 off the floor. Cheat curls are in the program often and heavy, because they're fucking fun, and we don't restrict ourselves to training for a couple of basically boring lifts so we can spend 12 hours on a Saturday waiting to collect one of 100 trophies. We feel this way because, unlike most of the holier-than-though, my shitty fed is better than your shitty fed, my lame sport is better than your lame sport online lifting community, <i>actually </i>love lifting weights.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tom Platz never bothered competing in powerlifting, because what would be the fucking point? At his peak, he was squatting 600 x 10-15, with a crazy narrow stance and no wraps. He'd have mangled everybody if he actually gave a shit, which he clearly didn't.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Obviously, we are a dying breed. Everyone today seems to just <i>love</i> paying $100 to pay for a participation medal in a sport about which no one outside of it gives a flying fuck. That makes no sense whatsoever- at least Spartan Racers acknowledge that OCRs are just for fun and they don't bore you with the details of their training. Oh, and they have enough dignity and self-respect to do their own fucking programming.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2MnHuK2f3NZsVWSKqUzz9sGVWkRLSrui4SMb8qGs4_eeMjNYXaczTlYezd_FfTI4XAf_oRgGx4FBlBAzfUCHQ3ZMLOhCUEQ_LFAa-IbUMCSOyszoz8EU4Zhh_sQOjD-U_24Eih65UueCX/s1600/powerlifting-squat+%25281%2529.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="501" data-original-width="700" height="457" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2MnHuK2f3NZsVWSKqUzz9sGVWkRLSrui4SMb8qGs4_eeMjNYXaczTlYezd_FfTI4XAf_oRgGx4FBlBAzfUCHQ3ZMLOhCUEQ_LFAa-IbUMCSOyszoz8EU4Zhh_sQOjD-U_24Eih65UueCX/s640/powerlifting-squat+%25281%2529.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Getting the little people involved was the goal. Keeps them off the streets, or in the modern case, out of their parents' basements. Mostly. I suppose it just keeps them from shooting up their high school now.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Speaking of which, did I mention that one of the reasons Jim Witt promoted the modern sport of powerlifting is:</span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"the exercises could be done in a limited space <b>with basic equipment and there was not any need for a coach?</b> All that was needed to train were an Olympic bar, flat bench, and some sort of squat rack, and lots of hard work. Most of the powerlifters in the country trained at small gyms in garages and basements, and of course, YMCAs" (Starr). </span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In other words, all of the fancy equipment you dickheads demand for the special olympics in lieu of a fucking dip belt (I've taken to just bringing my own since they seem to have been removed from the budget for reverse hypers and GHRs and other assorted pointless bullshit) is putting lipstick on a pig and then calling that pig Fancy Einstein. Your coach? Likely worthless. Congratulations. You're proud to be a part of a sport that you snooze your way through following cookie cutter programs and coaches' advice and you pay a ridiculous amount of money to do something designed to be simple and wildly inexpensive. And then you still suck at it, which amounts to taking a steaming shit on the spirit of the entire thing. There is a reason why the special olympics of the strength world is <i>actually</i> in the Special Olympics. So get the fuck over yourselves, already. This shit is <b>supposed to be fucking fun</b>.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4quM39rPCsmFupk7ZfCeRAEZb7KGSy_2kcJzYXyoQX9LpwDHn6mXYtcK6PA1wtez1jJnYZkflbbGbasaWhm1AtoF6oPVPofKeVHqXP21VjIqk92hydfPmqgeGnz6LAJDZTTrnagiMyr6b/s1600/1142141-tick_ninjas_1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="589" data-original-width="1124" height="335" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4quM39rPCsmFupk7ZfCeRAEZb7KGSy_2kcJzYXyoQX9LpwDHn6mXYtcK6PA1wtez1jJnYZkflbbGbasaWhm1AtoF6oPVPofKeVHqXP21VjIqk92hydfPmqgeGnz6LAJDZTTrnagiMyr6b/s640/1142141-tick_ninjas_1.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">There are like four pics of Chuck Ahrens, so the Tick, who also skipped leg day, can be his stand-in. Substitute "bullshit message board 'lifters'" for ninjas, and this pic will do nicely.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In short, many of you likely have <a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Histrionic_personality_disorder" target="_blank">Histrionic Personality Disorder</a> and should seek treatment, whether it be in the form of a doctor or <a href="http://www.realultimatepower.net/index4.htm" target="_blank">eating a fucking Frisbee</a>. Outside of the fucking gym, and outside of strength sports. Not only are you annoying as fuck to the people who truly love lifting, but you're likely just exacerbating a legitimate mental illness. Or you can just take a page out of the book of a man who was stronger than anyone we're ever likely to meet short of the top three strongmen on the planet and enjoy the process rather than the result, because in the end, no one really gives a shit. Huge and strong and awesome is the way to live- trudging through workouts you didn't design filming yourself like you're your own paparazzi is fucking retarded. Whatever you do, stop taking yourselves so fucking seriously, because again- no one on Earth outside of a select few of us really gives a shit about any of this. And remember:</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">“Think it.” - Chuck Ahrens </span></b></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">The most powerful tool is THE MIND. </span></b><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirvN9Ex6NXpRUB3TEu0KqyYvdR7d58FCfqQwF1F51veFDKY_2xS1TNFU0idqmKFGzIyM8yhN_cCWpmSHu72WV3pvpcRpmSIeLIO03KnEmbS0vIgF3Fw6bFXWCiEwSgLGzuLb28WrKhDlZ_/s1600/tumblr_og9cj1Qb7j1vuuimko1_400.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirvN9Ex6NXpRUB3TEu0KqyYvdR7d58FCfqQwF1F51veFDKY_2xS1TNFU0idqmKFGzIyM8yhN_cCWpmSHu72WV3pvpcRpmSIeLIO03KnEmbS0vIgF3Fw6bFXWCiEwSgLGzuLb28WrKhDlZ_/s1600/tumblr_og9cj1Qb7j1vuuimko1_400.gif" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Second most powerful being Satanic porn, of course.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Green, Bob. Carlin Venus Speaks on Training with Ahrens, Davis, Reeves and Others (1984). Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> 24 Jun 2008. Web. 17 May 2018.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/06/carlin-venus-interview-bob-green.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/06/carlin-venus-interview-bob-green.html</a></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Mahler, Mike. A conversation with Jimmy "The Iron Bull" Pellechia. T-Nation. 23 Aug 2002. Web. 18 May 2018. <a href="https://www.t-nation.com/training/power-hungry">https://www.t-nation.com/training/power-hungry</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Meyers, Al. Remembering Chuck Ahrens. USAWA. 1 Feb 2010. Web. 11 Oct 2016. <a href="http://usawa.com/remembering-chuck-Ahrens/">http://usawa.com/remembering-chuck-Ahrens/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Minichiello, Tom. Dr. Carlin C. Venus. Tom Minichiello's Bodybuilding History (jul/Aug 2004). 2007. Web. 19 May 2018. <a href="http://superspectrim.com/eclipse.htm">http://superspectrim.com/eclipse.htm</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Murray, Al and Oscar State. The grip in the press (1949). Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 18 Jan 2015. Web. 17 May 2018.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2015/01/the-grip-in-press-al-murray-and-oscar.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2015/01/the-grip-in-press-al-murray-and-oscar.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Neece, S. Some lesser known strongmen of the Fifties and Sixties. Iron Game History. 1998 May; 5(1):16-25. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Piche, Bill. The legend of Chuck Ahrens. Bodybuilding.com. 12 Oct 2004. Web. 19 May 2018. <a href="https://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/cyberpump14.htm">https://www.bodybuilding.com/fun/cyberpump14.htm</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rader, Peary. Powerlifting: how it all started (1983). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 2 Dec 2009. Web. 18 May 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/12/powerlifting-how-it-all-started-peary.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/12/powerlifting-how-it-all-started-peary.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sacks, Oliver. The bodybuilder: Oliver Sacks' days on Muscle Beach. Science Friday. 22 Jan 2016. Web. 17 May 2018. <a href="https://www.sciencefriday.com/articles/the-bodybuilder-oliver-sacks-days-on-muscle-beach/">https://www.sciencefriday.com/articles/the-bodybuilder-oliver-sacks-days-on-muscle-beach/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Strossen, Randall J. Chuck Ahrens: rest in peace. Ironmind. 26 Jan 2010. Web. 17 May 2018. <a href="http://ironmind.com/news/Chuck-Ahrens-Rest-in-Peace/">http://ironmind.com/news/Chuck-Ahrens-Rest-in-Peace/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Vuono, Pete. Chuck Ahrens - Pete Vuono. 22 Nov 2011. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2011/11/chuck-ahrens-pete-vuono.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2011/11/chuck-ahrens-pete-vuono.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Willoughby, David P. <i>The Super-Athletes</i>. South Brunswick: AS Barnes and Company, 1970. </span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com33tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-38702551215709364102018-05-17T10:32:00.001-04:002018-05-22T13:00:34.368-04:00A Public Service Announcement from Bruce Randall: "For Fuck's Sweet Sake. Bulk First, Then Worry About Getting Cut."<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bruce Randall went from nothing to fat badass to shredded ladies man in three years, natty af. Begin the naysaying, skinny-fat internet nobodies!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Having been positively besieged with questions over the years asking how lean a person should be before bulking, I thought it was high time to introduce a new generation to the modern human marvel- Bruce Randall, a strongman, powerlifter, and bodybuilder famous in the 1950s for making an insane amount of progress in a very short period of time. I realize that it's all the rage to traipse through your fitness club in skin tight capri pants and a melon colored string tank top, checking out your abs between lackadaisical sets of whatever Jeff Seid happens to be recommending these days, but if you actually want to impress real, live people when you walk down the street as a physically imposing and impressive motherfucker, chicken breasts, kale, and P90x isn't going to fucking cut it.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And before we delve in, bear this in mind:</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"We must remember that although testosterone was being manufactured by 1935, it was almost never used by people in the iron game. Remember also that 1957 was several years before Bill March, Tony Garcy, and Lou Riecke— aided by John Ziegler— introduced anabolic steroids to the strength sports in this country. Dianabol was not manufactured until 1958" (Neece).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bob Hines, Bruce Randall, and Abe Goldberg outside of Goldberg's gym.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">I realize that for anyone reading this while rocking </span>athleisure<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> clothing, this revelation will come as a fucking shocker, but it's true. The only person of whom I can think who successfully shreds and then lean bulks is Sylvester Stallone, cited above. As such, I am not saying it is not possible to do, but it's a mostly idiotic way to go about things for most people. A far better example to follow would be a person like the wrestler </span><a href="http://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2018/05/full-fucking-redux-baddest.html" target="_blank">Bruno Sammartino</a><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">, who gained over 100 lbs of muscle in 4 years and set a bunch of lifting records while doing it, or the man pictured above, Bruce Randall. Bulking hard and then cutting allows you to overeat like crazy to pack on muscle, which is easy enough to hang onto if you keep your protein high.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Sylvester Stallone- the reigning world champion of cutting and then bulking. "[W]hen I did Rambo III, I didn’t like the way I looked anymore, so I decided to reshape myself. I went down to 168 pounds. I put on weight slowly and got sinewy, hard-cut muscles. I wound up weighing about 200. But it was all muscle – my body fat was down to 3.8 percent. Now my fat count is 6.8. I’m 5’10? and weight 187 pounds. I’m pleased with my body now" (Davis).</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So, having already written about Sammartino's methods, allow me to introduce you to Bruce Randall- at 6'2", his weight ranged anywhere from 183 to 401lbs. In the course of his career, the man managed to gain world renown for his strength, then gained even more renown for shredding like crazy and winning the Mr. Universe title against some renown strongmen in 1959. The thing that made him stand out in my mind (for which I unfortunately couldn't find a citation) is neither of those things, though- it's that once he cut down he was so unaccustomed to his own strength that he grabbed a bench to do some benching and noticed everyone staring at him. When he set the bench down, he realized the fucking thing had been bolted into the ground, but he was able to rip it out of its moorings with no more effort than what it took to pick up a bench.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">I highly doubt any of you have made gains or losses that even slightly compare to those, <i>so you goddamned well better pay attention.</i> As to the tilt, the image was cockeyed and I'm working on a Chromebook, so that's the best you're getting.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Before we get going, I know half of you are going to call bullshit on his weights and progress, but the dude was heavily documented by Iron Man magazine the entire time. The other half of you are going to talk shit about his programs, because the knee jerk reaction for people these days is to say "that's horseshit and you're a lying pussy" rather than actually considering the implications of what you are reading actually might teach you something, rather than just reinforcing what you <i>think</i> you know. That said, let's delve into the story of a man whose life tale is so tall it's like Mark Henry and Johnny Appleseed doubleteamed Calamity Jane to create a man who makes Paul Bunyan seem like a punk bitch in comparison.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Bruce Randall was a professional bodybuilder and insanely strong guy who leapt into the public eye early in life and disappeared from public view just as quickly. Born in 1931, Randall didn't actually start lifting until he was of legal drinking age, and only did so at 21 because he needed to weigh 225lbs to play for the base football team in the Marines. Approaching the base lifting coach, Chief Petty Officer Walter Metzler, Randall explained he needed to pack on mass as quickly as possible so he could go out and be the crazy white Lawrence Taylor of the armed services. So at a bodyweight of 203lbs, Randall began his training with weird as hell program and a ingeniously simple diet that initially just included an extra loaf of bread, quart of milk, pork chop, or whatever he could get during every meal (Randall and Roach).</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Clearly, that dietary methodology is so simple a six year old could have figured it out, but frankly it never once occurred to me to try that sort of thing- luckily for all of us, it's never too late to try to pack on 30 lbs of mass in six weeks. His program was also incredibly simple, and although you'll all hate it, his methodology was sound. Having grown up in an era where you're gonna get mocked for skipping legs, you would likely all write a beginner program based around the Olympic lifts or power lifts in an effort to engage as many muscle groups as possible. Randall, on the other hand, said fuck that noise. Instead of doing some lame fucking 5x5 program wherein you are allegedly going to get jacked off three days of lackluster lifting a week, Randall did the following program 6-7 days a week. His logic? "I found that in my case I could work on my arms almost every day and make gains. I assume that this is due to the natural recuperative powers of the arms. Because they are always in use they seem to be able to regain total strength with just one night’s rest and are ready for more the next day" (Randall). In short- you can make serious hypertrophy progress training your arms every day like a fucking maniac, but the same couldn't be said for a program comprised of squats and deadlifts. You'd fall apart faster than a scarecrow in a tornado.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b><u>Randall's 1st Program, Aka the "Curls for the Girls" Routine</u></b></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Military style barbell curls – 110 pounds, 3 sets of 6-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dumbbell concentration curls – 50 pounds, 3 sets of 6-5 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">French style barbell curls – 70 pounds, 3 sets of 6-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bent-over triceps extension with dumbbells – 35 pounds, 3 sets of 6-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dumbbell incline curls – 45 pounds, 3 sets of 6-8 reps (with an arm hanging over a gymnastic horse)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">His weights are the weights he started the program with, so a couple of years of chopping wood prior to starting this program definitely paid off as unplanned preparation for lifting. He'd start with six reps per set, and as he grew stronger he would wait until he hit eight reps for all three sets, then increase the weight and start back at six. With this program and diet, Bruce Randall's progress was nothing short of pants-shitting (both figuratively and likely literally). In six weeks, he increased his weight from 203 lbs to 225 lbs and his arms grew from arms increased from 16” to 17.5”. Because football was still a few months off, Randall decided to change his goal to gain another 25lbs using the same routine and diet, and he got his weight up to 265lbs.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Clearly, this kind of weight gain and progress is just fucking ridiculous, but it should immediately indicate to every motherfucking last one of us that we eat like Angelina Jolie and we need to level the fuck up at the dinner table. Lest you think I am suggesting that we all should get fat as shit to pack on mass, I'm not. There is a happy medium between gaining 200 lbs in two years and applying similar principles to this in order to quickly gain mass, or to smash through sticking points (and there is definitely evidence that our collective sticking points are due in large part to eating like fucking hummingbirds.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Can you imagine someone posting a pic of this now? The internet would go crazy screaming shit like "fake plates" and "snap city"</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">So at 265lbs, Randall decided it was time to take his diet to the next level and alter his training to involved the larger muscle groups. The following just the basis of his training, and he would add exercises as time permitted. Again, he started with three sets of each exercise, dropping the starting reps to 3-5, and adding weight when he hit 8 reps. His starting weights were still light, but recall at that point lifters had to clean the weight to their chests and fall back into a high incline board for incline barbell press, which definitely increased the level of difficulty considerably. He took as long as he felt he needed in between sets, often lifting from 3-5 hours a day.</span></span><br />
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<b style="font-size: x-large;"><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Randall's 2nd Program</span></u></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Dumbbell Bench Press – 120 pounds, 5-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Decline Dumbbell Bench Press – 130 pounds, 5-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Incline Barbell Press – 250 pounds, 5-8 reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Good Morning – 295 pound, 3-5 reps</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If you are wondering, like I was, why the squat still wasn't in this program, I have your answer right here:</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"Randall originally shied away from the squat because of a serious injury there years previously in which he broke his leg in seven places. He would periodically test his strength in the movement and attributed the hard work in the good morning exercise for allowing him to squat 680lbs. He actually once took a shot at a 750lbs good morning, but had to drop the bar because the weights shifted on him" (Roach).</span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">It was with this program, just under a year into lifting, that he managed to win an Olympic weightlifting competition, in spite of the fact he trained less for it than most people train for fun runs. In December of 1953, 11 months after he started training, Randall entered his first meet, the Capital District, and won with a 300lb press, 230lb snatch, 315lb clean and jerk, and 845lb total. </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXb0Yr0YaWuFFl-FyEN4G9h5CWBcT0yHiNG10MtXr5DgkwZAb-6p2elHry5WRBcKEgzK2jPLOaeyhwmX7v9JmeCvwyk1u1AVbIrre-mCTrFbp45QqIVAUY51omeOVSFNoxR8K3DffkzpPU/s1600/med_1186689264-bruce_randall.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="213" data-original-width="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXb0Yr0YaWuFFl-FyEN4G9h5CWBcT0yHiNG10MtXr5DgkwZAb-6p2elHry5WRBcKEgzK2jPLOaeyhwmX7v9JmeCvwyk1u1AVbIrre-mCTrFbp45QqIVAUY51omeOVSFNoxR8K3DffkzpPU/s1600/med_1186689264-bruce_randall.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">As his training evolved to suit his heavier training with more compound lifts, so did his diet. Centered around four massive meals (a cafeteria tray filled to overflowing with rice and pork for dinner, or a breakfast of his typical breakfast, consisting of 28 fried eggs, loaf and half of bread and two quarts of milk) a day, at 6:30am, 11:30am, 4:30pm, and 9:30pm. Between meals he didn't snack beyond drinking milk, of which he drank a fucking unreal amount (8-10 quarts on average). When I say unreal, I'm talking unicorns that fart cinnamon and sneeze rainbows unreal- at least one time he drank nearly five gallons in a day, which gave him almost 15,000 calories and 600 grams of protein just by themselves (Roach).</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“I remember one incident that happened to me at lunch. I weighed about 330 at the time and came to lunch ready to eat like a horse. They were serving a favorite Chinese dish of mine, fried rice with pork. It happened that I was eating at the Navy mess hall at the time and so had a metal tray with five different compartments in it to eat from. Well, I filled the entire tray with rice and pork. The mound was so high that if another spoonful was added it would run over the side of the tray. Carefully balancing the tray so as not to drops a precious grain, I made my way back to a table amid incredulous stares from every sailor in the hall. Upon sitting down and tasting a few spoonfuls I found the rice to be slightly undercooked. The center of each grain was a little pasty and absorbed all the moisture in my mouth when I chewed. In order to solve this frustrating dilemma, I secured several quart bottles of water and proceeded to eat the rice with a swig of water every so often. Under this procedure I was able to finish the entire tray of fried rice and pork (I made it an absolute rule to finish everything I took. Wasting food is an unpardonable sin!). Upon getting up, I was, to put it mildly, sufficiently filled. When I arrived back at the Marine Barracks I found myself feeling rather strange sensations going on in the region of my stomach. I made a hasty retreat to my bed and lay upon my back for five hours taking short panting breaths because I found that deep breathing caused even more pressure on the stomach. Thereafter I made quite certain that the rice was well cooked before I loaded up the tray" (Randall and Roach)</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0cAxJa2JEfWX8hxCeVhtAsDyUliPO3neX3Xk_QDWPcEOwVyT-KrJ-4zqDSIWQShO9Hzxee6Us62UQV8A7SnWi3gniRhpQ6_HCE6pEUxREq9nBp2khb6GWbrpNtUrF3i5Rq_mdFbxX5n-T/s1600/2896_7_11-bruce-randall-bodybuilder.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="582" data-original-width="461" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0cAxJa2JEfWX8hxCeVhtAsDyUliPO3neX3Xk_QDWPcEOwVyT-KrJ-4zqDSIWQShO9Hzxee6Us62UQV8A7SnWi3gniRhpQ6_HCE6pEUxREq9nBp2khb6GWbrpNtUrF3i5Rq_mdFbxX5n-T/s1600/2896_7_11-bruce-randall-bodybuilder.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Those of you who remember the <a href="http://chaosandpain.blogspot.com/2011/08/cant-gain-weight-guess-what-youre-doing.html" target="_blank">Saxon Trio's eating habits</a> will note even they would have thought this was just an egregious amount of food and milk, and the man's bedroom must have smelled like a Turkish bathhouse in which Gary Busey and Nick Nolte had been doing squats. If you slept in a sewer you probably would have breathed better than you could in this man's room. And Randall gave less fucks than Deadpool donkeypunching Gina Carano in the middle of a child sex ring- he actually once said that if he'd pushed his weight to 500lbs he could have deadlifted 1000lbs (Roach).</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIMd_FWrmbaL7E_zb4okQH6e8Yr9Da28oS6F3lVMybA1fya6VeydatxyMUFuZYuopGSWdrPHcl8HGLqouT9xiwg2PJnzVV6mLm-qJVC6Hkk6lrTc0F7zL1zpJxZ6qlCIJne9l4Ls1406Uq/s1600/oaj6yROzLz9cOQMoB8YFuTl72eJkfbmt4t8yenImKBVvK0kTmF0xjctABnaLJIm9.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="280" data-original-width="467" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhIMd_FWrmbaL7E_zb4okQH6e8Yr9Da28oS6F3lVMybA1fya6VeydatxyMUFuZYuopGSWdrPHcl8HGLqouT9xiwg2PJnzVV6mLm-qJVC6Hkk6lrTc0F7zL1zpJxZ6qlCIJne9l4Ls1406Uq/s1600/oaj6yROzLz9cOQMoB8YFuTl72eJkfbmt4t8yenImKBVvK0kTmF0xjctABnaLJIm9.jpeg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Putting aside that Randall's bedroom must've smelled like a camel threw up eggs onto a pile of cow shit, and his bathroom was likely considered a Hazard Zone by every governmental agency in the country, we'll go back to his training. Randall said he never really had a "set" program, but he did specifically alter his training to the following, done five to six times a week:</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0dM9L8ZE3OhONiwWDAYSRpAeGKr_0y2XXk12mEpbLAS6Oz8oBZPZKBS_fMX1BD2z0Lerg5QURDuLgf2qdJ5Ks8CPOrtYip6xPzwawGVRA-jzlMKwSvcmkxvQKzsilSn_i0V1LHTemF5aq/s1600/med_1219872528-Randall_with_330.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="321" data-original-width="400" height="256" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0dM9L8ZE3OhONiwWDAYSRpAeGKr_0y2XXk12mEpbLAS6Oz8oBZPZKBS_fMX1BD2z0Lerg5QURDuLgf2qdJ5Ks8CPOrtYip6xPzwawGVRA-jzlMKwSvcmkxvQKzsilSn_i0V1LHTemF5aq/s320/med_1219872528-Randall_with_330.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Incline Clean and Press (pictured above) – 3x3-5, 355 lbs.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Quarter Front Squat – 3x6-8, 1,010 lbs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">DB Bench Press – 3x3-5, 205 lbs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">DB Decline Press – 3x3-5, 195 lbs.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Good Morning – 3x3-5, 565 lbs.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">His training kept changing from then on, rotating in and out various exercises (but usually keeping the total exercise count to six) that constantly ramped up the insanity as he tested his digestive system and his body's ability to adapt. By the time he had two years of training under his belt, Randall's lifts were among the best in the world at the time.</span></span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgexkTid27T8R5FRgY9CIQcxxK1ujGQ9SnaH7GAL1DnX-8oH08KNq9n9Qt_rDaMlyQXMo3NPU4qSca5bpvouitLWGGi5m78wDVpBrA15xEv3QlWOsCJ0wsIoZj44-DdYrm3PTvIkHxgCup3/s1600/e129a305ac6b7c7f7e278a16746272af.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1162" data-original-width="1600" height="464" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgexkTid27T8R5FRgY9CIQcxxK1ujGQ9SnaH7GAL1DnX-8oH08KNq9n9Qt_rDaMlyQXMo3NPU4qSca5bpvouitLWGGi5m78wDVpBrA15xEv3QlWOsCJ0wsIoZj44-DdYrm3PTvIkHxgCup3/s640/e129a305ac6b7c7f7e278a16746272af.jpg" width="640" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><u><b style="font-size: x-large;">Randall's Best Lifts </b><b>after 2 years of training, at 335-410lbs </b>(Greatest, </u>Willoughby 138)</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Military Press – 365lbs x two reps, 375 x one rep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Squat – 680lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Good Morning – 685lbs (Bent knees, back parallel to the floor)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Deadlift – 730lbs x two reps; 770 x one rep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Strict Curl – 242 lbs Dumbbell Bench Press – 220-pound dumbbells x two reps</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bench Press – 482lbs (with a 3-second pause on the chest)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Decline Dumbbell Bench Press – 220lb dumbbells x one rep</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">¼ Front Squat – 1,320lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Incline Clean and Press – 380lbs x three reps, 410 x one rep</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It seems that his switch in diet happened basically on a whim he mentioned to a friend, that he wanted to “look at life from the other side of the weight picture,” and his friend essentially told him he was out of his motherfucking mind, which only served to strengthen his resolve (Rader and Randall). I can respect that kind of motivation, because as I've written in the past, spite is an <i>amazing</i> motivator.</span></span><br />
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<span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>As far as I was concerned there is no such word as "never" in a lifter’s vocabulary.</b></span></span></div>
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<span style="text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">- Bruce Randall</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Taking up the challenge like a heroin addict takes up a fentanyl habit, Bruce knew he would have to immediately change both his diet and his routine. Interestingly, he had the exact opposite opinion about the matter than Arnold, though they both ended up at the same conclusion using the same simile. Whereas in <i>Pumping Iron</i> Arnold said, "you look in the mirror and you say, okay, I need a bit more deltoids ... so that the proportion's right, and ... you exercise and put those deltoids on, whereas an artist would just slap on some clay on each side," Bruce Randall said, "take a sculptor about to create a statue. He takes a big, ungainly piece of rock and with hammer and chisel he chips away at it until the desired effect is created" (Logan). At 401lbs, Randall saw himself as that big, ungainly piece of rock, and the weights and diet were his hammer and chisel. With that in mind, he reversed his previous methods and reduced his food intake at each meal, trying to keep his protein and green vegetables high while cutting back on starches and fats.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiJ4pBh6d_8UVrdhvm9Z5FVUTR9rUUZC471BH0v0PCK1GS8pemiRG3DtLL1x74_0-2W0QIpeZaG0LG4wJQnoTqzHzbxXH8x-QKXBWSntMN6qqdRbG5ZaBDpV9bQ_veFnLgbk-BLgdp7eLz/s1600/bruce-cut.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="400" data-original-width="241" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjiJ4pBh6d_8UVrdhvm9Z5FVUTR9rUUZC471BH0v0PCK1GS8pemiRG3DtLL1x74_0-2W0QIpeZaG0LG4wJQnoTqzHzbxXH8x-QKXBWSntMN6qqdRbG5ZaBDpV9bQ_veFnLgbk-BLgdp7eLz/s1600/bruce-cut.jpg" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">At the same time he reduced his food intake, he increased his volume in a way only a dangerously psychotic and probably self-destructive person would, training 6-7 hours a day (and once 27 hours in two days and 81 hours in that week), 6-7 days a week (and once 27 days in a row) doing more than 20 exercises with 4-5 sets of 12-15 reps apiece. He also started walking daily, gradually increasing his walks and pace until after a month he would walk/jog, and was running 3-5 miles a day by the end of his 9 month cut. And if you say that's going to kill your lifts, no it won't- you're just being an excuse-making pussy. According to the man himself, "I found that it did not adversely affect my workouts in the gym and in addition to the above mentioned benefits it increased my stamina and endurance greatly" (Logan).</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">His workout was as unconventional and volume dense-as-a-black-hole as you would guess:</span></span><br />
<b style="font-size: x-large;"><u><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Randall's "Reduction" Program</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Situps, leg raises, hanging leg raises – 20-50 reps.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Squats without weight – sets of 20.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Leg curls and extensions – sets of 25.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bench presses, flyes – sets of 15-20.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Chins, dips, curls, rows, upright rows – sets of 15-25.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Seated DB presses, incline presses – sets of 10-15.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">More situps, leg raises and hanging leg raises – sets of 25-50.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Miscellaneous optional exercises at the end of each workout.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXZhMuDqfwI97JBf8fEX33IHhDJaPS6RHBUcMoerpuLxOIUnG8FsRvE5InIIHLc4oXhJvohM-rHOyK15ZvR2dQFszrkkowi5wbXDUmx8y1-U3aylaM-aPEW6JBQg9L7gCJ1AtaKLNGohgV/s1600/Bruce-Randall.01.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="289" data-original-width="341" height="271" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiXZhMuDqfwI97JBf8fEX33IHhDJaPS6RHBUcMoerpuLxOIUnG8FsRvE5InIIHLc4oXhJvohM-rHOyK15ZvR2dQFszrkkowi5wbXDUmx8y1-U3aylaM-aPEW6JBQg9L7gCJ1AtaKLNGohgV/s320/Bruce-Randall.01.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Randall at the end of his cut, weighing 187lbs.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">If that's not insane enough for you, his 1956 New Years resolution was to do 5.000 situps a day for the first 15 days of 1956.... in addition to all of the other ab training he did. He credited that with his waspish waist, which was an amazingly trim 33", and whatever else it did, that resolution confirmed that the man was indeed crazier the Heath Ledger Joker on angel dust and flakka. He did, however, say that in retrospect his reps and should have been reversed (ahhh, sweet vindication):</span></span><br />
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<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"<b>I prefer to REDUCE the repetitions and INCREASE the number of sets.</b> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">To illustrate the above point let us take the following example. Instead of performing 3 sets of 20 repetitions per exercise, I would prefer to perform 10 sets of 6 repetitions per exercise when training for definition. Let us say that we were able to do 3 sets of 20 reps with 100 pounds in the curl. Now, if we were to increase the sets to 10 and reduce the reps to 6 we would be able to increase the weight substantially to, let us say, 150 pounds! The point is that at the end of the exercise we have performed exactly the same amount of repetitions. <b>However, on the high set, low rep principal, we use 50% more weight thus accomplishing more work and therefore burning more energy which is necessary in order to reduce fat and attain definition.</b> </span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Remember, it is the amount of energy you have burned up which in turn is determined by the amount of work you have performed that will determine the amount of fat reduction. This approach to definition should also enable the trainee to retain a great degree of muscle density, at the same time encouraging greater definition. The writer is not suggesting that the reader follow the idea of 10 sets necessarily. It is true that the more sets you perform the longer will be the length of your workout. It is also true, however, that it is necessary to put in many long workouts in order to bring the body around to top contest condition. Ask any top physique winner and you will find that this is true" (Randall).</span></blockquote>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtMWrTYdZ_2hOBOANPXwRUtjsohungWHJRcWg7YG2d_-tJ8mcbPaZkZrPNsu5hQ5FMfbClKtNz7FR0mRtziRp7sE-JpSxQqDgiNJ5WaJpGCQdKWMj_0gsPt5IKUW_o2silcXrJImLupjNH/s1600/Bruce+Randal+1959+Mr+Universe+225lbs.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="549" data-original-width="604" height="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtMWrTYdZ_2hOBOANPXwRUtjsohungWHJRcWg7YG2d_-tJ8mcbPaZkZrPNsu5hQ5FMfbClKtNz7FR0mRtziRp7sE-JpSxQqDgiNJ5WaJpGCQdKWMj_0gsPt5IKUW_o2silcXrJImLupjNH/s320/Bruce+Randal+1959+Mr+Universe+225lbs.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bruce in 1959 at 225 lbs</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the end, Bruce Randall was eating like most kids online claim they're eating when they "literally can't eat another thing." How those kids have such tiny appetites almost as big a mystery as how the formerly competitive-eater level Randall got his food intake down that low. By the time Randall was down to 183 in 1956, he was eating the following:</span></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Breakfast</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">2 soft boiled eggs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Plain pint of skim milk</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Glass of orange juice</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Apple</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Lunch</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Salad, dates and nuts</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Dinner</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Round Steak</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Two vegetables</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Quart skim milk with additional powdered milk</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Gelatin</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Coffee (Occasionally)</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzqB_mwBwZx5caGqaNjdUh9a_01uHpv8WaGzQzBbclaeMcJajcDyjDEkYdJj04iaZNh33ts_rS8rB2Zx0ec7PIeMuGbtSKLt6zkzyNU7P04R1EJekznyW-9wnOEjKQsgX_abg3FheiE5J2/s1600/Bruce-Randall.04.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="549" data-original-width="604" height="290" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzqB_mwBwZx5caGqaNjdUh9a_01uHpv8WaGzQzBbclaeMcJajcDyjDEkYdJj04iaZNh33ts_rS8rB2Zx0ec7PIeMuGbtSKLt6zkzyNU7P04R1EJekznyW-9wnOEjKQsgX_abg3FheiE5J2/s320/Bruce-Randall.04.jpg" width="320" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">As you can see below, his first couple of competitions didn't go quite as well as Bruce Randall would have liked- but the man remained undeterred. When he stepped onstage in 1956, Bruce had increased his weight up to 219 lbs., continuing his bizarre weight yo-yo. In 1957, Randall took a different tack and went lighter, coming in 6th weighing 195 lbs. At that point he was walking around at a much more reasonable 203lbs-240lbs in the offseason, and won in 1959 weighing 231lbs, four pounds lighter and an inch shorter than Arnold Schwarzenegger, who would win it nine years later.</span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Bruce Randall's Competition History</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1956 – Mr. America – AAU, 13th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1957 – Mr. America – AAU, 6th</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1958 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Tall, 2nd</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1959 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Tall, 1st</span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1959 – Universe – Pro – NABBA, Overall Winner</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-size: large; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“I constantly put personal goals before myself and these goals acted as a stimulus of sorts. In other words, I would set a date, perhaps three weeks hence, when I would try to accomplish some change such as a loss of 12 pounds or a reduction around the chest or waist of several inches. This idea of using goals is something that I learned when I was gaining weight and strength. I would tell myself that at a certain date I would press or deadlift, etc., such a poundage. Thus I found myself constantly challenged and I love challenges!" (Randal and Rader).</span></span></blockquote>
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">And that is essentially where the Bruce Randall story ends. He fell off the map and no one really heard from him again. Likely, he burnt himself out and just didn't have it in him to keep training. On top of that, his unconventional methods and ridiculous training volume lent themselves about as well to coaching athletes as John Belushi's party practices would have lent themselves to leading AA meetings. In any event, the man is a fucking textbook on how a zero-fucks-given attitude and big brass balls can push you to the forefront of the strength game... and that the bullshit about yo-yo dieting killing you faster than a diet of plutonium will. Randall lived to the ripe old age of 87, probably just to prove one unnecessarily awesome point.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">A couple of gems Randall had for people regarding training were (Randall):</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“I did do one exercise during this time which may have had some influence on my squat. This was the good morning exercise. When I reached over 400 lbs. on this exercise I found that I could not do the exercise in the strict sense because I had to band at the knees in order to compensate for the weight at the back of the neck. I made 685 in this manner with my back parallel to the floor and once almost made 750 but was forced to dump it because of a shift in the weight."</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">“I found the ¼ Front Squats helped me push-press heavy weights and believe it to be a fine exercise." </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">When cutting- “I use powdered milk and skim milk mixed together, thus increasing the protein content. I also took coffee at times finding it tended to curtail my appetite."</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Just as Mac from It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia said about his season-long weight gain, Randall felt good at his heaviest. "Actually, I felt fine when weighing 400 pounds but found that I perspired freely and had a bit of trouble getting about the city. Of course I needed great amounts of sleep and food. My food bill (early ‘50s) was never under $80 per week and very often well over $100. I know that if I wanted to gain again I could weight 500 lbs. in 18 months time." </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">On doing anything you believe you can- "Many people say that added weight is not necessary to become stronger. Perhaps they are right, but in my case it was necessary <b><u>because I believed it was</u>.</b>" </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">"I would suggest that those who find it difficult to refrain from the cake pie and candy routine remind themselves that each candy bar will cost them another 500 situps to work off! I found this to be a very persuasive means of combating temporary dietary temptations!"</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Finally, all you Zyzz and Jeff Seid loving motherfuckers out there take note- "<b>Remember that anyone can have the definition he desires if he is willing to train and will apply a little “exercise” of the will power. In conclusion I think it might be wise to add that there is a time to be extremely defined and a time not to be quite so defined.</b> I feel that it is unwise to maintain an extreme degree of definition for great lengths of time because, by reducing the body fat to an absolute minimum, one also reduces his resistance and may subject his body to colds and many other possible illnesses."</span></li>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmxbh6B2FsyAxq8-RxY-P0n86_CrkI6rWFlQFIX7VBJOQ5JC_6Px4BEp31YyOmjtrTvtC2WRPUdNqHl7enZnSRlb7ToBJWJ_AhqhyN_TMSR70qQnBVTVMD5OqOwYGmqUNkn94UQsZ4LjiP/s1600/4++Mr+Universe+Bruce+Randall+++YouTube+%25281%2529.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"><img border="0" data-original-height="438" data-original-width="623" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmxbh6B2FsyAxq8-RxY-P0n86_CrkI6rWFlQFIX7VBJOQ5JC_6Px4BEp31YyOmjtrTvtC2WRPUdNqHl7enZnSRlb7ToBJWJ_AhqhyN_TMSR70qQnBVTVMD5OqOwYGmqUNkn94UQsZ4LjiP/s1600/4++Mr+Universe+Bruce+Randall+++YouTube+%25281%2529.png" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">So what have we learned? First, we learned once again that you form Nazis out there can take a big step back and literally fuck your own faces. We also learned that literally anything is possible if you set your mind to it and go ball-to-the-fucking-wall. Finally, it should also seem fairly obvious to anyone paying attention that bulking at the outset to build strength and size makes far more sense than trying to achieve and maintain Instagram-ready abs at all times. Frankly, I wish I'd dirty bulked in my formative years so I could maintain a higher set-point of muscle mass, rather than constantly scraping and scratching to gain a little muscle every year on a diet of rice and chicken... plus, pizza is fucking delicious. A bit of food for thought, at least...</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><b>"Singleness of mind and the will power to stick to something with the courage to go on in spite of what people might say is a great factor to success."</b></span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: medium;"><b>By the way, big ups to Antonio Jacopo Campaner for reminding me of this guy's name.</b></span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Bruce Randall. Greatest Physiques. Web. 8 May 2018.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> <a href="https://www.greatestphysiques.com/bruce-randall/">https://www.greatestphysiques.com/bruce-randall/</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Christopher, Logan. Bruce Randall. Legendary Strength. 8 Oct 2013.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Web. 8 May 2018. <a href="https://legendarystrength.com/bruce-randall/">https://legendarystrength.com/bruce-randall/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Davis, Chris. Sylvester Stallone workout: Rocky & Rambo. Pop Workouts. 21 Feb 2016. Web. 16 May 2018. <a href="https://www.popworkouts.com/sylvester-stallone-workout-rocky-rambo/4/">https://www.popworkouts.com/sylvester-stallone-workout-rocky-rambo/4/</a></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Heffernan, Conor. Bruce Randall and the most amazing transformation in bodybuilding. Physical Culture Study. 1 Jun 2016. Web. 30 Apr 2018. <a href="https://physicalculturestudy.com/2016/06/01/bruce-randall-and-the-most-amazing-transformation-in-bodybuilding/">https://physicalculturestudy.com/2016/06/01/bruce-randall-and-the-most-amazing-transformation-in-bodybuilding/</a></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Neece, S. Some lesser known strongmen of the Fifties and Sixties. Iron Game History. 1998 May; 5(1):16-25. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Randall, Bruce. Definition, That Elusive Quality. Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 30 Apr 2009. Web. 30 Apr 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/04/definition-that-elusive-quality-bruce.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2009/04/definition-that-elusive-quality-bruce.html</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Randall, Bruce and Peary Rader. How Bruce Randall Trained- Up and Down to a Mr. Universe Title (1957). Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 24 Aug 2008. Web. 30 Apr 2018. <a href="https://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/08/how-bruce-randall-trained-randall-rader.html">https://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2008/08/how-bruce-randall-trained-randall-rader.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Roach, Randy. the amazing transformation of Bruce Randall. Iron Game History. Aug 2008. Web. 8 May 2018. <a href="https://www.starkcenter.org/static/igh/articles/igh10.3.23.pdf">https://www.starkcenter.org/static/igh/articles/igh10.3.23.pdf</a></span></span></div>
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Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com63tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5835524249360195666.post-10561308359688875402018-05-07T16:01:00.002-04:002018-05-07T16:18:40.779-04:00[Full Fucking Redux] Baddest Motherfuckers Ever- Bruno "The Italian Superman" Sammartino<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">[Here is what amounts to a complete rewrite of my Bruno Sammartino article- I found much more information on the man, and the guy is such a goddamned legend he deserves <i>far</i> better than my original article. So before I post another one or two articles this week, I thought this man deserved a tribute befitting the superhuman he was.]</span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: x-large;">Rest in Brutality, Bruno Sammartino </span></div>
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<span style="color: red; font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">10/6/1935-4/8/2018</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Back in the day, if a guy was a wrestler, he was a bona-fide badass. The sport, which grew out of what were essentially MMA fights with less striking and more wrestling (catch style), was filled with bad motherfuckers who ate big, lifted big, and lived big. They were living proof that the Paul Bunyans and Spring Heeled Jacks and other men with skills so mad that they are often considered the fanciful bullshit of legends or conspiracy could have actually existed. I realize that the same cannot be said for the modern era of wrestlers, since other than the Rock being ridiculously jacked and charismatic, none of them seem larger-than-life to the point of being supernatural. Back in the day, however, it was commonplace to hear stories like the fact that Andre the Giant drank 106 beers in a night, or Ken Patera and Masa Saito beat the shit out of 16 cops at once and then missed the verdict of their court case because they were out at a bar getting drunk and asleep in the courtroom, respectively, or any of another dozen wrestlers one could name off the top of their head who did shit better than the rest of us to a point where it isn't just not a competition- we're just participating in two different universes with two entirely different types of physics (Schwartz, Professor). </span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMcG6Awj-8_1JWxgNDm3RBrOlOjjUjymmc8DkwZQoD6OgDTdVcR1tcHvyx4e8y1E8vlRbiU0FFd5K0ijNberT3QfQtOYKp7kc-qU7AoDFnIb4Cc6FS1ybwiB4r_2qUjf0gCYUkz0Xs9iY/s1600/sammartino1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiMcG6Awj-8_1JWxgNDm3RBrOlOjjUjymmc8DkwZQoD6OgDTdVcR1tcHvyx4e8y1E8vlRbiU0FFd5K0ijNberT3QfQtOYKp7kc-qU7AoDFnIb4Cc6FS1ybwiB4r_2qUjf0gCYUkz0Xs9iY/s400/sammartino1.jpg" width="394" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">It was from this era that the longest reigning WWE Champion in history, holding the WWE Title for 2,803 consecutive days, known as the Italian Superman came. Bruno Sammartino, who presided over what he perceived as wrestling's fall into "the chemical years" (of which Hulk Hogan's apparently the evil figurehead), was so beloved by Italians and wrestling fans that they went quite literally berserk when a a heel who turned on him, stabbing him, smashing his cars, flipping over his cabs on the way to fights, and at one point a mobster friend of Frank Sinatra's even offered to shoot "Classy" Freddie Blassie on Sammartino's behalf. Saying Bruno Sammartino was the ultimate babyface is like saying that <a href="http://www.wrestlezone.com/assets/uploads/2016/10/Ellsworth.jpg" target="_blank">James Ellsworth is the least physically impressive wrestler of the modern era</a>- it goes without saying, and seems like an understatement even as it's somewhat hyperbolic.</span><br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXNFHtiy68wsAmzZoj1xZUSpySUw851nhKwe6NrBWlve_FVRyEBReBIC9RJwr1cwQrB7EfK0KeUCHnUfLkJDQ7yIMsJsW-Pxk-t9PSlCzwgO5_L6mZyr2P6feQkTeLMI1VRNe-B3_II4/s1600/img001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEghXNFHtiy68wsAmzZoj1xZUSpySUw851nhKwe6NrBWlve_FVRyEBReBIC9RJwr1cwQrB7EfK0KeUCHnUfLkJDQ7yIMsJsW-Pxk-t9PSlCzwgO5_L6mZyr2P6feQkTeLMI1VRNe-B3_II4/s400/img001.jpg" width="400" /></span></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Bruno was an Italian immigrant who had spent two years in the arctic environs of mountains of Italy (from age 7 to 9) running around like Brendan Fraser in <i>Encino Man</i> with a sharp stick and dining on dandelions and wild animals (DeLuca). Yeah, so when you're telling your fucking sob story on Instagram about how a rough childhood and broken home are the reason you have a sub 350lb bench, <b>take a big step back and literally fuck your own face</b>, because big Bruno was so malnourished in his formative years that he only weighed 80 lbs at age 15. That year, Sammartino arrived in the US, the docs prescribed him a diet of meat and potatoes with a side of heavy lifting (holy shit, I was born in the wrong goddamned era) and shit proceeded to get real. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sammartino took to the weights like a stripper to cocaine, and competed in basically every single weightclass from 123 on up to heavyweight, which was his weightclass after only four years of lifting. </span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Let that sink in for a second- Sammartino lifted and ate so hard that he went from 80 lbs to 225 in four years with no steroids, so the next time you're watching some dickhead on Youtube screaming about how everyone's on steroids, just thumbs down that video, eat a fucking steak, and go bench press until your fucking eyes bleed. </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">By the time he was college-aged, the 16 year old 105lb neophyte lifter kid without a word of English in his vocabulary had become a fucking weight room monster with a scholarship offer for wrestling from the University of Pittsburgh, and went on to win a bunch of lifting titles. Sammartino basically treated being the best at everything the same way most people act when they're finishing a delicious sandwich- it was just what he did, and he neither sweated little shit nor bemoaned any "hard times" that befell him. One of his favorite memories is travelling to an annual <i>Strength and Health</i> picnic and competition in York, PA in 1957. In the era before people abandoned their pride and set up GoFundMes to pay for their travel costs, Sammartino <i>slept on a motherfucking park bench</i> and then proceeded to wipe he fucking platform with his competition. He then repeated that process over and over, and by the time he was 22 be had won Mr. Allegheny in bodybuilding, set a world record for the bench press, and boasted the following lifts:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">565lb Bench</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">625lb Squat</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">675lb Deadlift</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">365lb Olympic Press</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">270lb Snatch</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">370lb Clean and Jerk</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Bear in mind when viewing those numbers that powerlifting didn't officially exist at this time, and the power lifts were just three of 72 lifts contested in odd lift meets at the time- it's not as though these guys specialized in them unless they just loved the ever-loving shit out of them.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The man was an absolute Milo of Croton-style beast of a pro wrestler, and while looking like a beardless Zangief, he racked up the following sick accomplishments as a wrestler:</span><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">133 consecutive sell-outs in Madison Square Garden</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">75 consecutive main bouts in Boston Gardens.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">21 straight sell-outs in Australia (a record that may still stand)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">the largest crowd (90,000 people) in Japan (at least until 1972)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">the all-time record of 125,000 in India (at least until 1972)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">the only pro wrestler to sell out the Bull Fight Arena in Caracas (50,000 in attendance).</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">the record for total gates around the world (Deluca)</span></li>
</ul>
<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Bruno Sammartino's All-Time Best Lifts</span></u></b><br />
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<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 315lbs for 38 reps (Tatar)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 330lbs for 33 reps right after hitting a max of 500 for the day (Twichell)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press (Competition, with a flat back and two second pause)</b>- 565lbs</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Floor Press</b>- 545lbs (Willoughby 133)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict Curl</b>- 235lbs (Willoughby 138)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Olympic Press</b>- 410lbs (Willoughby 133)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Deadlift</b>- 705lbs (Willoughby 377), though he never trained it because he thought it was bad for the back (Twichell). </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat (Competition)</b>- 685lbs (Twichell)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Snatch</b>- 270lbs (both his snatch and clean and jerk were hamstrung by the fact his elbows wouldn't lock out fully, which he attributed to malnourishment while living in the Alps)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Clean and Jerk</b>- 370lbs</span></li>
</ul>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Not too fucking shabby, especially considering the fact that he was fanatically drug free and trained in a time before supplements, and he put up his 565 bench on a rickety homemade bench with no uprights (Tatar). His workouts were fucking legendary, and weren't spurred by anything but Sammartino's imagination, his defiance against gravity, and his titanic brass balls.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">He fueled his lengthy, brutal, and frequent workouts by eating his fucking ass off. At 5'11" and 270lbs, Bruno had to have been a big eater, and according to interviews, he'd routinely put away 24 lamb chops or four pounds of steak at one sitting and eat breakfasts of 12 eggs, a loaf of bread, a whole box of cereal, and two quarts of milk (Rouvalis). Arthur Saxon himself would have been proud of Sammartino's total unwillingness to approach the dinner table with anything but contempt for food, because at every meal Sammartino's goal was stuff as much food down his gullet as humanly possible. Obviously, Sammartino wasn't overly concerned with showing up at competitions ripped to fucking shreds- he was about looking so physically imposing his opponents had to wear Depends into the ring and with being so superhumanly strong he made legendary strongmen look like bitches. Given the fact he lifted 3 days a week, did calisthenics another two days a week, ran 8 miles a day, and wrestled six to seven days a week, however, Sammartino was training to a point where he'd likely have dropped dead of starvation eating any other way. As it stood, his diet was exactly what the doctor ordered, because Sammartino was so goddamned strong that he was capable of "doing amazing feats" at a moment's notice, like, press slamming 605lb Haystacks Calhoun so hard that he caved in the center of the ring (Deluca, Rouvalis). That is a feat even the legendary Paul Anderson couldn't pull off- at one point he tried to lift Haystacks and failed harder than Tara Reid at sobriety. </span><br />
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<b><u><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif; font-size: large;">Bruno Sammartino Vital Stats</span></u></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Height: 5'10"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Weight: 265lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Chest: 56"</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Arms: 20"</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">By this time, you and I are two wholly different species if you're not dying to know how he trained. In wild departure from the manner in which people approach training today, Sammartino didn't simply follow a bullshit, cookie-cutter program developed by and for candy asses- he honed a routine over the years that proved to be as successful as it was brutal. </span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"I was working out three, sometime three and a half, hours a day with weights. I would work out in the morning because I wanted to be very rested up for the wrestling matches at night. So I would do a workout, then have a light breakfast, and then I would go to bed for a few hours. I would eat an early dinner no later than 3:00 so that it would be fully digested by the time I went in the ring. So yeah, I worked out very hard and heavy, but I always used to try and take a couple hours nap afterward just to recoup and rest up" (Wuebben).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: x-large;"><u>Bruno Sammartino's Power Routine</u> </b><u>(Twichell)</u></span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b><br /></b></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 10 sets, working up in 2-rep jumps to his max (I'm guessing 2 sets of 10, 2 sets of 8, 2 x 6, 2 x 4, 1 x 2, 1 x 1). His 11th set was a death set with about 65% of his 1RM for the day.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Floor Press</b>- 5-7 x 3 with ~550lbs (see pic above, because it's different than what I've done as a floor press)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Dumbbell Presses</b>- 5 x 5 (heavy as <i>fuck- </i>when he was training with<i> </i>the legendary Karl Norberg he was using 150-pound dumbbells) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Incline Laterals</b>- 5 x 5 (again heavy enough to make your eyes bleed, 125-pound dumbbells)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Cheat Upright Rows</b>- 6 x 6-7 x 205lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>High Pulls</b> (to the navel)- 6 x 3-4 x 400-425lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squats</b>- 8 x 3-5 reps x 650lbs</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict/Military Barbell Curl</b>- 10 x 10 x 135 to 175 pounds (he'd also occasionally do cheat curls with 225)</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: x-large;"><u>Bruno Sammartino's Travel Routine</u> </b><u>(Twichell)</u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Because training is a bitch on the road, and Sammartino stopped squatting after a while because it hurt his agility and his knees, he had a routine of three basic exercises. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 10-12 x 3-5 starting around 300lbs and work up to a single with maximum poundage, followed by a death set. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Strict/Military Barbell Curl</b>- 10 x 10 x 135 to 175 pounds</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Standing Laterals</b>- I'm assuming 5x5 as above, but he didn't specify in the interview) </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b style="font-size: x-large;"><u>Bruno Sammartino's Beginners </u></b><b style="font-size: x-large;"><u>Routine </u></b></span><u>(Kubik)</u></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">In the pre-intenet era, everything was done through online courses or published in magazines. You know that shit-dog cookie-cutter course you bought off some nobody for far too much money? Well, think of correspondence courses as the same thing, except they almost invariably came from someone who had <i>actually accomplished</i> something in the strength world. The following routine was Sammartino's recommendation for beginners, so the volume is low. Everything is done with a single warmup set and followed by 3 sets of 6 reps. Weight work was done three times a week, with the bodyweight stuff done on two of the off days.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Squat</b>- 3 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 3 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Barbell Curl</b>- 3 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Behind the Neck Press</b>- 3 x 6</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Upright Rowing</b>- 3 x 6 (with a two second hold at the top)</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Sit-Ups</b>- 3 x 6</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">The bodyweight work for two off days (working up to sets of 100 on squat pushups and 15 on pullups):</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hindu Squats</b>- 1 or 2 sets </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Hindu Pushups</b>- 1 or 2 sets</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Behind the Neck Pull-Ups</b>- 2 sets</span><br />
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Calf Isometrics</span></b><br />
<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Neck Isometrics</span></b><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sammartino was even jacked at the age of 70.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sammartino kept training even into his old age, because that's what badasses do in retirement. The following is the routine he followed in the picture above, doing it three times a week along with a seven mile daily jog.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lat Pulldowns</b>- 5 x 15 x 130lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Lateral Raises</b>- 10 x 15 x 40lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bench Press</b>- 7 x 8 x 150-250lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Bench Press</b>- 5 x 10 x 100lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Dumbbell Curl</b>- 10 x 10 x 40lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Overhead Tricep Extension</b>- 4 x 15 x 40lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Leg Extensions</b>- 5 x 20 x 125-160 lbs</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Crunches</b>- 100</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Leg Raises</b>- 75</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Alternate Leg Raises</b>- 75</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Bicycles Crunches</b>- 100</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Crunches</b>- 100</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">By the time he was 77, Sammartino's routine had changed somewhat, but still outpaced your average 20-something athleisure-wearing Instragram superstar. Once a badass, always a badass, it seems: </span><br />
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">"Three days a week I do roadwork. I had hip replacement, and the doctors tell me I can walk as fast as I want, but I’m not allowed to run. So I power walk. I do between four and five miles. Then I come home – I have a well-equipped gym downstairs – and I do about 800 leg raises and leg crunches for stomach work, and then I stretch a little bit. And that’s it. The next day, I work out with the weights. Now, do I lift heavy weights anymore? No, I’m 77, and my weight is not 275 anymore. I’m 215 now, maybe 220 with my clothes on. For example, on bench press, I don’t go higher than maybe 215 for reps. For shoulder work I do 35-pound dumbbells for side laterals. Nothing really heavy anymore, because, #1, I’m old; #2, I’m not as heavy as I was; and #3, I don’t want to put too much stress on the joints at this stage of my life. I use weights that are comfortable for me" (Wuebben).</span></blockquote>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Lest you think Sammartino was simply a huge, strong guy and a pushover outside of the ring, that was about as far from the truth as any natty bro's vociferous claims about how natty they are. Sammartino was still willing to throw hands after he retired, and one of his backstage rumbles is fucking legendary. At the age of 51, Sammartino was a commentator rather than an announcer. Spying six large non-wrestlers backstage, Sammartino approached them and told them they were going to get in trouble with security. One of the six, a running back for the Pittsburgh Steelers, grabbed Sammartino's hand and tried to play the old hand-squishing game to "prove his dominance" in the same way pussies like Neo-Nazis and those fucking "men going their own way" would attempt to. Then the man uttered what were luckily not his last words, telling Sammartino he was washed up and sucker punching him. Sammartino, being the Italian Superman, knocked that motherfucker out with a single punch and proceeded to fight the other five single handedly, until the Iron Sheik jumped out of the shower and into the fracas bare-assed naked. The two of them proceeded to stomp the ever-loving fuck out of the six men and presumably went off to share a grilled steer and a couple kegs of beer (and given it was 1980's Iron Sheik, I'm guessing at least an 8-ball of coke).</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sammartino did not look small sandwiched between Sergio and Arnold, with whom he trained in the late 1960s.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Clearly, none of us are going to be Bruno Sammartino, because there's only one Italian Superman, and he just died. We can, however, do our best impression of that bad motherfucker and honor him by eating a hell of a lot more and training a hell of a lot more, because judging by the standard that man set in just four years of training, we have all failed to come within screaming distance of our potential. Nothing whatsoever should stand in your way in becoming the best possible version of yourself, and anything you tell yourself is a reason why you can't get huge and superhumanly strong is just a fucking excuse you're made because you're a whiny bitch.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"><b>Don't be a fucking bitch. Go make it happen.</b></span><br />
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<b><span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Sources:</span></b><br />
<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Deluca, Fred. Bruno Sammartino (1972). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 26 Nov 2010. Web 7 May 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/11/bruno-sammartino-fred-deluca.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2010/11/bruno-sammartino-fred-deluca.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Iron Sheik and Bruno Sammartino fight in locker room story. Youtube. 2 Mar 2009. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oLtJIx9ghM">https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3oLtJIx9ghM</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Kubik, Brooks. Old gold from the living legend. Dinosaur Training. 31 Jan 2012. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="http://dinosaurtraining.blogspot.com/2012/01/old-gold-from-living-legend.html">http://dinosaurtraining.blogspot.com/2012/01/old-gold-from-living-legend.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Kubik, Brooks. The top training program of 1969! Dinosaur Training. 7 Nov 2014. Web. 7 May 2018.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;"> <a href="http://dinosaurtraining.blogspot.com/2014/11/the-top-training-program-of-1969.html">http://dinosaurtraining.blogspot.com/2014/11/the-top-training-program-of-1969.html</a></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rance, Chasyn. Training. Chasyn Rance. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="http://www.chasynrance.com/training.htm">http://www.chasynrance.com/training.htm</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Rouvalis, Cristina. Wrestling with fame: Bruno Sammartino still a hero to fans. Pittsburgh Post-Gazette. 28 Oct 1998. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="http://old.post-gazette.com/magazine/19981028bruno1.asp">http://old.post-gazette.com/magazine/19981028bruno1.asp</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Schwartz, Nick. The most unbelievable Andre the giant drinking stories. Fox Sports. 27 Nov 2016. Web. 6 May 2018. <a href="https://www.foxsports.com/wwe/gallery/best-andre-the-giant-drinking-stories-072516">https://www.foxsports.com/wwe/gallery/best-andre-the-giant-drinking-stories-072516</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Tatar, Ben. Sport stars and celebrity bench press rumors. Critical Bench. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="http://www.criticalbench.com/pro-athletes-bench-press.htm">http://www.criticalbench.com/pro-athletes-bench-press.htm</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Twichell, Jon. Power training interview with Bruno Sammartino (1964). The Tight Tan Slacks of Dezso Ban. 24 Apr 2018. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2018/04/power-training-interview-with-bruno.html">http://ditillo2.blogspot.com/2018/04/power-training-interview-with-bruno.html</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Wrestling Professor. Ken Patera & Masa Saito vs Waukesha police department. 6 Aug 2016. Web. 6 May 2018. <a href="http://www.armpit-wrestling.com/ken-patera-masa-saito-vs-waukesha-police-department/">http://www.armpit-wrestling.com/ken-patera-masa-saito-vs-waukesha-police-department/</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Willoughby, David P. <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Super-Athletes-Record-Limits-Strength-Stamina/dp/0498066517" target="_blank"><i>The Super-Athletes</i></a>. New York: A.S. Barnes and Co, 1970.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">Wuebben, Joe. Old-school ass kicker Bruno Sammartino. Muscle and Fitness. 2013. Web. 7 May 2018. <a href="https://www.muscleandfitness.com/athletes-celebrities/interviews/old-school-ass-kicker-bruno-sammartino-extended-interview">https://www.muscleandfitness.com/athletes-celebrities/interviews/old-school-ass-kicker-bruno-sammartino-extended-interview</a></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , sans-serif;">WWE.com Staff. Nine things you need to know about Bruno Sammartino. WWE. 18 Apr 2018. Web. 8 May 2018. <a href="http://www.wwe.com/article/nine-things-you-need-to-know-about-bruno-sammartino">http://www.wwe.com/article/nine-things-you-need-to-know-about-bruno-sammartino</a></span></div>
Jamie Lewishttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16182869171233847161noreply@blogger.com37