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12 July 2010

Heavens! You Say I've Worked My Shoulders Too Many Times In a Week?!?!

One common criticism of my training methodology is the fact that I lack "balance" in my program design.  People point in particular to the fact that I have a primary emphasis on quadriceps and deltoids, to the detriment of everything else.  It's their contention, I suppose, that this creates muscular imbalances that will eventually manifest themselves in injuries.
Behold the awesome power of leg extensions. HAHAHAHA. 

Bullshit.  It's these same dunderheaded, magazine-reading, bro-science dripping goofballs who will pontificate endlessly about dumbbell bench presses, the utility of which ranges between negligible and nonsensical for most people.  For whatever reason, they seem to think that every exercise has precisely the same effect on everyone,  regardless of size, shape, relative strength levels, and leverages.  Additionally, they think everyone wants to look like whomever's in vogue on their ridiculous site that day, be it Francis Benefatto or Frank Zane or Steve Reeves or Arnold or whatever.  It's rare that you'll see strength training enthusiasts blather on about this, because they know better.
 
Stripper shoes + drinking + one arm deadlift with her tits out = always in vogue.  Probably what Valhalla would look like, only without the crossfitters. 

First and foremost, I take issue with the idea that any program should be based around bodyparts, and think it's fucking ridiculous that anyone would attempt to parse the body into individual parts.  Planes, maybe, I can see, but parts?  What bodypart does the power clean work, primarily? Most people would say, unequivocally, back.  Well, not for me- my powerclean is all traps and legs.  Since the back and traps are all part of the same basic bodypart, this is mere quibbling, but I'm trying to illustrate a point, alright?  Settle the fuck down.  Now, given my relative strength disparity between my traps and every other part of my body, it would stand to reason that they can handle a greater workload, and they'll take other nearby bodyparts out of the equation, wholly or in part, simply due to the fact that they're able to do so.  This will occur with anyone who has a dominant bodypart.  As such, 6 sets of cleans will hit my body in a wildly different way than they would a tall guy with a swimmer's build, leverages be damned.
Dmitri Klokov. 6', 231, and actually has good form.  He and are aren't hitting ANY of the same shit while doing snatches, or my amusing approximation thereof.

Which, of course, brings us to Biochemical Individuality.  You might think that one's biochemistry doesn't factor into this equation, but it's one's biochemistry and genetics that determines, by and large, bone length and density, one's dominant muscle fiber types (at least initially), location of insertion points for muscles (and thereby determine that muscle's length).  Given the massive disparity in organ size and placement, it stands to reason that one's musculature would also differ from everyone else's, as would their intramuscular production of ATP, rate of creatine utilization, neuromuscular efficiency, and the like.  Given that we know training alters the rate at which protein is absorbed in humans, and the rate of creatine utilization, we can thus derive further evidence of differentiation between the workload and the stress placed on a body by a given workload between individuals.  Thus, attempting to organize a program by bodypart seems like a remarkably simplistic systems, which could be described as insipid, ignorant, and lazy by anyone less inclined toward love for his fellow man than I.

Now that I've obliquely insulted virtually every person you've ever met, consider that athletes train exercises, by and large, and their physiques generally reflect the exercises they choose.  As the Bulgarians have insisted for decades, form follows function.  As such, it seems that the bodybuilders might be onto something, since they train ridiculously, and generally look ridiculous as well.  For anyone interested in moving weights in the gym, however, that sort of a methodology is patently absurd.  Certainly, training all of the same planes and movements would diminish one's ability to successfully complete lifts at a high percentage of one's 1RM, so maxing on bench, OHP, and BTN press in the same workout would be about as unproductive as something could be.  That's not to state, however, that training all three exercises in a rotation over the course of the week would be, however.

Next time, way more BI shit, a hell of a lot of insulting the cumulative intellects of bodybuilders, and hopefully more chicks of reasonably hot broads in strippers shoes, drinking and lifting simultaneously..

23 comments :

  1. excellent post jamie

    I like how you differentiated between working different bodyparts vs different planes of movement

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  2. Another awesome post mate. I was always one of the douches who focused on chest and arms. I then realised how lame a big bulging chest actually looks. Thus since adopting your methodologies i've only been using overhead variants for pressing and been doing a hell of a lot of cleans, shrugs and squats. Modern bodybuilding is the shittiest thing to ever happen to weight training.

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  3. I read your blog and follow your basic weight training methodologies, but I have a question. Since I am pretty tall and have long arms the bench press doesn't really hit mt chest at all. I still do CGB, but I substituted bench press with the chest machine. Do you think thats an alright substitution or could you recommend a beetter sustitution? Oh and I do weighted dips too.

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  4. I'd recommend keep focusing on weighted dips numerous times per week, that coupled with overhead pressing should help your chest grow. Benching never done shit for me other than making me bench more haha. Remember though a big chest isn't the key to a good physique.

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  5. Ah well, if he wants a big chest, he wants a big chest. Frankly, I've never had a massive chest, but I've found that dips are a far superior chest movement to benching. I think, though, that it'll just be trial and error that gives you your answer- that's what this post is about... everyone's different.

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  6. Well you've out gayed yourself...again.

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  7. Hey Jamie just wanted to say thanks for the info. Felt like a slacker yesterday but re-read "Dispense with the Bullshit" from March and then went to pull a 20lb PR in the deadlift. Good stuff man.

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  8. Thanks for the advice on the benching substitute. Personally i don't really like benching, I tend to focus on squats and clean variations. I just wanted to know if their was a better exercise than the bench. Thanks

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  9. Always nice of Rant to show up with one of his inarticulate comments. Well done (not), asshole.

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  10. (P. Diddy: Guess who's back, y'all. It's me, P. Diddy, here with the Asian Chaos and Pain himself. Yo Dracoy, lace us with one of those fresh rhymes.)
    Dracoy: Oh u want me 2 do this? Well...

    Let me tell u what it's like being motherlovin Dracoy.
    I live Chaos and Pain every moment of the day-coy,
    I eat mad protein, yeah I'm talking whey-coy,
    My kitchen is like a supplement buffet-coy.
    (P. Diddy: GNC what what what.)
    I've boned hundreds of ladies, they call me Mr. Fantastic,
    Because my wiener gets long like my flesh is elastic.
    I flip Boni's mom around like the lady's a gymnastic,
    Her vagina's alright, but her throat is bombastic.
    (P. Diddy: I know that's right.)
    And speaking of h8rs, Rant can eat my dick.
    It's only six inches long, but it's decently thick.
    When you messing with Jamie, you messing with his clique.
    We'll tear ur home down, I'm talkin brick by brick.
    (P. Diddy: Yo six inches is above average for an Asian dude.)

    Peace I'm out.
    Dracoy

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  11. there aren't enough D's, A's, M's and N's in the world to type the "DAMN" that is an appropriate response to the above rap.

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  12. BWAAAAAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAA.....

    Gotta love all the college kids with extra time on their hands....

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  13. Dracoy's a fucking comedic genius. You're disabusing us all of the notion that Asians are horribly unfunny (Margaret Cho, anyone?).

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  14. Dracoy. That was pretty fucking win.

    :D

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  15. I love Dracoy's comments more and more every time he posts.

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  16. Hahahaha...funny shit Dracoy.
    Last week I military pressed one day, benched the next, I was fine. My shoulders didn't explode from an imbalance.

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  17. WHERE ARE THE DRACOY SHIRTS?!

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  18. Dracoy = poser.

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  19. DRACOY'S VOICE MAIL 4 REALJuly 14, 2010 at 10:29 AM

    Hey Anonymous, Dracoy isn't here right now. Please leave a message at the beep, h8r.

    ReplyDelete
  20. douchebag, how many times are you going to pull out that one? it wasn't funny the first time.

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  21. Oh-oh, seems like not everybody is buying Dracoy's stand up comedy act, after all.

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  22. DRACOY'S VOICE MAIL 4 REALJuly 14, 2010 at 1:02 PM

    Hey Anonymous, Dracoy isn't here right now. Please leave a message at the beep, h8r.

    ReplyDelete
  23. I've just downloaded iStripper, so I can have the best virtual strippers on my taskbar.

    ReplyDelete